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CHAPTER 5: Lean on me, part 3


Faith was just turning around when she found herself violently slammed against the wall by an out of control vampire in full game face.


“You let her go you fucking dead bitch! How could you let her go!?”


“Whoa big boy, back off and calm down. Matter of semantic really. A choice of words. You say ‘let go’ but I’d rather say that I merely added a variant into the equation. Made things more exciting. I just wanted to see if a half-dead girl, who had been through hours of torture, could manage to get a key from the floor to her hands locked above her head and escape. Scientific experiment, nothing else.” She gave Angelus her sweetest smile.


“I’m gonna rip your head off you stupid cow…”


“Hey! Is it my fault if even half-dead, Buffy still bested you? Face it Angelus, you’re pathetic…”


Angelus got yanked away from Faith just as he was about to rip her throat open with his fangs.


“Enough! Will you two stop acting like kids? Could you try to see the bigger picture instead of focusing on your own little personal issues?” Lilah looked positively furious. “God damn it! The ritual is tomorrow night, can’t it wait? You’ll have eternity to make the little bitch pay for whatever the hell it is she’s supposed to pay for. Grow up already.”


The Slayer and Angelus glared at each other with daggers in their eyes. He growled threateningly and walked away leaving the two women together.


“Enough games Faith.”


“Games? What the Hell are you talking about? I’m not the one playing games, it’s that stupid dumb ass who can’t…”


“Enough!” Lilah took a deep breath to calm herself down before she would lose control and finish what Angelus had started. “Are you ready for tomorrow night?”


“Sure. Do I look dumb? How hard is it? Put black robe on, chant, chant, bla, bla, chant, bla, big blast of evil energy going through me, than the underworld belongs to us. Well, to be more specific, to me.”


“I’m not kidding Faith. There is no rehearsal. No second chance. You must know all the words by heart and be ready not to let anything interrupt you. We’re gonna have people guarding the perimeter, but you never know what could happen. Do you understand? If they find out the ritual is tomorrow and try to interrupt it, we’ll do anything possible to keep them away from you, but if one of them comes too close, you must keep chanting no matter what. Are you ready?”


Faith remained silent for a moment, then nodded.


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It was late morning, and Spike was asleep with his head on the pillow next to Buffy’s, his hand holding hers.


She'd woken up in pain twice during the night, and Spike had nearly dragged the nurse to the room so she would give her something against the pain. They probably thought he was a psycho, over protective, boyfriend, but there was no way in Hell he was gonna let her feel anymore pain after what she went through already.


She’d had nightmares, trashing in her sleep, and he'd stayed awake to comfort her the best he could. But as soon as she seemed more peaceful, he let go and fell asleep, completely exhausted physically and mentally.


Giles had come into the room just before sunrise and shut the curtains to make sure Spike wouldn’t wake up in flames. After checking on them, he'd gone back to the waiting room where the Scoobies were sound asleep in uncomfortable plastic chairs.


Buffy slowly woke up, trying to remember where she was and what happened. She regretted it when the memories came flowing back. She closed her eyes tightly to hold back the tears. She had always been the tough one, the strong one, created to endure pain, and being weak was not something Buffy Summers had an easy time dealing with. The entire time it had lasted, it wasn’t the pain that was wearing her down, it was the fact that the pain was too much for her to bear.


She had been weak, and she hated every second of it. That, and the loneliness. The feeling of loneliness never get any stronger than when you are in pain. Because you are alone in it. It’s already hard enough when you are surrounded by your loved ones, there is no words to describe it when you are surrounded by hate. Panic was threatening to invade her as she remembered the last hours.


“It’s over Buffy. You’re safe and I won’t let anything happen to you, ever again.”


She tried to move in the bed, wanted to be in his arms, but she couldn’t. The pain stopped her and it upset her even more. Seeing that, Spike tried to lie down next to her and put his arms around her small form, being careful not to hurt her. She calmed down, trying to regain control of herself.


They both lay there, in silence, until her tears dried out.


“I can’t start to imagine what you’ve been through. I am so sorry luv. It is all my fault.” Spike felt the adrenaline that had been holding him up for the past thirty-something hours leaving him, and tears started filling up his eyes. He wiped at them angrily. “All my bloody fault! I threw you in his arms.”


Buffy pushed weakly on his chest so she could look at him in the eyes. “What the hell are you talking about. It’s not your fault.”


“Yes. It is. If it wasn’t for my God damn smokes, you would have been safely tucked in bed.”


“Spike, stop it. I don’t know why you’re trying to blame this on yourself, but it’s nobody’s fault, especially not yours. I wanted to go out. I chose to. You didn’t even ask me to, you wanted me to stay, remember? I went because I wanted to. And if it weren’t for your cigarettes, I would have still gone anyway. I had decided I wanted ice cream, and you know how stubborn I can be…”


“I shouldn’t have let you go by yourself. Not after the fight we just had with the wanker and his cow. It never even crossed my mind that it was dangerous. I should have been there with you.”


Buffy let herself back down on the thin hospital pillow and looked at him through heavy eyelids. “Then what? The two of us would have been kidnapped and tortured? Who would have saved me if he had taken you too? He would have, you know. You wouldn’t have been able to do anything more than I did. They would have just taken the two of us instead of just me. This guy took complete control of my body; he was making me follow them like an obedient little dog. It would have been the same if you were there, and we would probably be dead by now.”


She closed her eyes, exhausted. “So I’m gonna say this one more time, and I never want to hear it again. It wasn’t your fault.”


Spike put his head on the pillow next to hers. “What would I have done without you?” he asked in a soft voice filled with fear and pain. All the fear and pain he had accumulated over the last thirty hours. She heard it. Understood it. And at that moment, she knew that she hadn’t been alone after all. He had been there with her every step of the way. Terrified, just like her. For her.


“Don’t think like that, ok? I’m here, I’m ok, that’s all that matters.”


They stayed silent for a while. Spike thought she was sleeping, but she suddenly opened her eyes. “What time is it?”


“What?..”


“What time is it Spike? It’s important…”


He got up to look at the clock in the hall in front of her room. “It’s 11am luv. Why?”


“It’s happening tonight. We don’t have much time left. Go get the others.”


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Buffy tried to sit up when they walked in but she soon gave up. Spike came to stand next to her. He was shifting from one foot to the other, uncomfortable under the other’s look. The night before, they had seen him in an emotional state he couldn’t even begin to describe. None of the usual bravado… Just him, William, worried sick for the woman he loved. And now, he couldn’t help but feeling naked in front of them. So he put on his best detached face, and waited for what Buffy had to say.


The Scoobies didn’t look anymore comfortable than Spike did. Too much emotions over such a short period of time. An eternity for Buffy, but too short for the ones who were looking for her and losing hope with every passing hour. Lack of sleep, worry, fear, relief; it all wore them down. And now, they were all standing in front of her, unsure of how to react. Was she in too much pain for hugs? Was it a bad time for chocolates and flowers?


Buffy rolled her eyes. “Geez guys, I’m not dead. Were they handing out the long faces at the door, or is it just the hospital food that has that effect?”


Xander smiled first and approached her to give her a quick kiss on the forehead. “Hey Buff. Glad to see you’re still very much yourself.”


“Yeah, sorry about that,” Willow said while waiting her turn to hug her friend “we were just worried sick about you. That would explain the long faces.”


“And if we’re a little gray,” Cordelia added, “it’s because that thing they serve here and call coffee is poison.”


Buffy gave Cordelia a half smile.


Anya wave awkwardly at Buffy. "Hey Buffy. You look..." she swallowed, obviously trying hard not to be her usual blunt self.


"It's ok Anya, you can say it. I look like shit."


"No, no! You look good. Blue... is a good color for you."


Xander groaned.


Anya gave him a look. "What? She's the one who said that.."


Giles took a seat next to her bed, putting an end to Anya's rant before it got too far. “How are you feeling Buffy?”


“Well, you know how my life is right? Not much time to indulge in the luxury of self-pity. I asked you here because I need to share the little information that I have. Meaning pretty much nothing, but we still need to figure out what to do.” She stopped to catch her breath. Her broken ribs not allowing her to fill up her lungs completely, she was getting out of breath pretty fast.


“First, you need to know we might have a chance to win Faith over. Ok, I admit, the chances are pretty slim considering that it took about 30 hours of hearing me scream in pain for her to finally have mercy on me, but still… she did.”


“What do you mean by that exactly?”


“She gave me the key. Of course, she could have been more helpful: stake Angelus, untie me, get me to the nearest hospital. Giving me the key obviously wasn’t gonna save me, I couldn’t even stand on my own, more or less fight Angelus. But it’s a sign that maybe we can reach her. Oh, and she also told me the ritual will be tonight. That means I’m out of the fight.”


She smiled at Cordelia. “I guess they can’t fool you Cordy, huh?”


The brunette smiled back. “Nah. They can’t. And about what you said, I mean, about Faith… You’re right. Last night, a couple of hours before they found you, I had another vision. It wasn’t clear, but it confirmed what you just said. It will, somehow, depend on her choices. Oh… and you Spike.”


Spike, who was looking at his boots, raised his eyebrows to look questioningly at Cordelia, but Buffy spoke before he could ask questions.


“Yeah, that kinda brings me to this..”


He looked at her. “Will you take over for me?”


Everybody heard it, but the words were spoken only for him.


“It goes without saying pet.”


“Good.” She smiled and closed her eyes. “It should feel good to have some vacation for a change. I’ll try not to get used to it too much though.”


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A/N: Love it? Hate it? Review so I can find out how you feel about the story. But if you don't review... I love you anyway just for taking time to read my fic :D





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