Disclaimer : Joss Whedon owns the characters. Atleast most of them. I’m continuing the story which didn’t end when he finished. Just want to have an ending.
Buffy wakes up screaming “Spike”…
Her scream could have been heard all around Hyperion. It disturbed a lot of slayers who were training or doing their casual jobs. Everyone thought it was a demon attack and ran to Buffy’s room. Faith heard the scream too and she rushed in to see what happened. But before anyone could reach the room, Willow was the first one to find Buffy.
Willow woke up by Buffy’s scream. She thought it was a nightmare and she ran to Buffy’s room. She was the closest and she found Buffy curling herself in the bed trying to avoid the shivering but unable to do so. Her whole body was shaking from the dream. Willow was instantly by Buffy’s side holding onto her tightly. She was trying to calm Buffy but failing miserably.
“It’s ok Buffy. Everything is fine. You are safe.” Willow tried to soothe Buffy by her calm voice. But Buffy was nothing but calm.
“No it’s not. He’s dead. He’s gone. There is nothing fine with that. I’m not safe at all. Not without him” She screamed at Willow who took a step back from the sudden blast from Buffy. It has been almost a year so far and Buffy seemed to have moved on from Spike. Everyone saw Buffy happy with Immortal. Everyone thought she was having a happy satisfied life. Nobody suspected anything other than happiness in her life. Of course Willow has been out of contact for a while and it was not like it used to be. Everyone have their own separate lives now and they barely see each other regularly. But Buffy’s reaction to Spike’s death after a year was a surprise to Willow.
Then only Willow noticed a bunch of slayers running down the corridor to Buffy’s room ready to attack. Willow quickly went to the doorstep and stopped them from entering.
“It’s ok. Everything is fine. She had a bad dream. You can go back to what you were doing now.” Willow sent everyone away.
Faith hesitated before moving. She thought it would be better if Willow who was Buffy’s friend comforting her than herself.
Willow went back to Buffy. “Tell me what happened.” Willow asked Buffy.
Buffy started to tell Willow about her dream. She told about the demon and Spike chained up and tortured. She felt the pain again that she saw on Spike’s face when she remembered her dream. Willow was listening carefully not interrupting. After Buffy finished, Willow came to a conclusion.
“It’s alright Buffy. It was just a bad dream. Spike cannot be tortured. He died saving the world. I think he would be in heaven right now showing his sarcasm to Angels. It must be a whole bunch of Angel versions up there brooding by now.” Willow said trying to humor the situation.
Buffy got a slight smile on the thought. “Ofcourse. He must be in heaven. He cannot go to…” she struggled to say the word ‘Hell’. “If anyone deserved to go down there, it must be me. I must go there for everything I did to him and put him through.” Buffy continued.
“No honey. Both of you deserve heaven. I’m sure he doesn’t blame you. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Willow said to Buffy trying to calm her down. But it just angered her more.
“I Didn’t Do Anything Wrong?” Buffy raised her voice. “I did everything wrong towards him. I used him, I hurt him, I caused him so much pain, and he didn’t even want to see me when he came back.” Buffy broke down when she said the last sentence and started to sob.
Willow looked confused. She didn’t know what Buffy was saying. She thought Buffy must be hallucinating because of her dream. She was worried what Buffy might do now in her current stage.
“Honey. What are you talking about?” Willow asked Buffy trying to make her realize what she was saying.
“He came back and he didn’t want me. He didn’t love me anymore.” Buffy was talking to herself while sobbing. She was trying to control her tears but it just seemed to flow.
“Ok Buffy. I don’t know what you are talking about but there is one thing I know for sure. He loved you very very much. He will not want you. I can guarantee that. I know if Tara came back, she will still love me. And I love her too. I will always love her.” Memories of Tara shook Willow emotionally too.
“But you didn’t hurt her. You didn’t make her reject your love. I hurt Spike so much he rejected my love. He didn’t want to be with me. That’s what he said before he died in Sunnydale and that’s why he didn’t come to me.” Buffy was crying harder now and fell back into the bed pushing her head into the pillow as much as she can.
Willow didn’t understand what was going on. She was lost in thoughts. She didn’t know what to do or how to get Buffy out of this trance. She thought of having a moment for herself to clear her mind. She decided to go downstairs to get something to drink and freshen up.
“Buffy… I’ll go downstairs and be back soon ok? I’m not leaving you. I’ll be back in a quick minute ok honey?” Buffy didn’t say anything so Willow decided to take that as a yes. She opened the door and went out down the stairs. Faith was downstairs talking to some slayers. When she saw Willow, she went to her.
“So how’s B?”
“Pretty shook up. Something must have reminded her of Spike. She had a bad nightmare and she is hallucinating now. She keeps on blabbering about Spike not loving her.” Willow said trying to make some sense to herself.
“The last time I saw Blondie, he was whipped in love with her. But who knows? One whole year may change a person’s feelings.” Faith said it but she wasn’t sure she believed it herself.
“Now what are You talking about? Spike has been dead for a whole year and Buffy has moved on. When we were in Sunnydale, before the final battle I saw the love Spike showed for Buffy. He was arguing with us for throwing her out of the house remember?” Willow said remembering the last moments with Spike. She always felt for Spike as Tara did. They didn’t believe he was really a bad evil demon. He was more human-like than other demons.
“I’m not talking about that year. I’m talking about last year.” Faith said not remembering Willow didn’t know about Spike.
“What are you talking about? Spike fell out of love with Buffy after turning into ashes?” Willow was lost in confusion.
“Oh. I’m sorry. You don’t know about Spike being alive do you? I mean he was dead but he was not ashes. He was here working with Angel.” Faith said clearing the confusions.
“WHAT?” Willow was shocked. She almost fainted when she heard Spike was alive. But she composed herself. Now everything made sense to her. She understood what Buffy was talking about when she said he didn’t love her anymore. She was confused as to why he didn’t try to see Buffy after coming alive.
“Then why didn’t he go meet Buffy? Why didn’t he come to us?” She asked Faith.
“That’s the million dollar question right now. As far as I know, he came back from the amulet to Angel as a ghost. He became corporeal six months ago. Then he joined Angel’s team to fight against evil. And he died again now in this battle.” Faith said with a bit of grief for Spike. She found him attractive when she met him but kept her distance from him. She knew it would hurt Buffy and she didn’t want to do anything like that. And then Spike died and she lit a candle for him in the church.
“And why didn’t he come to see Buffy?” Willow asked Faith still confused. She is trying to reason all the thoughts.
“I’m not sure. Angel said something about both of them going to Rome and seeing Buffy with Immortal. Both of them left without waiting. So basically that’s all I know.” Faith finished her story.
“Oh Dear.” Willow said with a shock. She couldn’t imagine what Spike must have felt like to see Buffy with Immortal. She remembered seeing Tara talking with another woman before and feeling jealousy. She decided to get the story straight and moved towards Angel’s room.
When she got to the room, she saw Angel sitting up on the bed looking at the rooftop of the room. She saw how beaten up he is. It seemed the blood has helped him heal but not quite enough. She felt sorry for him for a moment. ‘He has lost all his friends and family.’ She thought in her mind. But she remembered seeing Buffy broken and crying and that made her remember why she was there.
She went towards Angel. Angel sensed her long before and he said “Hey Willow” trying to be cheerful but failing. He didn’t look down but he nodded her to sit on the bed. Willow sat down thinking what she should say.
“Why didn’t you tell us?” She finally asked.
“I couldn’t. I don’t know why. Maybe it wasn’t my secret to reveal. Maybe I didn’t want him to go. I just don’t know the reason. I just didn’t.”
“I’m sorry for you. But that doesn’t make you the victim in this situation. You excuses are not worthy of any. You don’t know how much you have hurt Buffy.” Willow said feeling the anger inside her.
“Maybe she’s better off without him.” Angel said it without thinking. But that statement made Willow go off the wall and brought out all the anger inside her.
“Better off with who? You? Don’t you think if she wanted to be with you after he died, she would have done so after Sunnydale going down? Why would she move on to Immortal?” Willow said with her raised voice.
Thought of Immortal brought anger to Angel too. “She moved on didn’t she? That’s the point. She moved and she can move on again too.”
Willow looked at Angel with disgust. She got off the bed and moved away to the door. Before she left, she said her final words.
“I thought you had a good side in you. That’s why I kept on helping you every time you lost your soul. But now I have to wonder whether you really have a soul. And even if you do, I think it is not with goodness of heart. I personally think Spike without a soul had better concern than you with your soul. He cared for everyone and I would bet my life if the situation was reversed, he would have told Buffy about you regardless of his feelings.” Willow said it and left the room slamming the door behind her with force.
Angel stared at the door for a moment and got back to staring at the rooftop.
Willow went upstairs to Buffy. She found her holding onto her pillow still sobbing. Her tears have stopped probably from all the crying and she was mourning now. Willow felt terrible for Buffy. She didn’t know what she would have done if she was in Buffy’s place. Willow remembered herself trying to destroy the world when Tara died. Lucky for her, Xander was there to help her come over it. She knew she must be there for Buffy to help her through this.
She went and sat in the bed near to where Buffy had her head in the pillow. She started to softly caress Buffy’s head trying to calm her down. It calmed Buffy and the sobbing started to stop slowly. She felt Buffy’s body relax and then Buffy turned her head to look at Willow.
“Thanks Will” Buffy murmured with soft voice.
Willow heard it and she gave a slight smile. “We must be there for each other right?” Buffy nodded her head in agreement and placed her head onto Willow’s lap. She said to Willow in soft voice, “Next time I die, please don’t bring me back.” Willow was shocked by that statement but she knew Buffy’s state at the moment. So she decided to let it slip. She sat there while Buffy fell asleep with her head on Willow’s lap. And after Buffy falling into deep sleep, Willow pushed her head to the pillow and closed the door silently on her way out.
A/N : Touching moments. I would like to state right now that this is a SPUFFY story and not Willow/Buffy story. So don’t get any wrong ideas. :D They are best friends and best friends help each other on difficult situations. You will see how in the upcoming chapters. PLEASE REVIEW.
TBC
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks for your patience. Hope the story is interesting. More chapters coming up. Not enough reviews in the last chapter. Either people lost interest or didn't want to comment. Please say your opinion so that I can take comfort in it. Reviews are the payback for the authors so please do review.