[Reviews - 87]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Microsoft Word Chapter or Story | ePub eBook Chapter or Story | Printer Chapter or Story

Has been viewed 1692 times

- Text Size +




Author's Chapter Notes:
Spike crosses a line.

A huge thanks to my lovely beta All4spike for getting this chapter back to me so fast. Also a big thanks to Edgehead (Mel) for the awesome banner.
Chapter 11

Seeking solace

Buffy looked at the piece of paper in her hand. Dawn had given it to her that morning saying Spike had asked her to pass it on. Looking up at the apartment building she wondered why he had wanted her to meet him here.

Moving inside she headed upstairs. She stopped at door four and stuffing the paper back in her pocket, she knocked. Spike swung the door open, greeting her with a smile before letting her in. She was surprised when she walked inside to find the apartment beautifully decked out.

“Wow, nice place, whose is it?” she asked, curious.

“Mine.” He smiled.

She turned to look at him, surprised. “Since when?”

“Just after Faith’s return. I had a minion of Dru’s show up asking if I could meet with her.”

“Dru, your ex?” she asked, stunned.

“Yeah, so I figured I should see what she wanted. Turns out she wanted to settle our finances. We had a joint account together. I thought for sure she would keep it all for herself but she split it with me,” he explained moving into the kitchen and stirring what looked like a saucepan of milk.

“Wow”

“Yeah. Surprised the hell out of me, so after that I decided I should buy my own place and here it is,” he replied, pouring two mugs of hot cocoa before dropping a little marshmallow in both and passing one to her.

“Thanks” she smiled taking a sip before placing her cup down.

“Buffy I wanted to say I’m sorry,” he said, moving around the counter to stand in front of her.

“For what?”

“I know I haven’t been around much lately.”

“It’s fine Spike, I understand,” she replied.

“I know you do, but that doesn’t make it okay luv. Faith is having a hard time and with her not willing to talk to her friends just yet, I feel as if I should be there for her to help her out,” he tried his best to explain.

“You care about her,” she whispered. A statement more than a question.

“I worry about her. There’s a difference. But mostly I worry about Dawn, it’s almost like Faith has forgotten she even exists,” he said his brow creased with concern.

“Spike she was ripped out of heaven. You have no idea how scary and confusing that is, you just need to give her some time and you can’t do everything for her. I know you think you’re helping her, but in the end you will be crippling her.”

Spike looked up, surprised. “What do you mean?”

“Faith needs to learn to stand on her own two feet again and she never will if you are always doing everything for her. I’m not saying don’t help out, I’m just saying let her do a few things for herself.”

Spike nodded, knowing she was right, Faith was a strong, capable, amazing slayer. She just needed to remember that.

Two days later

Spike walked across the cemetery like a man with a purpose, a bag of DVD’s in one hand Chinese food in the other. He headed towards Buffy’s house where he had arranged to meet her for another movie night.

Two nights before, after their talk about Faith, they had spent the rest of the night talking and laughing, enjoying their time together, and he honestly couldn’t wait to be near her again. Picking up the pace he had almost reached the cemetery gate when Faith stepped around the corner of a mausoleum.

“Spike did you come to give me a hand?” she asked, looking at the shopping bags in his hands, slightly confused.

“Ah. Actually no, I was just headed to Buffy’s place,” he informed her, moving past her only to stop at her next words.

“Well, didn’t take you long did it?” she spat.

Turning to face her again, he placed the shopping bags down in preparation for the fight he knew was coming. “And what the bloody hell is that suppose to mean?”

“It wasn’t too long ago you were begging me for a chance, telling me how much you loved me,” she hissed at him. “Now Slutty the vampire layer shows up and it turns out I’m old news.”

“Bite your tongue about her. You may not like the attention I’m showing her but she’s been nothing but nice to you. And just so we are clear, I never, not once, said I was in love with you,” he hissed, moving to stand right in front of her.

“Oh right you never wanted me?”

“I didn’t say that. Of course I wanted you. I cared about you, worried about you. I still do luv, just not like that,” he tried his best to explain to her, not wanting to hurt her.

“And how would that be?” she asked, placing her hands on her hips.

“How you want it to be.” He saw her face become red with rage knowing he had hit the mark with his comment. There was a time he would have done anything to know Faith wanted him, but that time had been and gone.

“I want nothing from you, do you hear me NOTHING!,” she all but yelled with rage. How dare he talk to her like this? How dare he turn her down? She felt everything boil to the surface, everything her friends had done, everything she had lost. The betrayal, the fear, the hurt, the pain, and most of all, the undeniable rage all spewed out at the same moment. Punching Spike hard she watched him smash through the door of the mausoleum. She didn’t allow herself to think as she ran in, straddling his waist and continuing her assault.

“You don’t have a soul; you could never understand what I’m feeling. There is nothing good or clean in you, you are dead inside! You can’t feel anything real!” she yelled as she brought her fist down onto his face several times.

Spike could feel her punches starting to weaken as she finally stopped, her yells turning into sobs. He hugged her close to his chest, hoping it would offer her some kind of comfort.

“It’s okay luv, everything is going to be okay,” he whispered into her hair as she sobbed into his chest, but when he looked up at her face stained with tears and her eyes red and puffy, he felt his heart break for her. When she moved forward placing her soft lips on his, he pulled back.

“Faith....” he started, but she quickly stopped him, her voice pleading.

“Please Spike. I need this, if only for tonight,” she begged. Her eyes were too vulnerable. He knew he should Put an end to this before it went to far but he felt something inside him break and when she leaned in to kiss him and started unbuttoning his shirt, he did nothing to stop her.

Spike woke to the sound of birds chirping. He knew it was morning long before he opened his eyes, then he felt the events of the night before crash into him like a tidal wave. What had he done? Sitting up he kept his duster from slipping off his naked form. He could see Faith standing, now dressed, near the mausoleum entrance.

“Faith,” he said softly.

“It can never happen again,” she whispered, not bothering to turn and face him.

“I know,” he replied, standing to quickly dress. “It never should have happened at all,” he said before he could stop himself. He saw her back tense for a moment before she turned to face him.

“I’m glad it did,” she said, walking to him and placing a kiss on his cheek before stepping back. “You were there for me when I truly needed you. I’ll never forget that but.... no one has to know,” she whispered, looking down unsure. He knew she meant Buffy more than her friends.

Lifting her chin, he forced her to look at him. “Thank you,” he smiled.

“Do you want me to stay?”

“No I’ll be fine. My place isn’t far from here and I have my coat,” he replied, pointing at his duster that now lay on the floor.

She nodded before moving to the entrance again. “Goodbye Spike,” she whispered before heading out, leaving him alone.

Grabbing his duster, he headed for the entrance preparing for the mad dash home, hoping above all else that Buffy never found out, and if she did that she would be able to forgive him.


Chapter End Notes:
I know it has been so long since an update but you may have noticed i have recently update a long of my fics and i intend to keep doing that, so i hope you'll read and review.



You must login (register) to review.