Author's Chapter Notes:
This is the final chapter for now. I hope to get back to this soon, if only to get Spike and Spikebot together :) Thanks for reading and commenting!
“Hi!” Buffybot smiled brightly at the woman who opened the door of the neat little house nestling in the quiet suburbs. “We’re looking for Warren.”

Warren’s mother smiled back warmly. “Oh! Are you friends of his?”

Buffybot considered. “Not exactly. He made us.”

“He…?” The smile became vaguely bemused. “I’m sorry, dear?”

“Made us. Only he didn’t make Spike quite right,” Buffybot went on, frowning slightly.

“Oh… I… I see.” The bemused smile took on a slightly nervous edge. “Well, Warren’s not here …”

“We really need to see him. Will he be home any time soon?”

“No… no, I don’t think so. Warren’s… left town for a while.”

“How long is a while? We're really kinda desperate.”

“I-I’m not altogether sure. He left in… a bit of a hurry…” Warren’s mother shrugged helplessly.

“Oh.” Buffybot frowned. “That’s a problem.”

“I’m sorry, dear. Is it anything I can help with maybe?” Innate politeness was just about holding on.

Buffybot brightened. “Oh! Maybe you could! It’s just that when Warren made Spike he forgot his penis.”

Spikebot rolled his eyes and growled, “Oh, tell everybody about it, why don’t you?”

“His… penis?” The slightly nervous edge of Warren’s mother’s smile was rapidly turning into full blown alarm.

“So, if you could just maybe make him one? Fully functioning, naturally. About…” she held up her hands “this big, and this thick.” Her fingers described a not insubstantial circle.

“I was thinking bigger…” Spikebot murmured.

“A… penis?”

“Well, yes, because really – he’s missing out on rather a lot without one, don’t you think? I mean Spike… the other Spike… his penis is just amazing…” Buffybot rolled her eyes. “You should see what he can do with it.”

“Mine’ll be better… I have some ideas…” Spikebot put in hopefully.

“Pee…pee…” Warren’s mother said faintly.

“Penis.” Buffybot supplied with a bright smile. “Fully functioning.”

“He… I…” Warren’s mother had turned very pale indeed. She cast a last frantic look at the two ‘bots then backed away slowly “I think I need to go and have a little lie down…” she whimpered, closing the door carefully behind her.

Buffybot frowned at the closed door. “Well, that was kind of rude.”

“Well, in fairness, pet, I don’t suppose she gets that sort of request very often,” Spikebot reasoned.

“Still no cause to be rude.” Buffybot continued to frown in thought. “Oh!” She brightened, smile firmly back in place. “No matter! I have a plan B!”

Spikebot rolled his eyes as he was dragged off down the street. “Look, love, all this is well an’ good an’ I’ll be right glad to get kitted out an’ all, but,” he stopped and turned her to face him. “D’you wanna fight?”

“Fight?” Buffybot gave him a puzzled frown.

“Oh, c’mon! S’been ages since I hit anything! Got all these fancy fightin’ moves an’ I can’t use ‘em! Bleedin’ frustratin’ for a bloke, I can tell you! You gotta do it regular, you know?”

“You do?”

“Yeah. I mean, you can practise on your own, but it’s not the same.” He dropped his head and looked at Buffybot from under lowered lashes, pout in place. “Please?” he wheedled.

Buffybot shook her head firmly. “Oh, I couldn’t fight with you! I’m not programmed to fight Spike. Find Spike, help Spike, have sex with Spike, make Spike happy, yes, and I’ll be able to do all that with you – at least just as soon as we get you a penis – but fight? I can do the pretend fighting until Spike’s sinister attraction gets the better of me and he takes me in his manly arms, but not the real thing…” she looked at him doubtfully.

“If you’re programmed to make Spike happy, then fightin’ will make me real happy.” Spikebot wasn’t giving up without a fight.

“Hmmm. Well, I guess…” Buffybot wasn’t convinced.

“An’ another thing…” Spikebot leered knowingly, “I’m not Spike, am I? Just look like him.”

“But if you’re not Spike, then I’m not Buffy and you’re only programmed to fight Buffy,” Buffybot reasoned.

Spikebot cocked his head. “You’re near enough for me, love.”

Buffybot considered, then smiled. “OK! Body contact of any sort would be fun right now.”

“I’ll give you body contact…” Spikebot grinned happily setting his shoulders. He raised his fists. “Slayer…” he growled happily.

“Stop!” Buffybot held up her hand. Spikebot’s programming kicked in and he ground to a frustrated halt. “It’ll have to be the cemetery. That’s where I need to do it.”

Spikebot dropped his fists. “Fair enough.” It was Buffybot’s turn to be dragged off down the street. “Let’s go.” He wasn’t risking her changing her mind.

~~~~~~

Later, Spikebot lay on the grass in a happy haze, drawing on a post-combatal cigarette. “That was the best, love,” he purred happily.

“Hmm.” Lying next to him, Buffybot frowned and wriggled her shoulders.

Spikebot propped himself on one elbow and looked down at her. “What’s up? Didn’t you enjoy that?”

“I don’t understand. We had lots of body contact. I should be…”

“Satisfied?” Spikebot provided hopefully.

Buffybot nodded and pouted. “But I’m not. I-I’m all…” she wriggled her shoulders again. “My skin is all hot. Do I look hot to you?”

Spikebot leered. “Oh, yeah.”

Buffybot smiled up at him seductively. “Perhaps you’d better feel me. Just to make sure.”

Spikebot frowned. “Oh. OK.” He pressed his hand to her forehead. “Well, you’re a bit warm, but…”

“Oh!” Buffybot’s pout deepened.

Spikebot was at a loss. “What’s up? D’you fight some more?”

“Not really… it’s just that Spike…” She looked up at him. “Kiss me.” She reached up and dragged Spikebot’s mouth firmly to hers.

“So. What do you think?” she asked when she finally released him.

Spikebot looked down at her dazedly. He blinked. "Well, I.." He ran his tongue over his lips thoughtfully. “Can we do that again?” he asked, bending towards her.

Buffybot held up a hand. “Yes, but there’s other stuff we could do,” she smiled up at him suggestively. “Better stuff…”

“But we’ve covered this! I can’t, can I?” He gestured to his crotch.

“No problemo. Spike has other ways. Ways that don’t need a penis.”

“Oh?” The concept was clearly beyond Spikebot. “Like what?”

“Oh, I’ll teach you,” Buffybot purred, pushing his head downwards.

Happily for the Buffybot, Spikebot’s adaptive programming was more than a match for the job. He was a very quick learner.





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