“Would it make a difference?”
The words registered but her brain couldn’t seem to make sense of them.
“You’re staying? You’re not leaving on Monday?”
His grin widened and he shook his head. “Not Monday. Next year. What if I were going to be staying in L.A.? You‘d want to be my girl, yeah?”
And suddenly she saw red. She’d didn’t even think twice as she reacted almost on instinct, her hand meeting with his jaw in a firm crack that sent him rocking back on his heels.
“Ow, what’d you do that for?”
She got to her feet, fueled by fury as she loftily jabbed a finger in his direction. “You jerk. With your oh I know betters and I don’t want to risk your hearts. And now you have the nerve to come back here and claim you’re staying next year? And expect me to just fall back into your arms? Like some sort of, of . . . Isabella?”
Spike looked thoroughly confused, but she couldn’t seem to stop the tumble of words as she turned and walked down to the edge of the stream, biting her lip to keep from crying. “Do you know how much it hurt when you said you didn’t want me to care for you, Spike? How do I know this isn’t just another round of your favorite game of get Buffy’s hopes up?”
“Buffy?”
She refused to acknowledge him, even though his voice wrapped around her like a tactile thing, drawing her back to him.
“Buffy, love.” His hand reached for her shoulder and she turned around. “Didn’t mean to be presumptuous. Never meant it as a game.” His thumb was caressing her neck now, a soft slide that slowly melted away her resistance as he kept talking, about how he was sorry, just let him explain.
The words washed over her, lapping away at the edges of her anger. Spike. In L.A. Next year. With her. With her. With her. He wanted to stay. With her. Bitty Buffy and Grown up Buffy began to tango together in excitement as it finally sunk in. He wasn’t leaving. And he wanted her.
He continued, starting to sound a little desperate. “Buffy, what I’m trying to ask is, would you want to see me, in L.A.? I know things wouldn‘t be quite like here, because you‘d be in school and I’d be working, but . . .”
She knew what she needed to do. Forget words. He’d said enough for both of them.
She kissed him. For a moment she could feel his surprise against her lips, and then he met her halfway, making every kiss they’d shared before pale in comparison. She wrapped her arms around his neck, wanting to feel him, smell him, taste him, assure herself with all her senses this wasn’t some dream she would wake from. It was real.
“That was a yes, by the way, in case you needed a translation,” she murmured in his ear when she finally broke away.
“I figured as much.” He traced her features with his hands, reacquainting them as the darkness descended and the full moon began to rise in the sky. “I missed you, shortcake. Missed every part of you. Was killing me, not being with you this last week.”
“I missed you, too. I’m so glad you’re back. Tell me more?” she prompted. “Tell me everything.”
He gave her more details between kisses as their hands roamed, renewing their connection. She couldn’t stop the huge smile that seemed to have permanently overtaken her face.
“Say it again.”
“What?” He nipped her neck and she pinched him lightly.
“You know what. Before you left, what you told me.”
“I love you, Buffy Summers.”
She believed him. But she wanted more. “I love you, too.” She tightened her grip on his arms, “You’re not going to run away this time, are you?”
“Not going anywhere.” His low voice rolled across her body and she felt it in her bones, the knowledge that tonight she was going to be his, body and soul.
“Make love to me, Spike.” It wasn’t so much a question as a statement of what was going to happen, but she wanted him to know she was ready. And she didn’t want to wait any longer.
His hands were swift and sure, but the nervousness she’d felt before at uncovering herself for him was gone, replaced with the deep sense that this was right. The right man, the right time, the right place.
She watched the sky darken overhead and the stars reveal themselves as he covered her body, stroking her softly until she no longer needed her eyes open to see the brightness of the celestial bodies as she shattered around his fingers. She sought his mouth for a kiss, relishing the weight of his flesh, the slide of his skin against her, the hardness of his erection pressed against the softness of her stomach. She needed more.
She helped him with the condom that he pulled from his jeans and promised herself that she’d explore him more next time. And then she stopped thinking about next time as he slid deep inside her. The pain was brief and then the sense of completion, of being replete in a way she’d never felt before settled over her.
She would never forget this night. The hot July moon above was witness as her body tightened around him and she called out his name, and she believed him when he told her again he loved her as he spilled hot inside her body.
She’d never felt more alive. Walking back to the house on the path after an impromptu skinny dip, giggling softly as she tripped on a gnarled root that she knew was there. Loving the way he swept her up into his arms and carried her the rest of the way until they were nearly in sight of the house.
Behind the oak that stood beside Spike’s small quarters, he gently sat her on her feet and turned her face up to his. She met his lips eagerly and was lost again for several moments until he slowly ended the kiss and rested his forehead against hers.
“Aren’t you coming in?” She gestured towards the house and saw his confusion. “They’re gone for the weekend, remember? Their anniversary.”
“You sure?”
She nodded, lacing her fingers in his and pulling him towards the house. “Stay with me tonight.”
He couldn’t take his eyes off her. The sun was newly risen, its rays sending a soft glow into the bedroom and highlighting her still sleeping form as it lay curled beside him. In sleep she looked so young, the soft fall of hair framing her like some sort of fairytale princess, enchanting in her beauty.
He was content to just watch her breathe for the moment; loathe to disturb her sleep and the feeling of . . . Happiness? Joy? Contentment? There didn’t seem to be an emotion he could articulate that captured precisely what he was feeling. But he didn’t want it to end.
She gave a little snuffle and rolled closer to him, seeming to seek him even in her sleep. He held her in his arms, soaking in the warmth of her soft body, and feeling his own reaction to the nearness of her flesh as images of the night before flashed through his brain.
Erotic. Intoxicating. Mind-blowingly fabulous. He was vaguely ashamed of the utter primitive satisfaction he felt in the knowledge that he was her first, that no one else in the world knew how sweet she tasted, how tight and hot she was, the desperate little noises she made in the back of her throat when she was seconds from coming. But only vaguely.
And beyond the visceral, there was something lurking deeper that was almost more powerful than he was willing to acknowledge. He’d not felt anything even approaching it since his early days with Dru, the sensation of fearlessly free-falling when he’d locked eyes with Buffy and seen everything, everything he needed reflected back at him in full measure. Absolute trust, love, affection. Acceptance.
It was by turns utterly exhilarating and completely frightening how much his heart was entangled with hers.
She stirred again, and he knew she’d be awake in a few moments. Time to stop with the deep thoughts. They had all day together and he intended to make the most of it.
He let her hair tickle his nose as he inhaled her scent, storing away the memories of what it felt like to wake up with her in his arms. Her eyes slowly fluttered open, a hazy green that he knew had registered him as a soft smile curved her face.
She rolled over, and pinched her arm. He frowned. “What’d you do that for?”
“Make sure I’m not dreaming.”
He pulled her closer and rained a series of kisses on her face. “Not a dream. Right here in the flesh, taking in your ravishing p.j.s.”
She covered her face. She’d forgotten that this set had happily prancing ponies on the shorts. He pried her fingers off. “I like the horsies.”
She giggled, and let him slowly pull up the top as he placed a series of wet, hot kisses across her stomach that made her catch her breath. Best sleepover ever. He was now kissing each of the cartoons in turn, and the flesh beneath quivered at the proximity of his hot mouth.
When he’d effectively dissolved her into a pile of goo, he propped himself up on one elbow. “So, do you have plans today?”
She regarded him expectantly. “Well, I was planning to spend it with Raoul.” She laughed out loud at the scowl that marred his brow and had to kiss it better. “That is, I was going to finish The Baron’s Daughter. The romance novel I was reading last night. But I’m very open to suggestions.” She fluttered her eyes at him.
“Oh you are? Care to spend the day with me instead?”
She asked, wide-eyed, “I don‘t know, will there be ravishing involved?”
He growled and tackled her to demonstrate how very much ravishing was a part of the day’s agenda when the sound of the phone ringing shattered the moment. Buffy groaned and sat up reluctantly. “That’s probably Gram. She was all flustered about me staying by myself.”
“Mmm, Guess it’s a good thing I showed up to take care of you then.”
She giggled as he nuzzled her neck. “Yeah, I’m sure she’d be delighted.” The ringing continued and Buffy heaved a sigh. “Let me go answer that.”
He followed her as she padded down the steps, oddly reluctant to let her out of his sight, even for a moment.
Buffy picked up the phone. “Summers’ residence. Oh . . . yes, he is. Just a minute.”
She turned an evil eye towards him. “It’s some woman for you. She says her name is Lilah.”
Her inflection made it sound more like Satan was dialing direct, but he took the proffered phone anyway and pulled her into his lap, clearly trying to distract her. She succumbed anyway.
“Hello, Lilah?”
She watched him sternly as he hmmmed and yeahed his way through the conversation she couldn’t quite hear. Or at least she tried, annoyed that he was still chatting away with this Lilah chick who’d interrupted their quality cuddle time, but her little squeaks as his free hand roamed up under the thin white cotton tank top undermined her attempts at disapproval.
“Tell you what, Lilah. I need to check with my girlfriend, see if she can come with me. Can I ring you back in a few?”
Her face brightened considerably as he clicked the receiver off and sat it down on the table. “Who’s Lilah? And what do you need to ask your girlfriend?”
“Lilah’s a realtor in L.A. Handles stuff for Aetherton. My Grand gave her a call, wanted her to show me some places. Figured if I’m going to be staying next year, I’ll be needing to find a place to live. I shared a place last year off campus with some blokes, good guys, but a noisy bunch. So I was thinking maybe I could get your opinion.”
“Really?” She couldn’t stop the big smile that burst out. He wanted her to go help him pick out a place? It was so . . . domestic. And kind of wiggy serious. Not the kind of thing you did with someone you didn’t plan on having around long-term. She felt her heart beat just a little faster. “That’d be great.”
“You sure? Wanted today to be special, and not sure if checking out apartments tops the list of most romantic dates.”
“Nope. It’ll be good. And you can do something romantic for me tonight, ‘kay?”
He gave her a quick kiss. “Rain check on romance, got it. Guess we’d best get ready if we’re going. I’ll call Lilah back, tell her we’re coming.”
She wiped the film off the mirror so she could see as she vigorously brushed her teeth, then swished with mouthwash. She was surprised how much she looked the same. Somehow she’d thought she’d looked older. Different.
But she felt it, inside. Not just the obvious, the sudden way it would hit her when she closed her eyes, the wave of sensation like a full on-body flashback of how it felt to have him buried deep inside her, so much a part of her she couldn’t tell where he ended and she began. But like they’d reached a new plateau. They were real now. Not two ships passing in the night. Not a few weeks fling.
She was his girlfriend.
She rinsed and wiped her mouth, focusing on the girl in the mirror.
“Hi, I’m Spike’s girlfriend.” Hmm, would her mom think she’d picked up one of the road hogs from out at that dive on the interstate? “Hi, this is my boyfriend, William. I’m his girlfriend, Buffy.”
Way to go with the redundancy, Buff. She frowned at herself.
“I’m his girlfriend.”
She smiled. Saying it out loud just made it feel so much more real.
She wrapped the towel around her and ventured back to her bedroom. Now, what to wear. The grin slid off her face as she surveyed her clothes. She hadn’t packed for apartment hunting, just casual stuff. Everything screamed juniors.
She rummaged around, finding settling on a pair of jean capris and a plain white t-shirt.
“Hey gorgeous?” She whirled around to find him lounging in her doorway. “You ready?”
“Just a sec. Spike, will this look alright?”
He nodded. “You look good no matter what you wear. Or don’t.” He waggled his eyebrows.
“Pig.” She wrinkled her nose and tried to stop the hot flush that she could feel rising up her neck. “Let me just get some makeup on, alright?” She rushed through the ritual of paint to perfection before rushing to join him in the car.
Lilah reminded her of some of the snotty types that frequented the gallery where her mother worked, always looking like they thought they were just a bit above you. She made a beeline for Spike as soon as they entered the sleekly decorated office and air-kissed him.
“William. So good to see you again. When your grandfather called, I told him I wouldn’t dream of letting anyone else help.”
“Well, I hope I’m not ruining your Saturday, Lilah.”
She trilled a laugh that made Buffy want to grind her teeth. “Oh now, don’t be ridiculous, handsome. When an Aetherton man calls, I don’t even think twice.”
Buffy stood by Spike’s side, wondering when she was going to be introduced. Lilah had barely flicked a glance in her direction, she’d been so busy fawning over Spike since they’d walked in. She looked down at her own capris, sale rack in the mall, and cheap t-shirt, then glanced back at Lilah’s tailored perfection, accessorized just so. Maybe Spike was having second thoughts.
He turned to her then. “Lilah, I’d like to introduce you to my girlfriend, Buffy.”
Lilah’s eyebrow shot up infinitesimally, but she was too much of a consummate professional to offend a client out right. Buffy doubted Spike even caught it. “Your girlfriend? Why you sly dog, your grandfather never mentioned.” She proffered her hand and Buffy shook it.
“So Buffy, did you and William meet at UCLA?”
Buffy felt her mouth go dry. “Umm, well . . .”
Spike cut in smoothly. “No, we met this summer. Shall we get going? We only have this afternoon.”
“Of course, we’ll take my car.”
Buffy sat in the backseat of Lilah’s Escalade, watching the streets flash by as they were driven to posh neighborhoods miles from the more suburban streets where she and her mother lived. They toured house after house, with beautiful manicured lush lawns and sparkling backyard pools. Huge. She felt very out of place.
“This is the last one.”
Lilah pulled into the driveway and ushered them to the covered doorway flanked with columns. “It’s a real gem, and as you’ll see from the back, even has an ocean view.”
She showed them through the bedrooms, ran through the assets of the well-equipped kitchen, and pointed out the virtues of the stunning poolside that overlooked a view of blue for miles. It was breathtaking.
“Lilah, would you give us a minute?”
“Of course.” She stepped away discreetly.
Spike pulled her into his arms and turned her to face the ocean. “What’d you think, pet? Nice, huh? Think you’d want to visit me here?”
“It’s beautiful, Spike, but . . .”
“What, sweetheart?”
She tilted her face up to look at him as she whispered, “Can you really afford this?”
He laughed. “Seems a bit much, huh? I hadn’t really thought I’d go for a place like this, was just going to look for an apartment, but Grand seemed to have other ideas.” He surveyed the breathtaking view as he tightened his arms around her. “Be a nice place to come home to, especially if you were here.”
“Yeah.” She couldn’t deny that the house was lovely, but with every place they’d toured, her grandmother’s long-ago comment kept sounding in her head. He wasn’t from their world. She got that now, in a way she really hadn’t before. “It’s absolutely gorgeous, Spike.”
“I’m going to think on it.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead. “Thank you for coming with me, love.”
He kept her hand securely in his until they got back to the SUV, but the tightness in her chest didn’t quite ease even as they bid Lilah goodbye and he held the door for her to the DeSoto.