Chapter Sixteen

In all the years that Rupert Giles had been a Watcher, in all the years he had sat in the front row of paranormal, he had never expected to have two vampires taking up residence in his home. His experience had always been that they were vicious, murdering vermin that had to be killed, or in turn be killed. He had experienced much however, so on his first encounter with Angel he felt wary but accepting. Especially when faced with the offer of help in protecting his young charge.

Knowing and accepting the inevitable early death of a Slayer, he had still been devastated on uncovering the prophecy warning of the Slayer’s loss in a battle with the Master. But in all his years, he had never been prepared for a Slayer like Buffy Summers. In his continual astonishment at her attitude towards slaying, and the inclusion of her friends in the mission, he had found himself in the centre of a band of merry mini slayers that had all gone beyond the call of friendship to protect the world. Their motivation was of course survival, but also the value they placed on the life of Buffy. They wanted to protect her, and he knew they would never give up on her.

But when it came to her relationship with Angel, they had been split. Of course, they had remained beside her, but post-Acathla certain members of the group would never be accepting of the words ‘soul’ and ‘vampire’ in the one entity. Oddly enough, he was finding that he might not be one of that side. The more he was seeing of Spike’s remarkable transformation, the more he accepted this incredible joining of spirit between his Slayer and the former Master. In fact, he was hard pressed through the night to not stick out his tongue at Angel and go ‘nerny nerny ner ner!” Of course he stopped himself, not having the emotional wherewithal to put up with any more scowling tonight.

When they had found Spike on the floor of the study, scrubbing frantically at non-existent blood stains, his Watcher hat had been firmly in place. He couldn’t deny that he had been studying the vampire all night, noticing his flinches and starts when certain events of his future were brought up. He also noticed the familiarity between Buffy and the vampire, a familiarity that should have been impossible based on the combative relationship the two had shared up till now. He could only explain it by what Tara had claimed, was it only yesterday? They did indeed appear to belong together.

The Watcher in him could not ignore the mystical evidence they had so far witnessed, the non-igniting flame when their hands touched, the crimson mist that had surrounded them when they kissed, even the spell that seemed to bring them back more united than before they had begun. He could see Buffy’s emotions change and her acceptance grow before his eyes, and with a certainty that the man in Giles wanted to deny, he knew that Tara was right. The love he saw blossom in front of his eyes held maturity and a sense of right that was lacking from the melodrama that was Angel and Buffy.

He could sense the depth, and to top it all off, the deed itself of fighting for his soul, was enough for Giles to decide to be supportive. A demon seeking a conscience to protect his mortal enemy… why it was almost amusing if it wasn’t so romantic, and Giles wasn’t so long in the tooth that he couldn’t appreciate romance. Xander would stand alone in his ‘vampire equals bad’ club.

Giles would give the blonde a chance, just as he’d given Angel. His easy sanctifiction may have had a little to do with the fact that needn’t be on guard about Spike losing his soul; for whatever reason. Buffy deserved this; she had earned it with her tireless devotion to her calling.

So, it might have started out as Watcher enthusiasm for study, but once Buffy had placed her arms around the vampire’s shaking form and murmuring madness, it was his father’s role that he felt teared up at seeing the pain of his daughter’s love. Spike had had a rough time of it the previous night, his acclimatisation to the soul in itself was difficult and he knew even frightening to the vampire but he had been served a double whammy with this chip inhibiting his natural tendencies. Though it was an added safeguard that could enable Xander to be more accepting at least, he knew that if Spike were to be a proper member of their little entourage, and be useful in the fight, he would need the chip removed.

Some of the events that Buffy had relayed about their future made his skin crawl, and he wondered how things could have gotten so out of control. The Ripper in him wanted to blame the chipped vampire, for with his arrival he brought bad luck and the destruction of their unity, but he knew it wasn’t fair and that he attributed too much to Spike. Still, he shuddered at the trials ahead, and knew that they would need an unimpaired Spike behind them.

His mind had been reeling from all the information Buffy had recounted. They had learned a lot from the spell, probably a lot that the three participants had even kept to themselves. He knew though that it was wrong to delve into the future, though, and he feared the possible consequence. One thing stuck though, and he vowed first thing to set in motion instruction for Willow. One thing they did not need was for her to lose control and turn to darkness. He could never forgive himself if he allowed that to happen. No, they would do whatever it took to prevent some of those awful events from coming to fruition. That had to be the meaning behind the journey. Behind the pain.


It was evident by Spike’s hidden fall into insanity that the Vampire was experiencing as much anguish with the return of his soul than he had previously. He couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps their sojourn into the future perhaps mucked up the vampire’s reward. Then again, contrary to Cordelia’s warning from the PTB, up to this point they could have handled the Spike situation swimmingly. So, it appeared that it was expected that they would seek answers, and indeed it would have been imprudent for them to not try and understand the nature of his soul. Thus, Angel had come in handy at trying to soothe the lost vampire, even though they both could see Buffy’s anger that he could offer something she couldn’t; acceptance and care from a Sire.

‘Angel will be important for Spike’s adjustment, as well as instruction for Buffy,’ he had thought, when they had both heard the screams come from the sleeping pair. They had rushed to the room to find Spike lucid and soothing the sobbing girl, and he had his first inkling of why Angel would be elemental in the recovery of the pair. Without hearing of the Slayer’s dream, he suspected he already knew of its meaning. She had taken on some of the vampire’s pain from his crimes, and though Giles clenched his teeth angrily that she would have had to see such carnage and vileness, he knew it was necessary. When they kissed, Angel standing fuming beside him, Giles knew that it would be their love that would help them get though it. She needed to see what his demon really was, see how remarkable his act of sacrifice for her was in searching to replace his soul for her. And Giles felt furious hatred toward himself for the tosser he was to become in trying to guilt his Slayer away from this all empowering acceptance and love. With a guilty start, he realised that as much as the self-proclaimed Scoobies loved and wanted her, none of them could come close to this acceptance, this faith. Not even Angel, which was why he had never deserved her.

Aware that they were witnessing a very private and emotionally traumatic moment for the pair, Giles dragged Angel from the room and quietly shut the door.





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