Chapter 2 - Need You



Dawn sat happily next to Spike, staring at him as he drank from his mug of warm pigs’ blood. She rested her head on her hand, sighing when he got up to leave. He looked at her, eyebrow cocked up. “What’s up lil’ bit?” he asked. Dawn blushed, looking away. Spike glanced at Buffy who shrugged her shoulders before returning her attention to the pile of bills set in front of her.
“I have to go, school and all,” Dawn said, looking at Buffy while grabbing her backpack which sat adjacent to her on a chair. Buffy glanced up from her work, looking at Dawn with a puzzled expression.
“Dawn, its July. You don’t have school.” Dawn felt her cheeks turn red and she glared at her sister.
“Well, I forgot. I have to go anyway. I promised Xander I’d help out at the shop.” Spike smiled.
“Giles has another Magic Box?” he asked, smirking happily. Dawn nodded her head vigorously.
“Giles is in England. Something about starting a new Watchers Council. He got a shop here for Xander since he missed Anya and it reminded him of the Magic Box back home.” Buffy paused, silent for a moment. “Back in Sunnydale California,” she corrected. “Anyways, Dawn’s been helping out over the summer to earn money for a car.” Spike nodded, smiling slightly at Dawn. Buffy smiled lightly too, returning to the bills.
“Well, I can drive you to the shop. I’d like to see it myself,” Spike offered, smiling at Dawn.
“Yes! That would be awesome! Come on! There’s so much I have to tell you!” Dawn said in excitement, grabbing Spike’s hand and pulling him towards the door.
“Hey you two! Get back in here and clean up your breakfast.” But they had already left, Spike throwing a blanket over his head.


“Hello and welcome to the guy with a burning blanket over his head,” Xander looked at Dawn who stood by the door, looking flushed. The next thing Xander saw was a flash of platinum blonde hair and a Doc Marten stomping on the blanket. “No. Way. You’re back. How? Why? How?” Xander asked looking at Spike to Dawn and back to Spike. As Spike opened his mouth to answer, Buffy walked into the Magic Box. She began to walk pass them but Spike grabbed her by the waist and pulled her against him, smirking as he did so.
“How, don’t really know. Why, because I left a beautiful slayer and needed to get back to her. And how, don’t know,” Spike said, keeping a tight grasp on the slayer who was trying to get away.
“Spike let go,” she giggled, playfully hitting him on the chest. Dawn rolled her eyes before sitting on a stool by the counter.
“You could just use your slayer force to make him go. I don’t understand why you’re acting like that.” Xander nodded, taking a seat next to Dawn.
“I do agree. Hey, did Willow do another spell? Am I going to have demons running after me again?” Dawn giggled smiling happily at Xander. Now that Anya was dead, of course a sad thing, he was free and Dawn still had that crush on him.
“I remember that. Remember Buffy? You were looking at that wedding dress in the window and Riley bumped into you. And you told him that you getting married to Spike. And then the next day you told him you made Spike up because you didn’t want to freak him out.” Buffy felt Spike’s grip tighten on her and heard him growl low at the mention of Riley.
“Yes I remember Dawn. And no Xander, Willow hasn’t done a spell. Remember, she’s busy with Kennedy in England. I don’t think anything happened.” Xander smiled and returned to the cash register. He paused, looking at it sadly before opening it to put money in it.
“Hey, where’s that chit of yours? Anya? She isn’t back into the whole vengeance thing is she?” Spike asked, looking around the empty shop. Xander felt a lump grow in his throat and he tried to swallow it down. Tears began to brim in his eyes.
“I have to check on something in the back,” he lied, walking away from the group. Spike noticed how everyone went silent at Anya’s name and it only confused him more. He turned Buffy around but she held her head down, thinking of the excited blonde who used to talk over Xander’s penis openly.
“What was that about?”
“Anya died. She was saving Andrew when one of those bringers killed her,” she whispered, looking up at him, tears streaming down her cheeks at the memory. “I don’t know why I’m crying.” Spike pulled her close to him, smoothing her hair.
“It’s ok luv. I’m sure she’s happy where she is.” Buffy nodded, nuzzling her face in the crook of his neck.
“Well, I’m going to go help Xander,” Dawn stated quietly. Buffy pulled back from Spike, smiling sadly at him before walking into the back after Dawn.


The Used blared in Dawn’s room as she readied her self for her first real date with a normal guy. She applied the dark lipstick, not noticing the vampire standing in her doorframe watching her intently. He crossed the room, walking to the boom box. He watched her as she continued to put on her make up. “You touch the stop button and you’ll have a stake in your heart before you can say that word Mary Poppins says,” Dawn stated calmly, turning around and glaring at him, hands on her hips. He smirked, sauntering over to her bed and sitting on it.
“Since when do you listen to The Used?” he asked, looking at her up and down. Lil’ Bit wasn’t so little any more. She had grown into a beautiful young woman like her mother, her sister. He felt tears spring to his blue eyes as he looked up at her smiling.
“I’ve listened to them for a long time. You’re the one that got me into them remember?” He nodded, patting the spot next to him. She sat down, looking forward. He placed a lock of her brown hair behind her hair.
“Yea, I remember lil’ bit. I think I should call you something else though. You’ve grown so much. I’ve missed a lot haven’t I?” he asked, looking at her with wonder and awe. Dawn nodded smiling.
“Yea, but it’s great you’re back and I don’t think you should call me something else. I’ll always be the lil’ bit, or niblit,” she said calmly. Spike nodded, pulling her into a hug.
“Yea niblit but it was like yesterday when I was trying to kill you all. My little girl has all grown up,” he said smiling. Dawn smiled back up at him nodding. “Going out on dates with boys that I haven’t approved of yet.” Dawn rolled her eyes, standing up only to be pulled back down. “You listen to me. If this guy hurts you in any way, if his makes a move and you don’t want it, you call me right away. Just scream out me name and I’ll be there. You know, vampire hearing and all.” Dawn smiled, nodding.
“You don’t have to worry. I’m going out with this guy named Connor and it’s going to be a double date. So my friend Jess and Andrew will be there.” Spike nodded as she stood up but he pulled her back down. His eyebrows were creased with confusion. “Connor? Angel’s Connor?” Dawn looked up at him and raised her eyebrow to match his raised one.
“Connor Holtz. Not Connor…. um, Angel? What is Angels’ last name?” Spike shrugged. The door bell rang, causing Dawn to squeal in excitement. “They’re here! Come on Spike, you have to meet him. He’s really nice and sweet.”
“Dawn! Connor, Jess, and Andrew are here,” Buffy called up. Spike nodded, fallowing Dawn down stairs to meet up with three teens. Andrew’s eyes widened.
“Spike! You’re here? When did you get here? Last time I saw you, you had your hands cut off and that slayer had knocked me out!” Buffy looked at Andrew to Spike back to Andrew,
“You knew he was back?” she asked, glaring at Andrew. Andrew nodded, cowering behind the other boy. Spike smiled, looking at the supposed Connor up and down.
“I’ll tell you later Buffy.” He paused, looking at Connor while smirking. “You, I need to talk to you.” Connor nodded, fallowing him into the kitchen, leaving Andrew to fend for himself.


Spike looked Connor up and down again, smirking at the resemblance of both Darla and Peaches in the boy. “Ok, what’s your name, who are your parents, and why are you going out with the lil’ bit?” Spike asked, pulling out a mug of blood before putting it in the microwave.
“My name is Connor Holtz. I only live with my dad Daniel Holtz. My mom left us when I was ten, and for the finale on, I really like her.” Spike nodded.
“Ok, just know this. I don’t care how old you are. You hurt her and you’ll find yourself without a heart, got it?” Connor nodded. He looked at the blonde vampire with a serious face.
“Yes sir. I promise I won’t let anything happen to her.” Spike nodded.
“Ok kid. You pass the test. Go frolic with lil’ bit and friends,” Spike said, waving him off while he got out his mug. He sprinkled in some wheat-a-bix along with the pigs’ blood and took a sip. Happy with it, he walked out into the living room and said good bye to the group of teenagers, Andrew giving him a big hug before he left. “Good kid. Looks a lot like Peaches and Darla don’t you think?” he said to Buffy while sitting on the couch to finish his blood.
“What do you mean he looks a lot like Angel and Darla?” Buffy asked, sitting next to him.
“That’s the pounces kid. He knocked Darla up and she had the kid. Some prophecy. Anyway, last year, the powers that be put a spell on everyone. So now the kid thinks this Daniel Holtz is his dad and doesn’t know that his real father is the vampire running Wolfram and Heart. Angel knows of course and he told me. Don’t know why since we don’t get a long. I guess he could trust me. Being that we’ve known each other since the 1700s.” Buffy sat silent, looking straight forward.
“Angel had sex with Darla?” she asked, her voice cracking with emotion. At this, Spike, slammed his empty mug on the coffee table, and stood up.
“Jesus Buffy. Yes, the pounce fucked Darla. No, he didn’t turn evil because it wasn’t one true moment of happiness like it was for you two. They had a kid. The kid was kidnapped by Daniel Holtz who had been hunting Dru, Peaches, Darla, and I in the 1700s cos we killed his family and turned his kid into a vampire. Holtz was hired by Wolfram and Heart to bring down Angel. So Holtz jumped into some portal and taught the kid to hate Angel. Both came back. The kid tried to kill Angel after Holtz killed himself and made it look like Angel did it. Later on, something happened and the powers that be did some mo-jo. The kid, Connor, was sent to live with a family away from Angel and he forgot all about his mum and da. The only one who knows about Connor is Angel, me and now you. You knew. You knew that he had a kid and you went through the same bloody thing and you came to me. But you don’t remember.”
“Dawn is going out with Angel’s son?” Buffy asked, looking up at Spike, tears shining in her eyes. Spike sighed, realizing that she would never be over him.
“Yes, Dawn is going out with Connor. You kid sis is going out with your ex-lovers son. They don’t know it. Connor doesn’t know it. He thinks Daniel is his da. If we told him that his father lived in LA and was a vamp, it would destroy him. I’m asking you a big thing Buffy. You can’t tell Angel you know. You can’t tell Dawn, you can’t tell Connor. You can’t tell anyone.” He bent down by her side, taking her hand in his, squeezing it gently. “Can you do that Buffy? For me? For Connor? For Angel?” Buffy looked down at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. She nodded. “You still love him don’t you?” She nodded, turning her gaze to something else. “Buffy? Do you love me?” She was silent, her hands shaking in his grasp. “Look at me Buffy and tell me. I need to know. Do you love me?” She sighed, standing up and looking down on him. He bowed his head, already knowing her answer. In that one action she had told him. “I’m beneath you,” he whispered. He looked up at her, on his knees. “I’m beneath you. See. Always beneath you. Beneath them. The bastard. The killer. The soulless on. The chipped. The traitor. The untrustable. Everything you hate. Everything you never wanted. Everything you never needed. Tell me, is this worth it? Coming back? Fighting for good? Trying to help? Should I have stayed burned and gone? Because I really don’t know anymore and the only thing that’s worth staying around for is you. So tell me, is it worth it? Am I worth it?”
“I can’t do this right now. I need to think,” she whispered, ready to walk away. But he grabbed her.
“I need to know. I need to know if I’m wanted. If I’m needed. Give me a reason to stay, please. Give me a reason,” he cried, pleading with her as tears fell down his face. Buffy bent down, brushing his tears away with her thumb.
“Spike, you are not beneath me. You are not any of those things. You’re with me. Equal. I need you here with me. I need you here to help me and Dawn. You have a soul,” she said smiling, placing her hand over his unbeating heart. “A heart, one that’s not in working order at the moment,” she added, causing him to chuckle which made her smile even more. “But its there. I don’t know if I love you,” his smile faded and his head drooped down. “Yet. I just need some time. To get everything sorted out. But first, I have one more question.”
“Ask me pet.”
“How come Andrew knew that you were alive before me and what’s with the no hand thing?”
“Do I have to?” Buffy nodded, pulling him back up on the couch.





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