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AUTHOR'S NOTES: Thanks for the awesome reviews everyone! Also, I found out recently that this story was nominated at the Sunnydale Memorial Fanfiction Awards a few months back, and I can't even really wrap my head around it. To see A Stanger In the Garden was even nominated beside the so many other amazing fanfics and authors on the award site is so amazing to me, and makes me absolutely giddy. So thank you SO much to whoever nominated/voted, it means so much to me. Now, I hope you enjoy the latest chapter of this story, and thanks for reading! *big hugs*
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Buffy woke up long after noon had come and gone. There was a warmth in her body, the sort of blissful sensation you experience when you've just enjoyed an uninterrupted night's rest, and now had all the time in the world to simply lie in bed. She raised her arms above her head in a languid stretch, smiling faintly beneath a stray beam of sunlight trickling in from the window.

Her muscles were all well used and flexible, leaving behind a kind of tingly feeling whenever she moved them. It was the sort of reminder that warmed her inside, physical evidence that spoke of a night spent in the heated embrace of a lover, and bed sheets properly tangled.

Buffy and Spike hadn't been able to keep off one another. She was sure her neck was decorated in blue and purple, and her right breast felt exquisitely tender from a bite he'd placed there. They had not once left the bedroom. He'd been inside her more than not, filling her body as she writhed and clenched around him.

It was purely impossible to fall asleep until they'd satisfied the mutual need for each other, touched and tasted every spare inch of flesh. And even when that moment came, their hunger remained only half satiated.

Now, hours later and rejuvenated from sleep, Buffy felt the desire for her mate gnawing at her insides, beginning to burn. She could hold off for a little while, but Buffy finally understood what all those books and internet searches had been talking about; it was virtually impossible to keep from touching Spike now that she had his blood in her system. Now that they were a part of each other, bound, magically entwined, just like they had physically been only hours ago, with his cock so deep inside her she could barely breathe.

Buffy could honestly say Spike was the best sex of her life, and no she wouldn't be telling him that, because she could only imagine the size to which his ego would grow. All they'd done last night was love each other. Held on tight as they fucked and bit and scratched, a lust driven inability to control themselves injected into their veins. Yet, that hunger had left little room for experimentation. They learned every contour and curve of each other's bodies, but the craving to simply touch time after time was so strong that neither of them had given a care to spontaneity or inventiveness.

Still, thinking about it all quickly conjured a smile and made her insides burn.

Buffy was just hoping, now that they had managed to sate their mutual hunger a little, that she would have the patience to try more with Spike. She had learned what he liked, of course, and paid attention to the things he said,- whispers and words that made her blush thinking about them now -but Buffy wanted to do everything with him, until all their nerves were exhausted from overstimulation; and then do it over again.

She opened her eyes finally, rubbing the sleep from them as she looked to her left. Spike was slumbering, his mouth hanging open, chest unmoving. Her heart skipped a beat as she stared at him, and felt him. Somehow the essence of his existence was like a new sense of her own, an awareness, something as ordinary to Buffy as taste or sound.

It was strange, but in a good way, and Buffy didn't try to make sense of it. She stared at him with love in her eyes for anyone to see, but of course no one could. They were completely alone, and she had never felt so at peace.

Last night's events featuring Hank Summers the Vampire were fresh and unhappy memories in her mind, but Buffy hastily pushed them away. She didn't want to think about any of that, and she didn't find it necessary at the moment. She was sure the unsettled disappointment would arise again the next time she looked at her car. There was no need to rush it along.

She was a mated woman now, completely and unashamedly belonging to the man she loved and who loved her in return. Sour thoughts about her dad would just have to wait. She was busy basking in the glow, enjoying the utter peace that filled up her heart like the sun filled a morning sky. Besides, the person she most wanted to vent to about her father, and seek comfort from, was currently asleep.

And looking entirely too edible for his own good.

Buffy sighed, and smiled gently at Spike, a vampire who was completely lost in the world of dreams. Later would definitely be the time to dwell on things that were disconcerting, including the worrisome concept of talking to Dawn.

She was glad it was Saturday, otherwise work would have gotten blown off for sure.

Buffy continued to sit for a while, gazing at her vampire, knees bent and tucked beneath her chin. His pale, muscled abdomen and chest were covered in fading red lines, marks she had given him, evidence of her own loss of control. He made her scream, had her begging him to do what he would so long as he kept filling her over and over again, until finally feeling like she was soaring and falling at once when she came, clawing at her only anchor. The bite wound on his throat was ragged and bruised, but she didn't flinch, and felt only a small inkling of regret for causing the damage. Otherwise, it was all pride, combined with a heap of desire at knowing Spike belonged to her now, was hers and hers alone.

She hugged her knees, trying to refrain from pouncing on him as she continued her inspection. His body was truly beautiful, like something out of a fiction romance novel. He was naked from the waist up, exposed to the warm air in the room. The window had been opened and was letting in summery breezes that fluffed out the curtains.

Buffy almost gasped when she realized there was a ray of sunlight cast over the blanket, lying threateningly across Spike's legs. He was protected by the comforter, but Buffy still moved so as to block the ray, scooting closer. She placed her thighs over his lap so the sunshine rested across her skin instead. No crispy vampire today.

She could have simply gotten up to close the darker curtains, the ones that would sufficiently block the sunlight from entering the room completely, but Buffy didn't really want to leave the bed. The sheet and comforter were both partially covering her, modestly hiding her breasts, while her legs were bare and now comfortably resting atop Spike. She was feeling incredibly content.

Ironically, just as she had the thought, Buffy's bladder suddenly reminded her it was still inside her body and working better than ever. Her eyebrows came together in an annoyed frown as she failed to stifle a groan, and tossed the blanket off in order to rise from the bed.

She made it to the edge, then an arm suddenly reached out and wrapped around her waist, tugging her backwards. Buffy squealed and found she had one very awake vampire on her hands, clutching her to him as if she'd been about to disappear from the face of the earth.

Her back pressed into his chest and she moaned as a vibration of pleasure went through her. Knowing Spike was awake, feeling her mate against her, it was heavenly and would have been perfect if she didn't still have to pee.

"Where do you think you're going?" he murmured, his deadly quiet tone sending chills up and down her spine. Buffy clenched her thighs together for two reasons now.

"Can't you tell?" she asked. "With the connection complete and everything, I'd think you would have guessed already."

Spike wedged closer, and pressed his face into her tangled hair before nuzzling her throat with his nose and lips. Buffy shivered. "The only thing I know," he said, "is that you were leaving this bed, and I don't plan on letting you do that for a very long time."

She tried valiantly hard not to melt but was only half successful. "I need to go to the bathroom." Her words were part desperate declaration, out of fear she'd never relay the news if he kept diligently showing attention to the claim mark like he was, and part bashful admission. The man could make you forget your own name at times, and she was sure she would forget her motivation for leaving the bed in just a moment if she didn't do so soon.

Spike let out a little groan, but reluctantly released his hold on her body. Buffy was only partially relieved. She was about to roll away when he stopped her again, laying a gentle touch on her bare shoulder. She looked back at him with a question in her eyes.

"I just want to feel the sun on your skin," he whispered.

Buffy froze, stunned and a little confused, before he suddenly moved his hand to her sheet covered hip. A ray of sunlight spread over her bare thighs, and his hand inched towards it.

"Spike, don't-!"

"Shh," he interrupted her protest, "I'll be fine, love. Relax."

Buffy was frowning so hard her forehead hurt, and her heart was suddenly beating a mile a minute. She watched as Spike's fingers moved into the sunbeam, her blood running cold. Trying to fight the tingles she felt where he touched her, her throat tightened when his flesh began to smoke, and Spike gasped, but it didn't sound as if from pain alone.

His palm flattened, pressed and caressed her smooth, sun warmed skin, and Buffy met his eyes in wonder and worry. She could smell the burning.

But his eyes. Oh, his eyes were a brilliant, glossy shade of blue reverence as they stared at his own hand on her leg, her leg that was bathed in sunlight, something he shouldn't be allowed to touch. But he did, and somehow Buffy knew it was because Spike wouldn't be denied his right to touch her anywhere he pleased. He wanted to know how she felt when warmed by the heat of the sun, something deadly to him, but something that helped to keep her alive.

Her nerves refused to cease their erratic quaking, even when he said, "Christ, you feel amazing- Always do, of course." He finally looked to her face again, and Buffy noticed traces of pain in his adoring eyes. "I like how the sun lies on you, keeps you warm. You were made to soak in it."

Buffy swallowed hard, and it felt like a weight fell off her chest when Spike pulled his sizzling hand out of the beam of light. She'd been two seconds away from doing it herself, but waited as long as she could so as not to give Spike the wrong impression. God, it felt as if she'd just lost ten years off eternity.

She let out a long exhale, and was sorely tempted to kiss him until he knew nothing else but the taste of her. But he laid a tender peck on her shoulder and then nudged her to move. "Go on now, before you wet the bed."

His attempt at levity made Buffy smile, but before she could go she had to say one thing. Leaning in close, she murmured, "I look good in the moonlight, too, Spike."

She felt joy spread from her head to her toes when the look of surprise crossed his face, followed by pleasure, and a tenderness that would never fail to leave her weak in the knees.

She finally wiggled to the edge of the bed and dropped the sheet. Pouting at having to leave, Buffy saw Spike wore a similar expression when she turned around.

His eyebrow rose then, the pout swiftly fading as he said, "Better hurry up, pet. Standing there starkers isn't soothing my patience a bit."

Buffy smiled again and quickly ran to grab her robe from the closet, then slipped it on before pulling the thicker curtains closed over the window to block out all deadly sunlight. She left the room in a rush, striding determinedly down the hall.

She was in and out of the bathroom in under two minutes, and fast heading back to Spike. She entered the bedroom and found her mate was about to leave the bed. When he saw her, he relaxed. "Oh. I was just going to come and get you."

"I was only gone for a second."

"Still too long," he griped bashfully, looking down at the floor. His blue gaze rose again and zeroed in on where Buffy was biting her lip. He reached a hand towards her. "Come here."

She started forward, only to pause as her foot bumped into something. Frowning, she bent to pick up a piece of paper lying beside her toes.

"What is it?" Spike asked.

Buffy shook her head and unfolded it, her eyes quickly scanning the missive, before widening.

Darla had slipped a note under the door.

"It's from Darla."

"And? What's the bird want?"

"It- She says that when we're through to- to let her know so she can take her earplugs out."

Spike just stared at her, not saying a word. Then, when Buffy wasn't sure whether or not he would ever actually respond, the vampire burst out laughing. Robust, hearty laughter that made the walls shake, and it came fast and loud. Buffy fought off her own little snicker at his enjoyment, not at the note. This was embarrassing! Neither of them should find it amusing.

"It isn't funny," she said, but even Buffy realized how unconvincing she sounded. A sigh rolled passed her lips as Spike continued to cackle and clutch at his stomach. He was shaking with mirth, and she finally rolled her eyes when she noticed tears streaming from his.

"That is rich," he exclaimed. "Turns out the bint actually has a sense of humor, who'd have thought, eh?" More giggles and snickers wheezed from his lips, and Buffy groaned even as she gave up fighting her own reluctant smile.

She set the note which had caused the uproar on her dresser. Honestly, she did feel a bit bad about Darla, and what the poor vamp had been dealing with all night from them. The sound of a headboard banging against the wall wasn't exactly a lullaby; that earplug anecdote was probably true.

"I don't know what a 'bint' is," Buffy told Spike, "but don't call my friend that." She walked around the edge of the bed and undid her robe, then dropped it on a chair by the window.

Spike met her halfway as she approached him, all laughter gone from his eyes when he took her hand and pulled her back into bed. She folded against him, cuddling close as he lifted the sheet and pulled it over her legs, leaving his hand trapped beneath. He stroked her skin and goose bumps rose in an instant.

Buffy felt the fire beginning to flicker to life inside her, her heartbeat speeding up. She recognized that familiar longing in her gut, and pressed her breasts against his chest as he leaned down, rolling her onto her back. He stared into her eyes, his own shimmering with a sober light.

"You still love me?" he asked.

Buffy opened her mouth in surprise, then smiled. A slow, warm smile, even as she sensed the nervousness in Spike's mind and heart. "I love you," she said.

Awe and indescribable bliss suddenly flowed through their connection like a river. Spike bent down and kissed her. Buffy opened her arms, moaning as his fingers danced wickedly down her side, tiny invisible traces of magic following them. One hand moved to her head, where he took grip on her hair as the other smoothed around her body to grab her ass, pulling her up into a roll of his hips.

Buffy felt an ache already starting to form at her center. Desire travelled through her, heating her blood, making her body feel light and laden at once. She moaned as he curved his touch around her hip, feathering downward until his hand was nestled between her thighs.

Buffy gasped against his mouth, shuddering as he ran a finger through her slick folds. He circled then pinched her clit, drawing a moan from her. He changed direction, dipping into the wetness gathering at her entrance. "You like that, sweetheart?" She answered with a sound that wasn't a word in any language, eliciting a chuckle from the vampire above her who was doing his best to tease, and drive her out of her mind.

When he slipped two long, attentive fingers inside her pussy, Buffy moaned again, her hips jerking off the bed of their own volition.

Spike groaned. She was so hot, felt like soaked velvet around him. His touch was pulling in and out, drawing little quivers and gasps from Buffy as he studiously avoided her throbbing clit. The woman was a bleeding temptress, a siren calling out to him, with her head thrown back and her eyes closed tight. Biting her lips, making all sorts of little sounds that drove him insane. His control was quickly fading like shadows at dawn.

She was panting against Spike's throat when he pulled his busy fingers away to finally pay attention to the place that needed it most. He rubbed her throbbing clit with exquisite gentleness, a vibration of hot need wracking through her body. Buffy's eyes shot open and met his, black filled orbs that were speckled with amber. She was looking into the gaze of the man who had once made her so angry, and so afraid. The vampire who stood below a tree in her backyard time and again, staring up at a window while she hid from him. Her mate. The idea was so foreign now, felt so far away. Buffy could never imagine cutting herself off from Spike ever again.

As her hips began lifting into the movements of his hand, he stopped touching her, and she felt a thick sense of loss spiral through her body. Until Spike began to circle her dripping entrance once more.

Buffy keened, impatience and lust rising from her skin just like beads of sweat. Spike was so frustratingly patient, his touched too slow and measured. Couldn't he see that she was losing it? She felt herself near begging for him to slip his cock inside her again, to make her whole.

And then she saw the mark she'd left on his throat last night, and decided to see what would happen when she-

"Ahh!" Spike groaned harshly. Colors danced before his eyes until they crossed, as he felt Buffy's blunt teeth bite into the claim mark she'd placed on him, and he plunged his fingers back inside her, pumping and letting her writhe into his strokes, hitting the sweet spot against the heel of his hand every time. He waited for the pull of his blood, and the ecstasy that would follow.

He was shocked when Buffy moved away from him, moaning and then chuckling evilly like she was proud of herself. "You tease, I tease," she said, and continued to arch her body and swallow up his fingers.

Spike growled, his eyes flashing yellow amber before yanking his touch away from her, and pinning her hips to the bed. Buffy gasped as he wrapped her hair in both of his hands, holding her in place. His body had her trapped, and his cock was nudging her pussy. He could practically feel the fluttering walls, sense the burn that would come when he plunged inside.

Buffy looked up, a thrill running through her while she stared at the bright eyes and sharp fangs of his demon. A spirited humming jostled her within, greed and impatience grasping hands like long lost friends as the claim recognized its other half. Every nerve trembled when he ran his swollen erection up and down her slit, using just his hips for movement, and a pitiless smirk crossed his face. "Spike..." she sighed.

"You," he said, "are going to have to learn a lesson or two about teasing, baby." He tugged on her hair, then leaned down and raked his fangs along the arched column of her throat, skimming the several bite marks he'd left behind. It felt like hot wax was dripping onto her skin, burning heat turning instantly to shivers when he paid special attention to the mark that proved his ownership. "You'll never get away with it, unless I want you to."

His raspy murmur made her shudder violently, lighting Buffy's blood, causing her thighs to tense and pussy to throb. She whimpered unconsciously, and upon hearing the noise, Spike bit her. His fangs imbedded deeply into her skin, and his cock rammed inside her. Her clit throbbed as she rose her body into the deep thrusts, his pelvis grinding against her cleft, spreading her open. A piercing, consuming reaction shook her until she thought she would fall over the edge and never stop, until the threat of oblivion was real, and Buffy couldn't hold onto Spike tight enough.

Heat and want were like puppet strings. "Oh God..." she gasped, a cry ripping at her throat. "Spike!" His arms banded around her back, holding her so tight she was sure her ribs would crack. Deep, grinding strokes pulled out a pleasured scream while Spike continued to sup from her throat. Ecstasy ran through Buffy like a shot, and she fell over the edge. Her nails left red streaks on his shoulders and back. Spike snarled, gripping her as his cock slammed into Buffy's writhing body, as the trails she left on his skin caused enough pain for his demon to howl in rapture. He climaxed with Buffy's blood coating his throat and her pussy strangling him until he was ready to pass out.

Buffy's arms fell to the side and her labored breathing finally drowned out the sound of her heartbeat, gulps of air flying passed her lips. She smiled as both warmth and a deep sense of calm radiated out from every nerve. She felt Spike's fangs leave her neck, and as he panted against her abused throat, he licked her skin clean.

The sensation soothed her wounds. They would heal properly soon, Spike knew, but even as much as he liked Buffy wearing his mark, seeing such bruising and bloodiness on her neck made him feel a bit contrite. "They'll heal quickly," he told her.

She opened her drowsy eyes to look up at him, no worry or anxiousness present at all. "Okay."

"With the connection, you'll get some extra healing abilities now," he added.

"I know. Except for the faint scarring," she sighed contentedly, moving her limbs so they were all cuddled beneath Spike's body. He was staring at her in surprise. "I did read about this stuff. Just like some annoying vampire told me I should."

Spike smiled then. "Thought you weren't one to follow orders, love."

"Well..." Buffy gave him an impish grin. "I'll listen to them if the incentive is good enough." She raised her hips, making him groan as she flexed her inner muscles around his cock. "And I'd say that you're a pretty good one, Spikey." When she felt him stiffening inside her, she couldn't help giggling. "How about that vampire stamina, huh? The books sure weren't lying about that."

He thought he might dust if Buffy kept looking at him all happy and teasing like, or shag her until neither of them could bloody walk, at least. But then, her glittering eyes grew warm, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Spike, I haven't ever..." She bit her lip, frowning softly, suddenly tentative. "I've never felt this way about someone before. I guess I... just want you to know that." A blush rose to her cheeks.

How she could blush when he was still balls deep inside of her well loved body, Spike had no fucking clue, but it just made him fall all over again. This woman made him feel like he'd been living in a fog until the moment he'd met her, like everything up to finding Buffy was a half forgotten dream or something equally dim and unimportant.

Spike couldn't resist kissing her senseless, and when he pulled away, he spoke with his heart in his eyes and a surge of awareness for the dead organ that didn't beat inside his chest. "I love you so much, it makes me feel bloody faint sometimes."

She snickered, and he rose an inquiring brow. "We're just really cheesy," she said.

"It's too bad I don't give a damn, ain't it?" he said, and she laughed as Spike bent to nibble along her jaw line. Moving down to the claim mark, he licked the angry bite wound and she released a pleasured sigh, desire mixing with comfort. Her body clenched around him, squeezing his cock until he needed to fight down his demon. His fangs itched to come out and play again, but Spike ignored the urge. He had abused her throat enough for one night and day.

Buffy moaned as he began pumping his hips. Her tired legs came up to wrap around his waist, pulling him deeper as she lifted into his thrusts. A familiar shiver raced down her spine. When they moved like this it was as if the world had become nothing but a ghost, like it refused to dare touch the couple who moved together in uncaring passion and love. Every yearning wish she had was granted, every need and physical thirst quenched. The claim was a live, loud thing, constantly wanting sex and blood. Buffy was happy to oblige, and fortunately enough, Spike had the same appetite as she, with the vampire abilities to satisfy them.

***

An hour later, they lay beside each other. sweaty and gasping. Buffy fell almost immediately into a dozing state, and Spike curled her closer. Her right leg was thrown over his, her other tucked between his thighs. He kept her chest pressed against him, his cock still half inside her warmth. It was impossible to move from the bed, simply impossible.

They were anything but logical today, bending to the whims of their emotions without a care in the world. It felt like a fairytale. Their lust, combined with and stemming from the claim, was voracious. When he wasn't inside her in some way, it felt like he needed to be. Not that Spike minded, and Buffy was getting stronger with every passing second. He had read somewhere that the more contact a human mate had with their vampire directly after a claim was completed, could enable said human to obtain supernatural perks quicker than standard, but he wasn't betting on that.

He was betting on the way he felt, on the senses that told him Buffy was rapidly getting stronger, and healing quicker. She'd even run faster soon enough, and it was inevitable that his girl was already immortal.

The last was something they'd talked about fairly often, because the concept of eternity was strange to a woman who had never believed she would live longer than a hundred years, at the most. It was a paltry amount of time to a vamp; Buffy would feel the same after she lived it.

The worst part of this would be when she lost her family and friends. Spike suddenly felt incredibly grateful for Darla, a fellow immortal being who would no doubt make living forever much easier on his mate.

Buffy might love him, but she couldn't lose everyone else she cared about in this world, not without suffering deeply each and every time. Darla was one less person she would have to, sooner or later, live without.

He knew it had been a severe concern of Buffy's at one point, but after resigning herself to the claim and its finality, she'd also begun to accept the negatives of living longer than her friends and family. She once told Spike that as long as everyone she cared about lived long, happy lives, Buffy believed she could get through it. And, as long as she had him at her side.

As of now, she was only concerned with the present, and that was how she needed to live. She had the whole of eternity ahead of her now, and since they were mated, their connection would remain eternal, too. Even in the afterlife. Whatever that turned out to be.

It made Spike a little nervous, not knowing, but he was sure Buffy wouldn't fall into a hell dimension. She couldn't. The Powers That Be wouldn't allow it, even if she loved a vampire. Spike knew he and Buffy would always be together, for a claim was an unbreakable bond, he just didn't know how.

He didn't know how his evil self was going to remain at the side of an angel, because that's what Buffy was, a pure, unpolluted soul, with so much love in her heart that Spike was warmed every time she looked at him.

Perhaps he would be allowed into a heavenly dimension. There could be no peace for him if he and Buffy were separated after death, and The Powers might not care about that, but they'd care about Buffy. She wouldn't rest anywhere without him either. There might have to be a place of neutral ground, somewhere they could both go together.

The world was filled with gray, there was very little good and evil, black and white. Everything was indistinguishable. The Powers had to have a way of dealing with those shades, especially when they created them

As Spike pressed his face into Buffy's wealth of hair and inhaled her scent, he was ridiculously appreciative for the meddling. No matter how irritated he'd been at the beginning, he had the love of his life and unlife in his arms now, because of The Powers That Be and their pairing methods. As it was, Spike planned on making sure he and his mate lived together on this earth until doing so was no longer possible.

"Why are you all with the gloomy?" Buffy murmured.

Spike blinked and looked down at her just as she opened her eyes. "I thought you were sleeping," he said.

"I was just dozing. Then I felt you getting all tense and serious. What's up?"

"Nothing, sweets. Thinking about some things is all."

"What things?" she urged.

"It's not important."

"I say it is. Tell me."

Spike sighed. A knot formed in his stomach, but he relented when he saw how curious she was; he wouldn't be able to convince her to let this go. "I was thinking about where we might end up when we..."

"What?" she asked, her green eyes filling rapidly with perceptiveness. "When we die?" At his strained, and somewhat abashed expression, Buffy nearly guffawed. "Seriously? I never realized you could be so depressing."

"I didn't mean for you to figure where my mind went, irritating chit," he quipped.

"I know, I know, it's just..." Her voice softened. "I don't think you have to worry about any of that. I mean, I think we'll be together... in the end. I know that claims are... well, they're strong bonds."

"Unbreakable," Spike said. Devotion laced the word.

"Right. So why wouldn't we get to be together after...?"

"There's nothing saying we wouldn't be, I'm just not sure... how it'll be done."

She scowled. "Wow, you really were getting philosophical over there, weren't you?"

Spike rolled his eyes. "I'm evil, love. Traditionally, once you're a vamp, you're damned. But you're good, Buffy." He frowned as the words to explain himself appeared fitful in his head. "I'm figuring there's got to be some middle ground where we'll both settle after we call this world quits, because as much as the blokes at the top don't care about me, they care about you."

Buffy's scowl only darkened, and she placed a hand over his quiet heart. She thought on what he was saying, trying to ignore the pit deepening in her stomach. As much as she truly believed things would work out for them, talking about a death she couldn't even estimate the time of anymore unnerved her. Talking about Spike's death almost made her sick.

After a moment of worrying her lip between her teeth, Buffy raised her eyes to his again. "I don't think they'll damn you, Spike."

"Because I'm with you," he reiterated.

"No, because you were chosen to be with me."

He shook his head slightly. "What are you getting at?"

"Well, you said vampire and human claims were rare, right?" At his nod, she added, "And that if you get stuck with a human mate, you don't get any others to choose from, right?"

Again, Spike confirmed her reflection, and Buffy said, "Then there has to be a reason why only a few vampires are meant to have human partners. Maybe it's not just a roll of the dice. Maybe it means that there's something special about you."

At his silence, and the apprehensive look that had entered his eyes, Buffy carefully went on. "Mated pairs aren't guaranteed love," she murmured. "And you said that a lot of vampires don't know how to love, but you do. Darla does. Neither of you are normal, and it has been hard to understand that for me, but now that I feel you..." Buffy trailed off, before taking a deep breath. "You saved my sister Spike, before you even knew she was my sister. You thought she was just some girl."

He clenched his jaw, muttering a curse. "I knew you'd hate me if I just passed by without doing anything. I didn't help her because I wanted to, pet. I did it because I didn't want to disappoint you."

Her heart warmed and she had to halt a gasp from leaving her lungs, but Buffy gathered her wits quickly, and said, "That's not even typical vampire behavior from what I've read Spike. You, and Darla, too, are very... weird, for lack of a better word. I think maybe those Powers That Be you talk about realize it."

What she said made some bizarre kind of sense, but Spike knew too much about his own past to be so inclined to agree with the theory. "You don't know what I've done." He shook his head, and looked down. "You couldn't love me if you did."

She glowered so fiercely at him that Spike felt it in his bones and glanced up again, only to widen his eyes after meeting hazel green orbs of glinting anger. "You obviously don't realize how I love you then."

He sent her a timid, question filled look, and Buffy sighed with disgust. "I read about you, okay?!" A terrified panic entered his eyes, but Buffy went on. "You might have told me some things, and I know that if I had kept asking you would've told me more, but I found a couple books about William the Bloody, Spike, The Slayer of Slayers- You have a lot of names for one person. The point is, I found information, and I read until I wanted to cry."

The panic swelled until it was a living thing, running through his muscles and hardening every one. Without his conscious control, Spike's grip on Buffy tightened, clutching out of fear of her leaving the bed, leaving him.

It was one thing to have a claim keep someone with you; it was something completely different to have them stay because they loved you.

"I know what you are, and what you've done, but it doesn't make me love you any less."

He tirade ended with that final sentence, but a hollowness had filled Spike's chest, rendering him speechless. He didn't feel capable of talking, and Spike knew that if he tried, the only thing to come out might be a breathless whimper. She couldn't have read all the details of his past, and still treat him like he was good enough to touch her. She couldn't have.

Yet she did. "Maybe that makes me a selfish person, to some," Buffy said, "but I don't think so. As upset as I was, not even the claim can explain how I feel about you. You're a monster to so many, but you're also a predator. And still you treat me like a man should. You care about me. That's what I was scared of; of you not-..." She shook her head and ran her hand up his chest and neck, finally resting it where his pulse would be if he had one. Her eyes were filled with understanding, and devotion. "I didn't need to worry. I know that now. Neither of us can change the past and you had no reason to change, Spike. You're a vampire. I love you in spite of the evil things you've done... and I don't think we would have been chosen for each other if The Powers didn't believe you had the ability to control your impulses, given a reason."

Spike swallowed. His teeth were grinding together as he pulled Buffy on top of him. If he ever lost this woman, in life or in true death, it would utterly destroy every part of him. "I'm not a changed man. I'm still a demon." He wanted to weep over the admission; Gods help him, but he would try to do good, if only for Buffy. Always for Buffy.

She ran her fingers through his hair, managing to inhale a shaky breath even with him squeezing her body so tightly. "You once told me that you wanted to give me what I deserve, Spike. As far as I'm concerned, you are exactly that. And more."





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