Spike was dreaming, in his dream she had come to him again, that faceless golden woman. They fought across the dreamscape of his mind, sometimes side by side, sometimes with each other. The dream changed, sounds of passion filling his subconscious mind, a breathy female voice chanting his name in ecstasy, his dream self open his eyes to look down at her, blond hair obscuring her face.
He leant forward burying his head in her neck and breathed her heady scent, sweat overlaid with vanilla, feminine and powerful. She flipped them over so she could ride him, powerful muscles contracting around him, bring them both to a shuddering climax. She slumped forward, her hair falling over his face, the scent of her filling his sex addled senses.
He took a deep satisfied breath, sweat overlaid with jasmine.
“Ahh!” he came awake with a startled cry, grasping the memory of his dream tightly. He shook his head, it couldn’t be. But the scent was the same, youthful vanilla replaced with sophisticated jasmine, but the scent beneath, the essence beneath the same.
The golden goddess of his dreams. Buffy.
He cursed his fractured mind, where did dreams and memories mesh? What was fantasy and what reality? Had they truly been lovers, it would explain a lot, the way she acted, the strange intense looks she gave him, when she thought he wasn’t watching her. The undeniable call of her body to his.
He lay back, breathing in the now familiar smell of her sheets. A glance at the clock told him it was just past four, sunset was hours away yet, but he was certain he wouldn’t sleep again that day.
Wandering barefoot through the house he found Dawn lying face down on the living room floor, her head propped up on her hands, an obviously ancient book opened in front of her. She looked up when he entered, greeting him with a friendly “Hi Spike”
He didn’t acknowledge her greeting, just stared at her until she became nervous, “Gee Spike. You’re kinda freaking me out. What’s up?”
“I want the truth Dawn” he told her, voice low and stern.
“Ummm, the truth about what?” she asked nervously, refusing to meet his eyes.
“You know about what,” he snapped impatiently “About everything, about Buffy”
“What?” she squeaked, before readjusting the tone of her voice “I mean, what makes you think there’s anything to tell?”
He looked at her, his… his friend he supposed, if she was to make him her confident, he would have to do the same for her. “I…” he began uncertainly. “I knew you from the start, knew I cared about you, would risk my life for you.”
He glanced at her before continuing, “but whatever I feel for you, it’s not enough to make me wanna change. Not enough to make me wanna be, I don’t know, better”
She nodded her understanding, his brotherly affection for her was not the life altering force his love for Buffy had been, it was gentler, easier, but also less intense.
He took a deep breath, “But just recently, I have wanted to” he saw her confusion and clarified “Wanted to be better, for…” he trailed off, this was bollocks, he was insane. Him and the Slayer, they’d laugh their arses of if they knew what he was thinking.
“For Buffy” she completed, not a question, just a soft confirmation.
He looked up sharply, suspicion evident on his face, “Yeah” he agreed, “So I figure there’s a hell of a lot more to the little tale you lot spun me, am I right?”
Dawn sighed, Buffy had been adamant that Spike should not be told about their relationship, but somehow it seem unjust to keep him in the dark, especially if he was beginning to suspect.
“Even if I knew the whole of it, it’s not my story to tell,” she told him gently, but firmly “You’ll have to talk to Buffy”
“But there is a story to tell?” he asked nervously. “Something about me and the Slayer, something that explains, what the hell I was doing saving the bloody world”
“Yes” Dawn answered simply. “You and Buffy, it was complicated, and I don’t even know the half of it, but yes, there’s a story”
…………….
“So, what do you think?” Richard asked, pouring her another glass of Merlot.
Buffy frowned, what had he been talking about, probably something to do with the wedding, damn, she should’ve been paying attention. He was suspicious enough already. “Oh definitely” she ventures hopefully.
He frowned. “Definitely red, or definitely blue?” he asked a strange tone of tired acceptance creeping into his voice.
“Blue!” she affirmed, her mind supplying an image of Spike’s cerulean eyes. “I like blue”
“Blue it is then.” He took a sip of wine and watched her face. “Buffy” he began, his voice sad and serious, “if there’s anything wrong, anything that’s bothering you, please tell me. Is it the wedding? If it’s too soon for you we can postpone. I don’t want you to feel pressured”
“What? No of course not. No pressure here. I am pressure free Buffy” God she was a terrible liar, he had always found it comforting, that she lied so badly, knowing she would never be able to hide anything from him. But now, it hurt, hurt to be lied to and not know why. Hurt to be played by the only woman who had ever really captured his heart.
“Buffy” he tried again. “Please, I want you to be happy, I love you”
She smiled a broad plastic smile that set his teeth on edge. “I know, and I am happy trust me”
He looked down ‘I know’, it was the best he had ever received from Buffy, of course he had always wanted to hear his sentiments returned, but before now it hadn’t hurt so God damn much.
He looked at her again, she was prattling about work, covering her deceit with mindless babble, did she really think he would be so easily fooled?
…………
He dropped her off at her house, leaning in for a kiss that caught her cheek rather then her lips as she turned her face away. “Night” she whispered softy before getting out of the car and walking towards the house. He watched her go sighing deeply as he pulled away from the curb.
“Well, well, well” his thickly accented voice sounded from the darkness to her left, causing her to jump, nervousness and anticipation sending her pounding heart into overdrive. “So how was your date Slayer? Nice posh dinner in some swanky restaurant with you loaded boyfriend?”
“What do you care Spike?” she spat. “I don’t have time for this, I’m tired and I’m going to bed” with that she turned back towards the house, only to cut off when the vampire positioned himself in her path.
“Ah, ah, ah! Not so fast” he purred, his voice flowing like honey through night air. “You and me are gonna have a little chat first.”
“Get out of my way Spike” She ordered straightening up.
“Don’t think so Slayer” he titled his head and let his voice drop to seductive rumble, “It seems that you haven’t been completely honest about the last few years. Had myself a little chat with the Nibblet, seems there’s a thing or two you shoulda told me”
“Dawn” she exclaimed angrily. “What did she say? I’ll kill her”
“Now now Slayer, Dawn didn’t have anything to say I wasn’t beginning to work out on my own. You think I don’t know what you’re thinking when I get close to you? You think I can’t feel it?”
She pursed her lips and tried to pass him. “Get out of my way” she told him again. He was mocking her, using her feelings for him to hurt her, she had to get away, she couldn’t stand it.
“Make me.” he challenged, his tongue stroking the back of his teeth, for a moment her eyes followed its progress, before she snapped out of it.
“Fine” she hit him hard in the nose sending him stumbling back towards the house.
He laughed, straightening up and fixing her with a knowing a stare. “Now is that anyway to treat and old.” He paused for effect, letting her stew “boyfriend?”
Her eyes met his sharply, denial pouring from her lips. “If Dawn told you that she’s crazy,” she retorted indignantly.
“Oh so I’m wrong?” he asked his voice excessively innocent. “You don’t want me, your heart doesn’t beat ten to the dozen whenever I get close to you. You weren’t feeling me up when I was in my weakened state”
“You’re a pig Spike” she spat, again trying to pass the vampire.
“Yeah!” he replied laughter in his voice. “But you still want me”
She punched him again, hard, tears spilling from her eyes, “what does it matter what I want?” she almost screamed, swinging wildly at him.
He caught her arm and pushed against the side of the house, her body trapped firmly under his. She went limp in his arms, anger seeping away “You don’t love me anymore”
He looked at her, her teary green eyes bright in the moonlight, expression still defiant. Her hot body burned him, where he pressed against her igniting his own desire. “No” He drawled, letting his lips brush her ear, delighting in the shiver of excitement the action provoked. “I don’t love you yet”
With that he was gone disappearing into the blackness. Leaving the Slayer propped against the wall, her eyes wide with shock, her breath coming in laboured gasps
………..
A/N wanted to get this up before long weekend, so its pretty short, hope you like
Some action here for you Lizzy
Love from TheBear
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