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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you for all the reviews i really appreciate it. Also big Thank you to my Beta Gotkon a who always endeavours to correct the mess i make.

This story could finish here it's open to more.
Do you think it's a good idea?
Buffy ran blindly down the street, the tears spilling down her face. From the moment she saw him in the club she knew it was a bad idea coming back.

“What have I done?” her mind screamed.


She heard Spike shouting her name and panicking she ran across the road. The car swerved missing Buffy and screeching to a halt.

Spike watched in horror as she ran across the road. Sprinting across the road he grabbed Buffy by her upper arms and shook her from her trance.

“What is wrong with you? You almost got yourself killed.”

She glanced at his face and noticed his cheeks were red and his eyes glazed with tears. Unable to keep her emotions in check she broke down.

Spike’s arms enveloped themselves around her pulling her close, his cheek resting on the top of her head.

“I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you Buffy.”

Buffy bit her lip anxiously, her eyes closed for a moment while he placed a kiss on her head.

“Can I do this? What if this was meant to happen?

Releasing herself from his embrace, she hugged herself. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, she glanced at him.

“I was so afraid coming back here, so many memories. And when you said those words in the alley I had to run, because if I had stayed I wouldn’t have the strength to say no.”

Spike held his breath afraid he would interrupt and ruin the moment. He held her gaze their eyes locking.

“You know what the sad thing is? I wanted you to come and find me after I left.”

Spike lowered his head, his hand massaging the back of his neck.

“I went to see your mum after you had gone, she told me that you were living in L.A and you didn’t want to be contacted. I didn’t listen so I went to find you once. I spent the whole weekend, even took Xander with me.”


“You did?”

“Yeah. Didn’t find you of course, broke my heart coming back without you.”

Buffy’s head snapped up, her eyes wide watching as the pain crossed his features. He looked for her. She took a step forward and bit her lip; her fingers itched to touch him.

Spike looked down at his hand that was now encased within her warm touch, a small smile danced on her lips.

“Let’s get out of here.”


The walk home was met in comfortable silence; Buffy glanced at Spike as he pulled a cigarette out of the packet with one hand.

His other hand still clasped their fingers intertwined; the cigarette glowed in the night as he inhaled deeply.

“When did you start smoking?”

“Huh? I’ve been smoking for years.”

He wasn’t about to tell her his nerves couldn’t take it and he begun smoking when she left.

Spike turned the key in the lock to Xander’s apartment, pushing the door open. Searching for the light switch he fumbled and tripped over something.

Buffy quickly found the switch and flicked it upwards to see Spike sprawled in a heap on the floor, muttering to himself. Buffy clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle the bubble of laughter that had erupted from her throat.

Spike suddenly forgot about Xander’s over grown golf bag and looked up to see Buffy’s face. Suddenly forgetting his embarrassment, he grinned in her response.

“Yeah yeah, make fun of the guy on the floor with a sore arse.”

That only contributed to Buffy laughing even more, holding on to her side as tears trickled from the corner of eyes.

Spike jumped up and ran to her, tickling her sides. Both of them were laughing until they couldn’t breathe.

Buffy waited for him to kiss her until he pulled away and stepped back, her brow crinkled in confusion as he turned from her.

“Do you want a drink?”

Not waiting for an answer he went to the kitchen. He stood by the refrigerator thankful there was a cool breeze calming his heated body.

Buffy followed him into the kitchen and leaned against the wall, folding her arms across her chest.

“Did we just have a moment in there?”

Spike un-screwed the bottle of whiskey and poured two glasses. Handing one to Buffy he tipped the glass and swallowed the contents allowing the burn to caress his throat.

“I don’t want to push you Buffy, I know you’ve had a lot to deal with and tonight has brought everything back…”

Buffy quickly walked to him placing her glass on the table; taking a deep breath she held her hand to his lips.

“Can we just focus on what’s going on here?”

She motioned the space between them with a wave of her hand. He didn’t have time to focus he was only aware of her lips on his.

His hands touched every part of her body like it was his last, whispering and placing kisses across her jaw.



Spike flung his arm across the table knocking the glasses to the floor, the glass smashing into small pieces. He lifted his knee on the table to get closer. He knew Xander would be pissed if he broke the table.

Moving from the table he stood upright lifting her upwards into his hands. He pushed her against the wall, her tongue trailing along his lip.

“What is it with you and walls?”

Grinning he kissed her softly and carried her, moving towards the bedroom. He opened the door with a grunt, Buffy’s lips attacking his mouth making it difficult. If he didn’t get in the room soon he would just shag her right in the corridor. Placing her on her feet he kicked the door behind him.


Buffy suddenly grew nervous backing away from him. She scooted backwards on the bed, her head banging against the headboard. Frowning she rubbed the back of her head.

“Oh baby did that hurt?”

“Uh huh.”

Spike reached and rubbed the spot where she had injured herself, quickly moving to her shoulders.

She turned towards him and lifted her hand to touch his cheeks, he leaned into her touch his eyes closing.

Her hand softly moved from his cheek to his hair and back down, her thumb dancing over his lips.

She replaced her thumb with her lips applying soft pressure; her hands grabbed his shirt and pulled him towards her as she lay back.

His hands slipped underneath her dress to caress her legs, pushing the satin material up her body and over her head. With her dress suddenly thrown in the corner of the room, she sat up and moved to slowly un-button his shirt.

Resting on his knees, he grasped her hips and pulled her forward against his. Leaning over he licked and kissed her breasts giving them both lavish attention.

His tongue circled around her nipple, making it difficult for Buffy to breath. She placed a hand to push him back.

Suddenly flipping him so that they had switched places, she rocked her hips against his picking up the pace.

Spike couldn’t do anything but hold on for dear life, his hands pinching the skin on her hips which only made her moan louder.

“Buffy, oh bloody fucking hell.”

Buffy giggled as he continued to mutter obscenities, every time her body convulsed in laughter the vibrations shook him.

“You like that I do this to you, that I can make you shiver?” Whispering into his ear he groaned, his tongue licking his lips.

“You know I do you saucy thing.”

“How about when I take you inside me and ride you like a bucking bronco?”

“Is that the dirtiest you can be?” He gritted back.

Her hips moved faster hitting a certain spot that made her bite her bottom lip and close her eyes.

“Why don’t you fuck me hard, hard enough that I will explode. You know how wet I am baby, I bet you can taste it. Do you wanna taste it?”

Her voice took on such a dirty tone that he didn’t think possible, he moved from her much to annoyance and flipped her on her knees.

Entering her from behind he pushed hard, she braced her hands on the bed and leant forward. From the new angle he picked up the pace. Lifting his hand he slapped her ass, grinning as her skin turned pink.
He could hear her panting, her internal muscles squeezing, knowing she was almost there. Lifting her slightly he quickened his thrusts.

Buffy’s breasts felt heavy as he continued to push from behind, the deep feeling burst from her stomach and out into the room.

Spike soon followed, his hips slowly rocking while he came down from his high. He pulled her towards him and waited for his heartbeat to calm down.

Buffy closed her eyes feeling fully sated; turning so that she faced Spike she rested her head on his chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart.

She slowly opened her eyes to see Spike asleep; smiling to herself she kissed his chest. Her hand settled across his stomach, his arms tightening in response.

“I love you.”

The whispered words escaped from her lips as sleep took her away.

Spike’s heart was sure to burst, smiling he pulled her closer vowing never to let her slip from his fingers again.





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