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Chapter 11

By the time Buffy woke up the next morning, it was past eleven o' clock, and she had a hangover to end all hangovers. She staggered to her bathroom and downed two painkillers, before slipping into her clothes of the previous night, and venturing out of her room. Last night, and all the incredible things that had happened, seemed like a dream. The kisses, the Well-House. Spike. Had he meant all those things he'd said? She peered out of the window and saw that all the cars were parked on the drive. So, he was still here. She padded across to his room, suddenly shy at the prospect of seeing him. Xander and Willow were still in bed, she could hear them talking softly, but the door to Spike's room was partly open, and the bed was empty. Buffy leaned her head back against the wall and fought off a wave of nausea. She wanted to see him before he went, but why did she feel so awkward about it? He hadn't wanted to stay with her when they'd finally made it upstairs, but she understood his reasons for that. He had to finish with Drusilla first because of her. The scarlet woman who'd lured him away. Drusilla was really going to hate her for this.


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Spike was already up, his mind on the unpleasant task that needed to be done some time today. He was determined to get it done sooner rather than later. No point in putting it off. That wouldn't be fair to anyone. Dru wasn't going to like it one bit and who could blame her? But he really had had enough of it all. Buffy had just brought forward the inevitable. Buffy. As he dressed, he remembered how she'd clung to him when he'd deposited her in her bed. She couldn't hold her drink, that was for sure. It would have been taking advantage to stay with her, pure and simple, and there was no way he was doing that. He made his way down to the kitchen and looked around for the coffee. When she came down he'd say good morning then go do what he had to do.


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Willow slowly drifted out of sleep, and focused on her surroundings. Unfamiliar. The walls were the wrong colour and her teddy was suddenly - Xander shaped? She sat up and looked down at his sleeping form. What on earth had they got up to last night? They'd played Clue, but she had no memory of anything after that. A lot of kissing, yeah, and Buffy and Spike had been all over each other, but there wasn't anything about them getting into bed together. As she racked her foggy brain, he started to stir, and she felt a moment of panic. What if he regretted what happened? If anything had happened. Surely she should be able to remember it?


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Xander woke up feeling warm, and happy, and utterly satisfied with life. He opened his eyes to the sight of Willow looking down on him, and he couldn't imagine a better way to start the day. He gave her a lazy smile and tried to pull her down for a kiss but it suddenly dawned on him that she didn't look that happy. His heart sank a little. "Hey."

"Hey."

At least she was speaking to him. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Willow sat up, feeling a bit self conscious in her skimpy nightie. "Xander?"

Uh oh, here it comes, he thought. He'd heard this one so many times, he ought to write a book. This wasn't supposed to be happening. It had felt so good, so right. He steeled himself for the brush off, wondering what he'd done wrong this time. Well, apart from jumping into bed with her without asking. What an idiot he was.

"I want to ask you something."

"Yes Willow, I'll be friends with you." He sighed. "That's what you were going to say wasn't it?

Willow looked a little confused but carried on. "Of course I want to be your friend Xander , but after we came to bed, did we, did we, do..."

"No, we didn't. I'd never take advantage of you. You must know that."

Willow flung herself onto his very manly chest, and hugged him. "Thank you Xander."

Now he was confused. "Does this mean you're not mad at me?"

She snuggled in even closer. "A lot of men would have, taken what they could. I was pretty drunk last night. Thanks for being such a gentleman."

Xander pulled the quilt up around them, his happy mood quickly returning. "My pleasure ma'am," he said in an American drawl. "Does this mean I can kiss you now?"


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Buffy pushed open the kitchen door and was hit by the smell of coffee. Her stomach did a little flip and she wasn't sure whether it was the sight of Spike, leaning against the kitchen counter and drinking a cup of the stuff, or her delicate stomach. She ran a hand through her hair, which felt, and probably looked, like a haystack. "Morning."

"You look hungover."

"I feel it, why don't you?" It wasn't fair. Apart from slightly messed up hair, he looked perfectly normal. And she knew he'd had a lot more to drink than her.

"Used to it." He poured out a coffee and handed it to her. "I guess you're not?"

Buffy put the coffee down on the table. "Can't face that right now. Did you sleep okay?"

"Yes and no. C'm'ere Buffy."

He held out his arms and she sank gratefully against him and remembered what he'd felt like last night. It hadn't been a dream. The hand stroking her hair was the same. His voice, the feel of his chest. It was all there.

"Feeling rough?"

"You could say. I was afraid I'd dreamt it all."

"Last night?" He gave a little laugh. "That would have been some dream." He crooked his neck down to look at her. "No regrets then?"

"No, you?"

"None. Not looking forward to today though."

"With Dru? When will you see her?

"Going straight round. No point in putting it off."

"I feel bad for her Spike. Feel like I've stolen you away from her."

"You haven't Buffy, honest. It would have happened anyway. It's not going to be nice, but you've got to trust me on this."

"I do Spike." She pulled back as she heard footsteps on the stairs. "Looks like the others are up."

Spike drained his cup. "Yeah I gotta go." He placed a swift kiss on her lips. "Give me your phone number, I'll call you later."

"I've got some cards somewhere. Morning Willow, Xander. Spike was just leaving. Help yourself to coffee, cereal, toast."

Buffy followed Spike out and handed him his coat. "Let me know how it goes. " She handed him one of the change-of- address cards that she'd had printed to send to her friends back in the States, and he slipped it into his coat pocket. "Call me, please." God, that sounded needy, but she was close to tears as he walked towards the door. What if he couldn't do it? Finish with Dru. She didn't know Drusilla, but from what Spike had said, she wasn't the type to give up easily. What if Dru wouldn't let him go?

She knew she pulled funny faces when she cried, and she was doing it now. Spike frowned at her and framed her face with his hands.

"Chin up girl." He bent down for another kiss, brushing the tears away with his thumbs. "I'll call you as soon as I've seen her.

He kissed her again and then just held her, as she clung to him. She felt a bit silly when she pulled away, sniffing and wiping her nose on her sleeve. "Sorry, I don't know what came over me. Bad headache. That and I just don't want you to go."

"Got to love. Hey, why don't you go check out that poetry book you were reading last night? Left you a note."

"You did?" Oh heck, he hadn't seen that book had he?

She watched until his car was out of sight, then she went back upstairs to take a shower. As she undressed, she flicked through the poetry book. Page 42. Pulling on her bathrobe, she settled back on the bed to read it. Whoa, it was good, it was very erotic and it was - his. The name at the bottom of the poem simply read - Spike.


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Spike let himself into his flat, threw his keys onto the table and picked up the phone. He'd rehearsed it over and over in the car, but his hand was still shaking as he dialled the number, let it ring, switched it off. Did it again.

She sounded in a good mood when he finally got hold of her, and he could hear laughter in the background.

"Hi Dru. Look I need to see you. Yes now. You at The Frog? I'm gonna grab a shower, then I'm coming over."

By the time he got there, she'd gone. A small group of her college friends were clustered around the infamous Johnny, but no Dru. Spike scanned the bar, wondering if she'd gone to the bathroom or something. Then one of her friends caught his eye.

"Hi, Spike." She motioned him over. "You looking for Dru?" The bar was busy and they had to shout to be heard. "'Cause she's gone to your place. You'd better go after her, she's a bit..." the girl waggled her head towards Johnny. "Dunno what he gave her, but she was in a very good mood when she left."

"Shit." Spike wanted to strangle her, then he wanted to punch Johnny's lights out. "You're supposed to be her friend. Why d'you let her do this?"

"Why do you Spike?" She looked him up and down. "She was pretty upset last night, could have done with you here. Where were you?"

"Bugger off Darla. When did she leave?"

Darla sidled up to him and ran her finger up his arm. "Because if you two aren't...I'm so free right now."

"I said bugger off." Spike slapped her hand away. "What's she been saying?"

"Hit a nerve did I? Well, apparently you've been a bit lacking in the . . ." she looked pointedly at Spike's crotch, and smirked. "She tells me everything you know."

"Is that a fact?" Spike gave her a cold smile and felt in his pocket for his keys. "You don't want to believe everything you hear love." Then he turned and made his way through the crowd, fists clenched, jaw twitching. He was sick to the back teeth of it all. The bloody humiliation. Having to defend his manhood to Darla, of all people. If he ever saw that crowd again, it would be too fucking soon. He just wanted out.


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By the time Buffy emerged from the shower, Willow and Xander had gone. There was a note on the kitchen table.

Sorry we sneaked off. You looked like you could use some peace and quiet. Thanks for a great evening. I'll call you. Willow

To tell the truth, she was relieved. She couldn't concentrate on anything but what Spike was doing with Dru. How was it going? Would he do it? She looked at the phone. Call me Spike, please. I can't bear this. It didn't ring. She made herself a drink, grabbed a couple of cookies and went back upstairs. Sleep was what she needed more than anything, well, apart from Spike calling. She sat down on her bed and picked up the clock. He'd been gone less than an hour, and she'd counted every agonising minute. Buffy picked up the phone and placed it carefully on her pillow, then she laid her head next to it and focused all her determination on making it ring. Within minutes she was fast asleep.


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Spike found his front door unlocked when he got back home. She was here then. He took a deep breath and pushed it open. Dru was lying full-length on the couch, one arm on her chest, the other dangling to the floor. The television was blaring. For a moment he thought she was asleep, or worse, unconscious. He was at her side in three strides, dropping to his knees beside the couch and reaching for her hand. Not now, please not now. "Dru?" He shook her, "Dru, wake up."

Drusilla snapped one eye open and a big grin spread across her face. "Gotcha!" She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the couch. "Your face Spike, was a picture. You didn't really think I was..." She creased over, laughing at her own joke, stopping only when she realised that he wasn't.

Spike dropped her hand and sat back on his heels. "What the bloody hell was that about?"

She leaned forward and ran her hand lightly across his chest. "That, was about you being a naughty boy and leaving me all alone last night."

"You nearly gave me a sodding heart attack." Spike pushed himself to his feet. She was making it easy for him, and that somehow wasn't right. He'd got it stuck in his mind somewhere that this needed to be hard on him. That if he suffered now, it would somehow absolve him. But the words slipped right out, nice and easy. "I can't take any more of this Dru." It almost sounded like someone else was saying them. "I've had enough, let's cool it, we can still be friends." He didn't really mean that one. All the old clichés. It shocked him how readily they rolled off his tongue. And all the while she just stood there, arms folded, waiting for him to finish. Then she sat down and picked up the TV remote control.

"So, Spikey, what do you wanna watch?"

"Dru." He sat down next to her. "Have you heard a word I've said?"

She flicked channels. "Ooh, look, James Bond, with Pierce whats-is-name. I like him."

No, It wasn't going to be easy.

He leaned over, took the remote from her and flicked off the TV. "Dru, love, look at me. Do you know what I'm trying to say?"

"Not listening, not listening." She put her hands over her ears and rocked backwards and forwards, sticking her tongue out at him like a child. "Can't hear you."

"Dru," he tried to pull her hands away but she wriggled out of his grasp and stood up, eyes blazing.

"I said, I'm - not - listening." She screamed it at the top of her voice. "Can't... " her voice trailed away, "hear - you." She slumped back down on the couch and dropped her hands to her lap. "Did you say something, Spike?"

Spike was dumb-struck. What kind of shit was he? Doing this to her when she was in this state. It took him two attempts before he was able to speak. "What did you take Dru?"

"Dunno," she sounded like a little girl. "That stuff from Johnny."

"We need to get you help, Dru, you know that, don't you?"

"Yeah, I guess," she nodded slowly and then turned to him. "But you'll help me, won't you?" Her hand crept round his back as she leaned her head against his chest. "Help me Spike, I'm so scared."

"Bloody hell Dru," Spike's arm went around her and pulled her close. "What the hell am I going to do with you?"


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Dru smiled as she pressed her face against Spike's shirt. She'd known this was coming for a long time, but did he really think he was going to get away that easily? Spike belonged to her. Had since the moment she'd set eyes on him. He was just being silly, paying her back for not wanting to spend a boring evening with his boring friends. And this was a game they'd played before. Would play again. That's what made this so special. The passion. He needed it and so did she. Her hands moved round to his belt buckle and slowly started to undo it. "Got just the thing for you pet. You just lie back and Dru'll kiss it all better."





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