“Alrighty Spike! This is the Walker Extrodinaire.”
Spike stared dubiously at the contraption. It looked like a gymnast’s parallel bars, but a diaper-like harness dangled from tension wires coming out of the ceiling at one end.
“Looks like fun,” he said sarcastically. Inside, butterflies, bees, and all manners of insectae were crawling around his stomach. For the first time in a long time, he felt the urge to run. Because today…today he was going to walk for the first time in...months. Granted, he was going to be strapped into a contraption that supported a good amount of his weight…but he was going to walk.
“You’ll become best friends,” Sirra said dryly. “So, what we’re going to do is hook you up in the harness. The wires will be relaxed until you’re supporting most—but not all!—of your weight. Don’t look at me like that, we both know you’re not ready for all of it. Now, let’s run down the rules. If you start feeling dizzy or nauseous—“
“I’m a vampire, Lips.”
“—or just generally bad,” she continued undaunted, “you tell me immediately. We don’t want anything to happen that might set you back.” Spike felt a shudder race down his spine at the thought. Sirra stood in front of him, her eyes serious.
“Don’t expect too much from your first time, Spike. This is going to be harder than anything else you’ve done.” Spike nodded solemnly, but an irrepressible part of him was rejoicing at the chance to walk again. Logically, he knew this would still take time…but the idealist in him pictured himself running through cornfields to sappy music in no time at all.
“Alright! Spike, meet Ken and Dar. They’re my assistants. Interns, dontacha know. Boys…let’s get him suited up!”
Spike held his upper body up using the poles, his lower body completely supported by the wiring. He took a deep breath; if he had a pulse right now, it would be racing.
“You ready?” Sirra asked softly. Spike took a deep breath and nodded. “Alright. Lower him down. Remember to keep most of your weight in your arms, Spike.”
The two interns relaxed the wires a little at a time until Spike’s feet were flat on the ground. He felt a rush of adrenalin and excitement pass through him; his feet were on the floor! The wire relaxed another centimeter, letting some of the weight pass to Spikes legs…and they promptly collapsed.
“UP!” Sirra hollered, steadying Spike before he flipped forward and bashed his head into the floor.
“Fucking hell!” Spike swore viciously.
“Now now. None of that. It was just the first go. Reset it.” Spike waited patiently as they reset the wires. “OK, you know what to expect now, so just…go with it. Gradual, slow, steady, that’s the key.”
Four more tries, and each time the same result. Spike swore a blue streak each time he fell. He snapped at Sirra, growled at the cowering interns, and felt a hot rush of anger well inside of him. He would do this, goddamn it! He would prove he wasn’t worthless!
“Spike, I think that’s—“
“NO,” he growled. With extreme force of will, he pulled himself up and set each leg down. Locking his knees, he summed every ounce of strength left in his tired, battered body…and stood. Sirra gasped; the sheer amount of power and determination broadcasting from the vampire was breath taking. Before she could stop him, Spike tried to take a step.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
“What happened?” Leto growled. A scared assistant nearly fell trying to get out of the enraged Master Vampire’s way.
“He’s broken,” Sirra said calmly, testing Spike’s reactions to visual stimuli. Nothing. He was lost completely inside his own head.
“What do you—“
“I MEAN,” Sirra said with annoyance, “he’s finally reached his breaking point.” Really, when would people start LISTENING to her? This was the reason Alanna and Leto had been grounded the past month. “Remember that ticking timb bomb of anger and self loathing I told you about? Well, it’s gone off. Took him long enough. You’re going to have to do…something.”
“That’s very reassuring, Sirra,” Leto said sarcastically. “Where the HELL is Alanna?”
“Right behind you, asshole.” Leto spun around and took in the worried countenance of his mate. She knelt beside Spike, her side pressed firmly against Leto's.
“So how do we fix him?” Alanna asked, a Slayer ready to asses the situation and lead her troops to battle.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
Spike dispassionately watched the scene play out before him. It didn’t matter; after all, he’d lived through this before.
The helpless fledge had done something to piss off Angelus…again. He was tied up, beaten and bloody. One eye was swollen shut.
Angelus kissed Dru passionately, enjoying the heated whimpers of lust. Spike could smell them, the scent of their sex and Dru’s renewed excitement. He closed his eye to block out the sickening scene. His head snapped back, bearing his vulnerable throat.
“I told you to watch, Willy,” Angel snarled. He delivered a brutal blow to Spike’s unprotected stomach. “She’s mine, Boy. Watch what I do to her, to my property. And know…she’ll never be yours. You couldn’t hold her. Too weak and pathetic.”
Spike’s one good eye opened, fixing on the face of his Dark Princess, his salvation. He pleaded with her to ask Angelus to take pity, to say something, acknowledge him anything. But she just lounged, enjoying the show and his humilition. She arched her back and inhaled the scent of his helplessness.
“I’ll let you in on a little secret, Boy,” Angel said, licking the side of Spike’s throat. “You weren’t turned to be family. You’re just a glorified nurse maid.”
Spike felt shame and despair rise up within him; of all the things Angel and said and done to him, that was the one thing that affected him the most.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
“He could some out on his own!” Alanna protested.
“Yes,” Sirra conceded, “but do you really want to wait another six months? Spike seems to have a penchant for comas.” Alanna shook her head in frustration, ready to press her point till the end.
“He doesn’t like spells,” she repeated stubbornly.
“Says the Slayer who put him under two,” Leto said without any hint of judgment.
“I—“
“I know why you did it, Alanna. And a large part of me agrees and understands your reasons, otherwise I never would have gone along with it. But this is the safest, easiest way to bring him back. And we can’t not do it because you’re afraid of how it will affect the memory spell.”
A tense silence fell over the room. Alanna weighed her options carefully, but she’d know since a breathless intern had nearly broken her door down in desperation that there was only one path they could take.
“Summon the Seek.” She had a vampire to save.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
Spike was fucking Drusilla into the mattress, pounding into her with all he was worth. She was his savior, his Dark Princess. They belonged together, like this, for eternity.
His mind screamed in protest at what was about to happen, but he didn’t stop it. He didn’t want to stop it, he deserved this.
Spike pounded into the supple flesh beneath him, reveling in the feel of her, demon face forward. He felt himself nearing the edge, and he struck.
“MINE,” he growled. He suddenly found himself thrown half way across the room, a crazed vampiress on top of him. Her claws ripped viciously into his cheek, drawing blood.
“NO!” she snarled, enraged. She swiped at his face, leaving marks that oozed borrowed blood. She lashed out, toppled him, sent her denile and revulsion through their common link. “Not yours! Never yours. What would Daddy say?”
Her claws kept attacking him, her teeth gnashing at his neck. In desperation, Spike threw her across the room. She laughed delightedly, pulling her supple form off the floor, all signs of the mindless rage moments earlier gone. She twirled around the room, humming to herself.
“My boy’s been naughty, and naughty boys don’t get invited to tea, my Prince.” She twirled about, speaking to Miss Edith and the Pixies, talking about her precious Daddy.
Spike lay on the floor, fighting back tears.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
“Who’s going in?” Celina asked. Leto and Alanna exchanged glances.
“It will take both of them,” Nedra interrupted. Her voice carried the force of certainty only a Seer could command. They solemnly acknowledge the Prophetess’ words.
“We're going to have to rework the spell,” Chadra’s whisper of a voice sighed.
“Rework it fast,” Alanna commanded, he face set into a grim line.
*** *** ****** *** ****** *** ***
Spike felt every sting, relived every blow, and welcomed the punishment. It was what he deserved. He relived every insult, every demeaning act: Angelus forcing him into submission time and again; the dominance claim; Angelus’ idea of sex; Dru’s casual affairs and callous dismissals. But always, always, it came back to Angelus. A ripple went through him, but not enough to interrupt his own, personal peep show. Only now he had voyeurs.
Some of you may have noticed that I haven't updated in a while. There's a reason for that. Actually, a very very big reason.
My life is getting unbearably complicated, and I just don't have the time to write any more. I'm so sorry to leave so many works incomplete. And sadly, they'll probably never get finished. I could be convinced to leave an outline of what I had in mind. If anyone would like to adopt my fics, I'm more than happy to discuss it with you. This hasn't been an easy choice, but...I have to do it. It's not you, it's me.
Thank you all for reading. It's been a blast!
-Xela
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Some of you may have noticed that I haven't updated in a while. There's a reason for that. Actually, a very very big reason.
My life is getting unbearably complicated, and I just don't have the time to write any more. I'm so sorry to leave so many works incomplete. And sadly, they'll probably never get finished. I could be convinced to leave an outline of what I had in mind. If anyone would like to adopt my fics, I'm more than happy to discuss it with you. This hasn't been an easy choice, but...I have to do it. It's not you, it's me.
Thank you all for reading. It's been a blast!
-Xela
My life is getting unbearably complicated, and I just don't have the time to write any more. I'm so sorry to leave so many works incomplete. And sadly, they'll probably never get finished. I could be convinced to leave an outline of what I had in mind. If anyone would like to adopt my fics, I'm more than happy to discuss it with you. This hasn't been an easy choice, but...I have to do it. It's not you, it's me.
Thank you all for reading. It's been a blast!
-Xela