Sounds like "
Breaking a Slayer" by Dark Rhiannon (on Just Rewards):
Summary: This is loosely based on BtVS "Who Are You" and "This Year's Girl" with lines from those and from Ats "Sanctuary," and other eps, however, I would call it AU because I've played bloody hell with the timelines. Dawn doesn't exist, Buffy hasn't slept with Riley yet, Spike's feelings are more pronounced, and events happen quite a bit differently than they did in either series. Buffy/Spike/Angel. Xander/Anya. Willow/Tara.
Author's Notes:
NC-17-XXX with warnings for non-consensual sex, really graphic rape of a major character (of all kinds! not for the faint of heart!), torture, character death, other kinds of sex, slash and just general angst.