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Chapter 20

Buffy and Spike walked into her house later that night to be greeted by Hank, who was in the living room.

"Where's Mom?" she wondered.

"She had to go into the gallery and took your sisters with her. I was hoping that we could talk."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well, that's not gonna happen." She started to head for the stairs, when Spike cleared his throat. She sighed and looked back at him, remembering that she would at least try talking to her father. She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at Hank. "Fine, what do you wanna talk about?"

He walked over to her. "I know you probably hate me right now, sweetheart. I know I haven't been a very good father. If I could go back and change things, I would, but I want you to know that I never once stopped loving you. I never stopped thinking about you or your sisters. You girls still mean everything to me and I really want to come back here for real. If your mother would accept me back, I promise that I will be a good father. I know I can never make up for walking out on you, but I would at least like to try."

Buffy felt the tears in her eyes and didn't care if he saw it. She wanted him to know just how much his leaving hurt her. "I think it's a little too late for that. You can't just come back into our lives like nothing has happened and expect for us to just forgive you. I'm not the same naïve little girl anymore. My sisters are still young and they don't really remember you, so they might be forgiving, but I won't be as easy. Mom might even forgive you because I know she still loves you and she's tired of being alone. I just don't know if I will ever be able to trust you again." The tears streamed down her face. She noticed Hank shed a few tears of his own.

Spike just stood there in silence. He knew Buffy had to get this off of her chest.

"You were my hero. I used to tell all of my friends how great my father was. Imagine how I felt when I came home from school one day to find my mother in tears telling me that you took off, leaving nothing but a note behind. Do you know that for all these years I blamed myself? I kept asking myself if it was my fault that you left. I believed that I was a terrible daughter and you left because of me. That maybe if I was better, you would have stayed. Mom kept telling me it wasn't my fault, but I never listened. Seven years later and I'm still blaming myself. I now realize that it wasn't my fault. I was only ten, I didn't know any better. You on the other hand knew exactly what you were doing. You knew that you had a wife and three kids, one that was only a year old and you still left. It wasn't my fault and it wasn't their fault. It was yours and I see that now. You left because you had issues. You couldn't deal with all the responsibility of being a father. You needed to get out there and find yourself, or whatever you wanna call it. Well, I hope you found what you were looking for because you lost one daughter in the process. I hope it was worth it," she finished.

Hank was openly crying now at her declaration. "I am so sorry, Buffy. I know that's not enough, but I would give anything to have my little girl back. I love you, honey. I plan on being here from now on, no matter what. I just hope that one day; you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Even though I know I don't deserve it."

She couldn’t control her tears anymore.

Hank walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her.

Buffy started to hug him back, until she realized what was happening. She pushed him away and wiped at her tears furiously. "No, you can't just do that. You can't just hug me and expect everything to be okay. I'm not that little girl anymore and no matter how hard you try, you can't get her back." She looked at Spike and saw the sad expression on his face. "I'm sorry, I tried. I just can't do this," she said, running out of the house.

Hank wasn't letting her go this time. He took a deep breath and ran after her.

Spike let out a sigh. He waited a few seconds, then took off after them.

Buffy ran into the street, with Hank close behind her.

Spike noticed that Buffy wasn't paying attention and saw the car that was headed for her. "Buffy, look out!"

Buffy stopped to stare at the car. She was in shock and couldn't seem to move.

Spike tried to get to her as fast as he could, but Hank got there first.

He suddenly grabbed Buffy and pushed her out of the way, only to get hit by the car himself. He smashed into the windshield and fell to the ground.

Buffy came out of her shock when she saw what happened and noticed that Hank wasn't moving. "Daddy!" she yelled and ran to his side. She had more tears falling down her face when she saw how badly he was hurt.

Spike finally reached her and didn't know what to do.

She looked up at him. "He's not moving, Spike."

The driver then came out of his car and headed over to them. "God, I'm sorry. I didn't see him."

Spike glared at the man. "Make yourself useful and call 911."

He nodded and ran back to his car, taking his cell phone out.

Spike turned his attention back to Buffy and wrapped his arms around her. "He'll be fine, love," he said, trying to comfort her.

Buffy continued to cry and rested her head against her father's chest.

Spike kept hearing her whisper that she was sorry and his heart broke for her. He really hoped that Hank would be okay as they waited for the ambulance to arrive.





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