By Heather Martin

*You can lie to others. You can lie to yourself. But you can’t lie to your dreams .*

Spoilers- Grave

Disclaimer- Joss owns all the characters from Buffy TVS. The soul mate principle idea was taken from L.J. Smith’s book series called Night World.

Distribution- Sure, just ask

Summary- Anyone know what dissociative fugue amnesia is? Well, Spike develops such a case after his sudden shiny soul, along with the unexpected return of humanity. He just can’t cope, so he pretends to be somebody he‘s not. As for Buffy, she lies to herself that Spike’s absence hasn’t effected her. But at night, she cannot keep him out of her dreams. What will happen to these two lost souls? Will they ever find their way? And will it be together?

This occurs after Grave. The time between episodes are unclear. Pretend that everything after ‘As You Were ‘only spanned a couple weeks. If you think about it, that makes sense. Seeing Red, Villians, 2 to Go, and Grave all happened in a couple days.

Chapter 15

A few days went by before Buffy and Spike could leave England. Giles insisted on recording every single detail on their experience. Also, there was the matter with Spike’s home. It was impossible to pack all his stuff in a suitcase and carry it on the plane with them, even if he did own few things. Giles agreed to arranging the house itself for sale. The possessions Spike desired to keep were to be shipped over after the pair arrived back in Sunnydale and had settled down.

At the moment Buffy was preparing to call home while Spike packed. He was having a hard time deciding what to squeeze into two traveling cases.

The phone rang three times before it was picked up. “Hello?”

“Dawn?” Buffy replied.

“Buffy? Is everything okay?” Dawn asked.

“Yeah, everything’s great. I’m coming home.”

“Should we meet you at the airport?”

The slayer glanced at Spike. He picked up a CD, put it in the suitcase, then thinking better of it, took it out and replaced it with another. A smile tugged at her lips. He was so adorable. Why hadn’t she realized that before? Well, actually she had. He had always been pleasing to look at, but she had never got tingly fluttering feelings in her stomach when doing so before. That part was new.

“No, that’s not necessary. We’ll meet up at the house.” No need in causing her friends to have a heart-attack, which they certainly would if they saw her step off a plane with Spike in broad daylight and not becoming a crispy critter.

“Ok.”

“So, how’ve you been?” Buffy asked with a more chipper tone.

“Oh, uh, fine. I’ve been spending time with Xander a whole lot. And, Cleo’s pretty nifty. She can light candles with her hands.”

“I’m glad you’re having a good time, Dawnie. Wait a minute, Cleo‘s been showing you spells?”

“Don’t worry, she’s not teaching me to do any magic. She just shows me what ‘she’ can do.”

There was a pause. “Buffy, did you find him?”

The slayer gripped the pone tighter. “Yeah, I . . . I did.”

A squeal was heard on the other end of the line. “Oh my gosh! So, is he coming back with you?”

Buffy watched Spike close a suitcase. He looked up at her and smiled.

“Pretty sure, “ Buffy answered.

“That’s . . .” Dawn seemed to suddenly remember how she was supposed to be mad at him. “I’m happy that he’s coming home, but I haven’t forgotten what he’s done.”

“I know. I don’t think he is likely to make the same mistake again, though. Even if he tried.”

The last part had been said lowly. Spike caught it with his acute hearing and raised an eyebrow. She acted as if she didn’t notice.

“How do you know he has changed his ways? That’s what we thought before. That he would never hurt one of us.”

“Trust me, I know. And, Dawn . . .” She sighed. “He would never hurt you. He didn’t even mean to hurt me.”

Buffy saw Spike’s expression full of guilt. She moved to sit next to him on the bed. She took his hand and squeezed.

“Don’t tell the others I’m bringing Spike home with me, okay?”

“Wha . . . Why?”

“Please. It’s my news to break.”

“Whatever.”

“Thanks. I’ll see you soon. Love you.”

“Yeah, love you too. Tell Spike . . . Never mind, I’ll talk to him when he gets here.”

“Bye.” Buffy hung up the telephone.

She turned her head in Spike‘s direction. He was staring at the wall with a blank stare. She stroked his palm with her thumb. “Spike, are you okay?”

He took in a deep breath. “The bit holds ill feelings toward me I take it. Hell, the whole lot, right?”

“It’ll be all right. They’ll forgive you when they learn how sorry you are.”

He let out a snort. “Sure, the whelp’ll invite me to play pool and chug beer with him after we explain ‘everything’,” he said with sarcasm.

She knew he was talking about the baby. She nodded her head with understanding. He was speaking the truth. When Xander found out about her pregnancy there was no idea how he would take it. One thing was sure, however, and that was that he wouldn’t take it well.

“This isn’t going to be a picnic, that’s for sure,” she agreed. “But we can’t stay hidden away on the other side of the earth. Whatever happens, we’ll get through it. Because, we have each other.”

Blue eyes fell on her. His gaze was so intense that she felt as if she were drowning in them. Not being able to take it any more, she drew him close to her and kissed him. When they pulled away, she leaned her head on his shoulder.

“I feel so scared. But at the same time, I’m excited as well. Everything has changed for us. We have a new future,” Buffy professed.

His arm wrapped around her. “That’s right, pet. We have a whole life ahead of us. I say we make the most of it.”

She took her hand and placed it over his heart. The thumping she felt filled her with confidence.

* + * + * + *

“Bye, Giles,” Buffy said. She hugged the man with feeling.

“Goodbye, Buffy. Don’t hesitate to call me if there is anything you need,” he informed.

“I won’t,” she replied, stepping back.

The two males were left eying each other awkwardly. After a moment, Spike stuck out his hand. Giles took his hand and shook it.

“You’ve been given something not many receive, a second chance at life. I suggest you don’t waste it,” Giles told the ex-vampire.

Spike didn’t know what to say or do. He ended up ruining the moment by saying, “Bye, Rupes. Or should I say, Grandpa?”

Giles released his hand.

Buffy rolled her eyes. She grabbed Spike’s arm and tugged. “Come on, Spike, let’s get on the plane.” Why did Spike always have to mess with a good moment?

The couple began to walk away. Spike called back, “We’ll be sure to bring Itty Bitty back for a family visit.”

Buffy pinched his arm.

He sent her a glare. “Hey!”

“Why did you have to do that?”

“What?”

“He was trying to be nice and you had to get smart.”

“Sorry, pet, couldn’t resist.”

They boarded the plane and sat down. Spike insisted on having the window seat. He kept his gaze out the window most of the flight.

“Spike, how is it that you act as if this is the first time you’ve seen the sun? You’ve been human for two months now,” Buffy stated.

“Yeah, but I didn’t remember being a vamp then. Now I do and I know how amazing this all is.”

About half way there, Spike said,” Buffy, as soon as we get home you have to make a doctor’s appointment.”

“You and Giles are so the worriers. I went before to confirm the pregnancy.”

“Yeah, but that was before you came to England. Before the eliminator,” he pointed out.

Her hand went to her stomach. “Oh, my god! What if something did happen? I mean, that electricity was pretty severe.”

“No need to panic, luv. I’m sure she’s fine. I would know if there was anything drastically wrong. I still got my senses ya know.”

Buffy smiled. “Sure it’s a she then, huh?”

“Come now, this is a Summers.”

“It’s also part Shayne. “ Her upward mouth faltered. “That is your real last name, right?”

“Sure is. William Alan Shayne.”

“I like that.”

The rest of the trip went smoothly. Buffy managed to not get sick this time, which she was very grateful with.

Spike was carrying his two suitcases as they walked. “Buffy, maybe you should have let the others meet us. My arms are hurting me.”

“Don’t be a baby. You’ve got vampire strength. And how would you have liked to hop off the plane and be confronted by Xander first thing. He wouldn’t have let you even get out a word before he punched you in the nose.”

“Speaking of vampire strength,” Spike reminded her,” I could have punched him right back. With more force. Problem solved.”

Both of them halted. They set down their luggage and stared ahead at the house. Neither wanted to move from that spot, afraid to death of what lay inside for them to face.

“Did the bit say she was going to be home when we arrived?” Spike asked.

“She didn’t say,” Buffy answered.

They picked up their suitcases again and went up the driveway. Buffy entered the house first. She was surprised to be confronted by five other people. She dropped her suitcases, startled.

“Uh. . . Hi, guys,” she stammered.

The door opened behind her and Spike came inside. At first his face showed alarm, but then he hid it with a smirk. “Hello all, miss me?”

Xander stepped forward. He pointed at Spike while addressing Buffy. “What is he doing here!?”

“Uh, well . . .” Buffy began.

“Aw, Harris, no hug?” Spike remarked.

With fury in his eyes, Xander threw a swing at Spike. Spike reciprocated the motion. Then he turned to Buffy.

“See, luv. We could have just gotten that over with at the airport.”

_________________________________________________

Thanks, Cara, I think I’m gonna use your idea about the eliminator working for another bigger bad.

Sorry for the delay on this, I’ve been sort of busy.