Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you all so much for your supportive and lovely comments! I promise I'll get to replying to all of them! I hope you enjoy this next chapter, I'm afraid I won't be able to update for at least another week because I have lame exams :( Thank you again! p. xx.

And the biggest thank you ever to Annie who made me this awesome, awesome banner for this fic! Baby!Spike is so cute and SMG looks smoking hot! I can't seem to post it properly again... :( But you can see it here!
http://i47.tinypic.com/210azgz.jpg
“Hey, cute baby.”

Xander poked his head over the couch where little Spike lay happily clutching Buffy’s very own Mr. Gordo. He stretched out a hand to touch his blanket covered stomach when suddenly Spike let out a piercing wail and waved his arms in distress.

“Wasn’t me!” Xander jumped back, hands raised.

Buffy strode into the room, heading straight for the crying babe. “Xander Harris! What were you doing to him?” She scooped him up, running soothing strokes down his back and gently bouncing him. “No, don’t cry little Spike. It’s just silly Xander, he’s not going to hurt you.”

“Spike? As in Bleached Boy Wonder?” His eyebrows rose amazingly high on his forehead and he pointed a shaking finger at the sniffling baby. “That’s Spike? Spike’s a baby? I called Spike cute? Ngh!” He shuddered and stuck his tongue out in disgust. “Buffy, you do realise who it is you’re rock-a-bye baby-ing there? It’s Captain Peroxide! Or do you need reminding—since he’s all goo-goo ga-ga isn’t this an ideal time for, you know...“ He clutched a pretend stake in his fist and stabbed it against the air.

With a gasp, Buffy took a step away, a protective hand cupping the back of little Spike’s head. “Xander, what’s the matter with you? He’s just a baby!”

“Well, it’s not like he’s human or anything—is he? What were you going to do, feed him and bathe him and watch him grow into a big boy?”

She froze at this; an image of nursing a little baby boy, watching as he grew up, of showering him with love, flashing in her mind. However, Spike wasn’t human and as a baby vampire he wouldn’t grow. Her hold around his tiny form tightened unconsciously and she felt a part of her mourn the thought. Her attentions were turned when young Spike let out a watery whimper.

“What’s the matter little guy? Don’t cry. I’m right here, what do you need? Are you hungry?”

She brushed past Xander, hurrying to the kitchen where she made herself comfortable on a bar stool. Wrist at the ready, she touched it to his lips and had her suspicion confirmed when small fangs dropped down. His bite was so gentle; she nearly missed the sting when her skin was pierced.

“That’s how you’ve been feeding him!”

Buffy kept her gaze fixed on Spike as Xander hurtled into the kitchen. She could feel a storm of emotion brewing in her gut. There were so many, all eating away at her patience; all fuelling her determination in making sure Spike was protected.

“It’s none of your concern,” she replied quietly. “It’s easier
this way; with Slayer blood he only needs a couple of mouthfuls. It’s not hurting anyone.”

By this point Spike had already finished feeding and was licking at her puncture wounds.

“Buffy, have you gone completely out of your mind! Really look at what you’re doing! You’re acting as though you owe him something.” He began to raise his voice. “You don’t owe him a single thing; since when was it your responsibility to look after a vampire!”

“Since he started looking after me!”

She jumped from the stool, clutching young Spike to her chest and blinking back tears. When she’d felt this way in past weeks she’d turned to Spike for comfort, but she couldn’t run to him this time. He couldn’t help her, this time he needed her.

“Thing’s haven’t exactly been a breeze for me since you brought me back. Adjusting, it’s been... a challenge. But Spike, he’d help me on patrol and he asked me about my day...he brought me flowers and he—he told me that I looked pretty.”

She sniffled and looked down Spike. “He looked after me.” She spied little tears gathering in the corner of his eyes, his tiny bottom lip trembling and she hugged him closer. “Don’t cry little Spike, I’ve got you.”

When he let out a little gurgle and stuck his thumb into his mouth with wide eyes she couldn’t help but let her lips curve in a smile.

~

Dusk had begun to fall as Buffy and Willow waded their way through spell books looking for information on side-effects of the spell and reversals.

“According to this, Spike’s mind could be kind of...well, jumbled. Since he’s literally been reverted to baby form, he’s got the mind of child his age. But it’s possible that being a vampire has allowed him to recognise basic emotions, and in Spike’s particular case, I’d say people as well.”

Tenderly stroking Spike’s brow, Buffy waited patiently as the red-head scanned more pages and muttered to herself.

“His memories’ seem to have remained intact to the extent that he knows that he can trust you,” she continued. “A bit like a baby would have with his mother; that natural connection.”

A natural connection.

She liked the sound of that. And Spike was still inside that tiny body somewhere, she heaved a sigh of relief at the thought.

“Once we turn him back it might take a little time for him to fully get his memories back; a couple of days at the most. He’ll be confused; most of what he’ll remember will be emotions since he hasn’t been able to understand us.”

“Well that’s fine,” Buffy replied softly. “We’ll just keep looking after him until he’s back to normal.”

She couldn’t seem to take her eyes off him. The room was quiet for the following moments; there was just the sound of paper and baby Spike’s restful murmurs. It had the feel of a sanctuary, the content she experienced just watching and holding him in her arms. Even without words, Spike could bring her peace and comfort.

“Oh...” And with that one syllable her sanctuary was stole as Willow read aloud from the text, “The extent of return to pre-spell character and memory is founded on the individual. State of mind and age are of integral significance influencing the return of complete memory.”

“What—what is it saying? He might not remember? He might be different?”

“I guess it’s saying there’s a chance.” Shutting the book, Willow turned to her with a hopeful expression. “But the variables! Spike’s more than a century old! A-and sure, he might be a little crazy sometimes, but he’s smart and emotionally grounded and...stuff. And this connection that he has with you, it’s sure to be helpful too! I can have everything for the spell ready by tomorrow afternoon.”

Buffy didn’t know what to think, it was all happening so fast. Like this, as a baby, Spike remembered her and he trusted her. How could she risk it all be lost with another spell? But what were her choices? Tomorrow afternoon? She could lose him and them by tomorrow afternoon? She wanted to hold on to him, what did it all mean? It was too soon, all too fast.

“He’s freezing,” she blurted out. “I—I have to...there’s got to be a way I can warm him up.”

She looked around in a panic, searching the room for more blankets, more...anything. Her hold on him tightened and her words from the previous night rang in her ears.

“We’ll put everything back to the way it should be; I’ll make sure of it. I’ll look after you.”

“Buffy?” Dawn called out. “Bathroom’s yours!”

~

She’d never realised how small their bathroom sink was, which was why she was currently in her bikini and submerged in a tub of heavenly warm water with baby Spike cradled in her arms.

“This is much better, isn’t it, little guy?”
He smiled up at her, gurgling, then went back splashing one hand in the water and watching in fascination. Buffy reached over for a washcloth and bottle of bubble bath.

“Baths are no fun without bubbles,” she stated matter-of-factly. “Just a few bubbles won’t do any harm, don’t want to lose you in them, do we? After this, you’re going to be the warmest and cleanest baby vamp in the whole of Sunnydale.”

He let out a happy cry and wriggled his toes. She went about gently stroking his little body with the soapy cloth.
“You know, one day you’re gonna grow up to be the handsomest bleached blonde vampire; believe you me.”

He stuck one of his little hands in front of her and touched her nose, giggling when he brushed her lips with his fingertips. She giggled along with him.

“Aren’t you just the cutest little baby in the whole world? Yes! Yes, you are!” She lifted his little torso to her face and nuzzled against the soft skin, blowing a gentle raspberry at his bellybutton. She made a face when she realised exactly what she’d done and who she’d done it to. “You totally owe me for this, you know?”

“But I hope you remember this.” She settled into the tub, using her free hand to scoop bubbles and warm water over his little limbs. “Please don’t forget.”

Part of her didn’t understand exactly what had motivated her to put on her bikini. Naked and Spike weren’t exactly concepts which came together in the most natural of ways. But with him in her arms she felt as though she were cheating him—herself...them of something. It wasn’t right.

“You know I really do trust you, don’t you?”

Shifting his weight to one arm, she reached behind to loosen the fastening that held her bikini top together. It landed with a heavy splat as she discarded the soaked fabric onto the ground beside the tub. Topping up the bath with some more warm water, she drew her knees up to form a protective wall around him. He rested his cheek against her now bare breast and murmured in content, eyes falling shut. She stifled a gasp of surprise when he moved his head and his little lips brushed just shy of her nipple. She took one of his tiny hands in her own.

“Don’t forget me. Please, Spike, don’t forget me.”

She couldn’t help but think that this was the feeling she’d been missing since she’d returned from death. The only problem was, she didn’t know exactly what this feeling was. It was just...right.

To be continued...





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