Spike lay in his crypt, starring at the blank ceiling. He couldn't get her out of his mind. He tried to think of other things but every time he thought of something, she would creep in and intervene with the thought.
Spike's eyes flared open. He sat up, eyes wide, and mouth open. Gasping for air, he looked around the dark room. Looking down at the red comforter, Spike shook his head and chuckled to himself. Was he ever going to get over her? Before she came back, he had counted every day he had spent without her and he would have continued to do so for the rest of his vampire life.
Throwing the covers off him, Spike slowly walked up and out of the dingy crypt. The sun had gone down an hour before and the night sky was already a mixture of its dark blue and royal purple. Spike looked out into the cemetery. There he saw her, a stake in hand. Her golden hair swayed to the movement of her graceful yet swift body as she rid the Hell mouth of its vampires. Finally, the last vampire turned into dust, leaving Buffy and Spike alone.
As if the sky was mourning the loss of it's nighttime creatures, it began to rain. The slayer stood, looking at the sky. She raised her arms as if to welcome the rain's touch. She twirled around; smiling up at the rain cloud covered sky. Spike had his lips curled into a smile as he watched Buffy. "Slayer. You're going to catch your death if you stand out here in the rain, twirling around." Buffy stopped and looked at him.
"Well, I'm sure you will too. After all, you're outside in the rain with no shirt on."
"You are quiet the pest aren't you luv? Besides, I'm already dead," Spike replied, a small smiled on his pale face.
"Please don't call me that. Or any of your other pet names for a matter of fact."
"Don't know why you're getting all upset. Never bothered you before. Besides, where's the fun in it all?" Spike said, a little peeved.
"Fun! When did life become fun? Fun. Fun would have been me staying in heaven. Fun would have been me not coming back! Fun would have been leaving me where I was!"
"Get over it. Life isn't all bloody peaches 'n' cream." Spike turned around and began to walk back to his crypt, but Buffy wasn't finished with him yet.
"You don't know anything about life! How could you? You're dead! You don't know shit about life." Spike stopped and whipped around at hearing the last statement.
"I don't know shit about life? Listen pet, I know I a lot about life. More then you'll ever know! You seem to forget that I was alive once. God, you think your life is bad. Try being laughed at every time you walk into a bloody room! That's what happed to me most of my life. But that was my actual one. You know. Before that mystery man of yours, Angel turned me into what I am now! I've been around longer then you have Buffy. I've seen starvation, wars, destruction, and killing. I've seen more then you could ever imagine. If I don't know what life is then why don't you go sod off." Buffy stood still and looked into his eyes. Giving into desire, she pulled him down to her height and kissed him. Letting go, she turned and walked away - disappearing into the cold, wet night.
Spike felt his knees go weak and soon found himself on the wet ground, his back against the crypt that was his excuse of a home. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back what he never wanted to show to the world. He was drowning in her and he couldn't take it anymore. "Why can't you let me rest in peace," he said to the night. Then realizing what he had said, Spike lifted his head. "Oh this is bloody great. I can't take the damn singing again." Standing up, Spike went inside to dry off.
When Buffy arrived home that night, she found Dawn awake in the living room watching TV "Why are you still awake? You should be in bed!" Buffy said taking off her coat.
"It's the weekend! Plus, it's summer. I'm supposed to stay up late!" Dawn stated.
"Oh yea. Sorry, you know. Slaying stress," Buffy said.
"You kissed Spike again, didn't you?" Buffy didn't need to answer because at that moment, there was a knock on the door. Getting up, Dawn answered the door as Buffy went into the kitchen. Opening the door, Dawn's eyes widened when she saw who it was.
"Where's your sister?" he said. He proceeded inside and walked towards the sound of someone humming. When he emerged into the kitchen, Buffy's eyes locked with his.
"Why are you here?" Buffy asked him. He moved swiftly across the room, closing the distance between them. He reached her and pulled her into his arms. "I wish you wouldn't do this."
"What?" he said softly, his brown eyes shinning.
"This!" Buffy said as she gestured to his arms that were wrapped around her tightly.
"Well you're not making an effort to get away Slayer."
"Spike, no. I can't," Buffy said, placing her hands on his own.
"Can't or won't?"
"I can't. I'm sorry Spike, William."
"I love you, you know. I love you. You're all I bloody think about. Dream about. You're in my gut. . . my throat. . . I'm drowning in you Summers. I'm drowning in you." Buffy looked at him, sorrow in her eyes. "I cant get you out of my mind and I think I'm going to go bloody mad if we're not together. Buffy, please. I love you. Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Buffy felt him let go of her. Spike looked at her, his head slightly cocked to the side, waiting for an answer.
"Spike. I'm the slayer. You're a vampire. It could never happen."
"Oh, but it can happen when it's bloody Angel!? If I were Angel would you go out with me? If I have my soul back, will you go out with me?" Spike said. Buffy was taken back by the outburst.
"That was really harsh."
"Really? I thought you'd be use to it. God Buffy. What do you want?"
"I want to go back to where I was."
"And I want to be with you. Looks like a no win situation. But, I just want to know one thing. Do you love me?" Buffy sighed at this. She looked at him and paused of a moment.
"No. I'm sorry. I don't." And with that, she shattered into a thousand pieces, broken on the floor.
Spike sat up in his bed, sweat glazed his forehead. He looked around the room. Pictures of Buffy were on the wall. The calendar, which he had used to count the days, had been thrown onto the side table and clothes were on the floor in piles. Spike pulled on a shirt that was lying on the floor. Grabbing his coat, he ran out into the empty cemetery. There she stood, stake in hand. After killing the last vampire, it began to rain. Spike looked at her in awe as she began to twirl. "Bloody hell no!" he exclaimed. Buffy stopped and turned to find Spike crouching down, holding his head.
"Spike? What's wrong? Are you ok?" Buffy said in a worried voice as she ran up to him. Spike looked at her and shook his head.
"I swear. I'm drowning in you Summers."
THE END!
