There’s No Place Like Sunnydale
“What are we looking for again?”
“Proof.”
“Proof that this world is fake and all in your head?” James was having a hard time wrapping his head around this.
“Yep.” And she seemed so serious about it. But as insane as it sounded he loved this woman and would do anything she wanted him to do. Like following her to a magic shop to look for a potion.
“And you think we’re going to find that proof here?”
“I’m hoping.” They were looking through some of the books in the shop.
“Where would you find information on other worlds?”
“Hell if I know. Research was never my thing.” He smiled slightly. Ally approached them with more books in her hands.
“Here are some more books to look through. They might be helpful.”
“Thanks,” Buffy replied. The red headed girl wasn’t too sure about Buffy. She was convinced that she could find a real spell in one of these books that would send her back to her “real” world. She had also told her that in this “real” world there had been someone who looked exactly like her, but was named Willow. Strange? Yes. But there was something about her that made Ally trust her. She just couldn’t figure out exactly what it was. Her eyes went to the couple and she watched James elbow Buffy slightly. The girl returned it a bit harder. They smiled at each other and went back to reading. Ally decided to ask a question that had been on her mind.
“So are you guys like a couple or something?” They looked at her and then at each other, neither really knowing the answer to that question.
“Why do you ask?” Buffy said.
“I saw you at the Bronze a couple of weeks ago. You were making out near the bathrooms.”
“Oh.”
“And I had seen you dancing with that other guy, the one you brought in here the other day, so I wasn’t sure what was going on,” she told Buffy.
“Yeah that was…something I should have never done.” Hurting Nick had been one of the worst things about their whole situation. Ally nodded sensing that the girl didn’t want to talk about it anymore.
“Well I’m gonna go look for some more books,” she said leaving the two alone once again.
“So you really think this is all in your head?” he asked her after a minute.
“I…I don’t know James. I mean sometimes it seems so real, but then sometimes…” She felt a hand on hers and tried to smile. If she did find a way to prove this world wasn’t real she would have to leave him. And now that everyone knew about them they could be together. No more secrets. ‘But,’ her mind kept reminding her, ‘this isn’t real.’
“Earth to Buffy.” She glanced at James.
“What?”
“I said I think I found something.” She looked down at the book he had, and read over the page. He was right. It was a spell for returning someone to where they belong. How fitting.
“This just might work,” Buffy said.
“What might work?” the red headed girl asked setting down the most recent handful of books she was carrying.
“This spell.” Buffy pointed to the page.
Ally picked up the book.
“I think we have all of these ingredients here.”
“Good. That means we can do this tonight.”
“Tonight?” James asked. “You wanna do this tonight?”
“The sooner I find out if this world is real or not, the sooner I can move on with my life.” She had a point. He was ready to move passed all of this craziness and try to have a normal relationship with her.
“Do you think you can do it?” Buffy asked Ally.
“Me? I don’t know. I’ve never tried to do real magic.”
“Well your counterpart in my world can. She’s like super-witch. So I’m sure if this is in my head then you can too.” The girl nodded warily.
“I’ll try.”
“Thanks.” Ally shrugged.
“I’ll see if I can find these ingredients.” She walked towards the shelves of assorted items in search of what she needed.
“Are you sure about this?” James asked Buffy.
“I’m sure.” Even though to be perfectly honest she wasn’t. She was sure this world was not the real world, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to leave it. Here she could be normal and maybe even get to live happily ever after. But she couldn’t abandon Willow, Xander, and Dawn…especially Dawn.
“And if it doesn’t work?”
“It will.”
“But if it doesn’t…can we let it go and try to salvage our lives here? I still want to be with you.” The look on his face was enough to make her say yes even though a part of her knew that she would never be able to let this go. His reply was a kiss.
“When are we going to do this?” Ally asked pulling the couple out of their moment. She had returned with a few things and set them on the table.
“Soon,” Buffy replied. “There are a few things I need to do first.” She nodded.
“I’ll try to get everything ready,” she said, “but I’ve never done anything like this before.”
“Okay. I’ll be back soon.” Buffy and James walked out the door.
“So where are we going?” James asked.
“I want to go see my mom.” They got into his car and drove to Buffy’s house.
“Do you want me to pick you up in a few?” he asked. She took a breath, not knowing how to tell him this.
“Listen James…I…you can’t be there.”
“Why the hell not?”
“It would just be too hard.”
“Buffy…”
“Please. Please. Look, if it doesn’t work I’ll come find you. I promise. But I can’t have you here.” He didn’t seem too happy about it, but nodded. If she didn’t want him here he needed to respect her wishes. “Thank you.” She leaned over and kissed him for what would possibly be the last time. When she finally pulled away she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered in his ear.
“I’ll miss you.” Before he had a chance to reply she pulled away and got out of the car. Looking back wouldn’t be good. When she stepped inside the house her stomach dropped. Her mother was sitting on the couch watching something on TV. The older woman looked up as Buffy came in the room.
“Hey honey. You have fun tonight?”
“Yeah…uhh…I need to talk to you mom.”
“What is it sweetheart?” She motioned for her daughter to sit on the couch beside her. Buffy sat down and took a deep breath. This was going to be one of the hardest things she would ever have to do.
“I just want you to know that I love you.”
“I love you too honey.” Buffy smiled slightly though her eyes had begun to fill up with tears.
Not knowing what else to say, “I’m not crazy.”
“What?” Joyce asked confused.
“I’m not crazy.”
“Well no one said you were dear.” She was becoming more and more worried about her daughter.
“You have to understand. It’s not real.”
“What’s not real?”
“This. This house, this town, these people, all of it. It’s not real. It’s in my head. It’s been in my head the whole time. I just wanted to believe it so badly that I didn’t see what was right in front of my face.”
“Buffy, honey you’re starting to scare me.” Buffy looked at her mother with sad eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? You have nothing to be sorry for.” But she did. She had a lot to be sorry for. It was time to stop pretending. It was time to make things right. Buffy hugged the older woman.
“Tell daddy I love him,” she whispered. And with that she let go of Joyce and started backing away.
“I love you mom, but I have to go.” And she knew what that meant. She had heard it many times before.
“Buffy no.”
“I have to.” Joyce reached for her.
“No baby please. Stay with me.” Buffy shook her head and without another word turned and ran out the front door. She could feel the tears sliding down her face as she ran, but she couldn’t turn back now. She had to get home. Her real home. She stopped running when she reached the magic shop. It was now or never.
She started to open the door when she heard a voice behind her.
“Buffy.” It was James. ‘Not now,’ Buffy thought. She couldn’t face him too. “Buffy.” His hand on her arm forced her to look at him.
“I told you not to come.”
“I know you did, but you didn’t really expect me to listen did you?” No, of course she hadn’t expected him to listen, but she had hoped that he would.
“I can’t do this right now, I have to go.”
“You can’t. I can’t let you do this.” He pulled her closer. “I love you Buffy, more than anything. These last couple of months have been the best of my life. I’ve never known anyone like you, and I know I may not be the best guy in the world, and I know that I made you lie about us and I’m sorry about that. But we don’t have to lie anymore. We can be together.” Tears had returned to her eyes. She shook her head.
“No. I have to go. This isn’t real.”
“Yes it is. It’s so real.”
“No…” she turned her head away from him and he forced her to look at him.
“Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me.” And she couldn’t. Because it would be a lie.
“Please don’t make this harder.” Last time she’d said those words, the man she’d been speaking to had not listened. And a part of her was hoping that this one would not either.
“How am I just supposed to sit back and watch the woman I love do something like this? What if it does work? Then I will never see you again.” The more he’d thought about it the more convinced he’d become that it was in fact possible. And if it were he did not want to lose the only thing that made any sense to him.
“I…I don’t know. But you have to let me go.” He put his forehead to hers.
“Please Buffy. Don’t do this.” She was steadily crying now and he pressed his lips to hers. She kissed him back for a moment before pulling away.
“I do love you, but you’re not real.”
“Yes I am. Feel me. I’m real.” He brought her hand to his chest. “You feel that. That’s my heart…pounding because I’m afraid of losing you.” She shook her head and pulled her hand back stepping away from him.
“I’m sorry.” She turned and ran into the shop closing and locking the door behind her. She couldn’t look at him anymore. She just had to keep telling herself that he wasn’t real.
Ally was sitting at one of the tables in the shop. She had gotten everything set up and was looking through one of the books.
“Hey Buffy,” the girl said looking up from the book.
“Hey.” Ally noticed the tears on her cheeks.
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said wiping the tears from her face. “Let’s do this.” She needed to get this done before she changed her mind. She heard knocking on the door, but told Ally to ignore it.
“Okay, but Buffy, I’m not sure this is going to work. I’m not a real witch you know.”
“You can do this. I know you can. If you’re anything like Willow you have the power inside of you.” This gave the girl a bit of confidence even though she didn’t like how much Buffy seemed to be counting on her to make this work. She’d never really even attempted to cast a real spell before and now she was trying to send someone back to her own world. “I just hope my pronunciation is in the ballpark.”
Buffy moved to the center of the room and steadied herself as Ally began to chant the words from the page. After a moment a bright light formed in front of her and she paused staring wide-eyed at the sight. Buffy nodded for her to continue and she swallowed before picking up where she left off. The light got bigger and brighter and eventually Buffy had to shield her eyes. She felt a strange sensation and then…nothing.
-------------------------------
Buffy blinked as she opened her eyes. The bright light was gone, and was replaced by sunlight. It took a moment for her eyes to adjust, but when they finally did she noticed that she was lying on a bed. She looked around to see that she was in her room…in her house…in Sunnydale. She smiled. Home sweet home. Her gaze then went to the door as it opened and her sister walked in.
“I know Janice, but she’s so stupid. You know she did the same thing last year with that Tommy guy.” Buffy smiled at her gossiping. “She’s really just a slut. I can’t believe…” she broke off when she saw that Buffy was sitting up in the bed. The phone fell to the floor.
“Buffy, you’re awake,” Dawn exclaimed.
“Yeah.” The younger girl ran over and hugged her sister.
“I was afraid you weren’t gonna wake up.” Buffy hugged her back and felt herself tearing up a little bit. How could she have ever believed this world wasn’t real?
“How long was I out?”
“A few weeks.” Buffy nodded glad that it hadn’t been longer. Dawn pulled back and Buffy noticed the tears on her face.
“I’m sorry Dawnie. I’m so sorry.” She couldn’t hold her own tears back any longer.
“It’s okay. You’re back now and that’s all that matters.”
‘Yes,’ Buffy thought, ‘I’m back, and I’ll never leave again.’
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Author's Chapter Notes:
only one more chapter after this one...should be up later this week...