“Angel, Fred and Gunn gave me things to do yes, but they were so boring. I need action. I need violence. I need something that matters. It’s like being in England all over again. I have no purpose here,” Buffy paced in Angel’s office while continuing her peace, “Isn’t there anything in this office for me to do tomorrow that’s worth while?”
Angel thought for a moment and then said, “I’ll think of something. For now come on and you can get changed into something nice for Lorne’s club.”
Angel followed her down the elevator to her room. She frowned as she said, “Come in Angel” knowing she didn’t really want him in there but had no choice.
She sighed going to her bags and pulled out a black skirt with a red tank top and a white jacket cover.
She stared at Angel who turned around obediently and she pulled the clothes on and looked at herself in the mirror. She sighed noticing how pale she was, she put on some foundation to help and some powder. She added some rouge and a dab of strawberry flavored lip-gloss. The gloss reminded her of a time where Spike had licked it completely off her lips saying, “Mmm, slayer you taste so good.” She had bought a ton back then of all different flavors to see which one he liked the best.
She sighed thinking never again and turned around to see Angel smiling at her saying, “You look nice.”
She looked in the mirror seeing no one behind her but said nothing. She put on a fake smile and let her take her hand and take her upstairs.
Spike wasn’t tired and was just anxious to get back to L.A. He had a vial for Fred, an urn for Wesley and scrolls for Angel. He thought the trip went well even if it had to be spent on a lumpy thing all night long.
He leaned back thinking of how Buffy would have responded being on a camel in the desert for two nights. She would have been totally pissed and probably stomped the whole way there. She was really quite the gal. She was irreplaceable and he missed her so much.
Part of him was tempted to tell big honcho to go bugger off and fuck himself and go find her but she deserved better than him but it didn’t help fill the emptiness in him that only she filled.
Buffy sighed as Lorne tried to convince her to go up there and sing again. She couldn’t think of anything as she flipped through the options and found one.
When You’re Gone By Avril Lavigne
I always needed time on my own/I never thought I’d need you there when I cry/And the days feel like years when I’m alone/And the bed where you lie is made up on your side/when you walk away I count the steps that you take/Do you see how much I need you right now?/When you’re gone/The pieces of my heart are missing you/When you’re gone/the face I came to know is missing too/When you’re gone/The words I need to hear to always get me through/The day and make it ok/I miss you/I’ve never felt this way before/Everything that I do, reminds me of you/And the clothes, you left lie on the floor/And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do/When you walk away, I count the steps that you take/Do you see how much I need you right now?/When you’re gone, the pieces of my heart are missing you/When you’re gone/The face I came to know is missing too/When you’re gone/The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok/I miss you/We were made for each other/Out here forever/I know you were, yeah/And alll I ever wanted was for you to know/Everything I’d do, I’d give me heart and soul/I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me/yeah/When you’re gone/The pieces of my heart are missing you/When you’re gone/the face I came to know is missing too/When you’re gone/The words I need to hear to always get me through/The day and make it ok/I miss you…
The crowd cheered again but Buffy didn’t wait for the encore to be heard. She didn’t know any other songs to sing.
She sat at the table and said, “I think I want a drink of something stronger.” Angel looked at her and shrugged signaling to Lorne to get her something.
Lorne grinned and gave her scotch. She took a drink and made an adorable alcohol face.
Fred gasped then tried to hide it but she remembered a conversation the gang had with Spike about Buffy’s adorable drinking face and Angel had said she didn’t really make that.
She looked up and met Wesley’s eyes that looked knowing at her but said nothing.
Buffy took another drink making that face and Lorne frowned. He didn’t want her to get drunk. She reached over behind Angel and started chugging the bottle.
Lorne looked at Angel as though to stop her and Angel just shrugged taking a sip of his. Buffy had downed half the bottle in one gulp. She remembered when the last time she drank was with Spike. They had gotten so drunk and had a date where he played kitten poker. She had stomped off in anger but really had hoped he would have come after her. Of course he did.
She felt the tears threatening to fall and she left the bottle on the table saying, “Night you guys. It was fun.” She stood up and rushed out of the room to return to the safeness of her bed.
Lorne looked at Angel saying, “Don’t you feel the least bit guilty over that baby girl’s pain?”
Angel shrugged not really feeling that guilty. He felt bad for her but knew he could fix it. He said in a confident voice, “It will get better. She just is still upset over Sunnydale and not fitting in. Tomorrow Wesley I want you to take Buffy to your thing and have her work on something. I don’t care what but make her feel worthy. Hell take her to some tomb or something if you want, just make her feel important.”
Wesley sighed but said nothing as Fred said, “I really think you should reconsider what you are doing.”
Angel wouldn’t listen and Lorne whispered knowing Angel could hear him anyway, “This is going to end very badly.”
He picked up the bottle setting it on the back counter in case she wanted more. He hated to waste a good bottle of scotch.
Buffy laid on her bed in tears. She missed Spike so much and this wasn’t making it any easier. She couldn’t figure out why Xander and Giles and them sent her here. She knew why. She wasn’t honest with him and telling them that she didn’t love Angel that way anymore. This was just so hard. It was too hard in fact. She felt guilty and lonely and she ached for him.
She rolled over noticing there was a phone in her room and picked it up to call Willow.
Spike stepped off the airplane, which made record timing on the way back. He carried his bags, the urn and the vial and called Angel, “I’m here. Where are you?”
Angel shrugged figuring inviting him to the club at this point wouldn’t matter so he said, “The club. Got the scrolls?”
Spike replied, “The gang there? I got something for the Texan and watcher boy as well as you. I’m still pissed at you mate. I just want to lay down and sleep for days.”
Angel sighed and said, “I got a local gig for you tomorrow. Might take a while but it’s local. Then I got one in Africa but like I said the one in L.A. is local and easier so we will do that one first.”
Spike said, “See ya.” He hung up and swiped his card punching the 1 button.