The next day, Buffy ran into William again, this time just outside the library. She smiled, nervously. "Hi."
“Hello, Buffy.” William looked down at his feet. Buffy waited for him to say something more, but he remained quiet. Her smile faltered a little, but she refused to give up. He had been so nice when he had walked her home from that party, all those weeks ago, but whenever she ran into him at school, it seemed like he couldn’t get away from her fast enough. A sudden thought occurred to her – most of the people she had met here in Sunnydale so far considered her to be a loser, what if he felt the same way? Could he really be ashamed of being seen talking to her?
For some reason, she didn’t think that was the case; he didn’t seem like the type who listened to gossip, judging people without really knowing them. Maybe he was just shy. She made a new attempt of starting a conversation. “So, are you heading for the cafeteria? I’m supposed to meet up with Willow and Xander for lunch, wanna join us?” Holding her breath, she waited for him to answer.
“Oh. Um…” William looked genuinely surprised. Then he gestured towards the large doors, leading into the library. “Actually, I was gonna skip lunch today. Didn’t get my homework done last night, thought I’d better catch up. I'll just grab something to eat later.”
“Oh, of course. I understand.” Buffy put on a strained smile, trying not to let her disappointment show. “Well, I gotta go. I’ll see you in English class.” He just nodded. “Right. Bye.” She hurriedly left, suddenly eager to get away. To tell the truth, she didn’t know why she kept pushing. It was obvious that William wasn’t interested in getting to know her better; she should just stay away from him. But she couldn’t help herself. It wasn’t like she was in love with him or anything; she didn’t know him well enough for that. But there was something about him that just caught her attention; for some reason she felt like they actually had something in common, even if she didn’t know what it was. And it was very confusing.
Having reached the cafeteria, Buffy peeked into the crowded room in search for the familiar faces of her friends. Immediately spotting Willow’s red hair in the crowd, she let out a sigh of relief, happy to finally get to be around some people who wouldn’t treat her like a pathetic outsider. Unfortunately, it wouldn’t last very long. Because in less than forty minutes, she would have to go to history class. Alone, as usual.
William kept staring at the spot where Buffy had been standing, a longing expression on his face. She had actually talked to him again, and as usual, he couldn’t think of anything to say. For some reason, his mind became completely blank whenever he was around her, probably partly because she was just about the only person in the whole school who actually bothered to speak to him at all. In fact, he couldn’t understand why she kept approaching him; she should have noticed what a boring git he was by now.
Being around Buffy Summers was both wonderful and painful at the same time, wonderful because every time she spoke to him, he could pretend, at least for a little while, that someone actually cared about him. Not that Buffy was just anyone; he hadn’t been able to get her out of his mind since the first time they ran into each other at the party where he had made a fool of himself by declaring his undying love for Cecily Underwood. Who he, ironically, hadn’t given another thought since the moment Buffy had walked into his life.
It was also painful, because he knew that Buffy would never find out how much he had already come to care for her. In fact, he didn’t want her to find out, because the moment she would, she would probably never speak to him again. Why would she want someone like him to chase after her, when she should be able to get any guy in school if she wanted to? He was probably the last guy on earth she would ever be interested in. Buffy was sweet, kind, and beautiful, and he couldn’t bear the thought of her rejecting him like Cecily, or even worse; laughing at him. Which she probably would, should she ever find out how he really felt about her. Because no girl would be interested in a loser.
Of course, he would gladly settle for just being her friend. He still had a hard time to take in the fact that Buffy had actually just asked him to join her for lunch, and a part of him had desperately wanted to say yes. But there was just no way he would put himself through the torture of entering the cafeteria until most of the students had already left, not even for Buffy. Having learned that lesson the hard way, years ago, he spent most of his free periods at the school library. At least there they would leave him alone.
Buffy slumped down on the chair, silently willing the class to be over. Unfortunately, it had just started. She hated history class more than anything, mostly because neither Willow, nor Xander would be there. Luckily, they had most of the other classes together. But in this room she was left alone, with no mercy. And she hated every minute of it. When the teacher started talking, she knew she was looking forward to yet another hour of pure hell.
“I want you to team up in pairs for our next project, starting… right now.” The teacher – Mrs. French – had a firm look on her face as she gestured for them to do as she said, and Buffy closed her eyes in despair. Not this, anything but this! She knew all too well how things would end up. Ducking down in her chair, she did her best to appear as invisible as possible. Although, she was afraid it wasn’t working. And of course, it turned out that she was right.
“Miss Summers! Didn’t you understand what I was just telling you?” Mrs. French looked straight at her, arms crossed over her chest, and Buffy wished the floor would open up and swallow her.
Trying do ignore the huge lump forming in her throat, she lowered her eyes. “Yes, I did.”
The older woman opened her mouth, then closed it again with a nod, understanding dawning on her. “Oh, I see.” She looked out over the class. “It seems like Miss Summers hasn’t found anyone to work with. Maybe someone could…?” Leaving the rest of the sentence hanging, she kept looking at the other students, an expectant expression on her face. The room had suddenly become so silent; you could hear a pin drop.
Embarrassed beyond words, Buffy desperately tried to keep the tears from falling. “No, it’s okay. I actually prefer to work alone.”
“Really?” Mrs. French didn’t look convinced. “That will mean a lot more work for you.”
She forced a smile. “I don’t mind.” The teacher nodded, writing something down on her note-pad. Buffy let out the breath she had been holding. What she wouldn’t do to be anywhere but here.
TBC