Morning found the three lovers entwined on the large circular bed. Sun filtered in through the specially treated glass, gently warming their exposed skin. Angel woke first, and watched over his lovers as they slept.
The previous day’s events had his mind filled with thoughts of their future, with hope. He loved them both, he wanted whatever this was to continue, but he’d begun to worry about his curse. He was happy, very happy. He had had the Wolfram & Hart mystics work on that months ago, and had been assured that his soul was anchored and there was no way happiness would make him lose his soul again. He’d never been able to put it to the test, however. The previous night had been amazing, but was still nervous. He’d been unsure of how Buffy would react, how she would look at him after she’d seen him with Spike. Lying on the bed, with Buffy between him and the other vampire, he reached out to touch them both. He feared losing that more than anything he had ever wanted. Lost in his thoughts, he drifted off again.
Spike had felt Angel’s gentle touch, and was aware he had been awake. When the brunet didn’t say anything, Spike realized that he’d fallen back to sleep.
Buffy was spooned against him, her scented hair just a couple of inches from his nose, her naked body molded to his, her warmth drawing him to her like a magnet. She had one hand on Angel’s chest, touching them both, needing to know they were near.
He couldn’t remember a time when he’d felt more at peace, more fulfilled, more loved. He was nervous that one of them might change their minds, but the memory of the previous night would be with him forever. He reached across Buffy, lightly touching Angel’s face as he nestled closer to the woman between them. That was where he would stay forever if he could. He closed his eyes and went to sleep again.
Buffy’s eyes opened shortly after. She remained completely still, as she remembered where she was and who she was with. Shocked by everything that had taken place, she replayed the events in her mind. She remembered the feelings she’d experienced while she’d witnessed the tenderness of the two men together; even with the Domination/Submission she’d noticed something she’d never seen before. Each man had given the other what he needed, never crossing lines, always completely aware of the other’s feelings. Yes, Angel had been dominated by Spike and in a way, by herself, but it had been handled in a way that worked. Spike knew them both, maybe better than they knew themselves. He had orchestrated the entire thing; the house, the union, a possible solution. Would it work? Could she live with those two vampires as a trio, the three of them as lovers? Could she deal with how her friends would look at her, knowing she was sleeping with both of them? Would Angel’s curse be a problem? She had so many questions that needed answers.
She scooted to the middle of the bed, lying on her back, and again placed a hand on each of them, hoping they would wake. She wanted to discuss things, but first, she wanted them. She wanted to feel them touch her once more. She craved them, and wondered if she would ever be happy with anyone else after the night she’d shared with them.
Her hands moved lower down their torsos, searching for the manly parts she longed to have inside her. She wondered if they would wake up soon, or if she would have to start without them.
Taking a cock in each hand, she slowly began to stroke them. With their vampiric senses, her arousal was surely evident to them already.
Angel opened his eyes, but said nothing, letting Buffy continue her movements. Her hot little hand had him hard with her first touch. He turned his head to her, letting her know he was awake, and smiling to let her know he was enjoying it.
Spike moaned softly as she stroked him awake. “Good morning Kitten. Do you want to play with us this fine morning, or are you going to get a ruler out?”
Both Buffy and Angel giggled at his question.
“Well, now, a ruler might not be a bad idea, childe.” Angel smiled playfully at Spike.
Buffy had other plans. “No need for rulers boys. I know you guys have what it takes to do the job.”
Spike’s hand began to caress Buffy’s hardened nipple closest to him. “So, did you have something special in mind, pet? ‘Cause if you need suggestions, just ask.” He leaned forward to close his lips around her nipple, and sucked hard.
Buffy moaned loudly and pumped her hands faster on their hard cocks.
Angel rolled to his side slowly, so that Buffy wouldn’t stop as well as to be able to spread her legs and finger her ever dampening sex.
Buffy spread her legs wide, encouraging them both to explore her body.
Spike continued to tease her nipple with his tongue while his hand joined Angel’s, circling her clit with his fingertips, while Angel pumped two fingers in and out of her.
She was in ecstasy. Her mind was made up. She would never want another. These were her vampires, her men, her lovers. The things they did to her, the simplest of touch sent electrical sparks through her.
But wait! “Stop!”
The guys sat up in bed, panicked by Buffy’s outburst. Had she decided that she didn’t want to be a part of this? Their faces showed fear and sadness at the possibility of loss.
“No, it’s not that. I want you both. I do.” She turned to Angel. “But if you feel anything like I do right now, I am scared to death that you will lose your soul. Angel, we need to figure out what we can do to fix this curse before you get too happy.” Buffy hung her head, ashamed that she had gotten everyone—including herself—all worked up.
Angel looked at her, softened by her tears. “Buffy, I never would have agreed to play last night if I thought there was a chance of losing my soul. I had the mystics at Wolfram & Hart work on anchoring my soul to something else as one of my first projects as CEO. Now, it’s anchored to my unlife. Should I dust, the soul shall too. It was a simple twist of words within the spell.” Angel’s face clouded. “But, I haven’t tested it. I could never have tested it—” he paused, taking a deep breath and releasing it. “Until now. You two are what makes me happy; nothing else.”
Spike and Buffy’s matching looks of surprise and excitement warmed him, but he had one more thing to say.
“But, if the mystics were wrong for any reason, one of you will have to kill me. Angelus cannot be allowed near either of you. Do we have an agreement?”
Buffy nodded; shocked that she would actually be able to make love to Angel. He would be able to participate in this arrangement fully.
Spike reached across the bed and punched him in the shoulder. “It would be an honor to kill that bastard, should he decide to ever show his face again. Now, I do believe our lady was hoping for some playtime with us before brekkie. Are you up for it? Or do you want to eat first?”
Angel rubbed his arm, a wry smile on his face. “Ah, Spike, how did I know I could count on you to volunteer to do the staking? Now, where were we? I am feeling hungry, but breakfast is the furthest thing from my mind, right this instant.”
Buffy smiled widely as her lovers resumed their ministrations. She arched her back, pressing her body into their hands, their mouths. Her hunger for them ruled her thoughts; she wanted them, needed them.
“Spike… Angel…” she said between her panting. “I want you both so badly.”
Spike spoke to her lustily, while licking her neck. “Pet, you have us. For now, forever, for anything you need or want.”
Looking at her hooded eyes, Angel asked her, “Tell us, Buffy. What do you want?” He secretly hoped she would feel comfortable having sex with him and Spike without fear or games. He enjoyed the games, but he longed to have tender moments with them both.
Buffy, in her highly aroused state, struggled to form her words. I’ll just show them.
She had thought of this scenario more times than she’d ever admit to anyone, but she knew exactly what she wanted. Her heart was full of love for those two men; now she wanted her body full too.
Buffy maneuvered her body so that she was straddling Angel. “Spike, I want you behind me.” As Spike joined her straddling Angel’s thighs, he placed his hands on her waist and lifted her enough so that Angel could position himself at her entrance. Slowly, with Spike’s help, she lowered herself onto Angel.
She remembered Angel’s tenderness the night she gave him her virginity. Buffy had longed to recreate those feelings she’d felt she’d lost so long ago. The love she saw in Angel’s eyes brought tears to her own. She’d always loved him, no matter how hard she tried to erase his memory. The slow, steady sex she was experiencing was something new. She was making love.
Sensations and emotions overwhelmed her. She needed Spike. Still joined intimately with Angel, she leaned back against Spike’s chest. The cool silkiness of his skin ignited a fire deep in her soul. She’d loved Spike for so long, afraid to admit it to herself. Her arm reached behind, pulling him closer.
“I love you,” she panted out. “Touch me…I need to feel more of you.”
Angel’s hands replaced Spike’s on her hips, allowing Spike to honor her request.
Spike had waited so long to hear her speak those words; to know she meant them. He had been in love with her for so long, feeling as though she might never return the feelings, but trying to never lose hope.
His hands palmed her firm breasts, letting her back slide against his chest as she rode Angel, her sweat slicked skin gliding against their cool skin, her heat radiating and warming them both. Spike’s erection filled the soft crevice of her behind, her wetness spreading and allowing him to move smoothly between the cheeks of her ass.
Her soft panting filled the room. Buffy wanted them both, filling her with their cocks, surrounding her with their love.
“Angel… I… Need… The… Lube.” Buffy stilled her movements letting him reach for the discarded tube on the floor. He handed it to Spike’s waiting hand.
Spike dripped the cool gel in between those cheeks, coating his cock as it rubbed along her hole. With each upward thrust, she bucked against him. He backed up, used his cockhead to tease her opening. The previous night’s activities had broken her in nicely, but he was still careful. He tested her by slipping in the tip, and her muscles tightened pushing him out. She moaned and pressed back against him, grinding against Angel in the process.
“Please, Spike. I need you…” Buffy was panting and trying to go slow. She was on the edge of orgasm, and wanted them both to join her.
Spike eased his cock in, still careful of her sensitive skin.
He spread her cheeks, letting some spit trickle down on his cock as he slowly slid inside.
Buffy moaned loudly, at the fullness. She hadn’t expected it to feel so satisfying, but was suddenly lost in desire. She sped up her motion on Angel, his hands steadying her as she wantonly began to ride them both.
Angel watched Buffy’s eyes close as her body danced nakedly above his. He saw Spike looking at him, lust and adoration beaming from his eyes. They were together, as never before; bodies and souls rapidly becoming one.
Spike could feel their bodies under him, but their connection was something more than sex. As if the room was a sacred place, enchanted in some way. They had left all their worries, concerns, preconceived notions about right or wrong behind. They were naked in every way, and free to be.
Buffy was trembling, her orgasm taking her like an out of body experience. Wave after wave of ecstasy crashed over her as she cried out their names. She fell forward onto Angel’s chest, panting and still being thrust into by them both.
Tears fell from Angel’s eyes as he felt Buffy cum and fall forward. He was close himself, and watching his lover climax pushed him over the edge too.
Spike followed Buffy after seeing the feelings written on Angel’s face. The emotions, combined with the physical sensations, were too much for him to hold back any longer. He felt Buffy spasming around him, and Angel’s cock pulsing through the thin membrane separating them inside Buffy. He was making love to both of them at once. I was more beautiful then he could have imagined. He came, collapsing on Buffy’s back, and felt Angel’s hands on his back.
They lay together, joined for hours as they slept, none wanting to lose that intimate contact.
The three of them took a week off work, explaining to their friends that they had some personal issues to work out.
During the following days, they talked about all the things they had kept from each other over the years, hidden emotions and feelings brought out into the open.
Angel told Spike of his control issues, his constant fear of Angelus, his guilt for past deeds, and his fear of letting down or not being able to protect his friends and loved ones. He told him of his love for him, his love for Buffy, and being torn between the two. He apologized for the harsh treatment he’d given Spike while he was Angelus, and thanked him for never losing faith in him.
He told Buffy that he was ashamed and guilty for his past, consumed by the fear that she would never, ever be able to truly forgive him. And if she couldn’t forgive, how could she be open to love him? He shared his fear of her not being able to accept his love for Spike. He loved her, he had from the moment he first saw her. He’d known she was too young, and he’d fought to stay away. He had felt shame, but he wanted her to know he loved her, and he would spend the rest of his days proving it to her, if she’d have him.
Buffy told Angel of her self-hate for loving him after all the pain he’d caused. She shared her shame for falling in love with Spike, while still in love with him. She spoke of her fear of letting people down—all of them, not just those closest to her, but everyone. She was scared she hadn’t done what she was put on earth to do. She feared her love for the men in her life had clouded her judgment.
She told Spike of her embarrassment of the way she had treated him. Told him of the pull towards him she’d felt for years, how she’d lied to him. How she’d lied to herself. She confessed her love, and thanked him for the times he’d stood by her, even when she hadn’t deserved it.
Spike had the most to tell. He told Angel of his pain before he was turned, and how it had affected him in his afterlife. He was different from other vampires; he didn’t understand why he still felt a conscience after he’d been turned. He’d been angry in his life, and angry after death. He couldn’t fit in, or be accepted. He told of the many times he’d felt tenderness from Angel, and had secretly clung to the hope that someday Angel wouldn’t hide it from the world.
He spoke of his jealousy of Angel’s relationship with Buffy, and his love for her never being returned because of Buffy being so scarred by the events that surrounded their affair.
His fear that he would forever love, and never be loved.
His fear of being immortal, and alone.
His fear of never feeling like he was a part of something bigger.
His fear of putting himself out there for the two he loved the most, and being laughed at.
Many tears accompanied their confessions, but in the end, they accomplished something far greater than Spike ever could have imagined. They found peace and love and happiness.
Spike sat at the desk in the parlor, listening to Angel and Buffy laughing in the kitchen, and smiled. Gracefully he pulled out his well-worn journal, opened it to the first blank page and began to write. He hadn’t been moved to write a poem for many years, but the sounds of his everyday life inspired him. His lovers were preparing a meal together, and soon all three of them would sit down and discuss their days, their future. Always together.
He knew it would never be something scholars looked upon as a great literary piece, but he wrote it from his heart.
Sometimes life just isn’t fair;
People are cruel and just don’t care.
You feel as though the stress won’t end;
And if it does, it starts all over again.
You search to find your paradise;
Only you find, it isn’t that nice.
You’ve compromised your future goals;
As life rakes you over its red-hot coals.
You feel your self-esteem slowly descending;
But you know what is always impending.
A speck of light, a silver lining;
A new day dawning, the sun is shining.
Your mind is open, your thoughts, carefree.
You wonder why you couldn’t see.
Happiness was at your fingertips,
The answers, all at your ready lips.
Take a chance, follow your heart!
Go ahead, a brand new start!
Just jump right in, in a single bound,
And you’ll realize its all around.
Happiness and love were always there,
Even when you thought that no one cared.
But you’ve always had it, and always will,
Even when life is just run of the mill.
Spike put his pen back and closed his journal. He tucked it away in the drawer, promising to visit it again as soon as the mood struck.
He rose and joined Buffy and Angel. They were happy, and that was all he’d ever wanted.