Chapter 19
The next week was a blur. The funeral planning, the phone calls, the actual funeral…it had all been planned with some of her input, but she was running on autopilot. Her father had been by every day, but at night, Spike stayed with her and held her, because he was afraid to leave her alone just yet.
Buffy had stayed home from school that entire week, and Spike had stayed home too.
“You didn’t have to miss school all week just for me.”
“I wanted to be here,” he said quietly. “I knew you needed someone, and with your dad working, I thought…”
“Thank you,” she said gently. “For being here with me. For helping me get through this. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” She looked down at her belly. She was wearing one of her normal, form fitting T-shirts, and there was the very faintest hint of a baby belly beginning to form. She was four weeks pregnant, and she had yet to tell her father about the pregnancy.
“You won’t have to find out,” he assured her. “I’m here for you. Always. You know that, right?”
“Yeah, I know.” She blinked back tears. “It’s gonna be ok. I just…I have to get through the bad stuff first. This is just…there’s so much.”
“I know, luv.”
Over the past week, Angel had been released from the hospital and immediately arrested for driving while intoxicated. His father had tried to bail him out, but the judge had ordered Angel to be locked up until statements were issued. Buffy had issued her statement on the events of that night, and so had Spike. She wasn’t sure who else had been questioned, but she was looking forward to putting that awful evening behind her for good.
“You know he’s going to want to take me with him,” Buffy whispered. It was the first time any of them had mentioned it all week. But they both knew. Hank was going to want to take his daughter with him to New York, and she was going to have to leave everything behind. The thought of leaving now was even worse, because she couldn’t stand the thought of giving up the home she’d grown up in or not being able to visit her mother’s grave when she was ready to do so. “He’s leaving soon, Spike.”
“Shh,” Spike assured her. “We’ll deal to that if the time comes.”
“I don’t want to leave you.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“You can’t. The band…everything, Spike.”
“There’s nothing for me here if you’re gone, Buffy. Oz would understand. And as for college? Right now it’s not looking so good for me.” He caressed her cheek. “I go where you go, ok?”
“You don’t…”
“Yes I do,” he interrupted. “You’re my life, Buffy. You’re all I’ve got, ok?” Buffy closed her eyes, but her tears continued to fall. “I love you, and I’m gonna make sure we stay together.” At that, the doorbell rang, and Buffy glanced at Spike. She was the first one up off the couch, so she answered the door.
“Dad?”
“Hi, honey. Is it ok, my dropping by like this?”
“Yeah. I…I guess that’s ok. Um, come in.” She looked around, surprised that he still hadn’t brought Dawn by, but she was relieved at the same time. She still wasn’t sure she was ready to meet the child quite yet.
“Thanks,” he said graciously, stepping into the house. Spike was still seated on the couch, and Hank gave him a small wave.
“Mr. Summers,” Spike said with a nod. Things had been civil over the past week. Everybody had been stepping on eggshells around Buffy, and while Spike was still worried that Hank might hurt his daughter again, she seemed to be relieved to have him around.
“I came to talk to the both of you,” Hank said quietly. “Spike, I know you’re dating my daughter, so I thought you should hear this too, as it concerns the both of you.”
“Dad? W-what’s going on?”
“Just have a seat, Buffy.” Buffy sat down next to Spike, and Hank pulled up a chair nearby. “As you know, my company transferred me to New York City.” Buffy’s shoulders fell.
“Dad…”
“Just listen, Buffy.” He cleared his throat. “Your mother wanted you to stay here and finish out high school. Then, of course, everything changed.” He felt guilty at the pain in Buffy’s eyes. “I don’t think it would be wise to take you away from home right now. After everything you’ve been through, you need some normalcy.”
“You mean…I can stay?”
“Yeah. You don’t have to go anywhere, Buffy.”
“Oh God,” she breathed. “Thank you so much, Dad.” Hank nodded.
“I told my company I’m not going to New York.”
“What?!”
“I told them that I needed to stay in California. I told them everything that happened, and they agreed. They’re sending a colleague of mine in my place.”
“But Dad…it’s a great opportunity, and…”
“And I can take it some other time, Buffy. I’m staying in Sunnydale.” He cleared his throat. “Only there’s one thing…”
“What?”
“I don’t know how you feel about this, but I don’t feel comfortable with you staying here by yourself. I know Spike has his own apartment. I want to move back in, Buffy. Either that, or I want you to move into my place.”
“Dad…”
“I don’t want you to be alone. You’re still seventeen, you don’t have a job, and you need to concentrate on school before worrying about anything else.” Buffy and Spike shared surprised glances.
“I don’t want to leave my home, Dad. I grew up here. This was Mom’s house too, and…” She sighed heavily. As angry as she’d been with her father in the past, she knew that if she agreed to let him move in, he’d be more cooperative with other things in the future. She hoped, anyway. “You…you can use Mom’s sewing room for Dawn if you want. She’ll need a place to stay.”
“Are you sure about this, Buffy?”
“I don’t really have a choice, do I? I can’t make mortgage payments. I can’t…”
“Ok,” Hank said quietly. “I don’t want to push anything on you. I just want you to know that I’m here for you. I want you to feel safe.”
“Thanks,” Buffy said quietly. She glanced at Spike and he nodded to her. “In that case, I need to tell you something. Mom knew…I just hadn’t gotten around to telling you yet.”
“What is it?” Hank wondered. Buffy sighed heavily looked at Spike.
“I’m pregnant. Spike and I…we’re having a baby.” She glanced back at her father who looked as if he wasn’t sure he’d heard correctly.
“You’re…what?”
“I know it’s scary. I know I’m young. But I’m about four weeks along, and…and Mom was freaked, but she said I could stay here. If you don’t want me to, I can move in with Spike, and…”
“No,” Hank said quietly. “I’m…I’m not going to tell you I’m thrilled, because I’m not, but you’re still my little girl, and…and…”
“Dad, it’s ok. You can yell.”
“No. I can’t. I don’t think I have much of a right to yell about anything right now. Four weeks…that puts you getting pregnant around the time your mother and I told you about the divorce.” He shook his head. “Well, now I suppose I know how you dealt with it.”
“Mr. Summers,” Spike interjected, “I’m going to take care of her. I’m not going to walk away, and I want you to know that. I’m not leaving.”
“I hope that’s true, Spike.” Hank stood up. “I…I need to get home to Dawn. I need to think about this.”
“Dad?”
“Sweetheart, I’m not angry with you. I’m just…”
“Disappointed.”
“I don’t know. After everything that’s happened, I’m not sure that my teenaged daughter being pregnant is the end of the world.” He placed his hands on her shoulder. “You’ve always been strong, Buffy. And I’m gonna try to be strong too, ok?” Buffy nodded slowly. “Everything that’s happened…I’m gonna try to make it up to you.”
Buffy couldn’t say anything. He’d taken it much better than she’d expected, though he had a point. After the week they’d had, it was obvious there were worse things than an almost eighteen year old being pregnant.
“I’ll call you in the morning, ok? We’ll make plans.”
“Ok,” Buffy said quietly. “Good night.”
“Good night, sweetheart.”
When Hank was gone, Buffy turned to Spike who looked quite surprised.
“Wasn’t expecting that,” he said slowly. “Figured he might somehow conjure up a shot gun and put a hole in my chest.”
“I know. I kinda expected him to freak out, but I guess he has a point. With mom being gone now…my being pregnant isn’t…well…it’s still scary, but…well, you know what I mean.”
“I do,” he said softly.
“And that’s why I love you so much.” Buffy pulled her arms around Spike and rested her head on his shoulder.
“I love you too, pet. Always will.”
***
On Saturday morning, after Buffy had talked to her father on the phone for about an hour, making plans for his move back home, she and Spike took off to spend the day together having fun. They were currently seated in his car, driving downtown, heading off toward the park to take a walk. It was probably one of the last nice days of the season, and they wanted to enjoy every minute of it.
“Are you sure you’re ok with your dad coming back? Especially with Dawn?”
“I really don’t have much of a choice. I’m angry with him for what happened, but he’s the only parent I have left, and he does love me.” She sighed heavily. “This doesn’t make any sense, Spike. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.”
“Nothing ever turns out the way we expect it too.” He squeezed her hand.
“You haven’t heard back from your dad?”
“I don’t think there was much else for him to say aside from cutting me off,” Spike muttered. “Got a show tonight, and they expect a big crowd, so I should get paid pretty well.”
“Spike,” Buffy said softly, “maybe you should try talking to him again.”
“Talking to him about what? About how he has to give me money because I’m his son? You’re lucky your father’s willing to move home and help you out. After the divorce, my father apparently turned into the world’s largest prick. Wrote me checks every month, and he thought that counted as good parenting.” He cleared his throat and looked at Buffy, who was now staring out the window. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah. I’m ok.”
“I’m sorry, luv. I shouldn’t pour all this out on you right now.”
“No, it’s ok. I don’t mind. Really.” She placed her hand on his knee. “I know you know what I’m going through. You’ve been here.”
“Yeah,” he said quietly, placing his hand over hers. “I’m gonna make you a promise, Buffy.”
“A promise?”
“Yeah.” He kept his eyes on the road. “No matter what, our baby is never gonna have to wonder if his parents love him or if they care. He’s always going to have us. We might not have a lot of money, and we might not know what the bloody hell we’re doing, but we’ll make it work, because we’re a family.”
“Family,” Buffy murmured, smiling sadly and leaning back against the seat. She’d never had to think about her family without her mother before. All of those images of her first baby baking cookies with grandma or dancing around goofily with grandma as she’d done with her mother as a child were all gone. “Spike?”
“Yeah?”
“If it’s a girl…I’d like to name her after my mom.”
“Joyce?”
“No,” Buffy smiled. “My mom once told me she didn’t really like her name as a kid. She insisted people call her ‘Joy’ until she was fifteen.”
“Joy Pratt,” Spike said with a smile. “I like that. So you think it’s a girl?”
“I don’t know yet. My gut tells me it’s a boy, but of course, that could be the morning sickness.” She grinned a little, and Spike’s heart swelled. He loved seeing her smile. He knew there were going to be good days and bad, but he was going to help her through it. That was a promise he made to himself.
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Chapter End Notes:
Thanks for the feedback so far! In other fandoms in the past, I've asked the readers for their input...things they'd like to see happen in the story, things that don't normally happen in fan fic that they'd like to see. And it's usually a success, so I'd like to ask you all if there's anything you feel that's missing from the story. I've already been told that this feels more like a Buffy-centric story, rather than a Spuffy centric, so I'm going to try to keep Spike more in the front rather than just a (literally) supporting character. Let me know what you think!