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Green Eyed Christmas
Part 3




~~~~~~~~~~
"I'll have a blue Christmas
without you
I'll be so blue thinking
about you.."
~~~~~~~~~~



Three days later, Buffy spotted Melinda and Spike
together at the Sunnydale Mall. They looked to be
Christmas shopping, although Spike was the one
carrying all the packages.

She followed behind them at a sensible distance,
not wanting Spike to 'sense' her presence, as he
claimed he always could.

Watching them weave in and out amongst the crowds
of holiday shoppers gave Buffy a slightly sick feeling
that she couldn't explain.

She was being ridiculous, she scolded herself. It's
wasn't as though she cared who Spike consorted with.
If he wanted to be seen with tacky ex-cheerleader type
looking females, that was his business. As long as he
was leaving HER alone, Buffy's little boat sailed serene.

"Oh, that figures," she muttered, watching them walk
into a lingerie store. Not even a classy one like Victoria's
Secret. This was one of those places that specialized
in leopard skin prints and marabou feathers all over
everything. Sequined pasties and edible underpants
were the special deal of the day, or so the sign in the
window proclaimed.

Hiding behind a potted poinsettia bush, Buffy observed
Melinda pick up what looked like a sexy elf costume
from one of the racks. She held it up to herself and turned
to say something to Spike, obviously soliciting his opinion.

Buffy could almost hear him praise the trashy looking
ensemble. He'd be wearing that patented smirk he'd
perfected over the years, one eyebrow would arch slightly
and he'd say something like, "You're filling my stocking
up already, luv."

Disgusting. She was well rid of him and his sexy little
remarks...and admiring glances. His heart in his eyes,
and the gentleness he displayed whenever she was
upset. The way he'd touched her during that long, wildly
passionate night together...whispering in her ear...telling
her he loved her...that he would always love her and no one
else.

Well. So much for undying love.

That annoying laugh of Melinda's disrupted her thoughts,
and she looked up just in time to see Spike smiling at the
girl...and leaning closer...and closer....

"Whatcha doing?"

Buffy nearly jumped out of her suede boots when Willow
tapped her on the shoulder. She spun around quickly,
her packages smacking her friend in the side.

"Whoa, slow down," Willow laughed. She glanced around
Buffy and said, "You're not planning on buying something
in there are you?"

Flustered, Buffy shook her head and bent down to pick
up the bag she'd clobbered Willow with. "In there? Get
real," she laughed, a little too loudly. "Like I'd be seen
dead in that place."

Spike and Melinda were heading for the front of the
store, and Buffy wasn't about to be caught spying by
him. She took Willow's arm and began dragging her in
the direction of the food court. "Come on," she said
brightly. "Let's get some hot chocolate and one of those
big cinnamon buns. My treat."

She had a sudden unexplainable need for comfort food.


~~~~~~~~~~
"Decorations of red
On a green Christmas tree
Won't mean a thing
If you're not here with me.."
~~~~~~~~~~



Buffy shivered when she walked into the house. It was dark and cold and empty, and she was immediately conscious
of the bleak feeling she'd been fighting off ever since she'd
run across Spike and his new girlfriend.

She dumped her packages on the sofa and turned up the
thermostat, hoping to dispel the damp chill of the weather
from both her house and her heart.

There was a note from Dawn on the coffee table. She'd
been invited to a friends house for the night and would be
home late tomorrow afternoon. Buffy grabbed the phone and
made a quick call, confirming this information. After speaking
with Holly Westcott's mother and being assured that the two
girls wouldn't be going anywhere that night, she had spoken
to Dawn and instructed her to come straight home the following
day.

After that, there wasn't much else to do. She wandered aim-
lessly around the house, cleaning up a few things here and
there. Started a load of laundry and washed the breakfast
dishes. Opened the mail and stuck the Christmas cards in
the slats of the blinds.

Hoping for a little holiday cheer, she plugged in the lights on
the tree and sat beneath it wrapping a few gifts.

She wrapped, labeled and set gifts for Xander, Willow, and
Oz beneath the tree, then reached for the last bag and
extracted it's contents; a silky shirt the color of the
Mediterranean Sea that she'd bought, figuring
that Dawn would want to have something for Spike.

** He'd better damn well appreciate it after I spent
so much time looking for something this color..**

Buffy folded the garment neatly, setting it in a shirt
box and covering it with a thin slice of blue tissue
paper.

When it too was wrapped and sporting a decorative
bow, she peeled off another label and stuck it on
the box, then wrote 'To Spike from Buffy'. She
was about to place it under the tree when she
caught herself. Placing another label on top of the
first one, she addressed it properly this time.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I'll have a blue Christmas
that's certain
And when that blue heartache
starts hurtin'..."
~~~~~~~~~~


The following morning she was up early. After
showering, she went downstairs to have break-
fast.

She made herself a cup of tea and ate a bowl
of cereal, then went back to her room and made her
bed. When that chore was finished, there wasn't
much left for her to do, so she puttered around the
house all day until Dawn finally came home.

Buffy practically jumped on her sister when she
came through the door. "Hi!" she said, a little too
cheerfully. "Did you have fun last night?"

Dawn dropped her overnight bag on and the floor
and headed for the stairs, with Buffy right on her
heels.

"Yeah, I had fun" Dawn said when it became obvious
that Buffy was expecting an answer. "I'll tell you
about it later, okay?" She stripped off her jeans
and sweater, then redressed in a black skirt and
a cherry red blouse.

Buffy frowned as she observed her sister changing
and fixing her make up. "Are you going out again?"
she asked, hating the prospect of spending the
evening alone with no one to talk with.

"Just for a little while," Dawn replied as she brushed
her hair. "I'm meeting Spike at the China Palace."

This nugget of information truly surprised Buffy. "You
mean for dinner? You're meeting Spike to have dinner
with him?"

When had THAT sort of thing started happening?

"Uh-huh." Dawn pulled on her leather jacket. "He
wants me to meet this girl he's been seeing. I think
he really likes her, but he says he wants my approval
before it gets serious."

** Oh! So, it's...not serious yet?**

Buffy refused to analyze what malfunction in her brain
was responsible for THAT thought.

"Well..." she said lamely. "Don't be out too late,
okay?"

Something in her tone made Dawn stop and turn
around. "Did you...want to come along?" she asked
hesitantly. "I'm sure Spike won't mind."

Buffy shook her head. "Oh, no. No thanks. I
have...stuff I need to do. Lots of...you know..."

"Stuff," Dawn provided. "Okay, well..why don't
you call Xander or Willow? They could come over
and help you with your...whatever stuff you need
to do."

"Yeah," Buffy said, nodding in a short, jerky way. "I
might do that. You go ahead and go. I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

"Totally. Go. Have fun."


~~~~~~~~~~
"You'll be doing all right
With your Christmas of white.."
~~~~~~~~~~


She called both Willow and Xander, who both had
previous plans for the evening, and who both invited
her to come along with them.

Buffy declined their invitations, not wanting to be the
third party in what had been planned for only two.

She hung up the phone in the kitchen, then wandered
back into the living room.

Sinking down onto the sofa, she sat and studied the
colorful glow of the tree lights, which for some reason
made her feel melancholy and alone.

Entirely...alone.


~~~~~~~~~~
"But I'll have a blue, blue Christmas.."
~~~~~~~~~~

TBC....
(I guess being alone isn't all it's cracked up
to be)





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