Chapter 6 – Breaking Hearts



Spike took a swig of his whiskey as he looked around his new home. He smiled, happy with himself. He turned a full circle, taking another swig from the bottle for happily falling on his bed. Sun rise was just around the corner and finding himself pleased, he decided to give himself a well needed nap. He smiled, setting the bottle on his nightstand while he stripped himself of his clothes, climbing into bed happily. He hugged the pillow to him, a smug smile upon his face. He then pulled out a small pink shirt, taking it to his nose, smelling the sweet aroma that came off of it in luscious waves. “Slayer,” he growled, smelling the shirt again.

Buffy giggled as she watched him, growling her name, sniffing her shirt. But he giggled soon stopped as he rolled onto his back, sporting little Spike as he did. Her eyes opened wide as she slapped her hand over her mouth. “Bloody Hell Slayer,” he growled his hips bucking up. “Bloody tight.” Her eyes widened even more and she stumbled backwards, hitting a table. She gasped, turning around to stable it. When she turned back around, she was greeted with a smirking Spike. He titled his head to the left and cocked up a scarred eyebrow. “Slayer?”

“Sp-spi-spike,” she stumbled willing her heart to slow down for there was no doubt that he heard it. He smiled standing up. Buffy turned around, putting her hand over her eyes. “Spike!” she squealed, forcing herself not to turn around and peek. “Please! Cover yourself up.” Spike smiled sauntering over to her quietly before standing in front of her.

“Ok Slayer. All covered!” he lied. She opened her eyes to find Spike standing in front of her. She quickly turned around when she realized he had been lying. “Come on slayer. I know you wanna peek.” Buffy felt herself turn a shade of fuchsia. She shook her head, keeping her head down as she turned around. Her head snapped up immediately after realizing what she had been looking at. He smiled as she began to babble, sorry slipping out of her red lips every other word. “I told ya you wanted a peek.” Buffy looked at him, her eyebrows creased. Before he could stop her, her fist connected with his nose. He stumbled back, pinching his bleeding nose and he held his head back. “Bloody Hell Slayer. It’s called a joke!” Buffy rolled her eyes and walked over to him. “No. You stay right there. Don’t come bloody near me. Just stay,” he said, holding his hand out as if to block her.

“Spike, I’m sorry ok? I just, it’s just, you’re my enemy and these past few days have been really confusing,” she sighed, jutting out her lower lip. Spike suppressed a groan turning around. Buffy looked at him confused. “Spike? What’s the matter?” Spike growled deep in his throat. It was hard trying to keep control. Not only was she making him hard but with the smell of blood in the air, he thought he was about to go off the edge. “Spike? Face me before I make you.”

“Oh yea slayer, that’ll get me,” he growled, pushing his erection down which only made him groan at the contact. Buffy was startled and soon her heart began to beat at a fast past again. “Slayer, I think you should leave.”

“But Spike, I um, I need to ask you something.” Spike sighed, rolling his head back and forth in frustration.

“You’re killing me love.” Buffy raised an eyebrow in confusion. Spike turned around, his erection in plain view. Buffy’s lips formed the shape of and ‘o’ as she looked at it for a few moments. “Love? See something you like?” he asked, his lips forming in a smirk. Buffy looked up at him, blushing again. She turned away from him, not wanting to look him in the eye. “Pet, are you gonna tell me why your ‘ere?” Buffy nodded her head vigorously. “Well? What is it?” Buffy took a deep breath and turned towards him.

“IthinkImightlikeyouandIwaswonderingifyoulikedmelikeIlikeyou,” Buffy asked in one breath. Spike smirked again, titling his head to the side as he raised his scarred eyebrow.

“Need you to say it a little bit slower pet,” Spike said, already knowing what she had asked.

“I said I think I might like you and I was wondering if you liked me like I like you.” She said, letting out a long breath before falling onto his bed.

“Well. I don’t want to kill you anymore.” Buffy sighed and smiled intently at him. “But don’t get your ‘opes up yet pet. I’m still the big bad.”

“Oh yea. You are the big bad. Definitely big bad. No one is bigger or badder than you,” Buffy said before clamping her hand over her mouth. “That sounded a lot better in my head.” Spike chuckled before sitting next to her, legs spread, his hard cock sticking up. “Um, Spike? Could you please?” Buffy asked, motioning to the sheets on the bed. He chuckled yet again, pulling the whites sheets over his waist.

“Better?” Buffy smiled leaning in and placing a small kiss on his lips. When she pulled away she smiled even more as she looked at Spike. His eyes looked like they were about to pop out of their sockets. His mouth kept opening and closing as if he was going to say something but nothing came out. Buffy giggled, leaning in to kiss him again. This time, he responded, pulling her towards him to get a little closer. She was surprised at first but she soon melted into him. She felt his tongue trace her bottom lip, begging for entrance. She parted her lips, letting his tongue slip in, running along the roof of her mouth before dancing in tangles with her tongue. She was surprised at herself when a small moan escaped her lips causing Spike to smile into the kiss. He ran his hands through her hair before cupping her cheeks and pulling her closer to him. She scooted closer, fumbling a little while breaking the kiss. She groaned inwardly at her clumsiness but Spike looked at her with wonder. He was sure that within five minuets she would regain her conciseness and run out of his crypt before punching him in the nose again. But he was surprised to find that she only moved closer to him, settling herself on his lap before pressing her lips against his again. He smiled inwardly to himself as this time it was her tongue to sweep against his bottom lip. Soon her tongue had slipped in between his parted lips. Spike cupped her cheek with his left hand while he pulled her closer to him with his right, loving the feel of her body pressed up flush against his. Buffy automatically wrapped her legs around her waist, letting her hands run through his bleached curls.

Buffy pulled away after the breath issue finally made its way to surface. She looked at Spike to find him breathing heavily, looking at her with intense blue eyes. He traced her face with his finger, tracing her nose, her cheeks, to her swollen lips. He brushed a stray lock behind her ear, smiling at her beauty.

Buffy shook her head, untangling herself from him while leaping up from the bed. “I’m sorry but I have to go.” Spike stood reaching for her.

“Buffy.”

“No, you just stay here. I have to go. I have to leave. I have to call Willow,” she said, shaking from head to toe. Spike stepped towards her, touching her with his fingertips. She flinched and stepped back. He shook his head.

“Should ‘ave known,” he mumbled rolling his eyes. She looked up at him, confused. “What? I thought this was going to ‘appen Buffy. I knew that within a couple of minuets, you’d remember your brain and high tale out of here.”

“Can you blame me? Spike, how is this going to work? All last year you wanted to kill me and my friends and now you want all kisses?” Spike raised an eyebrow, before growling deep in his throat.

“You were the one who kissed me slayer.”

“I know and I’m really disgusted with myself and you shouldn’t have been responding! Damn you Spike!”

“Damn me? Come on Buffy. You think anyone could resist those red lips of yours?” Spike smirked walking closer to her. She backed up franticly until she found herself up against a wall. Spike leaned in, his chest brushing up against her.

“Giles can! Angel can! Willow and Xander can! Many people can! You Spike can’t. You need to learn to keep yourself under control.” Spike smirked.

“You know I can’t do that around you.” Buffy’s breath caught her in her throat as she felt Spike nudge her legs with his leg while running his hand slowly up her skirt clad leg. Buffy placed her hand on his chest as if to push him back at first but only to then trace circles on it. “Buffy,” he breathed, taking in the scent of her.

“No, no this- this is wrong. I can’t do this.” Spike pushed himself of the wall and moved over to his bed. Picking up the bottle of whiskey he had left on the nightstand, he took a long swig. He looked over to see Buffy standing there.

“Buffy, just get out.” Buffy walked over to him, touching his shoulder to pull him around. He looked at her, his blue eyes piercing, shinning with unshed tears. “Buffy, please. If I can’t have you…Buffy, did you feel something? Anything at all?”

Buffy paused, not sure at what to say. She wanted to be with him, everything in her body was screaming at her to be with him but she knew it wouldn’t work. She knew that one day he would go back to being evil and she’d find everyone around her dead. She looked up at him. “No. I didn’t feel anything.” Spike took another swig before throwing it at a wall. The sound of the glass shattering startled her.

“That’s bull shit slayer. You and I both bloody well know it. Why does the thought of you and me… forget it. Just get out. I’ll be gone by sun down ok? That way you can go frolic with your Angel with a bloody soul.” Spike began to put on his clothes while Buffy stood angry behind him.

“That’s not fair Spike.”

“Then what is? What wrong with you and me? Red didn’t find anything wrong with it. Your mum didn’t find anything wrong with it.” Spike spat, pulling his black t-shirt over his head. Buffy missed the pale skin that was now covered.

“My mom doesn’t know you’re a vampire. Willow does find something wrong with it. And you’re a vampire. I’m the slayer. It could never work.” Buffy turned to leave but stopped when Spike let out a forced laugh.

“That’s great pet. Tell me Buffy, what’s Angel?” Buffy crossed her arms over her chest.

“I’m not listening to this.” She turned around ready to leave again. She began to climb up the ladder to get out of the bedroom but a strong hand pulled her back.

“Yes you are. Angel is a vampire. One with a soul. One that he didn’t ask for, one that he was cursed with. If Angel ever lost his soul again, you and I both know what would happen. He would ruin your life and my undead one. Angel is just a cover for Angelus. Angelus is still in there. But Buffy, this is me. Spike without a soul, willing to give up the killing, the maiming. I don’t need a soul to force the monster down. I don’t need to worry about losing anything because I’ve got nothing to lose.” He held her by the shoulders, starring into her green eyes. “If I can’t prove this to you, than what am I worth?” He stepped back, letting her go. Tears welled up in his eyes but he forced them back. He took a deep breath. “If I’m not good enough for you, than what is the point of me living anymore? If you leave, please,” he paused, going down on his knees. “Stake me.” Buffy shook her head, climbing the ladder and running out of the crypt, leaving Spike alone with his broken heart.



The End





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