For the first time since he could remember, William practically ran out from the classroom instead of waiting until the rest of his classmates had left, like he always did. He was supposed to meet up with Buffy outside the cafeteria so they could have lunch together; she had asked him when they ran into each other this morning and he hadn’t been able to say no. The truth was, he didn’t want to say no. Ever since Buffy’s confession the other day – when she had admitted that she liked him and then ended up asking him out – he had been walking on clouds. And tonight, they were going out on their first date. He was both nervous and happy at the same time, and he had a feeling she felt the same way.
He usually avoided the cafeteria these days, having too many unpleasant memories from that place, but didn’t want to miss out on an opportunity to spend more time with Buffy. In fact, he missed her already and couldn’t wait to see her again. Heading towards the other side of the school building, he suddenly got the feeling he was being followed. Glancing over his shoulder, he sighed when he immediately recognized Liam, Parker, and two other guys who seemed vaguely familiar. ‘Great, now what?’ he thought, more annoyed than worried. He didn’t have time for this, and he sure wasn’t in a mood.
“Look, guys, it’s Willie!” William had no problem recognizing Liam’s voice, coming from behind him. For a moment, he considered simply ignoring him and just keep walking, but years of experience had taught him that doing so would only make things worse. If Liam and his friends had their minds set on giving him a hard time right now, they wouldn’t give up until they had gotten what they were after. That was the reason he – after a brief moment of hesitation – decided to stop and turn around, slowly.
“What do you want?” William realized that he sounded much more confident than he really was, and hoped that was a good thing. He couldn’t help but add; “How’s the nose?” and didn’t even try to hide the smug note in his voice. A part of him asked himself what the hell he was doing, realizing that humiliating his tormentor in front of his friends was probably the worst thing he could do in a situation like this, but nevertheless, he refused to back down. He was sick and tired of always just standing there, silently accepting whatever those bullies decided to say or do to him.
Of course, before he had met Buffy, he would never even have considered fighting back, in any way. He realized now that he had found a way to turn off all his feelings and emotions a long time ago, not really living, but just going along. Somewhere along the way, he had just stopped caring. But things were different now; for one thing, he was not alone in the world anymore. He had found someone who cared about him, someone who actually liked him. And that made him feel, not only happy, but alive, in a way he couldn’t remember ever feeling before. For the first time, he actually dared hoping that maybe he wasn’t doomed to a life in loneliness and despair after all.
His hopeless and pathetic crush on Cecily, before he had met Buffy, didn’t even come close to how he felt now. Because somewhere deep down, he had always known that his feelings back then would never be returned. A part of him had known that Cecily would reject him, even before he made a fool of himself by pouring his heart out to her. And more importantly; whatever feelings he had thought he had for Cecily could never compare to how he felt for Buffy now. Thinking about how much time he had spent chasing after that stupid bint made him cringe, he should have known better than to torture himself like that.
Having lost himself in his thoughts for a moment, reality came crashing down on him when Liam grabbed him, roughly, and pushed him up against one of the lockers behind him. “I’ll wipe that smug look off your face, you pathetic loser!” William refused to show any sign of fear, which only seemed to make Liam angrier. The dark-haired boy looked slightly taken aback for a moment, but then obviously decided to change his tactics. Liam took a step back, and when he spoke again, he sounded a little too calm for William’s liking. “I saw you talking to that cute, blonde girl before.”
William frowned. “So what? You jealous?” He had no idea what possessed him to keep talking to Liam like that; knowing that by doing so, he was pretty much asking to get beaten up. But for once, he didn’t care. And it felt really great. Until the moment Liam’s fist hit his jaw, causing him to see stars. Stumbling back a little, he managed to remain standing.
Liam’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t actually think she likes you, do you?” When William didn’t answer, he laughed. “Oh, you do? Then you must be even more stupid than I thought. Seriously, anyone can see she’s just playing with you. It’s pathetic. But then of course, that’s you, Willie-boy.”
Although William knew there was absolutely no truth in what Liam was saying, he would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that hearing those cruel words still hurt, a lot. He knew he needed to stay strong, not letting Liam get to him, but a small part of him would always doubt himself, thinking he could never be good enough. And he also knew Liam truly enjoyed playing with his insecurities like that. But now he realized that it was up to him, whether or not he should just keep accepting it or not.
He glared at Liam. “Name’s William. And you’re the one who’s pathetic.” As to explain, he gestured towards Liam’s three friends, standing a few feet away, just waiting for a sign from their leader to jump in. “Can’t do anything without your bloody mates there to back you up, can you? What’s the matter, afraid I’m gonna break your nose again?” ‘Don’t do this', a small voice inside his head pleaded. ‘There’s no need to piss him off more than necessary.’ But he just couldn’t help himself; after all the years of being bullied by this guy, he had finally had enough and it was time to let Liam know that. Of course, he would prefer coming out of the whole thing in one piece. Which was, judging by the look on Liam’s face, not very likely.
Liam stared at him in disbelief for a moment, then snorted. “Yeah, right!” He paused before nodding. “All right, if that’s how you wanna do this. Just you and me, then.” Noticing the uncertain expression on William’s face, Liam suddenly looked very pleased with himself. “Let’s continue this outside.”
TBC