Buffy was dreaming, no, actually she was just unconsciously replaying the conversation she had with Cisco earlier in its entirety for the third time since he had left the room and she had sniffled herself to sleep. His words seemed so simple, so easy, so why were they so damn hard to actually do?
She was up to the last things the priest said before he left … he’ll be fine, the Navoxnova likes him. I’ll go down later and make sure it isn’t trying to cocoon him again…likes to wrap him up…gets a bit sticky…when the knock on the door woke her. It was Duncan informing her that Father Sebastian had cleared a block of time in his schedule and would be able to see her in an hour. It was a summons if she had ever heard one and she needed a shower before she made her appearance.
___________
The noonday sun was shining brightly over the Slayer compound as Xander ran the squeegee down the glass one last time before pronouncing the job done. The glass in the massive second story bay window needed re-glazing anyway, might as well replace it now as wait for later after the panes had fallen out and it needed to be swept up off the terrace below. The new prismatic panes sparkled a bit more than regular glass and looking out over the grounds was like looking through those amber-colored shooters sunglasses but the window was now vamp-safe.
He was pleased with the glazing, but not so sure how he felt about the situation in general.
He missed Buffy, badly, and he knew that Willow and Giles did as well. Sure there were the visits; three or four, sometimes even five times a year, always business though with the promises of time spent just hanging out, watching a movie, having a night out on the town or even just talking the way they used to always left unfulfilled. There was never enough time and then there was the residual uneasiness of them disavowing her back during the last days in Sunnydale still hovering over them all these years later, he still couldn’t believe it had come to that, what were they thinking, sending her out into the night filled with Turok-hans and Bringers, whose sole purpose of existence was to kill Slayers, destroy the line starting with her and it was them: him, Willow, Giles, even Dawn, who threw her out of her our house into that night. Ah, but we Buffy- bashed first and bitched her out and blamed it all on her, he thought, before we tossed her out. With friends like us, who needs enemies?
There was only one… damn him…boy, that was redundant, Xand. It had to be him, the only one that stood by her, the only one that…believed in her. Grudgingly, he had to give him credit for that. He suddenly remembered the relief he felt when the peroxided pest went after her that night, knocking Faith on her ass and telling them all what splendid, caring, grateful friends they had been. It was the only time he had really hoped, even prayed, that he found her.
Remembering the conversation when Dawn first got back: “Just what is she going to do if she does find him,” he said, “…stake his sorry…”
“Xander!” Dawn and Willow both chorused back as they sorted and unpacked boxes.
“I can hope, can’t I? I mean, he could have called her, told her, vampires can use a telephone. I know this, point is he didn’t. She didn’t either but nobody seems to notice that.”
You know what it’s been like for her. She’s been handling Europe alone for all these years since…” Willow began.
“Hey! Standing here, right here.” Dawn protested “… not alone, I was there!”
“You know what I mean, you were a big help; you were her entire support system after we all came back here.” Willow felt a twinge of guilt. Her own reasons for coming back seemed selfish to her now, especially after Kennedy and she had begun to grow apart so shortly afterward. I should have went back to help her out. It’s not like they really needed me here. She was my best friend, is, she is my best friend, I hope…
“Hey, Buffy is a big Slayer now, she handled it,” he quipped.
“That is the point, Xander, she is a big girl now: none of us are kids anymore,” Willow said. “She is capable of making her own decisions without our help.”
“Guys, it’s been years, how do we even know there will be…
well, sparkage? I mean, how do we know ole Captain Peroxide hasn’t been varnishing every…” he stopped when he noticed the daggers being thrown at him from the sets of eyes pointed his way.
“What? Just saying maybe evil”…sharp, sharp daggers… “okay,” he conceded “… formally known as evil-dead-stalker guy finally got the message and moved on.”
“He loves her and even you know it, so quit pretending to be so opposed to the idea of a vamp in the house…again,” Willow added.
“I just don’t trust him not to hurt her…again.”
“I know, but sometimes you just have to trust even if it seems unreasonable. Xander, I don’t really think it is unreasonable. It feels …right… this time.” Willow busied herself with folding the unpacked clothes rather than try to explain what she had meant.
“His last relationship did last 118 years. You can’t exactly call that fickle,” Dawn added. “Besides, Buffy is finally able to admit it, she really is. I mean it. She has crossed the river Nile and landed on the other side. She loves him and she will find him.”
“Yeah but with Buffy’s track record with men…” Xander reconsidered finishing that thought as he looked at the two women staring at him, “...maps, I meant maps, she can’t read the…besides, I’d have to do more to get these rooms ready, those windows aren’t exactly…” as if on cue the breeze rattled the old glass panes.
“Well, maybe you should get some more of that vamp glass, the stuff they had you use on that night club, just in case, you know, she can make it from L.A. to San Francisco” Willow added.
He just sighed and shook his head…you’d think I’d have learned to pick my battles by now …the girls had won, again.
Turned out, it was actually cheaper than the regular grade, not that much demand and the old glass was about to fall out with the next good gust of wind anyway. The sight of the mini-van coming through the gate brought him back to the present; Faith was back. He gathered the rest of his tools and got ready to go greet her. He was really anxious to hear the news.
__________
Buffy felt acutely uneasy in Father Sebastian's study. The furnishings were comfy enough; it was the presence of the man himself that made her apprehensive.
"Can I offer you something to drink, Miss Summers," he asked, taking the stopper out of the carafe on the tray on his desk.
"No. Thank you. I'm fine," she said, trying not to fidget in the chair, "...and please, call me Buffy."
He replaced the stopper and sat down at his desk.
"First...Buffy," he said uncomfortable with the familiarity. "I would like to welcome you to the Mission. I hope your stay here will be pleasant," he paused then added,"...and uneventful in the 'Slayer’ sense."
"It has been, so far," she lied. "Brother Duncan said you had some 'business' to discuss with me. Does the Mission, or the Order, have need of a Slayer? I thought you guys were pretty much able to handle any demon-type issues on your own."
"We are not without...means…in that area, no, any routine matters of the "demon-type“, as you say, are generally resolved, promptly, within the Order and Spike and several others handle such matters in the community at large adequately. No, there are matters of a much broader scope we need to discuss."
"Broader scope," she asked.
"Shall we cover the personal issues first or the ones of a more general nature," he asked, settling back in his chair for a long conversation.
"Personal issues," she inquired, "I wasn't aware I had any...I mean, with you, anyway."
"Your sister, Dawn," he said, matter-of-factly.
"Dawn, what about Dawn," Buffy asked, beginning to get worried that this might be leading to something very bad.
"She is the Key."
Buffy was afraid of this. "Was." she said. "She was the Key. Past tense."
"Is," Father Sebastian corrected, "...she still is. When the Order made her human it did not change her essence; she will always be the Key, until the day she...dies…,” he said, “… and in all probability, even after that."
His words disturbed her. It had always been stuck somewhere in the back of Buffy’s mind, that Dawn would never be safe, never really be free of being the Key. She’d always thought...what if Glory wasn't the only one who knew Dawn was the Key. What if there were others...
"The order came into possession of the Key long ago," he began. "We were entrusted with the task of keeping it out of the hands of those who would attempt to use its power for the forces of darkness. There were, and still are, many that would use it for dark purposes, fortunately few have even an inkling of how to do so, that knowledge was lost millennia ago. Glorificus knew of one of the ways to use the Key, there are others."
Buffy had long feared this and now this priest was telling her it was so.
"Little was known," Father Sebastian continued, "...when we first gained custody of it, about the power of the Key and we still know little about its full range. It is hoped that now that the Key has sentient form it, or more appropriately, she, may be able to control the power independently, consciously."
"You want to use her for your own purposes," Buffy began. She was troubled with the direction this meeting was taking.
"I won't allow that."
"We don't wish to use her at all," he tried to reassure her, "...neither do we wish to see her used." His tone was soothing, "...wrongly used it would be disastrous for the universe, conceivably even to the point of annihilating it entirely."
"Then why even bring it up," she rushed to point out, "...why not just forget that she is the Key."
"But that it was that simple," he mused. "No, neither you, nor I, nor the Powers that Be, can change the fact that she is the Key; it is an absolute, a simple truth, irrefutable.
"Is she in danger," Buffy demanded.
"Not presently, not that we know of," he said, "but the potential is omnipresent. I have no doubt that it will need to be addressed in the future. The Order was wise in entrusting her to you."
"But," Buffy said more in response to what he wasn’t saying than to what he was, "...you want to take her away from me."
"No, to the contrary, I assure you. The key still needs to be protected from the forces of evil," he paused, "...and now that she has reached the age of maturity, the only way to safeguard the power of the Key is through Dawn. You can no longer protect her."
"I will always protect her," she said a warning tone in her voice.
"You will always try," he replied, "but you will not always be able to do so. In truth, you haven't been able to protect her for some time now."
Her look told him that he was not wrong.
"It is not your fault, such is the nature of life, but you already know this and that is not what we are discussing here."
Oddly, that was reassuring to her.
"To keep it safe she must be aware of it, she must understand it. She is, perhaps, the only one who can," he went on, "...and if it can be used in a positive way, it is Dawn who will have to discover how. If the power of the Key is ever to be actualized, it is through her, and her alone, otherwise it is corrupt and no good can ever come of power corrupted."
In her heart, Buffy knew this was true.
"What do you mean 'actualize' the power of the Key," she asked. "I thought if the barriers between dimensions broke down Chaos would follow."
"Yes," he said, "if they break down arbitrarily; they can be opened under controlled circumstances with little harm. They are unlocked and accessed all the time. I believe you have acquaintance with a practitioner of Wicca, a witch?"
Willow, Buffy thought; she nodded. "Yes."
"She can transverse dimensions: open a door, a window, step through it. She does so frequently, does she not?"
"I...guess she does," she had never really thought about it, but that was in effect what Willow did when she went to the astral plane, or even when she conjured something other worldly.
"Even you have,” he continued, “several times." She looked at him questioningly.
"You were brought back from a heavenly dimension," he elaborated, "...and I believe you once visited the shadow men, the original watchers and did you not?
Neither experience had been pleasant for her nor could she imagine why anyone would want to do it voluntarily, though rationally she could see the advantage in it.
"I won't let you or anyone else use her to open those doors against her will."
"We would not try," he said, "nor would we allow it, that is, in truth, the reason she came to you. No, this would only happen with her consent, she would have to be the one to use the power of the Key."
Buffy could sense the sincerity in his words. "I believe you," she said.
"That is good," he said, somewhat relieved that he would not have to use extraordinary methods to try to persuade her of an intent that was truly genuine.
For the first time during their conversation, Father Sebastian smiled and Buffy thought he might be both a charming and formidable ally.
"So, you want to teach her about the power of the Key, about her powers" she asked.
"No," he said, "...that is not our intention either, we cannot teach her anything about her power," he paused to arrange his next words carefully, "...she must come to her own enlightenment."
“Understand, there is little we know about the Key that would be of any use to her, we could teach her of her power only in a detached way, our knowledge of the Key is strictly in its ethereal form, not in its mortal one. We will, of course, make available any resources we have should she wish them. No, we merely wish to observe the path she takes more closely, at most to steer her away from the darkness and toward the light. Her natural inclinations have led her in directions that are for the most part, consistent with the forces of light, but she is human, she has all the human failings that could lead her astray and that would be dangerous for us all."
"So, what are you saying then," she asked confused by his words.
"Simply that we wish to observe her more closely than we have done in the past, in the event that intervention should become necessary when she does realize her power."
"Oh," she said.
"You have misgivings, I can see," he said, "...and I understand them, it is not something that must be done right away, but eventually she will need more knowledge; as I said, she may even seek it out. We want to ensure she seeks it in the right places. You may decide at your leisure but be aware that the time is coming. Soon," Sebastian added as he rose and went to the window.
"I will think about it," she said actually meaning that she would.
"Is there anything else, personal, I mean, before we get on with the Slayer stuff, "she asked.
"There is one more thing of a personal nature that we need to discuss."
Buffy could not possibly think of anything more personal they could talk about. She was wrong.
"Spike," he said, "...you plan on taking him with you when you go."
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Author's Chapter Notes:
A/N: Here beginith the second chapter.
A special thanks to all who have stayed with me and kept reading! Please keep those reviews coming.
A special thanks to all who have stayed with me and kept reading! Please keep those reviews coming.
Chapter End Notes:
To be continued...