Chapter 4
Spike didn’t know what to think about the grin she graced him with once he reached the back of the store, but it was probably nothing good.
“I knew you couldn’t resist me.”
He shook his head. “I’m only here for the truth. Is there something going on between us? Have we ever done anything?”
She let out a sigh. “Is something wrong with your memory? Believe me, if we did anything, you would know it. Honestly, I’ve wanted you for years. I never understood why you settled for Buffy, she’s so prim and proper. You could do better, Spike. I’ve been coming on to you for a while now, hoping you would finally come to your senses.”
Spike didn’t know why, but he was very relieved by her words. “So, I never cheated on Buffy?”
“Of course not, but there’s a first time for everything,” she said seductively, trailing her hand down his arm.
He took a step back. “Yeah, that’s never going to happen. I have a family to get back to. They mean far too much for me to just throw everything away on a cheap thrill. Sorry to disappoint,” he claimed, making his way back to the front of the store, deciding that it was time to go home.
* * * * *
Buffy watched as Spike played with the girls, chasing them all around the backyard.
He picked Kayla up and twirled her around; putting her down before she could get too dizzy.
Tara giggled. “My turn,” she stated, laughing again as Spike did the same with her.
He fell to the ground, Tara resting on his chest, gazing into his eyes.
“I knew you would come back,” she whispered.
Spike felt his eyes tear up as he held the little girl to him, pressing kisses to the top of her head. This was where he belonged.
* * * * *
Buffy was taken by surprise when Spike embraced her from behind, picking her up a little in the process.
“Hey, you feeling okay?” she said with a laugh.
He nodded and put her back down. “I realized a lot today, Buffy. You’re the one I want, the one I’ve always wanted. I was a bloody wanker in the past, thinking I could just let you go. I never stopped loving you. I made a huge mistake and this is my chance to change things.”
She nodded, still unsure about his behavior. “I just want you to be happy.”
Spike smiled. “I am happy, for the first real time in my life. The money situation, acting like a selfish git, I was an idiot. Everything we need is right here.”
Buffy smiled as well, pleased to have her husband back.
* * * * *
Spike felt it when he was out the next day, knew that something was wrong, which was confirmed the second he saw her in the distance. He headed in her direction, ready to give her a piece of his mind.
“You’re not sending me back, all right? You wanted to teach me a lesson, I get that. I know what’s important now. I have a real family here, something I’ve never had before. You can’t just take that away from me.”
Tracy shook her head. “A glimpse is only temporary, William.”
“I don’t bloody care! You brought me here, and you can make it so I stay. I can’t leave them.”
She gave him a sad smile. “You’re exactly who I thought you were. I’m very proud of you. Don’t worry, if you like this life so much, you can always get it back.”
Spike didn’t know what she meant, but didn’t have a chance to ask as she vanished before his eyes. The next second, it started to snow again, and Spike knew that it was all over.
* * * * *
He was afraid to fall asleep as he watched Buffy lying peacefully in their bed, looking so utterly beautiful. He could stare at her forever, wanting this moment to never end, but Spike knew it was a losing battle when his eyelids started to droop. It wasn’t long before he fell into a deep slumber.
* * * * *
Spike awoke with a start, gazing around at his surroundings to find that he was back in his dreary apartment. He quickly got dressed, opening his door and bumping into Harmony Kendall, who was wearing something that left very little to the imagination.
“Hey, Spikey, I got away a bit sooner than I thought. Are you going to unwrap your Christmas present now?”
Spike raised his eyebrows at her. “Christmas? I’m right back to where I started,” he said to himself, then addressed her. “Sorry, Harm, I have an elsewhere to be.”
She watched in confusion as he took off down the hall, a pout forming on her face.
* * * * *
Spike barged into Angel’s house, not caring that he wasn’t asked to come in.
“You were right about everything. This isn’t the life I want, Angel. I want what you have, the wife, the kids, the whole being with your family on Christmas. I made a big mistake by letting Buffy go. I have to find her.”
Angel held his hands up. “Whoa, slow down, where is all this coming from?”
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, but I need your help. I need to track down where she would be now, if she’s hopefully still single.”
Angel nodded. “Okay, but this isn’t the right time. Cordelia will have my head if I make them wait any longer. Just give me a few hours or so, then I’ll help you.”
Spike agreed and just now seemed to take notice of the angry brunette, and two little tykes waiting by the Christmas tree. “Right, sorry to barge in on the festivities. We’ll talk about this later,” he told Angel, then left the house.
* * * * *
Spike walked all over the city, taking in a new appreciation for everything around him. The Christmas lights, parents out with their children, hoping more than anything to have that life with Buffy again. He now understood what the angel told him, that if he could only find her, he could recreate what they had together. Spike just prayed that she would want that. They didn’t exactly leave things on good terms; Buffy had every reason to hate him. He would do whatever he could to win back her trust, getting her back was the most important thing to him at the moment. And if she already had a family of her own, then he would respect that, but he had to apologize for the way he treated her. She at least deserved to know how sorry he was. Now, he just had to find her.
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