[Reviews - 141]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Microsoft Word Chapter or Story | ePub eBook Chapter or Story | Printer Chapter or Story

Has been viewed 3294 times

- Text Size +




Over a month passed before Spike saw her again. Whenever he tried calling her, he hung up as soon as he heard her voice, partially because he just wanted to know she was okay. Otherwise, he realized that he didn’t know what to say to her- he knew she was stubborn, and breaking the Buffy shell wasn’t going to be accomplished with one phone call. He even drove past her house regularly, and whenever he saw her car in the driveway, he couldn’t bring himself to go to her door. He was lost without her and concerned about her.

‘But she’s young and doesn’t know what she wants yet,’ he thought. ‘Whereas I do, and I’m not going to give up until I know that it’s definitely never going to happen between us.’

When he went to the Bronze one night to get a drink, he was somewhat surprised to see Buffy there, walking around with a brunette guy and laughing at something he had said.

‘Of course, she’s with a guy that’s close to her age,’ Spike thought, sitting on a stool and trying to keep himself from approaching her. ‘No one else should be privileged with hearing her laugh, just me.’ He sighed and ordered a beer. ‘But she doesn’t want you anymore, Spike.’ He grabbed the beer bottle the bartender offered him and returned to watching her and the boy, softly smiling when he saw Willow by her side. ‘At least Red is still around- she was always a nice girl.’ He took a drink of his beer. ‘What does the whelp have that I don’t? Honestly, I’m more fetching than he is, I’ve got a good job, I… I’m actually jealous over some guy that doesn’t look old enough to shave.’ He looked down, into the bottle. ‘God, I’ve really lost her, haven’t I?’

* * *

Buffy felt someone’s eyes on her and turned to look across the club, seeing Spike at the bar. She tensed up and took a deep breath.

“You alright, Buff?” Xander asked, looking at her. “You seem kind of pale suddenly.” She looked at him and managed a weak smile.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she answered. “I think I’m going to head out.”

“What? The night is young,” Xander said, looking at his watch. “A lot younger than us.” She smiled and shrugged.

“I’m tired,” Buffy said, faking a yawn. “Didn’t sleep well last night.”

‘Or any night over the last few weeks,’ she thought.

“Do you want us to take you home?” Willow asked, worried.

“No, I’ll be fine,” Buffy said, waving it off. “You two go and party like it’s 1999.”

“You know, I didn’t actually ‘party’ in 1999,” Xander said, frowning. “And to think, it was the end of one millennium, not to mention the fact most of the population thought we were going to die. Anyone else remember Y2K?”

“Have a good night, guys,” Buffy cut in, smiling at both of her friends before walking outside to her car and getting in. She took a deep breath as she put the key in the ignition and paused.

‘He looked good,’ she thought. ‘At least I know he’s okay. That’s all that matters- that he’s okay.’

* * *

“So, how are you feeling today?” Willow asked the next afternoon as she walked through Buffy’s front door.

“I’m fine,” she answered. “Got about four hours of sleep, which is an improvement from the night before it.”

“Why can’t you sleep well anymore?” Willow asked, sitting down on the couch. “You never had problems before, even after your mom died.”

“I kind of know why,” Buffy said quietly, sitting down beside her friend. “You remember Spike, right?”

“The hottie from the gallery?” Willow asked, smiling. “The bane of your existence?”

“The very one,” Buffy answered, smiling a little.

“What about him?” Willow asked. “Is he giving you nightmares or something?”

“Willow, something kind of happened between Spike and I,” Buffy said, looking down. Willow held back a surprised gasp as her eyes widened.

“What do you mean by ‘something kind of happened’?” she asked.

“Well, in a moment of extreme weakness, I kind of decided to…sleep with him,” Buffy mumbled, closing her eyes so she wouldn’t have to see Willow’s reaction.

“A moment of weakness that I’ve been expecting to hear about for a long time,” Willow said, smirking, and Buffy opened her eyes, surprised. “Oh, come on- I’m not blind, Buffy. I’ve seen the way he looks at you and vice versa. I’m just surprised it took you so long to go for it.”

“Wait- you’re not disappointed? Or shocked?” Buffy asked, still stunned.

“What? No,” Willow replied. “So, what are the details? Was it romantic? Was he good?”

“Willow!” Buffy replied, blushing and looking down. “He was very good, stress on the ‘very’.”

“Good, you deserve a stallion,” Willow said, grinning. Buffy looked at her friend.

“Will you stop it? I’m going to be redder than your hair if you keep this up,” she said, crossing her arms.

“So, when did it happen?” Willow asked, leaning back against a pillow.

“The night of the funeral,” Buffy answered.

“And you’re just telling me this now?” Willow asked, her eyes wide.

“I didn’t know how you’d react,” Buffy said. “I thought you’d be upset with me.”

“Of course not,” Willow said. “You know I’m support-girl.” Buffy smiled softly. “So what’s the deal then? Why aren’t you in the arms of Mr. Salty Goodness right now?”

“Because I told him that I couldn’t handle it,” Buffy replied quietly. “I told him I needed to be on my own.”

“And how much of that was true?” her friend asked, studying her.

“About 20%,” Buffy answered. “After Lindsey, I guess I just needed to get away from guys for a while.”

“And reasonably so,” Willow said. “That’d be traumatic for anyone to face, especially a girl who lost her mother a short time before the abuse kicked in.”

“He was at the Bronze last night,” Buffy said. “That’s why I bailed so quickly.”

“And you didn’t want to see him?” Willow asked, and Buffy shook her head. “Things ended that badly?”

“I guess, yeah,” Buffy said, looking down. “I really screwed it up. This is all my fault.” She bit back tears. “Why did I push him away?”

“Love’s a funny thing,” Willow said, putting her hand on Buffy’s. Buffy looked up, surprised.

“This…you think that I… no, I can’t,” Buffy said quickly, standing up and pacing around the room.

“Why not?” Willow asked. “He’s a good man, Buffy. Loving him is one of the best choices you could ever make.” Buffy looked at Willow before taking a deep breath.

“I don’t think I can, Willow,” she said, tearing up. “It’s just not right.”

“You can’t control who you love,” Willow said, shrugging. “That’s not the way it works a lot of the time.”

“I…just need more time,” Buffy replied, sighing.

* * *

Buffy walked into the gallery a few days later and saw Fred walking around. The brunette looked at her and instantly smiled before quickly walking to the blonde and hugging her.

“Hi, Fred,” Buffy said, smiling. “How’s it going?”

“Fine,” Fred answered, surprised to see her. “What brings you in? I thought you said you’d be staying away from here.” Buffy looked down. “Not that I want you to stay away…or leave…don’t mind me- I like to babble. How are you doing?”

“I’m okay,” Buffy answered. “How’s the gallery doing?”

“Pretty well,” Fred said, motioning around. “We’ve been getting in new shipments a lot lately, so Spike and I’ve been running behind a bit, but everything’s going fairly well right now.”

“It’s just you two working?” Buffy asked quietly, and Fred nodded. “I didn’t know.”

“We’re chugging along, though,” Fred said, shrugging.

“Well, if you ever need help, you know where I am,” Buffy said, looking at the older woman. “Anything I can do to keep the gallery up and running is good.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Fred replied. “Not when you’re starting school soon.”

“I’ve got almost a month off still,” Buffy said. “I think I can manage it for a while.”

“Well, great, then,” Fred said, smiling. “So, what compelled you to visit today?”

“I was wondering if Spike was around, actually,” Buffy said, putting her hands in her shorts’ pockets.

“He’s in the back room,” Fred answered. “Have you two talked since…” Buffy shook her head. “Oh.”

“I think it’s time I at least say hi or something,” Buffy said. “It’s been a long time.”

“He was really sad, Buffy,” Fred said. “I don’t think I’ve seen Spike that down before.” Buffy looked down. “I just hope you two can work something out. I hate seeing my friends upset.” Buffy nodded and headed towards the storage room. “And, Buffy?” She turned around. “I’m happy you’re here.” Buffy smiled and kept walking, taking a deep breath before she entered the back room.

Spike turned when he heard the door open and tensed up when he saw Buffy standing there.

“Hi,” she said quietly, looking at him anxiously.







A/N Alright, yes, I know I’m evil for leaving it end here, but I’ll be posting the next chapter tomorrow- I promise! I would really like to thank everyone who voted for me this week for Best Spuffy Fic- I actually cried when I saw that I won. I’ve never won something like this for a solo fic, so it really means a lot. I’m happy people seem to be enjoying this story so much, and I hope you all like the rest!:)

Sincerely,
Allison





You must login (register) to review.