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Author's Chapter Notes:
Got this one up - don't know about tonight's...
Chapter Fourteen

For long seconds, they remained still, joined not only by their still-linked bodies, but by the teeth holding on to each other’s flesh. Spike was the first to move, gently removing his fangs from her neck and running his tongue over the small wounds he left. Buffy unclenched her jaw and let go of his shoulder, kissing the bloody bruise left there by her human teeth.

When Spike pushed himself up on his arms to look down at her and she could see the mark she’d made, she gasped and began, “Oh, Spike, I—“

The vampire shook his head, gazing down at her with wonder in his eyes.

“If you’re going to apologize for biting me, pet, please don’t. Don’t want you to be sorry about it.” He ducked his head a little and peered at her from under his thick lashes, “Anyway, I think you need to take a look at your own neck first.”

“But...but... that had to hurt you! It looks awful.”

“Biting and pain are part of love-making for a vampire, Slayer. You couldn’t have done anything more erotic and...lo- affectionate...if you’d wanted to. I’m just sorry I couldn’t control the demon enough to prevent him from biting you back.”

“It didn’t hurt,” she said softly, not meeting his eyes. “It felt kind of...” She paused and looked up at him questioningly, “It felt good. Does that make me a bad Slayer? Shouldn’t I be more wigged out about it?”

“Wasn’t meant to hurt you. Pet. That bite had nothing to do with the kind of bites you’re dodging while you’re doin’ your job, and everything to do with how I feel about you. On some level, the Slayer in you recognized that.”

“Just like your chip did, I guess,” she mused, missing the almost invisible flinch when she mentioned his chip. He didn’t answer her, just rolled to his side bringing her with him. She shuddered briefly when he slipped out of her and couldn’t suppress a whimper at the loss of his presence inside her body. He pulled the covers up and wrapped his arms back around her to enjoy the body heat trapped under there.

There was a long, comfortable silence as they basked in the afterglow of their love-making, and Buffy was just drifting off to sleep when Spike spoke softly.

“I don’t think the chip is working, Buffy,” he said without inflection. He felt her grow rigid in his arms and cursed himself for a fool. He waited, neither removing his arms from around her body, nor trying to pull her closer. He waited patiently for her to make a decision, his lack of breathing and heart beat enabling him to hide the fear that was making his stomach hurt.

Just as he was sure she was going to stake him, he felt her body relax against his and he gasped in relief when she placed a light kiss on his bare chest.

“So,” she began conversationally, “what makes you think so?”

In a flat voice, Spike recited the recent incidents that caused him to wonder about the chip’s functionality.

“Does this mean you could be out there eating people again?” she asked, her tone giving him no hint what she was thinking.

“I guess it does. Haven’t tried it.”

She nodded against his chest, tracing her finger lightly around one of his nipples and watching as it hardened immediately.

“Why not?” she asked in a deceptively mild tone of voice.

He sat up and gaped at her. “Why not? In case you hadn’t noticed, luv, I’m living with the bloody Slayer. Thought you might have a little problem with it,” he finished sarcastically, as he flopped back down beside her.

“So, if I wasn’t here, you would be? Finding happy meals on legs, I mean.”

She kept her voice carefully controlled so that he wouldn’t know how badly she wanted to pretend he’d never said anything about it.

(I’ve got to think like the Slayer, not like Buffy. If Spike is dangerous again, I have to do something about it. That’s my job. It’s who I am.)

Buffy had forgotten that she was lying next to a master vampire and that just keeping her voice even and steady wasn’t enough to prevent him from realizing she was upset. Her increased breathing, accelerated heart rate, and the faintest smell of tears told him his next words were going to be vitally important to both of them.

“I...I don’t know if I can give you an honest answer to that, pet. You ARE here. Being with you...it colors everything I do. Has done for a long time. If you’re asking do I still want to feed, to hunt, to kill, to feel fresh warm blood filled with fear slidin’ down my throat – then, yeah, I don’t think that will ever go away. It’s what I am, luv. I’m sure, if you could get Peaches to give you an honest answer, he’d tell you that even the soul doesn’t make that craving go away. It just allows him to be ashamed of it.”

He felt Buffy stiffen again, and he knew she wanted to pull away from him. He tightened his arm around her almost imperceptibly, mentally willing her to let him explain.

“Hear me out, love... please. I’m trying to be as honest with you as I can and that means I have to own up to my nature. I can’t pretend it doesn’t exist.”

Buffy struggled weakly, more as though she thought she should move away than because she really wanted to and Spike loosened his arm, trying to hide the fear her withdrawal was feeding.

“And I can’t pretend I’m unhappy that the chip is out. That soddin’ bugger the other night would have split your pretty little head open if I hadn’t stopped him. So, I’m not sorry I can hurt humans again. Won’t pretend I am.” He touched her cheek lightly, turning her to look at his pleading eyes. “But, I can promise you, I won’t do anything that would make you have to stake me. I can control myself – all the chip did was give me a reason to do it. It didn’t stop me from trying to kill. I did that myself when I realized I was gonna fry my brain if I kept it up.”

“But your reason’s gone now,” she responded, fighting the urge to soothe the worried look off his face.

Spike shook his head, never taking his eyes off hers.

“I’ve got a better one, now,” he said softly, his eyes searching for some glimmer of understanding and acceptance. “A much better one,” he added in a whisper, daring to lean in and brush his lips over hers.

Buffy didn’t try to pretend she didn’t understand what he was saying, just gave in to the relief his words inspired. She closed her eyes to keep the tears in and fell back against his chest, sighing when his arms went around her again. She didn’t want to admit, even to herself, the fear that had gripped her when she thought she might be faced once again with slaying a vampire she cared about.

While Spike sprinkled soft kisses over her head and face, she wrapped herself around his comforting body and let herself fall into an exhausted sleep, knowing there would be no more dreams that night.

~~~~~~~~~~


While a suspicious vampire watched carefully, Xander walked around the large area waving a stake in the air and asking plaintively, “But, WHY can’t I stake him? This isn’t our Spike – and I sooo did not mean that the way it sounded!” he blurted when Giles raised a curious eyebrow at him. “This is evil, unchipped William the Bloody, before he has killed two Slayers. I’d be doing the world a favor.”

“Or,” Giles said mildly, continuing to go through the instruction manuals he’d found in a nearby desk, “you could change the world completely, including ensuring that our Buffy was never called.”

“Oh,” Xander said in a subdued voice. “I didn’t think about that.”

He turned to glare at the puzzled vampire and waved his stake for emphasis. “Don’t think that means we’re going to be best buds, Deadboy, Jr. One funny move....”

The vampire sneered in derision. “I don’t MAKE ‘funny moves’, you walking meal,” he snarled back. “Which you will find out the instant I get out of these irons.”

In the few days since Buffy and Spike had gone away, leaving the unchipped, nineteenth century version in their place, Xander and the vampire had fallen into the same sort of mutual insulting relationship that had existed between him and the “real” Spike, as he preferred to think of him.

While the younger man spent his time mocking the chained vampire for his accent and clothing, the Watcher had actually managed to have a few conversations with him and had reached some understanding of where and when Buffy and Spike had probably been sent. However, long days and nights of poring over the technical books he’d found had not given him the information he needed to go about bringing them back and his frustration was growing with every day they were missing.

“Hi, guys!” Willow’s perky voice echoed in the large open space as she and Tara walked up.

“Got your blood here, Sp- uh, William. Sorry I can’t warm it up, but...”

“That’s quite alright, Ms. Rosenberg,” the vamp’s face relaxed into a smile. “I quite appreciate it. Especially since the cretin won’t step close enough for me to have some of the real thing.”

He sent a glare in Xander’s direction, then turned his smile back on the two witches. One glimpse of what the two girls were capable of together, and he had quickly determined that it was in his best interests to be charming to them rather than threatening. He still shuddered slightly when he thought about the ball of fire they’d sent in his direction the first time he lunged at them. Since then, he’d gone out of his way to be polite and friendly – or as friendly as a fledgling vampire could be when surrounded by food sources he was unable to reach.

Willow smiled and poured the blood into a mug then walked closer to the vampire, halting just out of reach. Rolling his eyes in irritation, the younger version of Spike retreated to the other side of the pole he was chained to, following the protocol that had been worked out for feeding him. Giving him an apologetic smile, Willow quickly moved forward and deposited the mug on the floor where he could reach it. When she had scooted back out of arm’s reach, Spike swaggered back and picked up the mug.

“I’m not stupid enough to eat the person who feeds me, you know,” he grumbled as he sipped the pigs blood and made his usual face at it.

At Xander’s loud scoff, he grinned and admitted, “At least not while I remain chained up in this unpleasant place.”

Willow walked back over to where Giles was thumbing through the many manuals he’d found to ask, “Have you found anything that will help us get Buffy and Spike back yet?”

The older man shook his head and took off his glasses to rub his eyes wearily.

“No, my knowledge of technology is sadly lacking when it comes to the sort of physics that seems to be involved here. I think I may have narrowed down the number of manuals that apply to that device, but they are not clear about how one is to use it. I’m afraid we are not going to be able to do anything until Riley gets back in town.”

“Can I look at them?” Willow asked. Where a couple of years ago, she would have hesitated to question an adult, the confidence she’d gained through her relationship with Tara and their advancing skills with magic left her more than willing to show off her own knowledge of physics and technology and she reached eagerly for the books.

Giles started to frown at her, then remembered that the pretty redhead in front of him had almost perfect SATs and had been offered scholarships to several top universities as well as a post high school position with a major computer firm. He nodded his head and pushed the ones he’d identified as pertaining to the machine in her direction.

“By all means, Willow. Please see if you can decipher these and find some operating instructions. In the meantime, I will try to contact Riley and see if he can return sooner than expected.”

Leaving the books to the witches, he stretched and walked around the large area, finding his way back to the empty room into which his slayer and her vampire slaying partner had vanished. He was turning away when something caught his eye and he looked intently into the dark room struggling to see the glinting object. When he located it, he grabbed a nearby push broom and extended it into the room, hooking the object on the bristles and pulling it up the slippery metal floor until he could safely reach it.

When he realized what he was holding in his hand, he blanched and turned back to the computer expert at the desk.

“Willow,” he asked, holding out his hand, “what does this appear to be?”

“Um,” she glanced casually at his hand and then away, “it’s some kind of a chip, Giles. There are probably lots of them around here. What’s so special about this one?”

“The fact that I found it on the floor of the room where we last saw Spike and Buffy,” he said, closing his hand around it tightly.

“Oh, well, then, it’s probably just Spi—oh my God!” Her wide eyes flew to meet the watcher’s. “It’s probably Spike’s!”

Xander rushed to the desk to look at the innocuous looking piece of silicone and metal in Giles’ hand.

“Spike is chipless? Buffy is trapped somewhere with Spike and he can kill again? This is soooo not of the good,” he groaned.

“You don’t think he’ll...hurt...her, do you, Giles?” Willow asked anxiously. “I mean I know he’s evil and all that, but...it’s Buffy...and...Spike...and they...”

“They fight like cats and dogs, Will,” Xander said.

“He isn’t going to harm Buffy,” Giles said firmly. “I don’t believe that and neither do either of you.”

Willow and Tara nodded their heads, unable to disagree with the watcher’s assessment. They would have had to be blind not to recognize the tension between the two blonds that they channeled into their constant bickering and sarcasm.

“I don’t see how you can say that,” Xander began indignantly. “He’s a vampire, she’s the Slayer, they hate each other and they....” He gave in with a sigh. “Oh shit, who am I kidding? He won’t hurt her. I just hope she doesn’t stake him when she finds out.”

“What?” he blustered when Willow and Tara looked at him, smiling. “For Buffy’s sake! It’s not like I care if the bleached wonder never makes it back. I just don’t want Buffy to have to go through...”

His voice trailed off as he realized no one was listening to him anymore. He turned away muttering to himself about vampires and slayers and things that were never meant to be. When he saw the chained vamp looking at him with curiosity, he stopped muttering and really studied him.

“So, Deadboy, Jr.,” he said, moving a little closer to the wary vamp, “You’re still all about the evil insane one right now, huh?”

Spike snarled and glared at him. “If you are referring to my dark princess, she is everything to me. My salvation, the fount of my existence. I cannot imagine what could possibly have made me leave her side for this ‘Buffy’ person you seem to think the Spike you know would not kill if he could.”

“Well, probably that Chaos demon she—“

“Xander!” Giles’ voice thundered across the room and the boy jumped guiltily. The watcher had made it very clear that they were not to tell this younger version of Spike any more than they absolutely had to about where and when he was – and nothing about his future beyond what he could surmise from their original unguarded conversations about Spike and Buffy.

Giles was clinging to a faint hope that they could get Buffy and Spike back from where they were with a minimum of disruption to their time line, and sending Spike back ignorant of his future was an important part of that plan. They still had no idea if he had come from another dimension or from their own 19th century past and therefore no idea how or if his presence was going to change their own lives.

“What Chaos demon?” the vampire demanded, rising to his feet with his fists clenched. He always forgave Drusilla her infidelity with Angelus, knowing the sire/childe bond was one in which he should not interfere no matter how angry it made him. But to hear the irritating human imply that his ripe, wicked plum would be so cruel as to...

When Xander just shrugged and walked away, Spike sat back down telling himself the human was just looking for a way to provoke him. As much as he wanted to know more about his future, and the world he was in now, he was perfectly happy to leave that particular line of questioning completely alone.





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