~*The first time I laid my eyes on you, I knew
We'd spend this life side by side
I still feel the same though you're so far away
I swear that you'll always be my,
Forever Love...*~




"Son, please don't act like this. The new slayer will be here at any moment."


And of course those words just made Spike even madder.


"Do I have to tell you how much I hate this?"


Giles sighed and pulled his glasses away to clean them.


"No, you don't."


"I don't even know why I have to be here, I mean, just because you--" His words trailed into silence, when the library doors opened and an angel walked through them.


He couldn't think and he couldn't breath, but his heart was singing in his chest.


And somehow he knew.


He knew that this girl would be his future.


His hands trembled as she walked in front of him and his knees nearly buckled when she smiled.


"Hi."


He couldn't say anything, he just stood there staring at her.


"I'm Buffy."


Giles walked back into the room and gave Buffy a smile.


"Ms. Summers, how nice to meet you. I'm Rupert Giles and this is my son William."


She blushed when he was still awestruck and allowed Giles to lead her toward his office.


Spike snapped out of his stare when she passed and he turned around, following her with his eyes. She turned back toward him and gave him another smile and this time he returned it.


Sunnydale was getting better and better.




~*Minutes and hours and years may go by
But my heart knows nothing of time...*~





"Spike."


He woke with a start and his eyes searched for Buffy. He looked around the library and when he finally looked at Xander, he knew the moment their eyes met.


It was a dream.


"Spike, we're gonna head over to the Bronze, wanna come with?"


He didn't look up as he shook his head and Xander nodded, slowly walking away. He stopped inside the doors, and spoke without facing Spike.


"You know, she didn't give her life for yours, just for you to do this. She died so you could live."


Spike clenched his fists together and stared at the table, the words cutting into him.


"And just so you know," Xander turned his head and looked at him. "You're not the only one she left behind."


The doors closed and Spike jumped to his feet, knocking over his chair. He grabbed the closest weapon to him and headed for the cemetary.


No, he wasn't the only one.


But he was the reason she's gone.






~*Love is the road to our destiny
Nothing can change what's meant to be...*~





"Cordy, I just...I don't know, I just want to shake him sometimes. She died for him to live, not sit around and mope. I miss her too, God, do I miss her, but if she died for me, then--"


"You don't even get it do you? You just said the words, but you don't understand them. She died for him. And he knows that, he lives with it everyday. Knowing that she took his place, that it should have been him."


Understanding dawned on him and Xander looked around the table, tears coming to his eyes.


"He thinks it's his fault, doesn't he?" They nodded their heads.


"And not to mention the fact that he loves her. He's lost the woman he loves, to something that was meant for him."


Willow shook her head and peered at her friends through tear filled eyes.


"I don't know. Buffy chose to die for him, for love. Maybe that was her destiny."


"I don't know either. But I have to find him, I need to talk to him, make sure he's okay."





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



They found him at her grave. He was holding onto her tombstone as he wept.


Xander knelt beside him and pulled him into a tight embrace, tears of his own soaking Spike's hair.


"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, Spike."


Spike held onto him as he shook and soon Willow, Cordelia and Oz, were wrapped around them as well.


Their tears poured onto her grave as the wind blew around them.





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