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Chapter 22


The conversation filling the apartment had yet to breech the subject they were there to discuss. However, it could be felt lurking in the corners waiting for the moment to invade the camaraderie among the gathered guests.

Typically, the sexes had divided themselves between the rooms of kitchen and dining room. Spike was holding court in the kitchen with Xander and Angel. Their favorite topics of video games and cars were being bantered about in a display of macho competitiveness as to what was the best and brightest.

The five women present were seated around the table. Buffy sat at one end facing the kitchen. Like sentries on either side of her were Willow and Cordelia. And on the opposite end of the table was Kate sitting sideways so she could confidently drift between conversations.

And lastly Buffy’s mother was seated beside Willow. She was subdued as her eyes darted from one group to the other. There was an almost stunned expression gracing her countenance. It was unbelievable to her that her once housebound daughter had friends. Not only friends but was building a life that included gatherings such as this.

It was a little overwhelming but also exhilarating to Buffy to have a house full of people. There was a haze fluttering around her mind as she tried to cope with this. Maybe if her mother wasn’t there, waiting to pounce at the first sign of weakness from her, she would feel differently.

Thankfully everyone else seemed to be comfortable together which helped to make things easier. Xander and Willow had been welcomed into Spike’s group without qualms. Already new relationships were being bonded over their dinner.

Deciding not to bother to cook, Spike had picked up pizzas, wings and salad from an Italian restaurant down the street. It seemed to be one of the deciding factors in the lapse of priorities in conversation. The spicy fragrance of peppers and onions had seduced them all to eat first. And now, everyone was busy filling up on the food in between sentences that flowed freely between them.

The buzzing of words and laughter between Buffy’s friends helped to ease some of her anxiety. They created a wall between her and her panic at being in this unfamiliar atmosphere. Buffy breathed deeply to try and focus again. Her hands tore apart a paper napkin in her lap as she took in what was going on around her.

A part of her couldn’t relax. Faith was constantly with her. It was like climbing a mountain and you were almost to the top but every time you looked up it seemed to be same distance away. She wanted it over with. Until this matter had been finished, she couldn’t figure out what she was doing next. She knew what she wanted and even thought it was the best choice for her, but Spike wasn’t open to discussion about her future. She glanced over at him as she gave a huge sigh.

“Tired of us gabbing away?” Kate asked with a grin. She glanced at her watch. “It’s almost seven thirty; maybe we should get down to business.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Buffy said, looking contrite. “It’s just me. I don’t want anyone to feel…”

“It’s okay,” Cordelia chimed in. “Really, we do need to figure this out. We’ll have plenty of time for hanging out later.”

Later. It was one of those things that Buffy wondered if she would have with this group. With Spike. She glanced back at him to find him studying her with indiscernible emotions filling his blue eyes. It shook her to her core to see how closed off he was from her at the moment. Already Spike was putting distance between them and she was determined that she wouldn’t let him go too far away from her.

“All right, everybody,” Kate said, pulling everyone’s attention to her. “We need some brainstorming on where Peterson might have put Faith’s…body,” she paused as she reached over to cover Buffy’s hand with her own. Quickly she reiterated the clues that might help them to find her.

“Wouldn’t he have just gotten rid of her as quickly as possible?” Xander asked. “Like a dumpster or even the dump itself.”

“Maybe if he was panicked or something,” Kate said. “I just don’t know if he would do that though.”

“From what Will has told me,” Angel offered, moving into the living room to take a seat on the arm of the couch. “It seems to me that he had the whole scenario with Faith planned out, just like he did with Buffy. Scouted out a girl, figured out how to get her to come with him, then knew he would kill her when it was over. Using Buffy’s words against her, he would draw her further into his delusions of them being in a relationship.”

“You mean like making them Bonnie and Clyde?” Willow asked, looking around toward Angel.

“No, no, that’s not right,” Buffy protested. “He said he wasn’t going to come back for me. He was going to leave me there to die.”

A shudder ran through her and she crossed her arms in front of her. Every word was bringing her nightmare to a jarring reality because it was no longer locked away in her head. It was out in the open. Other people knew. They were talking about it. It wasn’t something she could push to the back of her mind in a desire for denial.

Spike came to her, reaching for her, so he could switch places with her. He took a seat before drawing her down onto his lap. His arms closed around her as his chin rested on her shoulder. No one except her mother seemed to think anything was amiss in his actions. Buffy could hear the subtle sniff of indignation that her mother gave. She ignored it. She was in Spike’s arms and she was safe.

“Buffy, was that the last night you saw him?” Kate asked, leaning on her forearms as she met Buffy’s gaze. Her voice was filled with kindness as if she knew how much this was costing the young woman.

“Once,” Buffy answered. “He came to visit me one more time.”

Her hand covered her face as images swirled in front of her. All these people knew. They all knew what she had done with Peterson. They all knew what she did with Spike. It didn’t matter how much they cared or how much they were trying to help. She felt dirty and wrong under their scrutiny.

“Is this necessary?” Joyce snapped. “Look at her…she can’t handle this. She needs to just put this whole thing behind her and get on with her life.”

“Behind locked doors at home,” Spike sarcastically replied. “Oh, yeah, she had a life there, didn’t she?”

“She was safe there.”

“Stop it,” Buffy said, coming out from her hiding spot. “I can handle this, Mom.” She raised her chin in the air and took the time to look everyone in the eye. She had faced worse in the past few days. She would get through this.

“Mrs. Summers,” Kate said, with a nod toward Buffy. “We understand your concern. Unfortunately, Buffy is the only way we have of proving Peterson murdered this other girl. She is the only one who can put the pieces together.”

“I just don’t understand why this is Buffy’s concern,” Joyce protested. “She isn’t responsible for what that man did.”

“Just like I wasn’t the concern for all those volunteers that helped search for me,” Buffy said, quietly. “It’s something that you know is right and you just have to do it. No matter how much it hurts.”

Spike kissed her cheek, squeezing her extra tight, and she could feel his love flowing over her. The expression on the faces of the people surrounding her showed they understood what she said. They had all made the same choice at some point in their lives. She felt that she belonged here with them. It gave her the boost that she needed to continue.

“He only came back one other time after that,” Buffy said with the barest of a waver in her voice. “That night is when I unconsciously started slipping in and out of that place in my head.” She put her hands into Spike’s, curling her fingers beneath his as if he could keep her from falling too deep. “He asked me if I wanted for him to bring someone new. I said no, shaking my head, and hoping he would leave. He slapped me when I drifted away, but it didn’t help. I guess he got frustrated and just left. I don’t remember him leaving.”

“I don’t understand why he didn’t come back,” Angel said, after everyone absorbed her words for a moment. “He enjoyed the responses he got for his cruelty. So, why would he just leave you down there to die? He wouldn’t be able to enjoy the act.”

“I’m with you, Angel,” Spike agreed. “He kept trophies, the uniform, the underwear, and he even asked Buffy to help him do it again. I would think he’d come back for her and take her with him.”

Kate drummed her fingers on the table for a second or two as she seemed to be trying to connect something. The others waited for her to say whatever was on her mind. She snapped her fingers and looked up at Buffy.

“Do you have any recollection of time passing while you were there?”

“Uh-uh,” Buffy answered. “It was all the same down there…just endless darkness.”

“What are you thinking?” Angel asked, leaning forward with his hands on his knees.

“Well, what if he was going to come back?” Kate said, glancing around at everyone. “What if…?”

“But when I saw him, he told me he wasn’t,” Buffy interrupted.

“You talked to him?” Joyce interjected, harshness coating every word. “What the hell were you thinking, Spike? Are you trying to send her back to the hospital?”

Buffy leaned back against Spike wishing she could hide inside of him. Let his bravery lead her through her mother’s anger. Facing the past she could do. It was the rejection of her parents that frightened her. If she didn’t have them to fall back on then she was alone.

“It’s okay, lamb,” Spike whispered, so that no one else could hear. “Don’t lose it now. You can do it.”

Her eyes fluttered closed as she let his words bring her back to what had brought her here. The reason she had left Sunnydale. The reason she had come to him.

“I chose to see him,” Buffy sternly said. “It was my decision and I survived…more than survived. I realized he is nothing more than a man.”

“Buffy has been holding up wonderfully,” Cordelia said, flashing a smile that showed how proud of Buffy she was. “She’s coped with quite a bit this week and just keeps getting stronger.”

“Thank you,” Buffy said, returning the other woman’s smile. Buffy ignored her mother’s dramatic sigh and slump back into her chair to show her continued disapproval in Buffy’s actions. It only made her stronger. Buffy reached over to squeeze Cordelia’s hand.

“It’s okay,” Cordelia remarked. “You’re spunky and it’s growing on me.”

Everyone but Joyce laughed. It was okay though, because everyone here cared about her. She just had to remember that as she flushed under Cordy’s praise. It felt good.

“Why would he tell Buffy he wasn’t coming back for her if he was?” Willow asked. “I mean what would he have to gain from it now.”

“To play games with her,” Cordelia answered. “Her survival and freedom has got to be frustrating him. Especially if he considered her his partner and that he got punished because of her. He would think she sold him out and he’d do anything to try and get back at her.”

“If he was going to come back then where did he disappear to until we caught up with him?” Spike asked.

“He went away to hide Faith,” Kate answered. “If she was his first kill and he wanted to be able to admire his handiwork then wouldn’t he take her somewhere where he could visit her?”

“But where?” Angel asked.

“His parent’s house,” Xander answered. “I mean he would be with her all the time. That is if he hadn’t gotten busted.”

“Too obvious,” Spike said. “Besides it was thoroughly searched after his arrest. There wasn’t anything that indicated a grave or a body hidden there.”

“You asked him where she was, didn’t you?” Kate asked, searching Buffy’s face. “What did he tell you?”

“That she likes big houses and she was probably living in one now,” Buffy said. There was excitement humming in the air as the clues began to fit together like a jigsaw puzzle. She had no doubt that this group would figure it out.

“Maybe a massive crypt,” Willow said. “If he was rich he could have bought one or something.”

“Good idea,” Angel answered. “But I think it would be too public. Eventually someone would have spotted him there and start asking questions.”

“The Peterson’s owned a vacation home,” Joyce spoke up, surprising everyone with her comment. “It was near Santa Barbara.”

“Bloody hell, I’d forgotten all about that,” Spike swore. “There was a copy of the warrant in the case file.”

“It was searched,” Kate said. “But they didn’t find anything according to the file.”

“Was it before or after Buffy was found?” Willow asked. “Because they weren’t looking for anyone else, were they? They were just looking for evidence to prosecute on Buffy’s case, right?”

“That’s right,” Spike mused. “If they weren’t looking for her then they might have overlooked something crucial.”

“Wouldn’t it be kind of hard to overlook a body?” Xander asked. “I mean she wouldn’t exactly fit in a bread box.”

“And wouldn’t a vacation house be too public to hide a body?” Kate asked, looking around. “Wouldn’t there be people around all the time?”

“It was an exclusive community,” Joyce answered, leaning forward. “The houses were big, expensive and far apart.”

“How do you know this?” Buffy asked.

“During the lawsuit,” Joyce answered, her eyes filling with tears. “They had to list everything they owned for the settlement. It was on there.”

“Sounds like that might be it,” Kate said. “It’s only a couple of hours drive from here. He could have easily done it.”

“I’ll call Roberts and see what we need for a search warrant,” Spike said. “We may have just cracked this case.”

“Yay, for Mrs. Summers,” Xander said, applauding. “I vote she’s an official part of the team.”

The others clapped, adding their own whoops and congratulations. Joyce smiled at Buffy, mouthing an “I love you” at her daughter. It felt like the start of a new beginning with her mother being a part of the life Buffy was building here. She went to give her mother a hug as Spike headed for the phone to call his Captain. The atmosphere was tingling with excitement that they might have found the answers that Buffy needed.

Willow suggested congratulatory ice cream sundaes and everyone headed for the kitchen to make their own. And for the first time in years Buffy felt almost normal again.

to be continued…





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