Hank entered the house last after unlocking the door and letting Dru and Joyce in ahead of him. He could tell by Joyce's expression she had something on her mind, and he was afraid she was going to confront both him and Dru before he had time to tell her about Dru. He prayed his wife didn't, for he needed to tell her what had happened while she was with Buffy.
He felt both relieved and anxious when Dru turned to them and said, "I'm going to bed now."
Joyce couldn't hold back when she asked, "Don't you want to know how Buffy is?"
Dru sighed as she replied in a deadened voice, "I'm sure she is doing fine considering, or you wouldn't be here with us now."
"We'll see you in the morning, Princess. Try and get some sleep." Hank encouraged, hoping to divert Joyce's attention toward him instead.
Joyce realized Hank was trying to protect Dru for some reason and decided to let her go and find out what her husband was really up to. Her gut told her he knew the truth about who left Dawn alone that night, and she wanted to know why he was protecting Drusilla right now.
"Good night." Dru said as she turned and walked up the stairs like a woman in a trance.
Joyce gave Hank a knowing look before heading toward the kitchen. It was an area where they had many private talks before everything fell apart so long ago. Sitting at the table sharing some warm chocolate with marshmallows had been one of her favorite pastimes with her husband and it was something she hoped they could get back.
Hank felt a sense of ease come over him as he followed his wife to the kitchen. This was one of the rooms he loved the most. He enjoyed the time he and Joyce would spend here in the past. It was the place he spent with his girls, going over their homework, and where he'd sit and plan out his daughters' futures.
*******
Dru walked up the stairs looking at the pictures of the Summers' family on the wall as she did so. Until Dawn's death, she'd been envious of the young girl's life, and wished she'd be born in Dawn's place. Dawn was so young and innocent, protected and loved just because she was all those things and Buffy was too. What fueled her jealousy toward Buffy was her sister's ability to make friends with everyone around her. All the boys wished the petite blonde was their girlfriend, when all they just wanted her was for a good rough and tumble and nothing more. The fact that Buffy had always been the goody two shoes and she the bad girl cause the resentment to burn deep into her soul.
She walked into her room closing and then locking the door behind her. She truly believed beyond any reason or doubt that no one would check on her this night. But she wasn't taking any chances if they did. She wanted to get as much distance between her and them as she could before they found out she'd ran.
"No one will care or even cry and some may wish that I would die because I'm not Buffy. I'm only me and I never was good enough." Dru whispered as she began to gather what she'd need to take with her.
She pulled out her special box that she kept all her life and lifted the lid. Lying on the top was a picture taken when she first came to live with her father and his family. Staring up at her was Hank and Joyce sitting with Buffy and Dawn on their laps and Dru standing behind them. There were no pictures of Buffy and Dawn standing behind, always her. This one had become the typical family picture set up.
"I wish I could take it back, but not really. To be honest I don't know anymore what I want, for all I ever wanted was to be loved above all. It was good while it lasted, but it's time to face reality, I was never meant to be loved for how do you love a mistake, something no one really wanted, but was only stuck with." Dru said quietly, "I hate you Buffy and yet I love you. Can that make sense?"
Replacing the picture in the box she closed the lid and decided there and then she'd never have a family of her own. It was too hard and she was sure by the time she was done making a living no man would want to settle down with her anyway. No, she'd go collect her things at college and move on, go and see what there was out there for her.
She packed what she could in her knapsack of the things she wanted to take. Looking down at the box of mementos she started to cry knowing she was leaving everything behind for a reason. She was no longer Drusilla Summers, now she was just a girl on the street that would do what it takes to survive.
"Mummy was right and Grandmother too. I'm just a poison and I kill everything around me." Dru whispered as she looked around the room she once thought of as her home.
Quietly and swiftly she opened the window and climbed out onto the tree branch she used so many times to sneak out. This time would be the last as she scurried down the tree and ran from the house she used to call home. She knew she wasn't strong as Buffy, and couldn't face the wrath she so deserved.
*******
Buffy led Spike up the steps to the door, her lips still tingling from their kiss. Her heart was racing from a mixture of anxiety at seeing her friends and still feeling the after effects from his kiss. She wished they'd waited to see her until tomorrow, but then again she felt special they were here waiting to see her.
"Is it bad of me that I hope they don't stay long? I need to rest and my eyes are starting to feel like sandpaper."
Spike squeezed her hand to reassure her as he replied, "I have a feeling Anya gave them complete instructions to leave once we arrived."
"I hope you're right, or I'm crawling on the couch and they can watch me sleep." Buffy said as she fought off a yawn.
Spike reached over to open the door, prepared to ask everyone to leave shortly after they said their hellos. He'd play the bad guy and make them leave but he was sure they'd understand once they saw how worn out and exhausted Buffy looked. He just wasn't about to tell her that.
What greeted Buffy when she entered warmed her heart. There they stood waiting with their gear ready to leave with loving smiles on their faces. Faith stood with a tall glass of water in her hands and a determined look on her face.
"First off, hugs for everyone and then we go. Then you drink your water like a good girl before going to bed. Anya's orders and you know we do as Mama Hen says." Faith announced, with a twinkle in her eyes.
"Let's hear it for the mighty feathered one." Spike chuckled as he moved aside and let the others pay their respects to his girl.
Lorne was the first to approach as he hugged her close. "Good thing I like you, or we'd have a cat fight for handsome over yonder."
Buffy laughed as she replied as she hugged him back fiercely, "You're lucky I like you or I'd kick your ass from here to another dimension where you'd be some demon's bitch."
"Oh, honey I'm happy we didn't lose you."
Buffy felt her tears start to form as she leaned back and kissed Lorne's cheek and said, "I feel blessed I have a wonderful family."
"Can I be your best sister?" Lorne asked jokingly as someone smacked him on his ass.
"You'll be some demon meat if you don't haul ass and let me have my turn." Darla teased the man.
Buffy felt his kiss on her cheek before he whispered, "I love ya' kiddo, like the sister I should've had." Before stepping back and letting Darla have her turn.
"About time, hug hog." Darla giggled as she then looked Buffy up and down and said, "You look like hell but I'm damn happy to see your beautiful mug."
I guess this is where we hug or just stare at each other?" Buffy snorted, finding it hard not to smile.
For the first time anyone could remember, Darla started to cry as she hugged Buffy close, "I was so afraid we were going to lose you. I tried to be positive, but you know me, Miss Negative underneath. I've never been so scared in my life and don't you fucking do it again."
"Hey, when were you negative?" Angel asked.
"I just never said anything, trying to be Miss Positive." She sniffled as she felt Buffy hug her close and say, "I'm just glad we're both here, right now."
Buffy and Darla held each other for a few moments and shared a few tears, deepening the bond they already had. Buffy knew at this moment she'd never be alone and if she chose to stay here in Sunnydale these people would have her back.
"I think I'd better let Angel have a few moments or he's going to get all broody and pout." Darla said as she calmed herself.
Hey I don't brood or pout." Angel denied with an affronted tone.
Darla gave Buffy a wink as she then called him on it by saying, "And what do you call that look baby, the broody manly look."
Angel mock glared at the two women as his girlfriend stepped away so he could come up and hug his adopted sister. "You scared me little one."
"I'm sorry." She apologized and squealed when he lifted her up and gave her a bear hug.
"I'm the sorriest, because I wasn't there to protect you like I promised myself I would. I love you brat, and I never want to lose you." Angel told her as he turned to face the blonde male he knew was going to be around more often now. "And if you know what's good for you, you better never break her heart."
Spike nodded, with a smirk on his face, seeing the teasing on Angel's face mixed with a serious look as well. He knew he'd been warned as well as officially brought into the circle that was Buffy's extended family. "I will do everything in my power to make her happy and keep you from crowding me like a caveman."
Angel chuckled as he let Buffy down and said to her, "I might get to like him, someday."
I think you're too late, 'cause I think you already do," Buffy called him on it, "Or you wouldn't let him near me."
"You're right on that, little one." Angel agreed as he extended his hand toward Spike and said, "Welcome to the family."
Spike nodded as he took the hand and replied, "It's an honor and a privilege."
Faith stepped up and pushed her brother out of the way saying, "Move over hug hog."
Buffy smiled as Faith turned to face her and say, "Bitch, you ever scare me like that again and I will kick your sorry ass and lock you in the attic."
Buffy started crying as she and her best friend hugged and cried. She knew Faith was not one to demonstrate affection much and this was a big moment for both of them. Deep down she knew this woman would be her best friend for life, would be her maid of honor at her wedding, and the god mother to her children. Faith would be the sister in her heart and she'd be able to share everything with her and know it would be held sacred.
"I love you Faith, forever and always you will be my best friend and sister of my heart." Buffy told her as they held tight to each other. "I love you too, 'B'."
Angel, Darla, and Lorne took that time to quietly leave, having Ethan walk them out. They knew Buffy needed to rest, and after an emotional reunion she was going to be even more tired than when she first walked in the house. Spike decided now would be a good time to get something to drink and let the girls have their privacy.
*******
Joyce turned to Hank once they entered the kitchen. "Sit while I warm up the milk. Get your thoughts together and then tell me what happened after I left you and Dru with Dr. Rayne."
"Joyce, do we have to go into this tonight? Can we approach this later, when we've rested and can think with clearer minds?"
"Oh, now we become all let's think this out?" She sighed with an edge to her voice she'd never used with him before.
"Joyce, we've both reacted badly in this. I just don't want to make the same mistake twice." Hank pleaded. "I'm beat and scared and have no clue how to even talk about this. A part of me says Dru was wrong in her assumptions, and was using it as an excuse for her behavior. Another part of me says she truly believes what she said and acted on her fear and need to be loved and accepted. She truly thought she would've been rejected and kicked out."
"Are you telling me she told you she was the one that left Dawn alone that night, and not Buffy." Joyce asked, feeling bewildered the girl would've done such a thing.
"If you'd only seen her face, Joyce; seen the pain and heard it in her voice as she told me why she didn't say anything." Hank replied as he rested his head in his hands on the table.
Joyce never seen her husband look so defeated and it scared her. Never had he looked so lost as he did right now. Even with Dawn's premature birth and fight for life, he'd never given up believing his little angel was going to be okay. Not even when Dawn died, did he look so disillusioned and ready to give up.
Joyce closed the refrigerator door and joined her husband at the table. Reaching over and placing her hand on his she asked, "Then tell me Hank! Tell me what she said."
Hank turned his hand over taking his wife's hand in his and started to tell her what had happened after she left. He left out nothing, including how he knew all of this was his fault.
He should not have let his pride of thinking he could take care of his family stop him from doing the right thing. He should've listened to the school's guidance counselor and found out more about Dru's past He should never had turned his back on Buffy and took out all his pain on her. Realizing now he should've accepted the help Dr. Rayne had offered right after Dawn had died.
"We'll make sure to call this Jenny Carpenter first thing today then." Joyce assured him, "I promise Hank we won't fail both of them again."
"Joyce I will understand if you don't want to help me with Dru. Buffy might hate us because of it, and I really don't want that to happen. But I can't let Dru handle this alone. I've blindly turned my back on her, on both of them already."
"Hank Summers, look me in the eyes." Joyce demanded and about cried at the pain she saw reflected back at her. "We are a family and it's about time we acted like one. We will face this together and we will overcome all of it. And you know why? Because we have each other and we have friends and others that will help us. We won't stop trying to bring this family back together."
Hank started to cry, knowing it would all end when she found out about his transgressions against her. But now was not the time for him to come forth and tell her how he'd become so separated from his family he acted upon it. What started as a drunken night of comfort with his secretary had turned into an affair he regretted terribly.
Joyce became worried when Hank began to sob frantically and realized this was the first time she'd ever seen him cry. He never shed a tear when Dawn was fighting for her life right after she was born. Not once did he cry after their youngest daughter's death. Hank had stood so stoic at the funeral never letting his emotions control him. Now it looked like the painful emotions he'd bottled up was now crashing down all around him at once as the grief poured off of him as she too began to cry. She stood and moved over so she could hold him as he cried. He pulled her on to his lap, hugging her close as he as if she was his life line.
"Joyce, please forgive me for tearing this family apart." He begged.
"Oh, Hank. I'm as much at fault as you." Joyce assured him.
"No, you're not." Hank disagreed, but he was not ready to tell her just how much damage he'd done to their marriage and to their family life.
*******
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Hello old friends. RL, computer issues and then modem issues had kept me off the internet......for those you have not lost interest here is more of the story and thank you for the continued interest and support.