Chapter 29
Buffy lay awake in the middle of the night, her hands spread out on her belly, feeling her little kicker moving around. She was amazed he even had the room to move around, considering he was due in less than three months.
“Go to sleep, baby,” she muttered. “Mommy has an English test in the morning.” Of course, the baby didn’t listen. So, she sat up in bed, threw off the covers, and got out of bed. As she was heading toward the stairs to go down to the kitchen for a glass of water, she heard whimpering coming from Dawn’s room.
Frowning, she moved to lean against the door, trying to hear better.
“Mommy,” the little girl cried. Buffy chewed on her lower lip and opened the door. Dawn was lying on her stomach in the bed, crying into her pillow.
“Dawnie?” Dawn sat up quickly.
“Buffy?” she sniffled.
“What’s wrong, Dawn? Did you have a bad dream?”
“Uh-huh,” she cried, brushing the tears off her face.
“Want me to tell you a story?” Buffy offered, moving across the room.
“No,” Dawn cried. Her long, brown hair was a mess, and Buffy smoothed it back for her. “Can I sleep in your room?”
“Dawn…”
“Please?” One thing Dawn had going for her was the fact that those beautiful, sad eyes could get her anything she wanted if the moment called for it.
“Alright, but don’t hog the covers, ok?” Dawn nodded and hurried out of her room. Buffy went downstairs, got a drink of water, used the bathroom, and by the time she got back to her room, Dawn was asleep under her covers.
Shaking her head, Buffy got in too and pulled the covers over her bulge of a stomach. With a sigh, she closed her eyes and tried to focus on going back to sleep, but the baby was too active. She couldn’t wait until July when the baby came. Of course, it was scary to think that she was going to be a mother soon, and she didn’t have a clue as to what she was supposed to do, but she was ready for the pregnancy part to be over with.
She turned her head to peer over at her little sister. God, she was so innocent and young, and Buffy still couldn’t believe this little girl was part of her blood. They were sisters, and Buffy considered Dawn her sister, as much as she hadn’t really wanted to in the beginning. After all these months, she was pretty sure that life without Dawn would be quite different.
“Sleep tight, kiddo,” she murmured, kissing the top of the little girl’s head. She closed her eyes and hoped sleep would pull her under soon.
***
A few nights later, Buffy, Spike, Dawn, and Hank were all seated around the dinner table. Everyone was full and sitting around talking now. Buffy and her dad were talking about school, while Dawn related the events of her day to Spike.
Suddenly, however, Hank cleared his throat.
“Dad?”
“Dawn, why don’t you go upstairs and feed Mr. Fish Face?” Mr. Fish Face was Dawn’s new pet goldfish that she’d won at a street carnival.
“Ok!” Dawn said excitedly, hurrying out of the dining room and up the stairs.
“What’s going on?” Buffy wondered.
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you both, but I thought that maybe we’d better talk without Dawn. You know how excited she gets sometimes,” Hank pointed out.
“Ok,” Buffy said slowly. “What’s going on?”
“Well, I know the both of you have been working very hard making money for when the baby arrives. I also know that Spike, your father’s going to stop helping you once you graduate.” Spike looked down.
“That’s right,” he confirmed.
“Look, I’m not stupid. I know Spike crawls into your window at night, Buffy. I mean, I might be older than you, but I have ears.”
Buffy’s eyes bulged, and she blushed.
“I…”
“Look, with the baby coming, and with Spike’s band recording, I think the best thing is for you to live together.” He cleared his throat. “So, Spike, if you’d like, you can move in here. You can pay rent, but I’ll only ask half of what your father is helping you with now.”
“Mr. Summers, that’s really generous of you, but…”
“But you want to take care of yourself,” Hank said with a nod. “I get that. It’s just…you’re both very young, and I want you to get out on your own when you can, but when the baby comes, you’re going to need help. Spike, depending on what you decide, you’re going to be busy with the band, and Buffy will be busy with school.”
“Dad,” Buffy interrupted, “I could move in with Spike.”
“I know you’re an adult Buffy, but until you graduate high school, I’d prefer it if you lived under my roof.”
“Dad…”
“If after you graduate, you want to find a place of your own, I’ll be happy to help you move. I just don’t want you to have to worry or stress right now. The baby’s due soon, and graduation’s just around the corner. You both need stability, and I think you’ll have that more if you live here than if you’re out there struggling on your own.”
“Mr. Summers…”
“Spike, the offer stands. I know you want to do what’s right for your family. You’re a good man. I just think that the two of you are going to need each other more than ever with these new changes going on. I think it’s the best thing for the baby.”
“You actually want my boyfriend to live here?”
“You’re eighteen. He’s eighteen. As long as you keep the displays of affection to a Y rating while Dawn’s around, I don’t have a problem with the two of you sharing a room.”
“Ok, where’s my dad and what’d you do with him?” Buffy asked. “You’re actually insisting that Spike moves in here and sleeps in my room?”
“There’s always the couch or the basement, which I’d actually prefer, but you’re both adults, and I think it’s ridiculous to insist on two people who are about to be parents together not to share the same bed.”
Buffy’s eyes widened, and she glanced at Spike.
“That’s really nice of you,” Spike said quietly, “but I wouldn’t want to…”
“I’m offering, Spike,” Hank insisted. “I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it. It would just be for a few months. That way you can save half of your father’s check and maybe have enough for a down payment on a nice place for you, Buffy and the baby.”
Buffy took Spike’s hand, giving it a little squeeze. She knew that he’d been on his own for months now, but she couldn’t deny the fact that it would be so much nicer to lay down with him at night without having to worry about what time he snuck out so her father wouldn’t catch him.
“Alright,” Spike finally agreed. “I guess we can give it a go.”
***
Spike yawned tiredly as he helped the band pack up after a late performance at The Bronze. Buffy had dropped Spike off and had gone on to work, and she was coming by after her shift ended to pick him up. He still had a while, so he hung out back stage while another band performed.
“You leaving, Oz?” Spike asked, as Willow stood expectantly at the stage door.
“Yeah. Willow’s helping me with a paper tonight. You waiting on Buffy?”
“Yeah. She gets off work in a few minutes, and then she’s coming to get me.”
“Well, have fun, man. See you Monday.” Spike nodded and waved Oz off. He sat down and opened up his notebook in which he generally scribbled lyrics down.
“Anybody back here?” Spike looked up to see a somewhat familiar face peeking through the curtains.
“Uh, yeah,” he said slowly. “But you can come back. It’s just me.”
“Hey, you’re the lead singer of The Dingoes, aren’t you?” He looked at the girl. Tall, great figure, provocatively dressed.
“You’re Faith, right?”
“How’d you know?”
“I’ve seen you before. You’re Xander Harris’ cousin.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m Spike.”
“Spike,” she said, eyes widening in recognition. “You’re the guy that bailed on me when Xander didn’t want to take me around town, huh?”
“I had other plans,” he said quietly, thinking back to the night he and Buffy made love for the first time since, well, their first time. “But from what I heard, you had a pretty good time that night anyway.”
“Yeah,” Faith smirked. “It was a good party.” She moved toward him. “You were pretty good up there.”
“Thanks.”
“You been singing long?”
“Not really,” Spike shrugged. “But apparently somebody likes us. We’re working on an album.”
“Really? That’s pretty sweet.”
“Yeah,” Spike agreed, looking around her. “Are you looking for someone, or…”
“Nah, I was just getting away from the crowd. It’s fun for a while, but sometimes it’s nice to take a break, you know?”
“Yeah, I know,” he agreed, glancing at his watch.
“You expecting somebody?”
“Yeah. My girlfriend,” he pointed out. Faith nodded slowly.
“Right. Well, it’s too bad you’re taken, because there’s gonna be a lot of girls throwing themselves at you when you become a big success.”
“Well, I’ve got everything I need at home, thanks,” he muttered, turning his attention back to his lyric book. Faith smiled a little and turned around.
“You sure about that?” She leaned against the doorframe, shirt riding up her sides just in the right places. Spike cleared his throat. “’Cause what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”
“I’m flattered, but…”
“Yeah, you’re taken. I got it.” She smirked and shook her head. “It’s a shame.” With that, she turned and walked away, swishing her hips from side to side as she went back out into the crowd. Sighing and shaking his head, Spike went back to writing in his lyric book, patiently awaiting Buffy’s arrival.
***
“Oh God!” she cried out against his shoulders as he slammed into her, bringing her into her third orgasm of the night. Her nails dug into his shoulders, and he muffled a roar against her neck, spilling warm jets of his come inside of her, while her slick walls trembled around him.
Minutes later, he pulled out of her and lay back on the bed beside her. She sighed softly and bit her lip, turning her head to look at him.
“That was…wow.”
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” he asked quickly, turning to his side.
“No! That was…I thought maybe you were too tired or…”
“Never too tired for you, luv,” Spike promised, kissing Buffy’s soft, pink lips. “Love you.”
“Love you too,” she grinned. She took a deep breath and groaned softly when the baby kicked her.
“S’wrong?”
“Baby’s gonna keep me up all night again. I just know it.” Spike placed his hand on her belly, feeling his child moving inside his mother’s stomach.
“Come with me.”
“Huh?”
“Don’t wanna wake your dad or Dawn.” He helped her out of bed, and they both slipped into their night wear. Well, Spike pulled on a pair of shorts, considering he usually slept naked. He then took her hand, grabbed his guitar case, and led Buffy into the hall, down the stairs, into the kitchen, and down into the basement. He flicked the light on and led her over to a cot against the wall. “Here…”
Buffy lowered herself down with a little “oof” escaping as her weight shifted. Spike chuckled and sat down next to her on the cot. He began to strum at his guitar, plucking out chords he’d learned. He wasn’t the best guitar player yet, but he was learning quickly.
Buffy smiled, recognizing the acoustic version of a song she’d heard years ago, and he melted her heart just a little when he began to sing.
“Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face”
Buffy cradled her stomach in her hands and leaned against the wall, rocking slowly back and forth as Spike watched her and smiled.
“With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open”
He fell in love with her all over again, watching tears begin to form beneath her lashes. She smiled, her lower lip trembling, and he looked down at her stomach, picturing his son or daughter in his mind. He couldn’t decide if the baby would look like him or like Buffy, but either way, the thought of this child made his heart swell with pride. He was going to be someone’s father for the rest of his life.
“Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, I'll take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life”
Buffy watched as Spike swallowed a lump in his throat, and she reached out, placing her hand on his shoulder as he played. She felt the baby calming down within her, which usually tended to happen when he heard Spike’s voice.
“With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open
I'll show you everything ...oh yeah
With arms wide open..wide open”
Buffy closed her eyes again, listening to Spike’s soothing voice, feeling all of her worries melt away. She wondered if others felt this same way when he sang. Like he was singing right to their soul. Like he knew exactly what they needed to hear.
She watched as his gaze drifted back to her belly, and she smiled, stroking small circles there when felt a foot nudge her. She giggled a little but didn’t say a word, as Spike finished out the song.
“If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he's not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open...”
She wondered how true those words rang to Spike. Did he really not believe he had those same opportunities? It broke her heart to think that he didn’t know where his life was going. She didn’t want to be the one to hold him back, but at the same time, but she couldn’t lose him. Not after everything they’d been through.
“With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open
I'll show you everything..oh yeah
With arms wide open....wide open”
When he finished out the guitar part, the basement grew silent. And then Buffy’s tears led to a choked sob, and Spike felt guilty immediately.
“What’s wrong, luv?” he asked, taking her hands in his.
“I don’t know. I’m sorry. It’s just…hormones.” She sniffled. “That was beautiful.” She looked down at her belly. “I think he’s sleeping now.” She swallowed hard and looked away, but he placed his fingers under chin and turned her head so she’d look at him.
“Talk to me.”
“I’m ok…really. I just…”
“Don’t talk to me as your boyfriend. Or as the father of your baby. Talk to me as your best friend. I’m still him, remember?” Buffy smiled a little and wiped away a tear, nodding.
“You’re amazing, you know that?” she asked. “You’ve been here for me, and you’re doing all this for our family. I just…I feel like I’m holding you back?”
“What?” He cocked his head to the side. “How could you even think that, luv? You’re everything to me, and you know that.”
“I…don’t want to tell you what to do.”
“I know that.”
“I know you’re still deciding what you want to do, but…Spike, listening to you? The way you sing with everything you have…there’s no doubt in my mind. You’re a singer, Spike. This is who you are, and I know you’ve been writing songs and practicing, even when you’re not at practice. I know you joined the band because you thought it’d be good for our family, but I’ve watched you, Spike. I know you love it, and I know this is what you want.” Spike looked away. “No, hey. Look at me.” She sniffled and placed her hand against his cheek. “If this is what you want, we’ll make it work. Ok?”
“It’ll be hard being away from you.”
“It won’t be all of the time. And I’ll come with you when I can. This is what you need, Spike. I know it.” She leaned in and kissed him. “And I’m going to be the fattest groupie in the audience, but I don’t care, because I know you’ll be singing to me.” She grinned at him, and he smiled back.
“You’re amazing, Buffy,” he whispered, leaning in to kiss her.
“Yeah,” she smiled, shrugging as she squeezed his hand. “What are best friends for, anyway?”
Song Credit: With Arms Wide Open by Creed
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