Chapter 30: ‘She Isn’t Miss Perfect’
Buffy hurried through the front door of her house, already late to meet Will at Clem’s bar. They were going to meet there, for some weird reason, and then drive up to Santa Barbara to stay the night in some obscure hotel. When she had called her Mother last night from Will’s, Buffy had been cryptic about the reason for her trip up north.
“I need to talk to you Mom,” she explained, briefly, “you know, about what we discussed before. I think we need to suss this out in person.”
Of course Joyce wanted to see her daughter, she was always complaining about how little they got together and she missed that. It was almost 10:00 AM by the time Buffy pulled into the parking lot of Clems bar.
She saw the DeSoto, parked outside the building and checked quickly to see if Will was inside, he wasn’t. A little confused, she entered the building only to find Clem behind the bar and Will sitting on one of the stools.
‘Good thing I’m somewhat comfortable about coming in here,’ she mused as she smiled and waved at Will from the door. He came over to her, planting a chaste kiss on her cheek, then led her back to the bar. There were only a couple of patrons inside, naturally, it was still early in the day and Buffy felt okay about sitting down.
“Be right back. Give my girl some coffee, mate,” Will smiled, squeezing her shoulder lovingly and leaving her alone with the dark haired man behind the bar.
“Hi,” he grinned at her. “Hi, Clem,” she responded, taking the coffee eagerly.
“So,” Buffy began, sipping her coffee and watching the stocky man go about his work, “how’s Sophie?”
Clem turned around, a pleasantly surprised look on his face.
“Did you think I didn’t remember you?” she asked, slyly, giggling.
He pulled a stool on his side of the bar over and sat down on it, sliding his coffee cup over to where they sat.
“Guess not, Buffy,” he smiled, “we didn’t exactly travel in the same circles after all.”
Buffy nodded, “yeah, we didn’t, but I remember Sophie, very well. She was in a couple of my classes and I really liked her. What happened to her?”
He chuckled, “I married her. We’ve got a two-year-old boy and another baby on the way.”
She smiled warmly, “I’m glad for both of you.” Buffy hesitated a minute then asked, “how is it you know William?”
Clem looked around the bar, apparently searching for Will. When he didn’t see any sign of him, he turned his attention back to Buffy.
“Well, that’s a long story,” he responded, “one I think Spike should tell you, not me.”
She nodded again, then asked, “I suppose you know I’m married, right?”
He blushed profusely, “yup, and I know who to, but don’t worry, Buffy,” he assured her, “my loyalty is to my friend Spike, okay?”
Buffy gave him a soft smile, “okay, Clem.” Will chose that moment to come out of the back of the bar and plopped down next to Buffy.
“How bout some breakfast, luv,” he smiled at her, “the ‘chef’ in the back makes great omelettes.”
Buffy gave him a quizzical look, “okay,” she sighed, “that’s it. What’s going on here?” Clem laughed, Will blushed and Buffy got frustrated. “Well,” her lover finally stammered, “I kind of own some of this place.”
On the way up to Santa Barbara, Buffy grilled Will about the bar and a lot of things.
“So,” she started, “how long have you been in business?”
Will blushed again, “a while,” he responded.
“Hmmm,” she murmered, reaching over and running her hand up his thigh, “just what other legitimate business ventures are you into, Spike?” she grinned.
He chuckled, “most of my ‘business ventures’ are legitimate, Princess. Sorry to dissapoint you.”
‘I wonder,’ she thought. They pulled into into the parking lot of the Montecito Inn, in Santa Barbara. Buffy still felt a little odd about this kind of thing, it kind of made her relationship with Will feel less then stellar, but she went along with it. For some reason, she just felt compelled to.
“You sure you don’t want me to go with you, pet?” he asked, joining her on the balcony of the room he’d rented.
“No, Will, really. I’ll be fine. It’s going to be enough of a shock for my Mom to realize her daughter isn’t ‘Miss perfect’ if you go…..”
She hadn’t been to her Mom’s Santa Barbara house in ages, but had no problem in finding the spacious ranch style building. Buffy had borrowed Will’s old DeSoto to go see her Mom and get some things straightened out, a few things anyway. Even though she had grown a little distant from her Mom, since she’d married Angel that is, her opinion and emotional support was still very important to Buffy.
Spike had stayed at the Inn; Buffy left him sitting on the couch, watching Passions on the cable stations of the telly, as he called it.
Taking a deep breath, Buffy knocked on her Mother’s front door, feeling ‘funny’ that she should be so nervous about being there.
“Buffy!” Joyce Summers squealed, pulling her only child into a warm embrace. “You look great, honey,” her mom gushed, eyeing her up and down.
“You too, Mom,” Buffy echoed; her mom did look great and she was glad. If anyone deserved happiness, it was Joyce Summers.
“Come on,” Joyce pulled her through the house and onto the patio in back. “I’ve got some lunch out and some mirmosa poured. Everything we need for a nice long chat together!”
Buffy smiled and sat down on a recently purchased whicker chair on her Mom’s patio. “Good, because we have a whole bunch to talk about, Mom,” she sighed. They sat together on the patio, enjoying the gorgeous day, eating California Cuisine and drinking mirmosas, when finally Buffy decided to begin their ‘chat’ in earnest.
“Mom,” she began carefully, setting down her glass on the little glass and whicker table between them, “there’s something I need to tell you. Something I’m not sure you’ll like, and I’m not sure I’m too proud of, but, I need to tell you, now.”
Joyce took a sip of her own mirmosa and watched her daughter over the rim of her glass, “there’s another man, right?” she asked suddenly.
Buffy sat up, a bit stunned by her Mother’s question, but she nodded, averting her green eyes from her Mom’s honest blue ones.
“Yeah, there is, Mom, but it’s not just that, there’s more. I caught Angel with another woman a few months ago, right in his office,” she snorted.
“I can’t say I’m shocked by that one, honey,” Joyce mumbled, causing Buffy to stare at her, even more surprised. “Angel is and always has been just like his father, honey,” her Mother sighed, “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. So,” she continued, sipping her mirmosa, “this other man, does he love you?”
‘Geez, Mom, get right to the point much,’ Buffy thought with a smile.
‘Yes, Mom, he loves me so bloody much!” Joyce hesitated, a funny expression on her face, “well, then, I guess my next question would have to be, do you love him?”
“I can’t say for sure,” Buffy answered honestly, “I know I care for him, a lot. He’s been like a rock for me, Mom, even if the whole affair started like a bloody Hollywood horror story.”
Joyce eyed her daughter, seemingly sizing her up before her next question. “Do I dare ask who this ‘other man’ is?”
Buffy stood up, paced around for a while then stood in front of her mother. “Do you really want to?”
With a sorrowful laugh, Joyce took her daughter’s hand. “No, I don’t want to, honey,” she responded, “in fact, I’m pretty sure I don’t have to. It’s William Giles, isn’t it?”
Buffy felt like she was going to faint, “how’d you know?” she stammered, barely able to breathe.
“Well, first off,” Joyce began, “you’ve used the term ‘bloody’ at least twice in the last five minutes and unless you’ve gotten some new British friends….” Her mother, squeezed Buffy’s hand warmly.
“Secondly, I’m not blind, I saw that one-of-a-kind car of his when you pulled up front.”
Here, Buffy giggled.
“Third, William is the only man I know of that is strong enough, or loves you enough to stick by you, no matter what. Even if it means putting up with your being married to that pompous ass Angel."
“Do you hate me, Mama,” Buffy asked, timidly, sitting on her mother’s lap and curling up into the security there.
“No, I don’t hate you, I love you more then anything, Buffy. I just wish….”
Buffy looked up into her mother’s blue eyes, “wish what?”she asked, cuddling her head into Joyce’s chest.
“I just wish you were happy, honey. As for William, I’ve known about ‘that’ for years, and it doesn’t shock me, just makes me sad a little.”
Daughter looked up again at mother, another ‘say what’ expression on her face.
Joyce chuckled warmly, tightening her arms about Buffy, “I’ve watched you and William for years. The way you two have danced around each other, the way you’ve ignored his feelings for you. In fact, two days after your wedding day, he showed up at the old house on Revello Drive. God, but he was drunk, drunker then anyone I’ve ever seen.”
“Tell me more,” Buffy ordered softly, snuggling deeper into her mother’s lap.
“Well,” Joyce murmered, stroking her daughter’s blond head, “he was drunk, miserable and yes, pretty angry. I don’t know if he was still drunk from the night before, or drunk from that very morning, but he was smashed, either way. He stumbled into the front room after I opened the door, ranting on about what a bloody idiot Angel was, how he’d ruin your life, and so on. I felt so sorry for him, I fixed him hot chocolate, with those little marshmellows you love and made him sleep it off on the couch.”
“When he woke up, I tried to open his eyes to some harsh truths, like how he should go back to England, help Anne and Drusilla with little Guinevere,” here Buffy flinched, “but he still insisted he was needed here. By you.” Buffy couldn’t believe it, Will had been there, all the time, just like he’d told her, waiting, watching her from the shadows.
“Finally,” Joyce continued, “I seemed to have suceeded in calming him down, temporarily and noticed he was looking at our painting ‘Christina’s World’ the one you loved so much. I couldn’t help it, I insisted that he take the painting with him, when he finally sobered up enough to leave, and keep it for himself. It seemed to comfort him somehow and I couldn’t stand to see his heart breaking, it made me so sad.”
By the time Joyce had finished, Buffy was crying softly against her chest, clutching onto her Mother’s body like a small, desperate child.
“I screwed up, Mama,” she sobbed rocking in her Mother’s arms, “I could have been contented with a simple, decent life. With a man I could have respected, loved and built a good life with, I just fucked everything up and I’m not sure if it’s fixable.”
“Buffy!” Joyce tsked and cringed at her daughter’s use of the ‘f’ word but then, “everything is fixable, honey,” she advised. “Leave Angel if you have to, do you have any other choice?”
Buffy wiped the tears from her face, “it’s not that simple, Mom,” she sniffed, “Angel isn’t going to let me go without a fight, or something worse.”
Joyce tensed up, but kept stroking her daughter’s hair, “oh,” she whsipered, “I see.”
They sat in silence for a few moments then Buffy finally murmered, “I sold out my happiness and freedom for a ‘name,’ a new car every year and a life’s membership to the Sunnydale Country Club.”
Joyce continued to rock her daughter in her arms, stroking her head tenderly, “oh Buffy,” she sighed in sympathy.
Buffy drove back to the Montecito Inn, slowly, contemplating everything she and her Mother had discussed earlier. As much as she tried to pay attention to her driving, her mind wondered back to something Joyce had said, just before Buffy had left to go back to William.
"What’s the plan?” her Mother had asked.
“Plan?” Buffy wondered aloud. “This is William Giles, Buffy, there has to be a plan to free you from Angel Even if it’s a bad one.”
Apparently, Buffy’s Mother had recognized the kind of man Angel truly was, even before she had. A real monster. Sighing, Buffy flipped on the DeSoto’s radio, wondering if it even worked anymore. It did. William had programmed every button to KROQ, an LA based alternative radio station.
“Figures,” Buffy giggled, happy to hear some music that Will loved so. Her ears perked up when she heard the first strains of tune playing:
(okay, retro plot line here! The Cure’s Lovesong)
‘Whenever I’m alone with you, you make me feel like
I am home again. Whenever I’m alone with you you make
Me feel like I am whole again…..’
Suddenly, Buffy gunned the motor and sped off to get back to the Inn as fast as she could.
“Will!” she called as she hurried into the room, searching for him, frantically.
“Out here, Princess,” he greeted from the little balcony, waving at her. He was smoking a cigarette, dressed only in his regulation black levis. She tossed her purse on the couch and scurried out to join him.
“I’ve got something to tell you,” she panted breathlessly, “it’s important, but I can’t tell you now. It’s gotta’ be just perfect when I do. Maybe at our pond, but somewhere near home, not here in this hotel room, okay?”
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him, “okay, baby,” he murmered, “you tell me when your ready.”
Buffy snuggled into him, reluctant to let loose, but she did. “Come on,” she purred, taking him by the hand, “we’ve got some ‘things’ to discuss in the bedroom.”
A/N: Short chapter for me! Nothing too angstsy this time, maybe just a little. I’m afraid that the next chapters are going to be full of angst for true Spuffy lovers, so…..
In the mean time, thanks for reading and please review if you like. Luv, Spuf
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you for reading this and for reviews.
I've decided to continue to post the story here.
I've decided to continue to post the story here.