chapter 7



Suddenly Spike's face broke out in a huge smile. "Who am I, you ask?" Then, risking a look over at Buffy, who didn't seem ready to object, he answered, "I'm your daddy."

In the true resilience of children, Blake looked at Spike, blinked a few times, smiled, then laid his head against Spike's chest, telling him he was "seepy, Daddy".

Spike looked at Buffy helplessly, not sure what he should do, and found her with a strange look on her face. Unable to interpret it, he just gathered Blake closer as he breathed his scent in deeply as if to forever etch it in his mind. Since he had found out that Buffy had gotten pregnant that night, he hadn't given much thought to the actual child that had resulted. He had mostly insisted on seeing him because he knew it was yet one more thing that would get Buffy brassed off, and for some reason, he felt a strong urge to do just that. And often. He also liked making her Watcher nervous, that was turning into good fun. But now? Now that he was actually holding his living breathing flesh and blood in his arms... the feeling was indescribable. This child was a part of him, it had come from him. The resemblance was uncanny, and Spike could feel his demon retreating and a sense of calmness stealing over him. He knew they were watching him, yet he didn't care, standing there holding HIS son was the only thing important at the moment. So there they stood, a creature dressed in black, cradling a child gently in his arms, belying the evil and violence that was housed behind the misleading facade.

Giles relaxed his hold on the stake he had in his hand and motioned to Buffy that he was going downstairs. She nodded, her face looking oddly touched by the scene in front of her. Joyce followed Giles from the room, intent on getting some answers. Seeing Spike's reaction to Blake helped set her mind at ease that her grandson was not in danger from him and only hoped that Buffy saw that as well.

Going into the kitchen to make tea, Joyce turned to Giles and asked, "So, care to fill me in on what I missed?"

Giles gave a tired sigh. "Well, I'll tell you what I know. First off, my deepest apologies for keeping the uh.. status of Blake's father from you. It was not my intentions to deceive you."

"Yet you did, for 2 years."

"You are correct we did. At the time, that was Buffy's wish. I believe she was trying to repress the events surrounding the uh..conception."

At his comment, it finally dawned on Joyce that the man upstairs was the one responsible for her little girl's profound misery and torment two years ago and her resolve hardened. Well, she had a few choice words to say to him on that little matter. Nobody hurt her little girl and got away with it.

"He raped her."

Giles got an uncomfortable look on his face. "I was not given all the details regarding the uh, conception. I am afraid I am not in a position to answer that question accurately."

Joyce heard footsteps come down the stairs and went to intercept those who WERE in the position to answer her question. Her resolve softened a little when she saw Spike sitting on the couch, Blake sound asleep in his arms. Buffy sat not too far off, still prepared to come in snatch her young from the big evil monster, if the situation arose.

Both of them looked up when Joyce entered the room, the hard set of her face impossible to miss. "Mom?" Buffy asked in bewilderment, wondering what had her mom all bent.

Joyce pinned her hard look on Spike and announced coldly, "You raped my little girl."

The look of astonishment on Spike's face was almost comical, then he turned and glared at Buffy. "You told them that?"

Buffy squirmed a bit under the intense scrutiny she was under, then rallied back. "No, not exactly." At the growl that came from Spike, Buffy looked worriedly at Blake, getting ready to get him away from Spike.

"I'm not going to bloody hurt him, so stop looking at me like that," Spike snarled. "I would appreciate it though, if you could tell your mum the truth."

Flopping herself back against the cushion, Buffy sighed. "Fine." She snapped. "He didn't rape me." Then added, "exactly."

In a dangerous voice, Spike replied," You were ready and willing, Buffy, or did you conveniently forget that part?"

Buffy's cheeks flushed a bright red, and she took a mortifying glance over at her mom. The confusion there was in high evidence, but her mom also looked...relieved?

"I'm waiting for an honest answer here, Buffy," Spike announced, his voice still hard and dangerous. His eyes were cold, yet Buffy could see his hands were gentle as they held Blake.

"I didn't forget," Buffy replied. "But I was referring to the END." She couldn't help the shiver that went down her spine as unbidden memories came crashing through her. Frantically, she once again pushed them away.

Spike could smell the panic flowing from her, and a bit of the coldness left his face. "I won't apologize for that, because well, I just wouldn't mean it. But I'll apologize for scaring you."

Buffy looked at him curiously, realizing that he actually meant it. Forgetting that her mom and Watcher were in the room, Buffy sucked it in to ask him a question that had weighed heavily on her ever since that night. "Why did you get so nasty when...uh.. you weren't before?"

Spike smirked at her, and Buffy immediately wished she could have bitten back her words. She was an idiot if she thought she could have anything resembling a normal conversation with him. "Cos, luv, you gave my demon something it craves, the taste of fear."

"So, you're trying to tell me it was MY fault you were trying to kill me?" Buffy asked him, her eyes wide and incredulous.

Spike shrugged his shoulders indifferently as best he could with a child laying on his chest. "Wasn't planning on killin' ya."

Buffy snorted indelicately. "Yeah right. That's why when I knocked you out, you had your fangs buried in my throat."

A bored look on his face, Spike looked down at his son. "Think what you want. Wasn't planning on killing ya."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Please."

Giles interrupted the squabble, fearing the tentative truce the two had established upstairs in their son's room had come to an end. "Buffy, for the sake of argument, I am inclined to believe Spike on this matter."

"What????!!! Giles!" Buffy didn't even want to look at Spike's gloating face.

"Buffy, I don't know what went on that night, and quite frankly, I don't care to know the intimate details. However, for the sake of preventing yet another argument that is sure to impound my already colossal size headache, the facts do speak for themselves."

Unable to help himself, Spike arrogantly looked at the girl sitting stiffly by his side. "Yeah, Buffy, so listen up."

A crack showed in Giles tightly held British reserve as he let loose on the vampire. "Spike, we would all appreciate it if you could stop baiting Buffy. And Buffy, would you please stop falling for it every time? God lord, you two act like a couple of two year olds!"

An offended look crossed Spike's face. " Eh, watch it. 128 here."

"Oh god!" Buffy cried, throwing her head back against the cushion. Gee, only a 110 year age difference. She looked over at her mom, who had a pained expression on her face. Feeling a stab of guilt, Buffy realized her less than stellar behavior probably wasn't helping matters here. Making a mental decision to try not to react so much to Spike's taunting, she plastered a phony smile on her face and gestured for Giles to continue. Actually, she found herself curious to see how Giles had reached the conclusion he had, when she had felt it in her gut that Spike hadn't been intending to kill her that night. She found herself desperately wanting to believe that and really wanted to find out if she was right. Of course, she could just ask Spike, but she was also afraid of his answer.

Slightly placated by Buffy's apparent willingness to behave, Giles sat down on the other couch. "All right then. As far as my research has led me to believe, vampires don't usually claim victims they intend to kill. Is this correct, Spike?"

Spike's indifferent mask had been drawn firmly over his sharp features, making him seem far colder than the awed vampire that had beheld his son in stunned wonder. But Giles was beginning to see through Spike and cringed at that realization. He had wanted to keep Spike in the category of "bad", but the vampire was slowly worming himself out of it, inching towards "not entirely bad." And Giles wasn't quite sure what that meant.

"Yeah, Watcher, that's correct," Spike replied in a flat voice, keeping his gaze downcast and focused on his sleeping son.

"What are you talking about?" Joyce asked, highly annoyed once again at finding out another aspect she wasn't told about.

Giles realized that it was up to him to explain, when he took in the tight lipped faces of the two on the couch. He did catch the dirty look Buffy threw in the vampire's direction but didn't call her on it, as he figured Spike more than deserved it. Taking his glasses off and using his handkerchief to polish the lenses, he replied, "It appears that Spike placed a vampiric claim on Buffy two years ago. It's usually done between two vampires, to keep tabs on the other, but occasionally a vampire will claim a human, that uh.. takes his or her fancy."

Buffy was glad that her mom's lethal look was directed at Spike and not her as her mom asked, "And why did you do that?"

Spike's indifferent mask couldn't hold up under the wrath of Mom and he mumbled, "Dunno. Just liked the girl."

"And just what were your intentions after?"

"Vampire here, Joyce. Didn't have much in the way of intentions. Just knew I wasn't planning on killing her right away."

"Oh gee, and that just makes me feel SO much better." Buffy announced rudely, forgetting her reminder to herself to watch her mouth. Her question had been answered, but surprisingly, she didn't feel very comforted by it.

"What are you going on about? You clocked me over the head with a telephone, knocked me out. If I recall correctly, before you got all panicky, you didn't suffer too badly at my hands, now did you?"

The change in body temperature and the sudden rush of color to her cheeks was the only answer he needed. Clenching her jaw, Buffy retorted hotly, "That's so not the point. The point is, you placed a claim on me without asking. You come here and start telling me that I belong to you, and it's just....WRONG!" Buffy cursed the tears that crowded her eye as familiar feelings of helplessness possessed her.

Spike took an unnecessary deep breath to calm himself. He looked over at Buffy and let his features soften so she could read the honesty on his face. "Look, pet. You and me, we have a few things to suss out between us, ok? I know things have gone a bit rough for you, but I can't change that now. And I know you probably just as soon stake me than take a chance, but what do you say we try and not kill each other for now?"

Buffy stared at him in shock then saw he was serious. She found herself nodding. "Fine."

Giles and Joyce shared a relieved look, both wondering why they were even supporting this. Joyce was as fiercely protective of Blake as her daughter was, yet she was allowing an apparently evil vampire into his life. Into their lives. Wait, Joyce corrected. Not just any evil vampire. Blake's father. Her mind was a bit more at ease with Spike now at the admission that the events that led up to his conception hadn't involved forced sex then cringed at the visual imagery that evoked. She could see Buffy and Spike studiously ignoring the other on the couch now and suddenly she was exhausted.

"Well, now that we've got that out of the way, maybe we can think about getting some sleep. Spike, you can sleep on the couch." She felt satisfaction that she had managed to shock him as his head jerked up and he looked at her with surprise. She ignored Giles and Buffy's identical looks of shock.

"Thank you, Joyce." She nodded, and stood up with the linen cabinet as her destination. She grabbed some blankets and brought them back to Spike. "Mr. Giles, I'll walk you to the door."

Giles, knowing he was being dismissed, nodded at Buffy's mother and bid them a goodnight. He sent a warning look in Spike's direction, which surprisingly, Spike didn't react to, just tipped his head in a curt nod of acknowledgement. After he had left and Joyce had gone upstairs, both Spike and Buffy sat staring at the boy sleeping against Spike's chest.

"Want me to take him?" Buffy asked, breaking the silence.

Spike just shook his head, finding himself feeling strangely....awkward, something he wasn't used to feeling. "Tell me about him," he asked quietly, stroking Blake's hair gently, a small smile playing across his lips when the toddler squirmed in his sleep.

Realizing that for Spike- this was reaching out, Buffy obliged him without any snide comments. "He's my life," she replied simply. Spike looked over at her, his intense eyes catching hers and Buffy felt that weird feeling deep in the pit of her stomach again, the one that had drawn her that night in Vegas. The one that caused her to give her virginity to this man sitting next to her. Then Buffy asked a question that had been bothering her, realizing that Spike could probably answer it. "He is... human, right?"

Spike nodded. "Yeah, he is. Smells human anyway. You haven't noticed anything, have you?"

Buffy shook her head. "No, not really. Sometimes, he looks at me a certain way and I think there's something, but other than that, no. He's super smart, and he's always been really good. Like freakishly good."

"You complaining about that?" Buffy realized Spike was teasing her, and felt herself relax a bit.

"Me? Nooo... No complaints here." Buffy reached out to fluff her son's hair, her hand brushing against Spike's accidentally. Buffy jerked her hand back so hard at the unexpected contact and almost smacked herself in the process.

"Still as spastic as ever, I see," Spike commented dryly.

Buffy glared at him in reply, then couldn't help the smile that stole over her face. She was suddenly reminded of exactly what had attracted her to Spike in the first place, and it wasn't just his undeniably gorgeous face. For some reason, they had clicked. And maybe someone else thought so, because hello, vampires weren't supposed to be able to give 16 year old girls the cutest babies they could ever hope for.

"So, you really weren't going to kill me?" Buffy shocked Spike by asking.

"Nah, wasn't planning on it that night."

"Well, that's reassuring." A comfortable silence followed before Buffy asked, "Why did you want to keep me?"

Spike took a moment before answering. "Cos I wasn't bored when I was with you."

"And you... often have a problem with boredom?"

"Hell yeah."

"So, uh, how come you didn't try to find me, if you considered me your property and all?"

"Who says I didn't?"

Buffy blinked in shock. "Oh."

"Yeah, it was hell. I was bored again."

Buffy took a second before asking, "So, uh, are you bored now?"

Spike turned his head to look at her and gave her a wry smile. "Nope."

Buffy didn't know why his response pleased her, but it did. God, she was so whacked. Here she was, sitting on her mom's couch having a civil conversation with a notoriously evil vampire, who also happened to have traumatized her probably for life, even if it hadn't technically been rape and yet she was happy because he wasn't bored in her company. How lame was that? Thank god her mom and Giles already knew about this, they'd probably die of shock or something.

"What about you?" Spike asked.

"Huh? What about me what?"

"You bored?"

"Oh. Uh, well..no," Buffy admitted.

"Well, guess that's a start then."





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