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Thanks to those of you who reviewed the last chapter!
Chapter 2



Dawn and Tara were up late watching cartoons, wondering where Willow and Buffy had gone. Dawn kept looking out the window, her hands fidgety from worry. Tara did her best to soothe her, but her own fears weakened her attempts. She was about to reach over and grasp Dawn’s hands when the brunette jumped up and ran to the door.

"Spike, what happened?" Dawn looked her sister over, looking for the wound that had caused her sister’s unconscious state. "Is she okay?"

"She’s fine. Just exhausted. She... um…" He noticed Tara standing up to look at Buffy. "She’s had a rough night. I’m going to go put her to bed." He pushed past Dawn, and practically ran up the stairs to Buffy’s room.

When he’d opened the door and lain her down on the bed, he breathed a sigh. She was safe now. He had been so frightened that some demon would take advantage of them while he was bringing her home. It was a great relief to see her in her home, protected from the danger of her life, so that she could sleep peacefully.

He unzipped her boots, and gently pulled them from her ankles. Opening the drawer that he knew from the previous year’s stalking to be filled with pajamas, he pulled out a pair of shorts for her to wear. He walked over to her still form, looking so much like death that he had to swallow the lump in his throat, threatening to choke him. Pushing those thoughts aside, he focused on getting her changed.

He slowly slid the shorts over her legs, under the leather skirt she had worn for the night until he reached her hips. He was surprised that the lust he expected to consume him from unzipping her skirt was completely nonexistent. He lifted her hips gently, pulling the shorts up and the skirt down. He untied the wraparound blouse, leaving the camisole underneath for a nightshirt. Tossing the removed clothes aside, he pulled the clip out of her long hair and set it on the nightstand.

"Love, you’ll get better. Sleep tonight. Give yourself some time to forget. I’ll be here tomorrow whether you want me or not, and we’ll talk about what happened last night… whether you want to or not." He lifted her one more time, pulling the blankets down and settling her underneath them. Tucking her into a secure cocoon, he leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "Goodnight, my love."

~*~*~*~*~

"Dawn." Spike greeted her as he stepped into the kitchen. He smelled the hot chocolate Dawn was drinking, noticing the hot teapot, cocoa packets and marshmallows on the island. He looked over at the woman turning off the stove. "Tara, thanks for staying with Dawn. Slayer’s all right, just resting, so you can go on home. I’ll stay here tonight. Keep the beasties away."

The wicca nodded and hugged Dawn before leaving through the front door.

"Tara’s still a little tense about seeing Willow, I guess." Dawn mumbled. Then her face grew solemn, and she asked, "How is she really?"

"Asleep. Hopefully for the rest of the night." Spike sat next to her smiling slightly at the hot cup of cocoa sitting in front of him. He looked to his right, seeing Dawn’s concerned expression.

"We… me and your sis… we had a fight tonight. I don’t know when she finds out I told you this whether she’ll kill me or not, but I found out a couple nights ago that the chip doesn’t work on Buffy."

Dawn, who was about to drink a sip of her warm drink, froze and looked over at him. "She didn’t hurt you, did she?"

Spike looked confused and amused all at once. "Isn’t that question a little bit backward, nib?"

"What? No, I know you wouldn’t actually hurt her… other than maybe a couple punches for payback. But, I don’t know what she’d do to you." They shared a moment before he took a deep breath.

"She didn’t hurt me. She wanted me to hurt her." He rubbed his face with his hands. "She wouldn’t want you to know. She’d want to protect you from the seriousness of what she’s going through, but, I think you need to know. I think that you can help me with what I am trying to do for her."

"Spike… talk to me. What’s going on?"

"Buffy’s been sort of… numb since she came back." Spike began. "She’s been feeling like she can’t feel anything, and it’s chipping at her soul."

"Why doesn’t she just tell someone?" Dawn questioned. "You or me… or even Tara. We’d understand."

"Tara’s part of the group of us that brought her back. Buffy can’t talk to her. She’s also connected to the group that Buffy is trying so hard to improve for. She can’t talk to any of them, Giles left her high and dry, she’s trying to protect you, and I’m her enemy. That’s why she’s bottled it all up. Tonight, the bottle burst."

"So, my sister has become an emotional time-bomb because she has no emotions. She either can’t or won’t talk about it, she tried to take it out on you tonight, and you think you can help her… how?"

"By letting her be depressed. We need to make it obvious to her that she’s allowed to feel hollow, even when we’re around. Niblet, we’ve got to show her that she doesn’t have to be strong for us. Do you understand what that calls for?"

"Well, duh. I’m not some stupid little girl. It means that if she doesn’t want to stick around to hang out, we let her go."

"No, we don’t let her go. We make her stay with us, but we let her be. It has to be so that she won’t feel rushed or like she has to force a smile on just because we’re around." Spike finished his hot cocoa, and put both empty mugs in the sink. "We are going to be strong for her."

Dawn looked down. "But what if she doesn’t want us around?"

"Then we let her be alone. But you have to understand that it’s not you that she’s hiding from. She’s hiding from her own feelings. Getting emotions after being numb for so long it’s... hard. You and I both went through it after… after what happened at the tower." Spike shook his head shoving the memories aside. "We just need to be there, but not imposing or pushing. Everyone wants to help, bit, but she has to want it, first."

Spike stopped talking when he heard a clunk come from Buffy’s room, followed by her screams. He rushed upstairs and burst through the door. "Buffy?!"

She was flailing about, crying and gasping. Her arms seemed to be clawing at the air as she kicked out legs that were seemingly tangled in the blanket. He ran over to her and grabbed her shoulders, whispering, "Buffy… Buffy, it’s okay. You’re dreaming. Wake up, pet."

She choked on a sob, and her tear-filled eyes flew open, grabbing for the first solid object she could. Spike was pulled onto the bed, being held onto by a panicking slayer. He enveloped her in his embrace when he felt her tears soak through his shirt.

"Shhh… baby… Buffy, it’s okay. It’s gonna be alright. ‘S just a dream, pet. You’re awake now…"

She looked up. "Spike? God… Spike… I was back in the coffin. I couldn’t breathe and I couldn’t get out. Oh god…" Buffy tucked her head under his chin to let her tears fall silently as she recovered from the nightmare.

Spike looked at the door, seeing Dawn with concerned eyes. "Go fetch your sister a glass of water. Then, I think you’d better get into your PJ’s and stay in here tonight."

After Dawn left, Spike focused back on Buffy. He stroked her hair with one hand, her back with the other, murmuring to her that it was okay. She wasn’t alone.

By the time Dawn had returned, Buffy was sitting up against the headboard, her head on Spike’s shoulder. Dawn couldn’t help the smile that came to her face. She’d known that Buffy never hated Spike, and she’d hoped that one day the Slayer would give the vampire a chance. Seeing them all snuggly like that made her want to squeal with delight. But she remembered what Spike had said, and she decided not to push. She calmly walked in and sat next to Buffy on the side that Spike wasn’t one. She handed her sister the glass of water and watched as she took a few drinks.

"You feeling any better?" Dawn asked quietly. Buffy looked over at her and smiled.

"Yeah. It was pretty bad, but I’m better now. Thanks."

Dawn picked at her pajama bottoms covered in different colored hearts, questioning herself on whether or not she should ask. She decided that she should, and if Buffy didn’t want to, then at least she’d asked. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Buffy looked at her sister and shook her head. "I just want to forget about it and try to get back to sleep."

Spike took that as his cue to leave the room. Just as he was about to walk through the doorway, Buffy’s voice stopped him.

"Spike, thank you. For tonight." She looked down, ashamed of how she had acted. "Maybe we can… talk about it sometime?"

He felt like singing. She actually wanted to acknowledge what had happened.

"Of course, love. I’ll be here in the mornin’ if you wanna get some sleep."

"Okay."

"Goodnight, love. Sleep well, yeah?" She smiled a little, and he left the room.

"Do you want to talk about that?" Dawn smirked.

Buffy looked confused. "What?"

"Oh, come on, Buffy! You totally like him! I saw the way you looked at him." Dawn giggled when her sister rolled her eyes good-naturedly.

"I do not. He was just… nice to me tonight and I decided to return the favor for once. That’s all," she denied firmly.

Dawn raised her eyebrows. "Okay… no need to get defensive. I’m just saying it would be cool if you guys got together. And it’s not like Spike would reject you if you wanted to be with him… he loves you."

Buffy frowned. Earlier that night, she had been unable to feel anything but the despair of being alive and the obligations weighing her down once more. Now, she was feeling sorry. She felt sorry for trying to use Spike. And, even if she didn’t feel anything else, she knew that she should apologize… or try to explain… or something. She wasn’t sure if that meant, if she had the ability, that she felt something for the vampire. She tried to remember what if felt like to be in love… or even like… but all of the pushing, combined with her earlier outburst, had left her exhausted. She lay back down, rolling away from Dawn, begging off for the night.

"Tired," was all she said before falling asleep again.

Dawn set the glass of water down, and lay down, too. Buffy felt something for Spike. She knew it. It had been in her eyes before, a certain twinkle that was only there when she looked at him. It wasn’t gratitude for whatever had happened that night. It was something that was being hindered, but not destroyed. If Dawn could only get her walls to crumble, then maybe Buffy would realize that she was in love with Spike.

~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Two chapters to go! Have you reviewed, yet? :P





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