[Reviews - 56]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Microsoft Word Chapter or Story | ePub eBook Chapter or Story | Printer Chapter or Story

Has been viewed 2102 times

- Text Size +




Author's Chapter Notes:
well here is the last chapter...thanks to everyone who read and reviewed...
Living


“I’m sorry.”

“How many times am I going to have to ask you not to apologize? It’s not your fault. You were under a spell,” Willow reminded her.

“But I should have been able to see through it.”

“You did.”

“But not before all of you were almost killed by a demon.”

“It’s not like it’s the first time that’s happened.” Buffy knew Willow was trying to make light of the situation, but it didn’t make her feel any better. She had been unconscious for weeks and in the meantime her friends had had to take over her duties for her.

“Yeah. But I should have been here for you guys, not off gallivanting around with imaginary people.” Her mind drifted to James. That was one of the hard parts about leaving that world behind. James and her mother.

“We’re just glad your back.” The gang had tried everything they could think of to try to bring Buffy back. They had even sent Giles into her head once to try to reach her, but had no luck. The only person he had been able to talk to was Buffy’s make-believe version of Spike. According to Giles he had looked the same, but had been American and human. And also in a rock band. Willow considered questioning Buffy about that, but figured she would at least wait until the initial shock wore off.

“Me too. Stupid nerds. They are so gonna pay for this.”

“We’ve been keeping tabs on them the last few weeks. They don’t seem to be up to anything too bad as of right now.”

“Don’t underestimate them. They’re diabolical losers with lots of gadgets and nothing better to do than torment me.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it. I sort of cast a little spell on them.”

“Oh you did, did you?”

“Don’t worry. It’s nothing much. Just a little confusion spell.” Buffy wasn’t sure exactly what that meant but she was just happy knowing they would be off of her back for a little while. Buffy sat back on the couch while Willow continued to fold clothes.

“So what I saw, it was all in my head? Cause let me just say, some of the things that happened were a little crazy.”

“Well it shouldn’t have been all that abnormal. I did some research on the demon that infected you. The poison makes you see what you want to see.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, everything that happened were ideas you already had in your head. Things you wanted.”

“You’re saying I wanted to be friends with Darla and Dru? And that I wanted Dawn to be Tara’s sister and not mine?”

“Maybe on some level you wished you could have gotten along with them, and your mind turned that into friendship. And as for the Dawn thing, maybe you just thought she would be safer if she wasn’t your sister.”

“Well that makes sense I guess,” Buffy said. Then something popped into her head. Something rather terrifying.

“So if I loved someone in that world, what would that mean?”

“Probably that you have some subconscious desire to be with them, to love them in this world. Why who was it?”

“No one. It was just hypothetical.” Willow wasn’t sure if she believed that, but decided to let it go. If Buffy wanted to talk about it, she would.

“I uhh…I need to…patrol. I’m feeling kind of restless.”

“Okay. Well I’m going out tonight. Xander wants me to go with him to see the midnight showing of Scooby Doo. Mostly he just thinks Daphne’s hott.”

“Really? I don’t think she’s that hott.”

“Me neither, but I promised I would go so…You’re welcome to come with.”

“No thanks. I’d rather deal with real monsters.”

“And coming from anyone else that would be an odd statement.” Buffy smiled at her friend. She really was glad to be back home.

“Well I’ll see you later Wil.”

“Have fun killing things.”
------------------------------

How awkward was this? Going to a crypt to find a vampire and tell him you might be in love with him. Only in Sunnydale. And only if you were a vampire slayer who forgot to read the handbook. She had almost decided not to come, but her time in the other world had taught her that being afraid of love was pointless. So even if he was dead and didn’t have soul, he could still be a good guy right? Buffy had convinced herself that maybe he could, and that none of that other stuff mattered. She would tell him how she felt.

She approached the crypt door and reached her hand up to knock. What if he wasn’t home? What if he was home and didn’t want to see her? What if…

Before she had time to finish her thought the door to the crypt opened and she was met by a slightly confused vampire. Of course he would know she was there.

“Buffy…” he said.

“Spike,” she replied putting her knocking hand down.

“Is there something I can do for you?” He sounded casual, like nothing was bothering him. Although on the inside he was a whole mix of emotion. Happiness, anger, confusion, hopefulness, love…He hadn’t seen her since she’d woken up. He had considered dropping by, but figured she wouldn’t want to see him.

“Umm…I was hoping we could talk.” He studied her for a moment before stepping aside to let her in. He shut the door behind him and stood waiting for her to make the next move. She turned around to face him, and he noticed that she was playing with her hands. He wondered what this was all about. When she didn’t say anything, he decided to get something off of his mind. Something that could very well explain why she was here.

“I’m sorry…for trying to pressure you into telling them about us. I guess I thought if they knew and didn’t care then neither would you.” She seemed surprised at his words, and she was. She hadn’t expected him to say anything. At least not before she’d said what she had come to say.

“It’s okay. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry too.” Off of his look she added, “I’ve treated you worse than I’ve ever treated anyone and yet you’re the one who stayed.”

“When you love someone, you don’t just walk away.”

“Tell that to Angel and Riley.” It was true. Out of all of the men she’d ever been in a relationship with, Spike had been the only one to stick around, even when she told him constantly that he meant nothing to her and never would. But now he did, and she’d be damned if she was gonna let him leave too.

“Well Peaches is known for it. Really luv, you should have talked to Darla first.” Buffy made a face as she thought about Julie. She really had been a nice person and that made her wonder if under different circumstances Darla could have been as well. “And as for Captain Cardboard, I could have told you that wouldn’t last. He was too…normal for you.”

“Normal? What if normal is what I need in this crazy life I live?” He sighed and walked over to where his coat was laying and pulled the cigarette pack out of his pocket.

“Keep lookin’ for normal on the hellmouth you’re gonna come up empty pet.” He opened the pack to find it empty and threw it down on the sarcophagus. He had a point there. But then again, hadn’t she decided just a few minutes ago that she was going confess her feelings for him…a vampire. That was definitely not normal. And she was okay with that…right? Right. The question was how was she going to work that into the conversation?

“I think I might love you.” Well that was one way to do it. She bit her lip and waited for a response.

Spike blinked not trusting his ears. It sounded like she’d just said she thought she loved him, but that couldn’t have been it. This was Buffy, and last time he checked Buffy hated him.

“You’re gonna have to run that one by me again luv.”

“I said…I think I love you. I mean I don’t know for sure…and I could be wrong and maybe it’s all in my head but…if I do, then I don’t wanna pretend anymore.” He cocked his head sideways and studied her, trying to decide if he believed that or not. Maybe that demon really had done something to her.

“Spike? I just confessed my feelings…now would be the time to say something.”

“Are you off your rocker?” Well that wasn’t exactly what she had wanted him to say.

“What?”

“Who are you and what have you done with Buffy?” Oh. Now she understood. He didn’t believe her. Probably thought she was under a spell or something. And why would he have any reason to think otherwise?

“Spike. This is me. I know it seems crazy, and maybe it is, but…I don’t care anymore. I’ve missed out on so much being afraid and worrying about what other people think. Except you. I wish I knew what you were thinking right now.” She sounded hopeful and that puzzled Spike even more. Was this really Buffy? And did she really want to be with him?

“I’m not sure I know what to think. You’re throwing me for a bit of a loop here slayer. I mean last time I saw you, you didn’t want anything to do with me or my feelings and now you’re telling me you think you love me…”

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to confuse you. I know this is all a little much. But to be honest with you Spike, I think I had these feelings all along and I was just too afraid to admit it to myself.”

“And now you’re not?” he asked and she shook her head no. “And why’s that then?”

“Because it’s pointless to be afraid. People waste so much of their lives being unhappy because they’re scared to take chances. I don’t want to be like that anymore.”

“So you’re serious about this?”

“Yes.”

“And you wanna be with me? For real be with me…not just shagging in your spare time?” She took a step closer to him.

“For real. Although the shagging part doesn’t sound so bad either.” He smirked at her as she stepped close to him and leaned up placing a kiss on his lips. He returned it with eagerness, though still unsure of the situation.

After a moment he pulled away and looked at her.

“So when did you come to this revelation?”

“When I was out. You know I…I kept seeing you. You would appear and tell me that the world I was living in wasn’t real. I thought I was losing my mind, but I guess it was my subconscious trying to tell me where I was wasn’t where I should be.”

“So what does all this mean?” He needed definite clarification.

“It means that…I’m willing to give us another chance. If…you promise not to be an asshole anymore.”

“I don’t know that I can promise you that slayer. It’s kind of a personality trait.” She smiled and shook her head.

“Well as long as you try.”

“I can do that.” He didn’t know exactly what that coma had done to her, but he wasn’t gonna complain. She leaned up and kissed him again, this time wrapping her arms around his neck. When she pulled back to breathe he decided to ask one more question.

“What about wanting to be normal?” Buffy smiled before replying.

“I thought about it and…normal…is highly over-rated.”

THE END





You must login (register) to review.