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Thank you for reading and reviews.
Luv, Spuf
Chapter 32: ‘Winning’


Summary: The note sender is revealed as he and Buffy confront each other!


‘WHORE’!

The word glared at Buffy like an angry neon sign, causing her to feel faint.

“What the hell?” she finally was able to mumble, turning the white envelope in her hand over to check the addresses. That’s when she remembered, the letter had been hand delivered, no addresses, no stamp.

Someone had taken the trouble to drop this thing into the Gallery mailbox themselves, but who? Buffy sat down and just stared at the innocent lined paper, unaware that Olivia had rejoined her in the office.

“Buffy?” her boss’s melodic voice broke her trance, “is everything all right?”

She looked up at Olivia, quickly trying to hide the trepidation in her green eyes, “I, uhm, I’m fine, Olivia.”

The letter and evelope were quickly deposited in the little trash can by her desk and Olivia nodded slowly, “okay, Buffy. It’s just, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

With a shake of her blond head, Buffy assured Olivia, again, that she was fine, just a little tired.

“Maybe you should go home, get some rest?” Olivia suggested, but Buffy was adamant about ‘that’ and assured her, she was fine, wanted to stay around awhile.

“Well, alright,” Olivia stammered, “if you’re sure. I’m going to run by home for a while, then I’ll be back to finish up a few things. Just finish going through the mail, you can work on the cataloging tomorrow after I’m gone to Chicago. I wouldn’t leave right now, but my husband is in charge of dinner tonight, some kind of roast, he’s hopeless and if I don’t go home….” She smiled at Buffy and rolled her eyes.

“Of course, Olivia,” Buffy smiled weakly, willing the color in her face to come back, “I’ll be fine. Go on, save the roast.”

This brought a laugh from them both and Olivia grabbed her purse and left the Gallery. As soon as Buffy heard the door close and saw the exit door light flash, she pulled the little note out of the trash can.

“Who?” she wondered nervously.

“Angel?” she whispered, truly frightened. “No,” she assured herself, “too cryptic for my husband, he’s not that creative. Then who?” she asked the empty room, again, a sick, sinking feeling in the pit of her tummy.


Buffy pulled her cell phone out of her purse and debated calling Will, right this minute, then hesitated.

“What’s Will going to be able to do?” she asked herself. “He’ll just go ballistic and start kicking random ass around Sunnydale, because someone had the nerve to call me a whore!”

This actually brought a small smile to her face, “how can I be a whore? We love each other.”

There, she’d said it out loud, once and for all, she loved Will, loved him with all her heart and soul. Now she just needed to tell him to his face, but first, there was this little problem to work out.

Her cell phone began to ring in her hand and she answered it eagerly, hoping it was Will calling her and ready to tell him everything, consequences be damned.

Imagine her surprise when Xander Harris responded to her ‘hello.’

“Xander?” she gasped, “what are you doing, calling me here and now?”

He was silent, “Xander?” she repeated.

“Figured it was the perfect time, Buffy,” he finally spoke, but his tone was off, not warm and friendly at all. “No one’s there but you, right? I mean your boss left, Gallery’s closed for the day, heck even the cleaning crew don’t show up today. This is about as good as time as any for us to ‘talk’ isn’t it?”

Buffy suddenly felt faint again but she pulled herself together and sat up in the chair, “no, Xander, it’s not a good time to talk. Not now, not ever, we’ve talked before, there’s nothing to talk about.”

Again, Xander was silent on the other end then, “oh, but I think it’s the best time to talk, Buff. I know you got my special delivery and I know that you’re more then curious as to why I sent it.”

She didn’t say anything for moment, trying to collect her thoughts, think up the right response to him.

“Xander, I don’t know what you’re playing at, or why, but if this is some kind of game, or threat or whatever, I think you should be aware that….”

Xander interrupted her with a wicked laugh, “don’t even think about threatening ‘me’ Buffy, especially with dropping your fuck buddy’s name. And in case you’re even considering calling that bleached freak you’ve been screwing, don’t bother. I get even a twinge of a sense that Spike is coming after me, or any sense of danger to my body….I’ll have another letter sent out, this time to Angel.”

“Where are you?” she finally asked him, afraid she already knew the answer.

“Right outside your little Gallery, Beautiful. Now, just open the locked back door, quickly, and let me in. We’ll have our heart-to-heart in your office, okay?”

‘God, he sounds so cold, so evil,’ Buffy shuddered violently, feeling ill again.

“You stay as far away from me as possible,” Buffy hissed in warning.


“Oh, don’t worry, bitch,” Xander hissed back, “I wouldn’t touch you now with a ten foot pole. Not after you’ve fucked that punk.”

With a flinch, Buffy did as he told her and unlocked the back door, electronically.


He sauntered through Buffy’s office door, like pompous royalty, ‘finally made it, huh, Xand,’ she thought ruefully, ‘you’re real important now, hold all the cards, right?’

Buffy stood up straight, her arms crossed over her chest, head held high.

“That’s close enough,” she informed him cooly when he’d just stepped inside. She tried to read his chocolate brown eyes from this distance, but they were closed to her, closed and secretive.

“Okay, Xander,” Buffy began with the offense mode, “what the hell is this about?”

Xander just stared at her through narrowed eyes, a look that was not particularly attractive on him, she thought.

“First let me ask you something, Buff?” he countered with a smirk, “when did this ‘thing’ with Spike start? Right after us? Before? Did you break it off with me for him? What?”

Averting her eyes from his, she set down in her chair and drummed her fingers against the desk, nervously, “after,” she lied easily.

“Did you leave me for him?” She couldn’t speak, just nodded her head slightly.

“Why?” he growled, “does Spike have a bigger dick then me, what?”

Buffy fought back the urge to quip, ‘well, actually, yes he does, thank you.’ Instead she just remained mute, staring at her little desk calendar and trying not to panic too much.

“I didn’t leave you, Xander,” she mumbled, still not looking at him, “there was no ‘you and me’ to leave or break off. If you thought it was more then just a casual affair, I’m sorry, it wasn’t. I think you better be aware of something. I caught Angel with another woman, someone we both know; should I tell you who it is?”

Buffy relished the mix of puzzlement and pained look on her now adverary’s face, “I could care less who your precious Angel is fucking around with, Buffy. I only care about who you’re doing these days.”

She stood up and walked around to the front of her desk, sitting on the edge of the wooden frame, “why?” she asked simply.

He shrugged, “let’s just say I’m ‘interested’ for personal reasons.”

Nodding slowly, to bide some time, Buffy pondered her next question. “Okay,” she started, “you wouldn’t come within twenty feet of me because I’m having an affair with Will.”

Xander smirked, “Will? How cute, nicknames. What does he call you? His bitch?”

Buffy tensed up and resisted the urge to knock the shit out of the smirking hulk in front of her.

“Like I said,” she continued through gritted teeth, “you don’t want me anymore, thank God! I get that. So, what’s this about?”

Xander took a step closer to Buffy, who backed hopped off her desk and went back around to her chair.

“Like I said,” she hissed, her own green eyes narrowed into slits, “don’t come any closer to me.”

He seemed to pay attention this time and stopped walking closer to the desk, “okay,” he sighed, “I won’t come nearer. And in answer to your question, ‘this’ is about winning. My winning for once.”

Buffy tilted her head to one side, she just knew she looked like a confused idiot, “what winning, Xander? Winning what?”

The man before her bore little resemblence to the boy she first met in grade school, nothing like the troubled teen she adored in high school and certainly nothing like the man she’d slept with out of revenge just months before this.

“Why did you sleep with me?” he asked suddenly, his eyes bore the same pained look that he had when Buffy had told him they were over. She couldn’t answer that one, she had no quip, smart remark or logical excuse, she just shrugged.

“Was it because of Angel and this woman?” he answered his own question with another one. Buffy nodded, deciding to opt for the truth, this once anyway.

“So,” she hesitated then went ahead and asked boldly, “this is about winning for you? And just what do you win in this Xander?”

He looked down for a minute then responded, “I win justice Buffy, which is better then nothing, I guess.”

Buffy was totally at a loss now, “huh?” she gasped, “what justice?”

Xander looked around and found a chair sitting close by the door, pulling it over to him, he sat down and crossed his legs, almost casually.

“You see, Buffster,” he replied evenly, using the endearment he’d called her in school, “I am a big loser, we all get that. No, don’t try to shake your head and deny it, we all know what a big laughable loser Xander Harris is. Well, then, I got you, finally, after years of pining away for you, worshipping you from afar, all that shit. Anyway, you seduce me, come on now, sweetheart, you know ‘you’ did.”

She had to cop to that, at least internally, she had seduced him, no matter how willing he was to be seduced.

“I had Anya, left her for Willow who left me for Tara. Then you come along, flash those big green eyes at me, beg me to fuck you with them and I fall into your little web of whatever the hell it was. Although, I’m guessing revenge would pretty much describe it, anyway, you dump me. All your ‘I love Angel, we need to work it out, he’s dangerous crap. I really believed it Buffy.”

Buffy was ashamed of herself, ashamed and so much more, however, it didn’t give Xander the right to come in here and spout off about winning, losing and revenge, he had no idea.

“Move this along,” Buffy muttered, hopefully cruelly, “I’m meeting Will in an hour.”

Xander stood up from the chair, “don’t think so, Buffy. You won’t be meeting your precious Will anymore, at least not to fuck him. The next time you meet him, well, it’s gonna’ be your last time.”

She stared at him, shocked, “what are you saying Xander? You’re going to stop me from being with the man I…..”

He began to laugh, “oh, let me guess, you love him, right? You two love each other? That’s just adorable, Buffy, really.”

Buffy didn’t respond, she hadn’t even told Will she loved him, how could she tell Xander or anyone else that first.

“I won’t stop seeing him,” Buffy stated stubbornly, her little chin jutting out with defiance. “I don’t have to, not for you or anyone else.”

Xander finally took the initiative to move closer to her, closing in on her desk and leaning onto it with clenched fists, “you’ll stop seeing him, Buffy. If you don’t I’ll personnally go to Angel and tell him everything about you and Spike. I can just see the expression on his stupid face. Wonder how long it’ll take him to beat the shit out of you and have a hit put out on him? What do you think, an hour, two? You and Spikey aren’t the only ones who ‘know’ your husband, Buffy. He’s pretty well known in some circles and not for his great hair style and good natured personality.”

Buffy sunk back down into her chair, struck by the fear that hearing the truth can bring. Xander smiled at her evilly, “still not gonna’ stop seeing him?” he asked smugly.

“What are you, Xander? Angel’s newest ‘butt monkey’ or something? What if I tell him about you and me? You know, in my marital bed? Think he’s going to just blow that one off?”

He seemed to ponder this for a minute then retorted, “and you think he’s gonna’ believe you? A lying whore who’s screwing a punk ass who’s little better then a street thug?”

Buffy swung her arm around to slap Xander, but he caught her arm with his huge hand, “Will’s a better man then you’ll ever be, Xander,” she hissed, “and just for the record, do you think you were the only one I ‘fucked’ for revenge? Think again.”

She returned his smug look, pulled her arm out of his hand and sashayed back around the desk. “Besides,” she gave him a parting shot, “Will and I are past fearing Angel Travers, we’ll do anything to be happy, so fuck off and go crawl back under your rock!” ‘There,’ she crowed to herself, ‘stick that in your pipe and smoke it, asshole!’

“Well, that’s real Romeo and Juliet of Captain Peroxide and you, Buff, but I think you’re forgetting a few details here.”

Buffy flinched despite herself, “what details,” she asked, her voice tense and harsh.

“It’s not really just about you and lover boy, is it? I mean, think about the other planets in your Spuffy (had to throw that in there!) Universe. What about Joyce? You think Angel’s gonna’ just let you walk off with Spike Giles, knowing that your Mommy dearest would just ‘love’ that! I mean, she’s always been under the Gile’s spell, hasn’t she? Wonder what mischief hubby could cook up for her? Then there’s Anne Gile’s, oh and deranged Drusilla, the walking loony toon. How’s that kid of hers anyway, you know, Guinevere? Hey isn’t Ethan Rayne due to get out of prison soon? Bet he can’t wait to go lay claim to his ‘love child,.’ Especially from a nut job like Drusilla Giles. Bet Angel could really help a guy out in a custody battle, even if the object of battle is over in England? Do you think Angel has any friends in England, Buff? Any powerful contacts?”

She sat down heavily in her chair, considering what Xander had said. “Xander?” she murmered sadly, “when the hell did you become such a prick?”

“I learned, Buffy,” he responded indifferently, “learned from the best. You, Angel, Willow and trash like Spike. I’m not going to be a loser anymore, now I get to win, even if I just get to see the rest of you miserable. I don’t have anything else but misery now, might as well get to be the big ‘winner’ for once.”

Buffy muddled over what Xander had threatened and blurted out, “I could just tell William. You know he’d track you down, kick your sorry ass all up and down Sunnydale. Then rip your stupid head off for good measure.”

She stared Xander down, hoping to scare him, at least a little. “If anything happens to me,” Xander growled through clenched teeth, “I have a friend who will send all kinds of little ‘love letters’ to Angel, immediately. You and Spike’s lives won’t be worth a plugged nickel. Your mother will be put through hell and oh, yeah, Spike’s precious little neice will end up with her father, now there’s a lovely thought. I mean, Ethan is such a model citizen and all, makes your honey look like a Saint, doesn’t he?”

Buffy knew defeat when she saw it and fought to keep the tears from spilling out of her eyes.

“I have to tell Will in person, Xander. Tell him we’re through. Just like I did you. Please, Xander, give me that much,” she hated the weakness in her voice.

“I’m feeling generous, Gorgeous,” he chuckled, “go tell Spikey you’re dumping him. In fact, I think it’s really poetic justice if you do. Just wish I could be there for it.”

With that, Xander turned and stomped out of the office, not even bothering to look at her. She sat for a good thirty minutes before picking up her cell phone and speed dialing Will’s number.

“Hi, baby,” came his cheerful voice.

“Hi,” she whispered, fighting back the tears, “I need to talk to you, Will. I need to see you.”

William sounded so happy to hear from her, he must have thought she wanted to just be with him, and she did, really she did, only this time was going to be their last time together.

“Tomorrow,” she murmered, “I’ll come, meet you at the park, okay?”

He readily agreed, but then asked her if everything was alright. “It’s fine, Will, honest. I just need to see you.”

Once she’d hung up the phone, Buffy broke down and sobbed, her heart breaking.


A/N: I’m rounding up a posse and going after Xander, who’s in, and who’s bringing the rope? Anyway, I hope people are still reading this story and please review, kay? Thanks, luv Spuf





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