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Chapter Fourteen: I’m Ready

She could feel him behind her, walking at a distance when she reached the park. She wanted to keep going, ignore his presence, but she couldn’t. It was impossible.

“What do you want?” She asked, turning suddenly.

“Think you could get a guy all riled up and back down, pet?” He questioned, stepping out from behind a tree. He looked different, the fact that he wasn’t in all black, making him look innocent. He wore blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and a blue button down beneath his leather jacket. It usual duster was MIA.

“I told you, have Faith finish it. She has before.” She crossed her arms over her chest, his arousal going haywire at the sight.

“Buffy, I was going to tell you.” Upon the rolling of her eyes he pointed out, “I never said I was a saint.”

“The thing is, that I knew you weren’t. I started liking you so much and I ignored the truth. I was stupid, and blind!” Her voice rose, and she was near yelling.

“Buffy, just give me a chance…I’ll tell you everything.” He pleaded.

It hurt to see the flicker of pain in his eyes, but she was feeling betrayed. Knowing that he had so many other girls, and she was just another on a list. “I don’t really feel like hearing it…ever.” Her voice was soft, and she turned her back to him. She slowly started walking.

Spike watched her retreating form. “I love you.” He said, so she could hear.

And she did.

*

The next morning, Spike was at the front door of the Summers’ home with flowers in hand. He rang the bell, and Dawn answered.

“Hey Spike.” She said cheerfully. “Peace offering for Buffy?”

“Figured I should grovel…since I’m here to do the lawns.” He said with a sad smile.

“I warned you about her stubborn problem,” Dawn said. “She knew you were coming, and didn’t come home last night. I think she slept over Willow’s.” She could only hope he didn’t catch the lie, or she was out five bucks.

Spike’s face seemed to drop more, if it was even possible. “I understand. I’ll just get out back.” He handed the bouquet of blue and purple tulips to the mini-Buffy before him, and went out back to start his work.

Buffy watched him from behind the curtain in her, Willow at her side.

“Are we going to hide up here until he leaves?” Willow asked from Buffy’s side.

“That’s the better part of the plan. Avoid him until graduation.” Buffy replied, watching him carefully, as he got the lawn mower out of the shed, and started it.

Willow shook her head. “This is stupid, Buffy. You obviously love him. Get on with my vicarious smoochies, forget his past.” She suggested.

“I can’t…I bet he never would have told me if I hadn’t heard in the bathroom. The thing I really don’t understand is how Faith and Dru are suddenly on the same side, when Faith defended me from the witch a couple of weeks ago.” Buffy threw herself back on the bed, Willow sitting beside her.

“Maybe they’ve always had an alliance, but Faith wanted to keep it under wraps. She is evil.” Willow stated, her disgust for the brunette increasing by each second. “But that’s not what’s bothering you, Buffy. Tell me the truth.” She prodded.

With a sigh, Buffy sat up, and looked at her best friend. “If Dru shared him with more than just Faith, which I know she did, he has done things that I haven’t even imagined. He’s experienced, and I’m…not.”

“That doesn’t mean he’ll like you any less.” Willow assured her.

“How can you be so confident? You haven’t even given Oz any, but it doesn’t matter to you. All I had was Angel.” Buffy wanted to handle things as the redhead at her side did.

“I’m scared to do the big…you know, with Oz…I just know that he loves me enough not to try and compare me to anyone else.” Willow said, her eyes looking dreamy.

“Spike is different. He’s…Spike.” Buffy said.

“It looks to me like you’re just trying to make excuses. But I won’t push you. I think you need a latte and some shopping.” Willow suggested.

“Let’s hurry and sneak out the front before he gets there.” Buffy stood quickly, grabbing her leather jacket from her closet.

*

After a quick stop at Xander’s, Buffy returned home at seven. She was dreading school, and wanted nothing more than to be home tutored. ‘Would Mom spring for it? It would save her a lot of money on clothes. I’d only need pajamas.’

She entered and was shocked at the site of Spike on the couch, before the TV. “What are you doing here? You always do this…stuff…come places I am when I don’t want to see you.” She babbled loudly.

“Since you forgot your cell phone, and your mum had somewhere to be tonight, I offered to watch the nibblet.” He said, glancing at her, and back at the television. They were giving repeats of Friends.

“Oh.” She felt a bit stupid. “Where’s Dawn?” She asked.

“In her room. She’s on the phone I bet. Little one is quite fond of the conversation.” He knew because she’d talked his ear off for three hours before his savior called her. He’d have to remember to give the Janice girl a hug.

“Thanks…you can leave now.” She turned, and began making her way up the stairs.

“Buffy,” she paused at her name, “we’re going to have to talk.”

She sighed. “Come upstairs.” She had thought of nothing but him the whole day, and she was prepared to hear every dirty secret he kept hidden. She wasn’t sure she wanted to further their relationship, but being so close, but keeping her distance from him was killing her.

He followed her, looking at the back of her head. He wondered what was going on in there, surprised that she was ready to chat.

Upon entrance, she dropped her shopping bags on the floor with her jacket, and reached up to pull her hair out of a ponytail. “I’m ready. What are you going to tell me to make this all better?” She asked sitting on her bed.





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