Buffy awoke in Spike’s arms. She laid there a minute and thought about her life up until now bringing her to this point in time. She felt his still body under her head and felt his cool arms wrapped around her pulling her close. She sighed feeling content. She finally had won a battle.
She giggled for a moment remembering Spike breaking the window to her high school. She had seen him once before where he clapped at her performance for killing the vampire who was ‘about to bite someone’ outside of the Bronze. He was hot even back then but he was aiming to kill her. He had promised to see her on Friday when he was supposed to kill her. He instead had broken through the window during parent conferences to kill her earlier than planned. He would have too if her mom wouldn’t have saved the day.
Oh God how things have changed since then. He had helped her save the world quite a few times. He had been there when everyone else had left. He died saving the world for her. She was still hurt he didn’t trust her enough to come back but part of her blamed Angel for that.
Angel had spent years brainwashing Spike into listening and depending on him. Angel used that to his advantage to ensure he would get Buffy back, not Spike.
Buffy gave Spike a gentle kiss and crawled out of bed and started pacing. Angel deliberately tried to ruin her life and Spike’s. He knew their pain, knew what the reason for it was and blatantly ignored their feelings and was selfish.
She thought back on Angel’s actions the whole time seeing them in a whole new light. Angel always came and went as he wanted only saving her when necessary, which was probably what was requested by the powers to be. He didn’t stick around to save her after it got to be too hard on him. He never tried to anchor his soul like Spike did. God how could she have been so blind. She thought of how Angel had killed Jenny, how Angel had run away leaving her to deal with life alone and how he had sent out spies she had seen from time to time to check up on her. She had thought at first it was endearing but now…he didn’t even bother to check on her himself.
She got madder and madder as she paced. Finally she could no longer take it and slammed her fist into the wall breaking the drywall and cutting her hand open yet again.
Spike jumped at the noise and rushed to her side saying, “What the hell are you doing?”
He yanked her by the hand over to the bathroom and pushed her hand over under the water. He watched her blood pour down the sink as he yelled, “What are you thinking? You can’t just go hitting walls all the time.”
Buffy shrugged wanting to do it again so she kicked the wall under the sink saying, “I need to see Angel, can you help?”
Spike nodded she needed this out of her system before she completely destroyed her body. He carefully wrapped up her hand, “I was a ghost and I saw every little tiny space in this law firm. I probably know more than even the higher ups know and I have clearance to the control freak’s place.”
Buffy nodded testing out her hand and said, “Let’s go.”
Spike looked down at their lack of clothing saying, “We might want to get dressed first. He’s already seen more than I care him to see of you.”
Buffy nodded and pulled on a red tank top with a black skirt with red panties. Buffy felt some of her anger drain out of her as she watched the way Spike admired her while she dressed. He then threw on his clothes from the day before and she felt bad saying, “Let’s stop by your place first so you can get clean clothes.”
Spike didn’t argue and swiped his card and entered 2 for his apartment.
Buffy glanced around the room noticing it was neat and tidy and appeared barely lived in. There was a play station on the television with a black leather chair in front of it. There was a refrigerator, which had some blood that he drank as he threw her a strawberry pop tart which she nibbled on. There was a plain white-sheeted bed with a sensible blanket folded at the bottom, neatly made. He quickly stripped walked to a dresser pulling out blank jeans and a black shirt then redressed saying, “We will shower after we get you feeling less angry.”
Buffy nodded as she thought for a moment about never having the chance to meet up with Spike again to remind herself of why she was going Angel. He was yet again treating her as a child when she was a woman. Spike entered the elevator and swiped his card punching a number saying, “This will take us to his office. If he’s not there then I can use the card to get into his bedroom from there.”
Buffy nodded not saying a word. She wanted to be sure to save all her anger for Angel where it belonged. Spike stepped back when the elevator dinged, letting Buffy make her perfect entrance as she always did. Spike knew any entrance he made would be perfect. He was not disappointed as Buffy stomped into the office and crossed her arms. He could almost feel her anger pouring off her as she waited impatiently for him since Angel was on the phone. He was sort of surprised she didn’t hang up on him but he figured she had a plan. Buffy was actually tempted to just let him have it even if he was on the phone but instead sat and unflexed and reflexed her hands into tight little fists dying to use them on something or someone.
Finally after a few minutes he hung up the phone and stared at both parties in his office. Buffy walked up behind his desk to stand in front of him saying, “I have three things to say to you Angel. I’m still pissed so you are lucky you’re only getting 3 things. 1. I haven’t forgiven you, and in fact I’m not even sure I will forgive you. So don’t say you’re sorry, don’t give excuses and above all don’t attempt to justify your actions. I got them loud and clear. You were acting selfishly and trying to control me yet again. This leads to me to number 2. I’m not your child or someone you can control. I never gave you the right to control me. If Giles nor my mother could control me, what makes you think you have the right. I’m SOOOOOO tired of you doing what you think is best for me. I’m 23 years old. I think I can handle figuring out is best for me. So stop it, and stop being so damn selfish! Which brings me to the last and final point, which is 3. I trusted you. Notice it’s past tense. I trusted you with me when I was hurt. I trusted you to have my back, keep me safe and sound and protect me from harm. You first off left me alone in Sunnydale where I proceeded to die, get shot by a gun, almost die again getting stabbed and then become just about suicidal. Where were you when all that happened?”
Angel tried to answer but Buffy could care less about what he had to say so instead finished for him, “I’ll tell you where. You were here in L.A. figuring out ways to keep me from moving on with my life when you’ve obviously moved on with yours. How can I trust someone who acts selfishly?”
Angel started saying, “Spike…”
Buffy said, “OK so you want to talk about Spike. Let’s shall we? He helped me top stop you from ending the world and sending me along with all my friends to Hell. He apologized in his own way about Jenny’s death that oh wait you caused! He protected me from whatever he could, he cared for my mom and protected her, he cared for Dawn while I was away and you were busy doing whatever it was you were doing instead of caring about my life. He has played errand boy for you because he wanted to fight the good fight while you did whatever you do at your little desk in your evil law firm. You play God yet you are far from perfect. So yea I chose Spike. He stuck by me even when I treated him like garbage and he never asked for anything in return. He saved the world and shrugged and went on. He helped me destroy you and all he did was pick up his Ho of a girlfriend and disappeared. He never asks for anything. I imagine if he had come to see me as he planned and if I had gone back to my bitchy self, as long as he could fight the good fight, he would have stayed. You never allowed that to happen. You purposely controlled the situation to make sure you seemed like the hero. You wouldn’t have stayed and I treated you like gold. Plus he loves me and I love him. So Angel, point is, leave us alone. Don’t contact us, don’t even stalk us and above all, don’t think about us.”
Buffy was now right up in his face with her hands on her hips and her eyes flashing a darkness black instead of her usually bright green. Angel noticed something on her neck and took a whiff into the air saying, “YOU CLAIMED HER??”
Buffy’s eyes got big as he yelled at her and Spike and she took a step back and Spike rushed to her side in case Angel did anything rash.
Angel shoved Spike against he wall saying, “I’ll dust you boy for that. She was mine, she had a mark on her from me. You don’t mess with your elder’s claims. You hear me boy? You don’t do that.”
He shoved the door open to his desk really quickly and grabbed a stake and had raised it as Spike dodged out of the way and Buffy whipped Angel around saying, “If you want to invite a stake to play, I can promise you, I can dust you faster than you can dust my mate. So BACK OFF.”
Angel looked shocked as Spike finally spoke up saying, “I tried to fight the good fight with you. I tried to be civil to you and perhaps I failed, perhaps not. I’m not perfect, never claimed to be. I hope Buffy knows I’m not but I love the girl. I’ll take care of her until my dusting day. I trusted you as well and you betrayed my trust. I once told you that you were my Yoda and I meant it but you aren’t anymore. From this moment on until I feel better, I’m not a part of your family. So guess what twinkle toes, you really are alone. Enjoy that. Let’s go Buffy.”
He turned towards Buffy as she looked at Angel with sad eyes but said nothing as both of them left out of Angel’s office leaving him to brood. Spike looked at Buffy saying, “So pet, where do you want to go?”
Buffy smiled and said, “Let’s go find Willow. We have a witch to cheer up.”