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A month had gone by and the pain of losing Spike hadn't lessened for Buffy. Everyone was beginning to worry about her a lot more, but there was nothing they could do. At first they gave her the space she needed to grieve but the pain was consuming her. Her sister was sitting with her as she slept when Willow stepped in with a beaming smile. “Dawn, there’s someone downstairs for you,” she said, smiling as she looked at the slayer’s sleeping form.

Dawn looked up at the redheaded witch with a raised eyebrow. “What do you mean, someone for me?” she asked.

“Well, someone for both you and Buffy,” Willow said softly. “Someone who will help Buffy and you’ll really want to see him.”

Dawn’s eyes widened and she carefully rose from the bed before slipping out of the room.

Willow giggled softly before reaching out to wake Buffy. She hoped this would work. Buffy’s grief had been taking its toll on everyone and their guest downstairs would fix everything.

From the top of the stairs, Dawn could see Faith talking to someone with platinum blond hair and wearing a leather duster. It didn’t take her a second to realize who it was and she flew down the stairs, with a squeal of delight. She jumped into his arms, surprising him greatly.

“H’lo Nibblet,” Spike said, hugging her tightly.

Dawn squeezed his neck as he lifted her off the floor and spun her around once. “Oh, my God,” she whispered, her voice laced with shock. “I so knew that you wouldn’t leave us.”

Spike pulled back and smiled at her as he wiped her tears. “You should know by now that you can’t get rid of the Big Bad,” he said.

Dawn smiled and then remembered her sister. “Buffy is going to be so happy to see you,” she squealed with happiness.

“I hope so,” Spike said, chuckling. “Not hoping for her to be going for the nose or kicking me out on my arse.”

Upstairs, Buffy was sobbing in Willow’s arms. “Willow, I can’t anymore. He’s the only one who gave me the strength to go on. I love him so much and I don’t know how to live without him. What am I gonna do?”

“I don’t know,” Willow said. “But there is someone downstairs who could help you, might even be able to tempt you to start eating again.”

Willow gently helped Buffy out of bed and found clothes for her to put on. She was shocked to see how much weight Buffy had lost in such a short time. Taking her friend’s hand, she led her from the room.

Buffy paused at the top of the stairs, her eyes automatically drawn to the man talking with Dawn. The breath hitched in her chest as she grabbed Willow for support. Her heart was telling her it was Spike and her head was telling her it couldn’t be. She gasped softly as tears filled her eyes before continuing their journey down her face. Slowly, she descended the stairs, as if he would disappear if she moved too quickly. Her palms were sweaty and she could vaguely feel Willow behind her as she made it to the bottom of the stairs. What if he didn’t remember her? What if he didn’t love her? What if he had no soul? So many questions were swirling in her mind but she didn’t have time to sort them out.

Faith smiled and stood next to Willow as Buffy made her way to Spike. Dawn pulled away when she felt Spike stiffen a little. She looked up and saw her sister, a beaming smile on her face. Dawn smiled as well and reluctantly moved away from Spike, but not too far. She didn’t want to be between them, but she didn’t want to be away from him either.

Buffy took her sister’s place in Spike’s arms and pressed her lips against his without even thinking twice about what she was doing.

Spike hadn’t expected a kiss from her, but he wasn’t going to pass it up. His arms went around her tightly and he returned the kiss. Their tongues danced lovingly and tenderly. When she needed air they parted, but only by millimetresmillimeters. Buffy rested her forehead against his, not caring about anything else in the world. Her earlier worries about him not loving her didn’t matter anymore. She ran her fingers over his face, memorizing the sharp angles and the color of his eyes that she hadn’t seen in what felt like forever. There was so much she needed to say to him, but she had no idea how to start.

Spike nuzzled her fingers and smiled a little bit at her. What was he supposed to say to her? It had been a long time since he’d been speechless, but Buffy always had that effect on him. “Buffy?”

Buffy smiled back at him. “Sorry,” she said softly. “Just…indescribably happy that you’re here. I didn’t think I would ever see you again.”

Spike pulled her closer to him. “Well, I guess that makes us even then, huh?” he teased. “Couldn’t be out done by the Slayer, could I?”

Buffy smacked his chest playfully. “Well, let’s settle for a tie and not go for a winner,” she retorted.

Behind her someone coughed, and finally she came back to reality. She looked over her shoulder to find Faith, Willow and Dawn watching them, and smiled widely. Her happiness brought answering smiles to their faces.

“But…how?” she asked, turning back to Spike. She was overjoyed to have him back, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t confused.

“So not important. Right now, you and Spike should go upstairs and get everything sorted out. Go. Now,” Dawn ordered, pointing up the stairs.

Buffy took Spike’s hand and led him upstairs. They shut and locked the door before she was back in his arms. Without breaking their kiss, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the bed, reluctantly tearing his lips away from hers so she could breathe.

“I missed you so much,” Buffy whispered, running her fingers through his hair. “And I can’t wait to sleep in your arms again.”

“I missed you too, pet,” he said. “I love you, and you’re going to sleep so good tonight. Then tomorrow, I’ll make sure you have a big breakfast.”

“I love you, too.” She opened her eyes and pouted at him. “Are you trying to make me fat?”

Spike’s heart swelled as he heard those words and he smiled and kissed her again. “No, just healthy,” he said against her lips.

Buffy pulled away reluctantly. She needed answers about what happened between them. “Spike, why didn’t you believe me before?” she asked, with a quivering voice. She hadn’t told anyone what had happened in the Hellmouth during her last few moments with Spike. If she had, they probably would have been able to understand her pain. His rejection had crushed her and she didn’t understand why he wouldn’t believe her.

“I wanted to, but I don’t understand why you waited to tell me,” Spike said honestly, his heart tightening in his chest at the memory. He hoped to avoid this conversation for a little bit longer but Buffy had always messed up his plans. “I didn’t want you to just say that to me because I was dying.”

Buffy sat up in bed, and Spike sat up next to her. “I wanted to wait and tell you,” she said softly. “I didn’t think you were gonna die and when the battle was over I wanted us to have some real privacy and I was going to tell you."

“But I did die,” Spike said, sadly.

“Yeah, and I couldn’t leave without you knowing,” she said, looking into the blue eyes that were reading her like a book. “But I do love you,” she whispered. “I’m not sure what else you want. I just love you with all of my heart.”

Spike stared at her for a moment while running through his thoughts. He wanted more of an explanation from her, but if she didn’t have more at the moment, he was going to have to accept with that. “That’s enough,” he whispered. He hoped in the future they would be able to talk about what had happened between them those past few days on the Hellmouth; specifically Angel.

Buffy nodded and her hand reached out to cover his. “I know that I do love you and I don’t want to ever be without you again.”

“Never leaving you again. Promise,” he said, pulling her into his arms so they could fall asleep.





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