Dawn knocked gently on the open door of their spare room and watched as Willow turned slowly towards her with a distracted “hmmm?”.
“Hey” she greeted, moving to sit next to the redhead on the cheerfully bright duvet cover. “You ok?”
“Of course Dawnie, why wouldn’t I be?” Even in her own ears Willow’s faux cheerful voice sounded tinny and hollow. She sighed and met Dawn’s eyes “I just, I feel really bad you know”
“I know.” replied the younger girl. Willow marvelled once again at the woman before her, the strange understanding she possessed, innocence without naivety shone from her ancient eyes. Willow’s own magical energy had long ago recognised the kindred power that flowed in Dawns blood and was humbled by its depth.
“You did what you had to do” The ‘Key’ continued. “You did what Buffy needed you to do”
“I know, I know. Its just…” she trailed off, turning her face away. “I know it was only magical suggestion. But its still just mind control by any other name and I…” she trailed off again looking back at Dawn and drawing strength from her quiet support. “After Tara… I promised myself I wouldn’t do anything she wouldn’t do, anything that would make her disappointed in me. She was so humble, so moral. I was arrogant back then, seduced by my own power, convinced that might was always right”
Again she met the brunette’s eyes, asking for, and receiving understanding. Reassured she continued, “I could’ve learned so much from her, so much about natural magic, and about right and wrong. I just wasn’t ready, and by the time I was, she was gone and it was too late.” She shook her head as if to clear it. “Would Tara have done what I did tonight?”
“Tara would never judge anything you did, if it was done for the right reason” Dawn assured her, her warm hand finding Willows knee in a shown of comfort. “Somebody had to do something fast, and it was you who rose to it. Like it always is.” She gave the witch a crooked smile “Remember what Buffy always said? You’re the big gun”
Both girls smiled at that and Dawn stood to leave “Don’t beat yourself up Willow. You’re not that girl anymore. Trust yourself. The rest of us do.”
With that she was gone, leaving the witch staring after her, a small smile on her lips.
……….
Dreams and memories merged in his exhausted mind, past images throwing themselves against the magical barriers in his mind. He dreamt of honeyed skin, warm and supple beneath his cold rough hands, fragranced with an intoxicating mixture of sweat and vanilla. He dreamt of angry words and small hard fists against his defenceless body. He dreamt of passion and hatred, of violence and indescribable tenderness, and at its centre a girl, golden and beautiful, faceless and yet so achingly familiar.
He swam towards consciousness, dreams mixing with reality. Warm hands skimmed over his torn chest in a tender caress, the air stirred with soft warm breath. His muddled senses reached out to her, calling her to him, she moved closer as he stirred, heat radiated from her, infinitely more comforting than the heavy blankets draped over his body.
Dreams slipped away. He raised an unsteady hand to find warm skin. He heard a sharp intake of breath. His had explored further, moving up a slim arm to cradle the silky skin of her neck, his thumb gently caressing the erratic beat beneath. She gasped again. Her vice came low and breathy “Spike”.
He forced his tired eyes to open. He had to see her, his dreams made flesh…
“Slayer” he shrieked, recoiling violently at the sight. She recoiled too, standing and backing off a pace, her face flaming with embarrassment. “What the bloody hell are you doing?” he growled angrily.
“I, er, I was umm” she faltered, desperately searching her panicked mind for a convincing excuse. He raised his eyebrows at her questioningly, an unpleasant sneer still curling his mouth.
“I was tending,” she blurted. “Er, tending your wounds, we’ve been taking turns and it was my turn. Yuck!” he was giving her that look again. The one filled with disdain and incredulity, conveying in no uncertain terms that not only did he disbelieve her, but he also disliked her intensely. “We, er, couldn’t have you dying, we, er, need information, on, er Marcus” Well done Buffy, wanna cram another ‘er’ into that sentence.
“I’ll heal up a sight better without Slayer hands all over me. Enough to make a fella ill it is” he gave her a disgusted look before making himself comfortable again and closing her eyes.
Buffy felt her anger rise, God he was infuriating. “You ungrateful bastard.” She hissed causing him to open his eyes and fix her with a challenging stare. Buffy responded in kind. “I risk my ass to save you pathetic excuse for a hide, from a bunch of claw wielding demons. Drag your sorry ass all the way back here, put you in my bed, get you blood at three in the morning, and you have the nerve! God, could you be anymore annoying?”
“Didn’t ask you for nothing Slayer!” he countered pushing himself up to a sitting position. “Never asked for your help”
“Oh” she responded her tone biting “Of course, you had that pack o’ nasties beat. I shoulda realised that lying on the floor bleeding was all part of the plan”
His jaw clenched visibly as he moved his legs painfully off the bed. “Better to be dust than owe the Slayer anything. And as for your bed! Smells of Slayer, ‘t’s makin’ me nauseous, so I’ll just toddle off now” He stood shakily, leaning heavily on the wall.
“Fine” she countered, hurt fuelling her anger “See how far you get, like that, no blood, no weapons.”
“I’ll manage” he retorted, “you can keep your pig’s swill, I’ll take mine straight form the vein.”
She bristled, crossing her arms and stepping aside “You couldn’t hunt down a kitten in your condition. Go on then, I really need to wash my sheets”
He gave her another hate filled glare and summoning what was left of his strength pushed off the wall towards the door. He only made it half way. His head swam, and his legs gave out.
Strong arms, slim and powerful caught him before he hit the floor. “Spike please” she begged, all traces of anger gone from her voice, replaced with concern. “Please just go back to bed, you need to rest”
She was leading him towards the bed. He hadn’t the strength to resist, even if he wanted to. He didn’t. Every inch of his body hurt, and the bed was soft and warm and smelt of nice, and the Slayer was asking nicely and she was warm too and she smelt so good too, like jasmine and soft feminine skin.
He let her lay him down and bring the covers up around his chest, her hands didn’t linger this time, her touch was almost professional against his skin, gentle but indifferent. He watched her leave through already closing eyes, sleep again reaching our to claim him. “Slayer” his weak voice stopped her at the door and she turned to him “Thanks” he whispered and was rewarded by a radiant smile.
“Your welcome” she answer her voice soft and filled with tenderness, but he was already asleep.
………
“The generals are ready sire” Solomon informed his master with a slight bow.
“Excellent. There are no tribes yet to arrive?” he asked
“All are here sire, and all are ready”
“Good, you have the offerings?”
“Yes sire, just as you commanded”
The generals where a fierce some group of creatures, warlords for all the demon tribes under Marcus’ banner. Master vampires in their human guises sat alongside huge Polgara demons and Fyral. Bedrog and Trex demon, natural enemies stood together at the back of the room.
Horned Vaith demons drank Marcus’ fine blood laced wine and discussed battle tactics with scaly Vahrall warlords.
Silent Apeathans shamed by the failure of Jacob’s assassination team stood alone to one side, while demons of all shape and sizes milled around the large oak table.
“My friends” Marcus’ greeting brought silence to the room. He smiled feeling the power of the amulet working it’s magic on their minds.
“The battle plans progress well,” he informed them. “The slayers have positioned themselves just as we anticipated, and our own force grows in strength”
“Each of you has played his” he broke off to give Anastasia, mistress of the largest vampire army ever assembled a charming smile “and her, part well. All is prepared, we need only wait until the alignment, and then we shall attack”
A bold Chaos demon rose to question Marcus. “If all is ready lord, why wait until the alignment?” murmurs of agreement rippled through the room.
“Patience comrades” Marcus chided gently. “It must be as it has been seen. It must be as I command” the amulet around his neck glowed in the softly lit room, lacing it’s wearers words with power. Marcus could feel them bending to his will, accepting his commands.
“All is ready” he addressed them again, his voice congenial. “We have time for a little relaxation, please follow me”
He led them to a large hall, high ceilinged and echoing. In it’s centre huddled a group of almost a hundred terrified humans.
Young women, for the vampire lords, mothers clutching wailing babies, favour delicacy of the Vahrall. Witches for the Bedrog and handsome boys for the Apeathans.
“Please” Marcus invited, with a flourish of his hand “Enjoy”
Marcus stood beside Solomon and watched the carnage with an amused smile, laughing occasionally at the humans’ futile attempts to escape their attackers. Blood stained the floor and screams echoed against the cold walls.
………….
“Have I been asleep long?” he asked, not opening his eyes. He had felt her there when he woke up, her presence filling his sense. Comforting and familiar, affection radiated through her warm hand where it stroked his. He smiled softly and opened his eyes. She was radiant, with her glossy hair and soulful eyes, her expression soft and indulgent
“Hours” she answered “was pretty worried about you for a while.” She moved her hand to brush his tousled curls of his forehead. “You know we have got to do something about your hair”
He gave her a mock offended look. “What the bloody hell is wrong with my hair”
She arched a perfectly manicured eyebrow and smirked at him “Well to coin a phrase, ‘you look like a complete poofter’”
He couldn’t help but laugh at that, her American accent making the slang sound strange. “Okay then pet wha’ d’ya propose we do, bleach?”
She regarded him critically. “Umm. I was think more, Spikey, no pun intended, maybe a few highlights”
“Highlights” he sounded appalled. “No bloody way!”
“Please Spike, I’ll do it for you. I’m good I promise. Please” she pushed out her full lower lip and fluttered her eyelashes.
Spike felt himself weakening, she pouted at him again “Please” she whined.
“Okay Nibblet.” He stroked her glossy hair “Never could say no to a beautiful woman”
She clapped and bounced in her seat, the action endearingly childlike. “Yay! Thanks Spike”
Buffy turned away from the scene, tears pricking her eyes. How had this happened? It was her he loved. She’d been his everything. He’d only looked after Dawn for her sake. She’d been so sure of it at the time, so certain that the affection he showed her sister had been an act put on for her benefit. “Self-involved much?” She muttered to herself.
Of course he had always loved Dawn, he’d been like a big brother to her, but Dawn wasn’t a child anymore. He’d said it himself she was a beautiful woman, and Spike was a man, a man with no memory of the gangly teenager she used to be.
Stop it Buffy, she commanded herself, it’s not like that. But then again Dawn had always had a crush on Spike, if he showed and interest maybe she would. Stop it, stop it, stop it! You have Richard now; you have your normal life.
She sat down on the stairs, head buried in her hands. How hollow it all seemed now, she was living this life for him, but he was here and he didn’t care how she lived.
Her life rang hollow and fake in her mind, nice normal Richard so boring and pedestrian compared to the vampire upstairs. Upstairs with her sister, jealousy gripped her again, tightening painfully around her heart. But it wasn’t about Dawn, it was about Spike, and he didn’t want her anymore. All she had left were memories of an old life he didn’t remember and thoughts of a new life she’d never wanted.
She curled up against the banister and cried, silent tears flowing freely down her pretty face.
A/N Thanks so much fo rthe feed back.
nip1, glad you like it, someone was reading as Iwas posting on friday, was that you?
Hi KMS How you doing at the moment I update alot, I'm something of a review whore I'm ashamed to say, none of this doing it for myself stuff.
Angela - The good times with Buffy? what show where you watching? ;) the memories are coming back, but it ain't gonna be easy on them.
Hi Cali, how you doing? My first cross archive reviewer. Glad you liked it, I always wanted Spike to say that line with regards to Buffy one way or another. I like Dawn too, I don't know how she turned out so well in my story she's not one of my favourite charactes in the show.
Thanks again to all of you I write so fast when i get reviews
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