Chapter three
Los Angeles, present time
Buffy checked for the umpteenth time that she had everything she needed. The plane ticket was in her purse along with her wallet. She had packed enough clothes for several months, even though she was only staying three weeks. In her hand luggage she had her portable CD player and some CDs as well as a book by her favorite author. She was all set.
Then why wasn’t she walking out that door?
She, of course, knew the answer to that, even if she didn’t want to admit it to herself. The thought of possibly seeing him in a few hours scared her. She was afraid that seeing him would bring back all the pain again, and she had managed to mostly put it behind her. She was also afraid that he would avoid her completely.
But most of all she was afraid that she wasn’t over him after all.
Buffy leaned against the wall in the hallway of her apartment. She had a few minutes before her cab would get there.
Of course she was over him. Wasn’t she? If she was to be brutally honest with herself, which she seldom was, she didn’t know. She hadn’t seen him since she had left Sunnydale, so she didn’t know how she’d react to seeing him again.
Sure, she had dated other guys. But there had never been any real sparkage. Not like it had been with him.
If she closed her eyes she could still remember every detail of their very first date.
Sunnydale, 1997
It was October 31st and that night there was a Halloween party at the Bronze. Spike had been a permanent addition to Buffy’s gang of friends for almost two months now, having been accepted by Willow and Anya immediately. Xander had taken a little more time, but was starting to come around. Buffy had been a little suspicious around him for the first few weeks, but he had turned into a good friend. Buffy thought that she had been over the crush she had had on him when she first came to Sunnydale, since he had spent their entire junior year ignoring her. Having him in her presence every day like she had for the past two months had awakened some of the feelings again, however.
And now he had finally asked her out, to the party. Sure, they would be going with Xander, Anya, Willow and her boyfriend, Oz, but it was still an official date. Which meant butterflies in a major quantity.
Buffy, Willow and Anya were getting ready at Buffy’s place. They had gone shopping for costumes together, and the guys had no idea what they were to expect.
“Does this look right?” Anya asked, turning to face Willow and Buffy. She was wearing a short top and tight shorts, along with roller blades.
“It looks fine... what are you supposed to be again?” Willow asked, peeking her head through the bathroom door.
“A Charlie’s Angel, isn’t it obvious?” Anya eyed her costume suspiciously.
“Sure it is.” Buffy said, not wanting to send Anya into a fit of hysteria. “Is mine OK?”
“It looks great Buffy.” Anya said, looking Buffy’s costume over. “Don’t forget the cape, though.”
“I won’t.” Buffy said, putting the red cape on. She was wearing an adult version of a Little Red Riding Hood costume.
“OK, I’m done.” Willow announced, coming out of the bathroom. “Do I look OK?”
“Wow, that’s one sexy witch.” Anya announced, causing Willow to go bright red. She was wearing a short, black skirt, black fishnet stockings and a tight, black top. Of course, to top it off, she also had a black, pointy hat.
“It’s not too much?” She pulled on the skirt, trying to make it longer.
“Oz is gonna have a fit.” Buffy assured her.
“I think they all will.” Willow said, looking at her friends’ costumes. “We are hot!”
“We sure are.” Anya agreed, just as the doorbell sounded. “Let’s go get out men.”
The three girls went downstairs where Buffy’s mom had let the guys in. Xander had dressed up as a soldier, Spike as a vampire and Oz... Buffy wasn’t sure what he was supposed to be, he was wearing a white t-shirt that had the word GOD on it.
Willow and Anya went up to their respective boyfriends and Buffy nervously approached Spike. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all.
“Hey.” She greeted, doing her best not to avoid his eyes. She didn’t have that much experience in the dating area. Or, actually, any experience at all.
“Hey yourself.” Spike replied, eyeing her costume. “Like your outfit.”
“Really?” Buffy asked, self-consciously fingering the hem of the red cape. “Yours looks good too.”
“Thanks, pet.” Spike gave her a smile. “Oh, I brought you these.” He continued, pulling a bouquet of pink roses from behind his back.
“They’re beautiful, thank you.” Buffy accepted the roses and inhaled their scent. “Mom, could you put these in some water?” She handed the bouquet to her mother, who had so far been standing quiet in the hallway.
“Sure, honey. You kids have fun tonight, OK?” Joyce gave Buffy a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t stay out too late, and be home by lunch tomorrow.” Buffy and Anya were spending the night at Willow’s place.
“OK, mom, see you tomorrow.” Buffy said before the group left the house. Buffy and Spike trailed a little behind the others. “Hey, what’s Oz supposed to be?” Buffy asked when they walked down the porch steps.
“God.” Spike answered. “Didn’t you see his t-shirt?” Buffy laughed and they followed the others down the street.
Since the Bronze was only five minutes from Buffy’s house, they walked there. When they entered the old warehouse, they all looked around in astonishment.
“This place looks so different.” Willow said, and the others agreed. There pumpkin lanterns everywhere, and spider web covered the walls, tables and chairs.
“They really went all out.” Xander said. There were a lot of people there, some dancing but most of them just sitting at tables, talking. Buffy spotted a free table, and they hurried over.
They spent the rest of the night talking, laughing and dancing. It was almost two o’clock, and the club would close in a few minutes, when the band started a slow song. Willow and Oz and Xander and Anya went to dance, and Buffy looked down at the floor. The night had been very similar to every other night the six of them had spent together, and she was starting to think that maybe she had read too much into him asking her to come.
“Want to dance?” Buffy looked up. Spike was standing in front of her, holding his hand out to her. She took it, and they walked toward the dance floor.
“Hey, Buffy, right?” Buffy stopped and turned against the voice.
“Hi Angel.” She replied, seeing her next door neighbor standing there.
“You having a good time?” He asked and she nodded.
“Yeah, sure.” Why was he talking to her? In the year they had lived next door to each other they hadn’t exchanged as much as a hello.
“I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to dance.” Angel said, looking at her expectantly.
“Sorry, Angel, I’m here with Spike.” Buffy explained. Angel looked at Spike, who was standing behind Buffy, seemingly just noticing him.
“Oh, right, sorry.” He said, turning to leave. “I guess I’ll see you around?” He walked away, and Buffy and Spike continued onto the dance floor.
As the first words of the song floated into the air, Spike wrapped his arms around Buffy and she rested her cheek on his shoulder.
This romeo is bleeding
But you can’t see his blood
It’s nothing but some feelings
That this old dog kicked up
It's been raining since you left me
Now I’m drowning in the flood
You see I’ve always been a fighter
But without you I give up
Now I can't sing a love song
Like the way it's meant to be
Well, I guess I'm not that good anymore
But baby, that's just me
Buffy closed her eyes and let the sensations wash over her. The music, the feeling of Spike’s body so close to hers, his arms around her. She felt like she was walking on clouds.
And I will love you, baby - Always
And I’ll be there forever and a day - Always
I’ll be there till the stars don’t shine
Till the heavens burst and
The words don’t rhyme
And I know when I die, you’ll be on my mind
And I’ll love you - Always
Buffy felt one of Spike’s hands travel up her body to tangle in her hair. She pulled back a little so she could look at him. Their eyes met and she saw that his were filled with as much emotion as she knew hers must be.
Now your pictures that you left behind
Are just memories of a different life
Some that made us laugh, some that made us cry
One that made you have to say goodbye
What I’d give to run my fingers through your hair
To touch your lips, to hold you near
When you say your prayers try to understand
I’ve made mistakes, I’m just a man
They stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like an eternity, until Buffy reached up and captured his lips with hers. He seemed surprised for a moment, but then returned the kiss, pulling her closer.
When he holds you close, when he pulls you near
When he says the words you’ve been needing to hear
I’ll wish I was him ‘cause those words are mine
To say to you till the end of time
Yeah, I will love you baby - Always
And I’ll be there forever and a day - Always
Everything around them seemed to disappear as the kiss deepened. Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike’s neck and pressed herself as close to him as she could. He moaned into her mouth, his hands falling down to her waist to hold her tighter.
If you told me to cry for you
I could
If you told me to die for you
I would
Take a look at my face
There’s no price I won’t pay
To say these words to you
Well, there ain’t no luck
In these loaded dice
But baby if you give me just one more try
We can pack up our old dreams
And our old lives
We’ll find a place where the sun still shines
They were hardly moving to the music any more, and both of them were ignorant to the attention they were getting from the rest of the people on and off the dance floor. All that existed was the two of them. If they had been a little more aware of their surroundings, they may have noticed the couple who were standing in a corner, whispering to each other and pointing to the couple on the dance floor.
And I will love you, baby - Always
And I’ll be there forever and a day - Always
I’ll be there till the stars don’t shine
Till the heavens burst and
The words don’t rhyme
And I know when I die, you’ll be on my mind
And I’ll love you - Always
They didn’t notice that the music had stopped until someone patted Buffy on the shoulder. She reluctantly pulled back and noticed that the lights were on and everyone was leaving.
“Don’t you guys need to breath?” Xander asked, making Buffy blush.
“Leave her alone, Whelp.” Spike said, putting his arm around Buffy’s shoulder and guided her toward the exit, the others following behind them.
Los Angeles, present time
A car horn pulled Buffy out of her daydream, and she looked out the window to see a cab on the street. She grabbed her bags and headed downstairs where the cab driver put her suitcases in the trunk while she got in the car.
She leaned back in the seat and ran a finger over her lower lip. She could still feel his lips against hers, even after all these years.
She remembered how she, Willow and Anya had spent almost the entire night gossiping about the guys. She had been so excited to finally have a boyfriend, so happy. If only she had know then what she knew now... she still would have done the exact same thing, she realized. She didn’t want to have anything undone, even now, knowing the pain he had caused her.
AN: The song in this chapter is ‘Always’ by Bon Jovi, which has also given its name to the whole story.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Sorry about the delay in updates (on all my fics, really). I've been busy with other stuff, like moving. I'm gonna try to update more often. Hope you like this chap, and reviews are always a good motivator :-)
Don't own the characters, as always
Don't own the characters, as always