Author's Chapter Notes:
Surprise!!!!! I have good news and bad news. Bad news first.......I am not Cissi. Good news I am her beta and I have permission to update. Yay! Make sure you show her how much you appreciate this by reviewing. I also know we are evil by making you think you'll have to wait but here is your reward for being patient.
Chapter 11 - About her

“It’s just… One thing…” She mumbled, while she took a step back. “About… About Drusilla. What’s her story?”

Spike nodded, understanding that she wanted to know about his crazy ex of a girlfriend and as much as he wanted to just forget about her – he couldn’t. He made an attempt to sit down on the hood of the car once again and Buffy followed his motions.

“I felt that I need to know about her, but if you’re not comfortable with it I understand.”

Spike shook his head and gave her a weak smile. “It’s alright, and since you had the misfortune to meet her a few days ago I think it’s only right to let you know.” He stopped for a few seconds, gathering his thoughts and thinking of a way to tell her this. “Me and Dru… we go way back in time. We went to the same high school, she moved here from London during our second year. I remember the first time I saw her outside the school with her friends, her long black hair being the first thing to draw my attention to her and then she turned around. Those eyes met mine and I fell head over heels in love with her…”

Spike stopped to let out a heavy sigh. “I was a fool, I know,” he stated. “But back then I was William.” He said his name with a slight disgust. “William the bad poet, William with his geeky clothes… I didn’t have any friends; no one wanted to be near me. I was used to it, and when I saw I realized that she was out of my league, I wasn’t worthy. And, besides, I still had my obsession for a girl called Cecily who I loved more than anything, well; at least I thought I loved her. I wrote her poetry once but I made a fool out of myself… She showed it to her friends and they started calling me William the Bloody because of my bad poetry and I was heartbroken. At a party, just before our last year, I sneaked inside and there she was. I was stupid enough to declare my love for her and she just… laughed right in my face along with everyone.”

Buffy could only imagine the horrible incident. Even though it was such a long time ago, she saw in his pained face that it had hurt him more than she had thought from the beginning.

Spike turned to look at her from his spot on the car. “I didn’t leave right the way which I probably should’ve done to avoid all the coming years but done is done. Anyway, instead I got really drunk. I had never touched alcohol before so I didn’t know how much I could take and I got really wasted. Ended up in a bloody wardrobe,” he scoffed. “That was only minutes before I met her… Drusilla, as I struggled out into one of the bedrooms. I hadn’t spoken to Drusilla, not even once and I was stunned when she closed the door and moved towards me, telling me that she had seen my true self.”

“Uh… What are you talking about D-Drusilla?” He slightly slurred, trying to make the room stop spinning.

Drusilla grinned and continued to move forward. “You know… I’ve seen you, my dark prince. At night… inside my head,” she said, tilting her head and moving her hands up to her temple. Something about her made him cringe and he swallowed. “Miss Edith told me you’d be here,” she continued. “She told me, that tonight my sweet William would give up the silly girl downstairs.”

“Who?” William stuttered. “Cecily?”

“That’s her. She also showed me the real William, the one who’s hiding behind your skin.” As she said the last sentence, she carefully touched his arm and let her fingers slowly move up to his shoulder, moving over his throat to his cheek. “Miss Edith said I’d bring him out.”

“W-who’s Miss Edith?”

“I believe you’ll meet her… eventually”, she added with a smirk. “Do you want me to show you the real you, William? I could show you things; teach you to appreciate this world... You’ll be mine, William.”

William swallowed for what felt like the hundredth time in just a few minutes. “Yours?”

“Mine,” she stated as she moved forward and crashed her lips against his.


“Um… I think I’ll stop that event there…” Spike slightly smiled, a bit embarrassed and Buffy returned the smile. “Anyway, after that everything changed. Just a few days after I bleached my hair, threw away all of my old clothes… Bought the leather duster and combat boots. For the first time in so long I was happy, and Drusilla I was madly in love with Drusilla. She brought me out; she made me who I am today… For better or worse, you decide,” he added.

“We started school and I hung out with her friends and all of a sudden everyone respected me. When we finished school I was known as Spike and well… I’ve kept it.”

“What happened after you graduated?” Buffy asked. “Did you two… date?”

“We did,” Spike nodded. “And we continued after graduation too. None of us went to college and we spent a lot of time together until I got a job and moved out of my parent’s house. We were together, believe it or not, until almost two years ago. The last year of our relationship wasn’t good. Her dad has a lot of money which he gave to her so she didn’t have to work. I was gone a lot, worked at a bar in a town nearby and one night when I came home I found her in bed with some guy.”

Buffy opened and closed her mouth, trying to find the right words but all she found was an ‘oh’.

“Yeah, I know. For what felt like minutes I just stood there until she noticed me and turned her head, still not moving away from the guy beneath her and smiled. She smiled!” Spike said, disgusted. “Then she asked me to join them and that was when I snapped out of my trance and almost broke every available object in the house.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Buffy told him sincerely.

“I moved out a few days later, much to Dru’s surprise. I still can’t believe she thought I’d stay after that. We had an argument and suddenly secrets were reviled… Apparently she hadn’t been faithful for a long time; she’d been with a lot of men during the past year and even before that. Just when I was about to walk out the door she exclaimed;

“I’m pregnant,” she said.

Spike stopped in the doorway, the bag still in his hand as he slowly turned around. “You’re…”

“Yes, and you think you can just walk out like that, huh? I know you would never turn your back on your family, Spike,” she smirked. “You won’t do that now either.”

“Is it even mine?” He asked, his voice choked as her grin faltered.

“Why would you think it’s not?” That made Spike laugh out miserably.

“Yeah, why would I think that Drusilla?” He replied, sarcastically. “Maybe because you’ve been screwing with practically the whole bloody town!”

“Well just see about that won’t we,” Drusilla said. “But it is a big chance, Spike, that this baby is yours and you won’t turn your back on it.”

“I-I…” He started but trailed off, swallowing hard. “I don’t know… I need to think, I –“

“Think all you want, William. I know what you’re gonna do…” Drusilla interrupted him with a smirk.


“Oh my god,” Buffy whispered. “I had no idea…” Spike nodded and mumbled a ‘yeah’. “Did you… W-was it yours?”

A sudden pained expression appeared on Spike face and he tilted his head to face her. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Buffy asked, confused and he shook his head.

“I returned two days later. I had been thinking about the whole situation and decided that no matter how much I hated Drusilla for what she had done I couldn’t abandon the child that was possibly mine. But when I returned… Guess who was in our old bedroom once again with a new man? I got mad, mostly because I was afraid she was hurting the baby and not because it hurt. Weirdly enough, it didn’t… But as it turned out, she had gotten rid of it just the day before. I never got to know,” he trailed off, looking at his hands. Buffy reached for one and squeezed it gently.

“I’m so, so sorry you had to go through that. She’s a sick twisted woman, mind me for saying that.”

“She is,” Spike said. “I tried to get her to a shrink a few times, she just kept talking about how the stars and that bloody little doll Miss Edith wanted her to do different things. It was after that all the things started to go wrong…”

“I know it won’t make any difference, Spike, but I really am sorry…”

“Thanks, luv,” he replied, giving her a smile and sighed. “You think we could drop the subject for a little while? I’m feeling kind of drained…”

“Of course,” Buffy replied. “Thank you for telling me this, I appreciate that you trust me enough to share it with me.”

“I do… Trust you, I mean,” he said.

Buffy felt her heart skip a beat at the statement and she let a genuine smile grace her lips before breaking eye contact with him. She felt that if she didn’t move right now things would end up bad…

“Not that I want to ruin this moment,” Buffy stuttered with a weak smile, “but didn’t we have a girl to visit?”

“Oh, shit! Yes we have, I forgot,” Spike exclaimed and put a hand on his forehead. “Come on, let’s go before it’s too dark.”





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