“Spike, come out, please?” Buffy Summers pleaded with her best friend. “I wanna see!”
“No,” came the muffled sound of his voice from the other side of the bathroom door.
“Spike you have to come out sometime and I’m not leaving until you do so you may as well just come out now…”
“I look bloody ridiculous, Summers. Dru’s gonna laugh at me…”
“Well I can’t argue with you about that until I see what you look like so will you pleeeease come out?”
When he didn’t answer for a moment Buffy grew hopeful that maybe she’d finally gotten him to crack, but as soon as she thought she’d hear the door handle turn she heard him huff. “No.”
Buffy Summers and William Giles had been best friends since the fourth grade when his family moved from England to Sunnydale, California. Even at such a young age he had hated the dramatic change. Somehow, someway, they had become friends almost immediately.
One summer, after Williams mother Jenny died of Cancer, he had decided to completely re-vamp his entire look and attitude, on the outside, anyway. He wanted to get the attention of a girl, one Drusilla DeVille, who’s style was a bit… outlandish. It worked, and they’d been together ever since.
He changed his name that summer too. Rather than his friends calling him Will or William, he asked they call him Spike to help with his little transformation. They wanted to help him get what he wanted so they happily obliged. Buffy was the only one he allowed to call him by his real name. She didn’t do it often, but when she had a point to make or if she was having a heartfelt conversation with him she would use it. However, right now, trying to get him to come out of the bathroom, she decided to use it to her advantage.
“William Wesley Giles! Get your ass out of that bathroom this instant!” she demanded, stomping her foot for good measure.
Of course he couldn’t stay away or not listen to her when she did that. Even though they were nothing more than friends, she still had him wrapped hopelessly around her little finger.
Much to her satisfaction, Buffy heard the lock click out of place and watched as the doorknob turned. Suddenly the door swung open and Spike crossed his arms, looking away from her with pursed lips and shaking his head. He stood there in a maroon cap and gown, looking more pissed off than ever.
Buffy giggled at his facial expression. “You look fine.”
He looked at her and his nostrils flared. “No, I don’t. This this is ridiculous. I look like a bloody poufter.”
“Spike, all the guys have to wear it so quit whining. You really look fine.”
“At least you birds get to wear white. I look like a swollen penis…”
Buffy burst into laughter at that. “You do not, shut up.”
He huffed, then pouted. Buffy loved that pout, it was absolutlely adorable. She took a step forward, taking her white cap off, smoothing her honey-blonde hair. “I promise you, Spike, Dru is not gonna think you look stupid.”
“Yeah? How do you know?”
Buffy shrugged and half smiled. “It’s a girl thing.”
He uncrossed his arms and gestured toward her. “Yeah well, you’ll probably have Angel chasing after you all over again. You look incredible. So…”
“Grown up?” she offered in her most peppy tone of voice.
“Yeah,” he half-smiled.
They stared at each other for a few seconds just smiling at each other until Buffy snorted. “Please, Angel and I are so over, remember? If he even tries to speak to me-“
“I’ll pummel his arse?” Spike offered in all seriousness.
“Nooo,” she said and he pouted again. She smirked and put her cap back on. “You’ll stand back and smile with glee as I pummel his ass.”
Spike chuckled and pulled her into a hug. “Tha’s my girl.”
Buffy felt an overwhelming wave of guilt wash over her as he rocked her in a comforting embrace. She was really going to miss this.
Spike took a deep breath. “Alright,” he said pulling away from her and stretching. “Ready to go graduate?”
Buffy looked up into his cerulean blue eyes and couldn’t help but smile back at him. “Let’s do it.”
x X x X x
“Ladies and Gentlemen, The graduating class of 1999!”
After the ceremony all of the students scattered across the school yard in search of friends and relatives. Spike found Buffy first and wrapped his arms around her from behind, chuckling as she squeaked in surprise. Willow and Xander, their long time friends, appeared beside them moments later.
“Hey guys!” Buffy laughed as Spike set her down and she turned to face them. “Can you believe it? We graduated!”
“I know!” Willow exclaimed. “It feels like yesterday we were sitting in Miss Peadmont’s sixth grade class, flinging moist eraser chunks at Cordy and Harmony. And now look at us! It’s over already… it’s really kind of sad…”
Xander snorted. “Yeah, ‘cause you know, now we’re done with homework, nagging teachers, and Snyder? Man I’m gonna miss that guy…” he said with a thumbs up.
The gang laughed and Willow put her hands up in surrender. “Alright, point taken, noted.”
Suddenly Joyce Summers and Rupert Giles scurried up to the group and immediately began to blind them with flashing pictures like there was no tomorrow.
“Congratulations, kids!” Joyce exclaimed.
Buffy looked up at Spike smiling, and without a word spoken they immediately got together and posed for pictures. Joyce and Rupert looked at each other with knowing smiles and began to snap some more pictures, then waved the other two friends over for some more group photos.
After all the flashing stopped Buffy walked up to her mom who was holding her arms open, waiting for a hug. “I’m so proud of you, honey. Congratulations,” she said into her daughters hair.
“Thanks, mom.”
When they pulled apart Joyce kept her hands on Buffy’s upper arms and looked straight into her daughters eyes. “You haven’t told him yet, have you?” she asked quietly.
Buffy’s smile faded and the guilt returned, even heavier on her shoulders this time. She shook her head no.
Joyce nodded in understanding. “You need to tell him, sweetie. The longer you wait the more it’s gonna hurt, for both of you.”
“I know mom, I’ll tell him… just,” she turned and looked at her smiling friend. “Just not right now.”
x X x X x
Buffy paced back and forth in Spike's bedroom, waiting for him to return from whatever errand Mr. Giles had him running. It wasn’t unusual for her to be at his house waiting for him to get home, just like he would wait in her room for her if she wasn’t home.
Dru absolutely hated it, of course, but Buffy didn’t care. They were just friends and nothing more. Dru would always spark fights with him about it and for a few weeks he would stop showing up in Buffy’s room, but he wouldn’t tell her to stay out of his. Not too long after he would start showing up again, until Dru threw her next fit. It was a cycle they would go through, and Buffy grew sad thinking that the last time that happened was probably the last time it would ever happen.
She was incredibly nervous. She had really hoped she would be able to avoid having this conversation completely. Knowing how hard it was going to be for both of them. Her mother was right, though, the longer she waited the harder it was going to be, and more heart breaking. Already she felt like maybe she waited too long.
When she heard his car pull into the driveway her heart began to race. She really didn’t want to have to tell him this. He was going to be furious.
She sat on the end of his bed and fidgeted with her hands as she listened to his car door close, then as the front door opened and closed. She heard him start to climb the stairs, probably two at a time by the sound of it.
She knew him all too well.
He pushed open his bedroom door and his already luminous smile beamed brighter when he saw his best friend. She couldn’t help but smile back at him.
“Buffy,” he said kicking his boots off. “What’s up?”
She giggled. “You’re all glowy. What’s got you in such a good mood?”
He sighed and held his arms out. “Dru and I? We’re going all the way. She told me she wants to… you know…”
Buffy blushed and smiled. “Um, I’m happy for you, I guess,” she chuckled.
Great, a landmark in my best friends life and I won’t be here to help him bask in his glory…
“I’m nervous, Buffy. What if she changes her mind? Or, hell even worse, what if she doesn’t, but then thinks I’m horrible?”
“Well you know what you’re doing, right? You won’t do bad…” she said ducking her head and fidgeting with her hands again.
Spike noticed she was acting different and immediately felt guilty. Maybe he’d made her uncomfortable because of what happened in her relationship with Angel. “Did I make you uncomfortable? Should I talk to Xander about this? I’m a right git, Buffy, I’m sorry…”
“No, no it’s not that,” she said looking up at him with watery eyes. “There’s just, there’s something I need to tell you, and you’re not gonna be happy.”
Spike crossed his arms and looked down at her as she stood in front of him. “What’s wrong?”
Buffy took a deep breath and looked up at him. He wore a worried expression and Buffy immediately felt guilty about taking his glory moment away from him.
“Spike… I’m going away.”
He looked a little confused but not angry… yet. “For how long? Are you going somewhere with your mum?”
“No,” she said ducking her head for a moment, then looked back up at him. “I’m moving to L.A. to be with my dad,” she said and he immediately backed away and turned away from her. Buffy continued. “He got me a really good job working for his firm and since I’m not starting college right away-“
“Why didn’t you tell me about this when you were just offered it? How long have you known this, what were you doing?”
Buffy’s lip quivered. “A month,” she answered meakly.
Spikes eyes nearly bulged out of his head. “A month?! You’ve known for a sodden MONTH and you didn’t tell me? Buffy-“ he stopped and took a deep breath. “Why?”
She opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. She shook her head. “I don’t know, Spike, I’m so sorry.”
“When are you leaving?” he said angrily.
A tear dropped down Buffy’s cheek. “In a week,” she whispered.
He opened his mouth in astonishment and shook his head. “Buffy, I-“ he sighed and sat on the edge of his bed, rubbing his face in his hands. “How long are you going for?”
Buffy looked away from him, the shame and guilt even stronger than she thought it wouls be. “I don’t know. However long my dad needs me I guess…”
Spike raised his head, his eyes were red and slightly watery. He sighed. “I don’t even know what to say to you right now,” he said looking up at her.
She pursed her lips and nodded. She was so mad at herself for putting this off for so long. Just the look on Spike's face was enough to hate herself for keeping it from him for so long. Not knowing what to say to him she simply stepped over to where he was sitting, nestled her way in between his legs and wrapped her arms around him. “I’m so sorry Spike. I just didn’t know how to tell you.”
Spike sighed and leaned his head against her stomach, wrapping his long arms around her small torso. “You’re not gonna stay away right? You’ll come back and visit us?”
Buffy tilted her head to look at him and gave him a sad smile. “Of course. You know I won’t be able to stay away from my best friend.”
Spikes embrace with Buffy tightened and he swallowed hard. “Good.”
Buffy began to absent-mindedly stroke his hair. The two of them sat there in silence holding each other for a few minutes, not making a sound or flinching until Buffy started to giggle slightly.
Spike raised his eyebrows and loosened his grip. “Hm?”
“You’re roots are totally showing. You sealed the deal with Dru with icky roots?”
“Oi!” Spike sounded as Buffy backed away from him with a playful smile on her face. “I didn’t have to seal any bloody deal. She was practically begging for it,” he smirked. He puffed his chest out. “I’m all man and she knows it.”
Buffy snorted in laughter as she backed away from him. “Yeah, okay. Keep telling yourself that, Spikey.”
“Alright,” Spike stood and began to stalk toward her. “That’s it missy. You are one step away…”
Buffy couldn’t hide her smile nor could he as he got closer. “Oooh, I am sooo scared,” Buffy prodded.
Suddenly without a hint of warning Spike pounced on Buffy, pinning her hips between the desk behind her and his own. His fingers were on her in a flash, rubbing and poking at her rib cage in a flurry.
The bubbling laughter that floated from Buffy was contagious as Spike tickled her in her most ticklish spot. “Okay! Okay!” Buffy laughed, struggling for air. “I’m sorry! I know you’re all man! Okay! Stop!” she forced out.
She gulped for air as he finally backed off and walked into the bathroom that was right off his room. “You were warned, pet!” Spike yelled from inside the bathroom.
Buffy straightened her shirt and shook her head as she smiled more. Spike re-emerged from the bathroom holding a pair of latex gloves and a bottle of blonde hair dye. Buffy looked at the contents in his hands and quirked a brow. “Bleaching your hair now? Mr. Big-Bad?”
Spike smirked as he shoved the gloves and bottle into her hands and pulled his shirt up over his head. “Nope. You’re gonna do it for me.”
Buffy smiled as Spike playfully threw his shirt at her and walked back to the bathroom. She followed, and when he sat down on the edge of the bathtub she got an idea.
“Hey, let’s camp out in the tree fort tonight. Just you and me,” she offered.
“The tree fort…” Spike repeated.
“Yeah, it’ll be fun. Like old times…”
Spikes eyes saddened a bit. “You mean one last time, right?”
Buffy frowned. “Come on, don’t do that.”
Spike looked away, shaking his head. “I don’t think I have to tell you that I’m upset you’re leaving, especially with such short notice. It hurts.” Spike took a deep breath. “Just know that I’m expecting visits and you should expect them too.”
Buffy smiled sadly at him. “Deal.”
“Alright,” Spike said shifting a little. “Blonde me up, blondie.”
x X x X x
“Tell me again why I let you talk me into this?” Spike asked as he followed Buffy up the rickety old ladder into the tree fort.
“Because you love me and we need a night just me and you, and old memories…”
“Memories my arse… more like freezing nights and painful splinters…”
Buffy giggled as she pulled herself into the fort. “Stop whining. You love it out here and you know it.”
Spike hoisted a duffle bag up into the fort then pulled himself up next to Buffy. “True as that may be, pet, this got me into a lot of trouble with Dru. She didn’t quite fancy me spending a night alone with you out in the wilderness.”
Buffy snorted as she turned on the lantern and began to set up the sleeping bags. “Wilderness, huh? She considers the woods behind my house to be wilderness?”
“Well,” Spike began with a hint of guilt on his face. “She doesn’t exactly know where the tree fort is. Just that it’s private.”
“Uh oh… Lying to the girlfriend already?” Buffy tsk-ed.
Spike blushed a little as he too set up his sleeping bag. “She has nothing to worry about.”
Buffy looked over her shoulder at him with a twinge of hurt in her eyes but let it drop. She didn’t want to talk about Drusilla and her problems tonight. All she wanted was to have a fun night with her best friend, one last time, before she left.
“Okay,” Buffy said as she finished setting up her spot. She grabbed her bag and pulled out her moms old Polaroid camera, smiling. “Come here, it’s time for our picture!”
Spike looked over and groaned. “You and your bloody picture collection.”
“We have to! We have to take one for the box, it’s an important day for us!”
“It’s a bloody depressing day for us that’s what it is!”
She gave him a pointed look as he crawled up next to her, smirking. He scooted up close and Buffy leaned back against him for support.
Without a countdown or a prompt of 'cheese' the blonde duo smiled and Buffy snapped the picture. Both waited in silence for the picture to self-develop in front of them, and both were pleased with the outcome.
Behind a board in the tree fort wall Spike pulled out an old cash box while Buffy pulled a small key out of her pocket. The box Spike held contained years worth of pictures and small trinkets that Spike and Buffy cherished. Buffy quickly dated the back of the new picture and placed it in the box, closed it and locked it back up.
Spike looked down at the box, then over at his best friend, knowing in his gut that this would be the last time he got to do this with her.
x X x X x
Buffy looked around at her friends, sister, and mother who were standing around her, smiling and wishing her luck on her conquest.
Buffy, however, wasn’t smiling back as she looked around somewhat frantically. Her bags were at her feet and her bus ticket in her hand.
“Where the hell is he?” Buffy wondered out loud as she stomped her foot.
“Buffy,” Joyce scolded. “Language, please...”
“I’m sorry,” Buffy huffed. “But this bus is gonna leave and I’m not gonna get to say goodbye to him.”
“He’ll be here,” Willow soothed. “He would never miss being able to say goodbye to you.”
Tears formed in Buffy’s eyes as she looked around once more.
“Last call for the noon bus to Los Angeles!” an announcer for the station yelled over the loud speakers.
Buffy looked toward her mom, panicking. “Mom…”
“He’ll be here sweetie, don’t worry.”
“Are these bags yours, miss?” the bus loader asked. Buffy quickly nodded and he began to pack her things into the lower compartments of the bus.
Willow got a sinking feeling in her gut and she too began to look around nervously, hoping to catch a glimpse of their bleach blonde friend.
“Don’t worry, Buffster, you know he wouldn’t miss this,” Xander said, trying desperately to convince himself of the same thing.
Suddenly screeching tires grabbed everyone’s attention and Buffy couldn’t help but smile in relief. She didn’t have to see him, she knew it was him just from the sound of the old Desoto.
The car came into view and everyone’s faces suddenly matched Buffy’s as Spike stepped out of the car, out of breath and smiling.
On his way over to Buffy he broke into a run and scooped her up into his arms. Buffy released hot breath onto his neck as she fought back tears. “I thought you weren’t coming.”
Spike clenched his jaw and hugged her just a little bit tighter. “I would never miss the chance to see you and you know that.”
“Excuse me, miss?” an employee of the bus station tapped her shoulder, interrupting Buffy and Spikes moment. Buffy looked up at the young man, knowing what he was about to say. “If you don’t get on the bus now it’s going to leave without you.”
Buffy nodded and looked up at Spike who smiled sadly down at her. The look on his face broke her heart all over again.
“You, um,” he began. “You better call your mum first, but call me when you’re all unpacked and settled in, yeah?”
Buffy nodded and placed a hand on his cheek, looking deep into his cerulean blue eyes. “I’ll miss you, William.”
Spike pursed his lips and tears threatened to form. He pulled her into an air-tight hug and couldn’t help but feel that he was letting go of the one person who kept him sane these last ten years.
Buffy sniffled and Spike let go, holding her hand as she walked over to the rest of the group for hurried goodbyes. Spike watched her eyes tear up as she kissed and hugged everyone goodbye. He hated this. Hated that she was leaving her friends and family. Hated she was leaving her beloved hometown. Hated that she was leaving him. It would have been impossible to try and hide his disappointment if he’d wanted to.
Finally Buffy gave her mother and sister a long hug goodbye before Spike helped her up onto the first step of the waiting bus. He squeezed her hand and she turned to look at him, tears in her eyes.
Spike cleared his throat and pulled her into one last hug. “You come back now, you hear? I won’t have you being a ghost in this bloody town.”
Buffy nuzzled his neck slightly. “I’ll be back, I promise. I love you too much to stay away forever,” she chuckled.
“Yeh,” Spike laughed as he let her go, trying hard not to get too sappy. “We’ll see about that, Summers.”
Buffy smiled as she continued up into the bus. “I’ll call you when I get there.”
Spike nodded and stuffed his hands into his pockets as the bus doors shut behind her and she hurried to her seat, quickly sitting and looking sadly out the window at all her loved ones who all took deep breaths as the bus started to slowly pull away.
Buffy forced a smile and placed a hand on the window, watching sadly as she got farther and farther away from her mother, sister, and friends. The last person she laid her eyes on was Spike.
He stood, hands stuffed in his pockets and looking as if someone had just ran over his dog. He quickly mouthed the words I love you right before the bus turned the corner and blocked her friends from her sight.
It felt like someone had slammed a brick against her chest as the image of Spike whispering I love you flashed before her eyes. Originally the idea of moving to L.A. seemed like a good one. Now she wasn’t so sure.
As the bus moved forward Buffy took a deep breath and wiped her eyes, reminding herself that she wasn’t going away forever, she just was moving forward with her life, and it was something she needed to do.
She shifted in her seat and got more comfortable for the drive ahead of her just in time to read the old familiar sign with a new sense of self.
Now Leaving Sunnydale.