Buffy stood outside the travel agency; she looked at the posters adorning the windows, Beautiful exotic places, Hawaii, Paris, Australia. Every picture showed a man and a woman doing something incredibly touristy while looking at each other with all the love in the world.
She cringed, would she look completely pathetic if she booked one of these romantic holidays for one? She looked at the posters, would she really have that much fun on the Eiffel tower by herself? Would she have that look of pure joy while she petted a fluffy koala?
She shook her head slightly and walked away. She had finished work for the day and her feet were tired and sore but she hated the subway and didn�t have much cash for a cab fare. She walked slowly, enjoying the soft breeze tousle her hair. She closed her eyes for a moment and stood in the middle of the footpath, why did she want to leave this city? It had everything
She opened her eyes. And there was her reason.
There he was seated a few meters away at a sidewalk caf�.
Rule number one of a breakup, never stop thinking about him because the moment you do he will appear.
She looked around quickly, desperate for a place she could hide, there was nowhere and if she turned around she would be heading further away from her apartment. He was looking down at his paper and she knew the second he raised his eyes he would see her, she was in his direct line of vision.
She had no choice; she turned around quickly and disappeared into the throng of people.
She walked along berating herself. How stupid was she? Running away from her ex on the street, she was walking the wrong way to her apartment and had no money for a cab fare. Who knew how long he would be sitting there?
She needed to get away that was for sure, she walked into the travel agent she had passed earlier. She approached an older woman behind the counter �Hi, I�d like to book a one way ticket to Sunnydale�
She was going home.
****
Buffy hung up from her mother; she had had a hard time explaining the reason behind her sudden trip. Her mum had known of Spike but hadn�t met him.
�So how long are you coming home for Buffy?� she had asked in a worried tone
�I don�t know yet mom, my ticket is one way so when I decided to come home I guess� she was going through her wardrobe and tossing things into an open suitcase
Her mother sighed �What did Spike do to hurt you so much sweetie? It�s not like you to runaway�
Buffy stopped �It�s not what he did, it�s what he didn�t do� she caught her reflection in her mirror, her face was full of sadness and her eyes were dull and lifeless. She wasn�t even running away from him anymore, she was running away from this feeling. This hollow, desperate feeling.
�I just need to feel happy again mom� she said in a small voice �I don�t think I can feel that here�
�Oh Buffy� her mom whispered �I�ll see you at the airport�
�Thank you�
A few days later Buffy stood outside her childhood home, her mother�s arm wrapped around her �Welcome home baby� she whispered to her middle child
Buffy wrapped her arms around her mother and hugged her tight �I love you mommy�
Joyce�s eyes filled with tears, she hated seeing her daughter in so much pain, Strong, independent Buffy hugging her mother as though she was 6 years old again. Joyce pulled back and brushed her daughters hair out her eyes, Buffy had always seemed beyond her years but at the moment Joyce wouldn�t have believed her daughter was 23.
The door burst open and a tall gangly teen came bursting out �Buffy!� screamed 17 year old Dawn as she ran to her older sister.
Buffy smiled and ran to meet her sister; she almost had to stand on her tip toes to hug her �Oh my god Dawny stop growing!�
Dawn smirked �You�re just jealous because you�re the short ass of the family�
�Dawn don�t say ass� their mother admonished
Dawn rolled her eyes and grabbed her sister�s hand, they walked into the kitchen and Buffy was enveloped in another warm hug. Buffy closed her eyes and squeezed her big brother tight �Who�s the guy and how big is he?� he whispered in her ear
Buffy smiled and pulled away �You could take him any day Angel�
He smiled but his eyes remained somber �Seriously are you ok?�
She nodded �Better now, help me get my bags?�
They walked out and together lugged 5 suitcases inside �My god Buff, how long are you planning on staying?�
�Until it stops hurting�
************
Spike paced around his apartment his phone held tightly in his hand. It had been 6 weeks and he was going crazy, everyday he picked up the phone to ring her but couldn�t go through with it.
He missed her more than he ever imagined he would. Nothing was the same without her, every single day he berated himself for losing her, for not holding her closer to him, not letting her inside.
He was afraid that if he let her inside it would hurt all the more if he lost her.
Well he had lost her and it hurt like hell.
Finally he threw the phone on the bed, a phone call wasn�t enough. He needed to see her, hear her voice and feel her in his arms.
An hour later he stood outside her building arguing with her doorman �Look mate you have buzzed me in before, I just need to see her�
The man shook his head �I am sorry Ms Summers is not here�
�I know mate but let me in and I�ll just leave these and go� he held up a bunch of lilies �I�ll be 2 minutes�
�Ms Summers will not be back for a while�
�What do you mean?�
�She has gone home to see her family�
Spike�s heart dropped �How long for?�
The doorman shrugged �She did not say, but she had lots of luggage�
Spike turned and walked away, she had left and he had no idea if she was coming back. He threw the bouquet of lilies in the bin as he walked past.
What the hell had he done?
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Oh my god! I am so incredibly happy with all the wonderful reviews. Thank you all so much for your support. Hope you enjoy this next chapter.
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