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Author's Chapter Notes:
For the purpose of this fiction, Joyce is not ill, Spike's invitation has never been revoked and Riley is already well and truly out of the picture.

Also, thank you all who have left me those nice reviews! If you haven't already, please leave feedback. It works wonders for the muse!!
As soon as she had stepped outside the crypt, the heavens had opened and she had had no choice but to run. By the time she had turned onto Revello Drive and made it into the house, her hair was matted to her head and her clothes had taken the form of a second skin. Shivering, she flung her keys on the dresser as her eyes adjusted to the darkness. The house was empty for the first time she could remember in recent history. Her mother was doing an overnighter in LA and Dawn was staying at Julie’s. Any other night, this would have been bliss but tonight all she felt was an overwhelming loneliness. The thought of getting into her bed and trying to get to sleep made her chest tighten as she knew she would be haunted by all that remained unspoken and all of the things she wanted to say to Spike but never could. Whatever had happened between them tonight had changed their relationship forever. There was no way around it.

Sighing, she stepped into the gloom of the living room and flicked on the fire. The flames leapt to life as she stood entranced by the flashes of colour and the welcoming heat. The room was bathed in dancing shadows yet looked strangely cosy. Peeling off her sodden jacket, she decided that she would stay in the living room for the night. Sleep wasn’t going to come easy and the warmth of the fire curling around her chilled body was enticing enough to convince her that the rest of the house would be far too cold for her to even think of settling anywhere else.

She yanked off her jeans and her sweater until she remained in her underwear. Spotting a blanket on the sofa, she grabbed it and threw it around her shoulders. It smelt familiar…. Holding the blanket to her nose, she inhaled deeply. Spike. He must have left it here on one of his ‘random’ walks. Her eyes filled up as she drew the material tighter around her body. Her minds eye conjured up their earlier encounter in the graveyard. The way he had grabbed her and kissed her and made her feel so alive and so…wanting. She didn’t realise she was wanting for anything until they had shared that kiss. If he hadn’t have gathered her up and taken her to his crypt she would have carried on regardless. The feelings he evoked were powerful, new and frighteningly addictive.

And now, it was ruined. Over before it had even begun. Another false starter of a relationship. At least this time she could console herself that he hadn’t ended it after they had slept together. That was usually the time that they started running. Well, apart from Riley. Took a bit longer but the end result was still the same. He was gone and she was alone. And upset and frustrated… Riley, although he had lasted a slightly longer distance than the others, was lacking somewhat when it had come to the more intimate side of their relationship. He was strictly a missionary guy, clock on and clock off. Literally, clockwork. Her entire body tensed at the memory. Normal sure wasn’t what it was cracked up to be.

Then she had found Spike. Sure, she had known him a lot longer than Riley but she never really saw him. Not properly. Tonight, she had found him. And tonight she had lost him. Breathing deeply, she inhaled his scent once more, fighting back the tears and instead focusing on how he had made her feel. How he ignited something so deep within she thought now that she may have imagined the whole thing. Nothing had ever reached to her that deeply. His eyes and the way they had penetrated hers… She groaned with remembrance.

Slowly, she unfurled the blanket from around her body, bunching it up against her breasts. She lay in front of the fire, clutching the cover against her almost naked form. Burying her face in the folds she whimpered at the sudden wave of loss that washed over her. She needed him. She wanted him, wanted to feel him against her body. Rolling onto her back, she skimmed her body with her fingertips… featherlight strokes from shoulders to thighs, all the while keeping her eyes closed and breathing deeply. Her skin was warm from the fire but her hands were still slightly cool from the rain. Suddenly, she found herself craving the cold… anything to replicate the feel of his body against hers. Grabbing her damp jacket, she rubbed it against her skin. The conflicting sensations of hot and cold made her gasp. Slipping her hand between her legs she stroked her outer lips firmly… she could feel her juices already, slick and spilling from her at the thought of him. Arching her back, she spread her legs wider, using two fingers to outline her opening, teasing. She imagined him doing the same with his cock and her hips thrust upwards craving what wasn’t there. She whimpered in frustration, aching for release, for completion. Slowly, she inserted a finger… her pussy clenching immediately at the invasion. She moved her hips, sliding her finger in slowly… deep. But it wasn’t enough. She needed to be filled, to be taken, to be with him. His face hovered behind her eyelids as she inserted another finger. Pumping them hard she circled her clit with her thumb but something was holding her back, she couldn’t quite get there. And she was so close… She was kicking her legs now, frustrated and broken at the thought she couldn’t even satisfy herself. Tears were rolling down her face as she fought to bring herself over the edge but couldn’t. Rolling over, she buried her face in the blanket once more, her body racking with sobs, her fingers still buried deep inside her.

She didn’t hear the front door open. She didn’t hear it close. But she heard the approaching footsteps. By then it was too late. “Spike!”

“Buffy?”





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