[Reviews - 22]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Microsoft Word Chapter or Story | ePub eBook Chapter or Story | Printer Chapter or Story

Has been viewed 3844 times

- Text Size +




Author's Chapter Notes:
Word in between these symbols * * are thoughts. Thank you to my two fab Beta-readers.

Disclaimer: I Own Nothing
Buffy walked in to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her and sat on her bed, sighing as she took her jacket off. *Spike thinks he’s in love with me. Demons can’t love. Then why did he immediately back off when I held a stake to Drusilla’s heart a few years ago? Because she was his fixation. It was nothing more then that.* Shaking that thought away and letting herself fall back on to her bed, she tried to banish all thoughts of sexy bleached blonde vampires who we’re supposedly in love with her. Closing her eyes, allowing a multitude of memories to wash over her through her mind.

Stake in hand, behind the bronze after staking the vampire. Something had told her to turn around as she had, she had felt her slayer senses go on full alert, as she’d turned to face the newcomer.

Spike had come out of the shadows, slowly clapping his hands.

“Nice work, love.” Spike had drawled

“Who are you?” Buffy had questioned.

“You'll find out on Saturday.”

“What happens on Saturday?”

“I kill you.”


The large window had crashed in and then she had watched as the vampires entered
Spike and his fellow vampires had lined up and faced her, as she had stood in the hallway of Sunnydale High Preparing herself for the fight to come.

“What can I say? I couldn't wait” Spike had said in a way of explanation, smirking all the while.

“Fe, fi, fo fum. I smell the blood of a nice ripe,” he turned and faced Buffy, “girl.”

“Do we really need weapons for this?”

“I just like them. They make me feel all manly.”

He dropped the pole and slowly stepped toward Buffy. She dropped the axe.

“The last Slayer I killed... she begged for her life. You don't strike me as the begging kind.”

“You shouldn't have come here.”

“No. I've messed up your doilies and stuff. But I just got so bored. I'll tell you what.”
“As a personal favour from me to you I'll make it quick. It won't hurt a bit.”

“No, Spike. It's gonna hurt a lot.”

Suddenly, Her mind was drawn to a much happier memory.

Spike had been on his knees in front of her, holding her hand as she sat on the wooden chair.
It's just so sudden. I don't know what to say.”
Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on earth.”

“Oh, Spike! Of course it's yes”

Buffy opened her eyes and sat up. *Oh, my God* Looking at the clock, she noticed that she’d only been in her room for about forty minutes. Groaning, she got up, quickly stripped and got changed in to her nightclothes. She pulled back the cover and got in to bed, tossing and turning as her mind swirled with thoughts. *Spike, Spike, Spike. Why am I even thinking about him? Maybe because I was so cruel to him when all he’d asked for was for a crumb, a small chance that maybe one day I’d feel something for him, and I couldn’t even give him that. Even if I was absolutely sure I couldn’t, I didn’t have to say what I said, but I did it anyway. What kind of person does that make me?*

Buffy tried to ignore the guilt nagging at her. *Why was I so harsh to him? It’s not like anyone asks to fall in love. Especially not with his or her worst enemy or supposed worst enemy. Sure I had to let him down, but couldn’t I have done it nicer? 'The only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious' What the hell was I thinking? Oh, I know he’s a vampire. It won’t hurt him but that look in his eyes after I said it. I know how much it hurts for someone to say something cruel to you like that, and I did it anyway.*

Buffy sighed, switching off her lamp. *No it’s not your fault. He’s a vampire. He can’t feel emotions. They can’t fall in love. He’s just obsessed. Vampires can’t love. It’s as simple as that.* She tried to reassure herself, turning over. *No it’s not as simple as that. Spike had been in love with Drusilla for over a hundred years. Since when did I start grouping all vampires in to one bunch?* Buffy asked herself, suddenly feeling like her slayer logic and her Buffy normal girl logic was colliding over and over. Just like it always did when it came to Spike. *Around the same time Angel left. Oh, no, I am so not going there. Angel is nothing like Spike.*

Buffy Back-pedaled. *Except for the fact that they’re both vampires, they have nothing in common; exactly Spike doesn’t leave. I am not going down the path of how much better Spike is then Angel or how much better Angel is then Spike. Who am I kidding? Not myself, that’s for sure. Spike would stay; even I know that. Not that I’d admit it to anyone else. Spike loves completely; he doesn’t hold back or try and hide it. He’s not afraid to admit it, I’ll give him that.* Buffy let herself remember another memory.

She had been standing in the middle of the magic box next to Angel and across from Spike in the trashed store. Her eyes had been on Spike wearily as he talked.

“You're *not* friends. You'll never be friends.
You'll be in love till it kills you both.
You'll fight, and you'll shag and you'll hate each other
'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends.
Love isn't brains children, it’s blood...
blood screaming inside you to work its will.
I may be love's bitch, but at least
I'm man enough to admit it.”

Buffy smiled slightly as she remembered his nickname for himself back then. *He’s love’s bitch all right. He’d do practically anything for the women he loves, which at the moment happens to be me. So why can’t I let myself accept his love?*

Closing her eyes and trying to drift off to sleep, Buffy felt restless. She thought back to earlier that evening.

As she had stood, chained to the wall in the lower level of spike’s crypt, her eyes never left him.

“I'm gonna prove something.” He moved closer to her. “I love you.”

“Oh, my, god.”

“No, look at me!” He grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. “I ... love you.” Not wanted to hear what he had to say, Buffy jerked her chin away from him hand and he said, You're all I bloody think about. Dream about. You're in my gut ... my throat ... I'm drowning in you, Summers, I'm drowning in you.”
“Just ... give me something ... a crumb ... a barest smidgen ... tell me ... maybe, someday, there's a chance. “

Standing up Buffy, started to pace. She changed in to a pair of jeans and a top, slipped in to her trainers and did her hair up in a quick yet tidy bun. *Would it be so bad to give him a chance?* she asked herself, grabbing her jacket and running out of her room. She knew the answer was most certainly no. It wouldn’t be so bad, giving Spike a chance.





You must login (register) to review.