“Damn it,” She muttered and yawned.

She found a blue button down shirt thrown over a chair, grabbed it and put it on. Oh, there’s my undies, she thought as she picked them up off the floor and pulled them on. She made her way to the bathroom, looking for some mouth wash. She found it under the sink, along with those small Dixie cups on top of the counter.

After she made sure she had decent breath, she went looking around the house for him. Kitchen? No. Living room? Nope, not there either. She made her way across the house to where his study was. She heard his voice. Ahh, jackpot. Buffy smiled and pushed open the door more, making her way inside.

“So, how does that sound with you? I think I have a shot, but I’m … I’m going to need your help with it. I think if I have it up and running, sooner rather than later it would …” Spike paused as he spun around in his chair after hearing the door creak. He stood and made his way toward her, giving her a kiss on the cheek, then went back to his conversation.

“What was I saying? Oh, yes …what? No! Liam, I’ve told you, it’s been two years, I’m clean.” Spike told Liam. “I’m sober and I’m not going to fuck up again.”

Spike covered his face with his hand, then pinched the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb, sighing. “Don’t do this to me Liam, we have history. I introduced you to Cordelia for Christ’s sake!”

Buffy decided she didn’t want to be around to hear this, and suspected that he didn’t want her there to hear him sounding so … needy. She turned to leave, but he caught her arm and brought her down on his lap, where he placed kisses on her shoulder. He moved his hand up her stomach to her breast and gave it a light squeeze then took it away.

“Thank you. Thank you Liam. Yes, I’ll come by on Monday. Thank you.” He hung up the phone and pulled her close to him.

“What was all that about?”

“That? Oh, just work. Or rather, hoping that it will be work. I think he’s interested in me working for him.”

“That’s great …Umm, doing what?” Buffy asked.

“Oh, web design,” Spike said as he brought both of his hands up to cover her shirt-clad breasts.

“Mmm, wearing my shirt love, seems you made yourself at home …” He kissed her neck and began to unbutton the shirt.

“Hey, hey … I’m hungry.” Buffy told him. “We can hanky panky later.”

Spike pouted against her neck, “Want you now …”

Buffy ground onto him whispering, “Down boy,” Then got up and faced him.

“You little tease. Down boy? You just woke him up more.” Spike grinned and stood as well, “Now he’s just going to follow you wherever you go …Hey, get back here!”

Buffy had taken off running, but didn’t get very far seeing as Spike caught up with her and pinned her against the wall in the hallway.

“Mmm, got you now, love,” Spike purred and captured her lips with his.

Buffy kissed him back while wrapping her arms around him. Spike pried her legs apart with one leg then stepped between them. He ran his hand up her leg, encountering her panties.

“Now, that just won’t do,” He informed her as he slowly pulled them down. Buffy tilted her head back and reached for his jeans. She undid the button, unzipped them, and then shoved them down. Spike placed his hands under her thighs and lifted her up, slipping inside of her.

“Fuck Buffy,” Spike moaned as he moved in and out of her slowly, enjoying the feel of her around him.

Buffy gasped as he brought his hand to the top of the shirt and ripped it down the middle, making buttons go everywhere. He began raining kisses on her neck and breasts.

Buffy wrapped her legs around him tighter and moved herself on him more, “Suck on them, please Spike, Oh mmm …please …” She pleaded. He didn’t hesitate. He placed his mouth on a nipple and suckled it.

She squeezed his cock and he moaned against her skin.

He separated himself from her breast, “Do it again,” and then brought the nipple back into his mouth, rolling his tongue around it, teasing it.

“Ahhh, I’m …” Buffy moaned.

“Mmm …”

Spike let go of her breast and placed his arms under hers, resting his hands on her shoulders, thrusting into her harder.

“Oh, that’s it! That! Oh!!!” Buffy screamed.

“Like …that …kitten?” Spike panted, moving his head back to watch her. Fucking gorgeous.

“Fucking gorgeous, Buffy. That’s what you are. So hot and tight, I swear you’re going to swallow me whole. I want you to, take me in…Take it all,” Spike groaned then drove into her faster.

“Ah, ah …Spike, I …Oh Spike I …Oh Fuck!!!!” Buffy screamed as she came. Spike shut his eyes tight as he started to come, then realized that they didn’t use a condom and pulled out of her, his come shooting onto her thigh, the rest of it anyway.

“Fuck!”

“Wha …Oh …Oh no.” Buffy breathed as she put her legs down. “Damnit!”

“Buffy …”

“No, I …what …how could I be so fucking stupid?”

“Not you love, me …I should have …”

Buffy stared at him.

“Don’t worry about it, I mean…Well, you know,” Buffy said then brought her finger in her mouth, licking what was there.

“What do you mean don’t worry about it? Are you on birth control?” Spike asked.

“Well …no, but …”

“No buts Buffy, I’m fucking thirty-four years old. I’m not having another kid.”

“Oh …well, what are the odds anyway? Don’t stand there and give yourself a heart attack.” Buffy bent over to pull her panties up as Spike buckled up his pants.

Buffy pulled the shirt over her, holding it together by her arms that were crossed in front of her.

“Are you saying that if I am … I have to … you know …?”

“Buffy …”

“No, I want to know.”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Let’s just pray that it doesn’t.” Spike said then made his way to the kitchen. “You said you were hungry right? What would you like?”

Buffy followed him, deciding to let it go. She wouldn’t be pregnant anyway.

She hoped.

Later that night, they were sitting on the couch, watching some sketch show. Buffy laughed and leaned in closer to him. Spike held her closer and tried to concentrate on the TV, her ... anything except the fact that she could be pregnant. He didn’t want to be a father again. He swore to himself after Winifred took Matthew away from him, that that was it. He was done. No more kids to bring into the world, just so they could be taken away from him. He couldn’t bring himself to go through that again. She’s only twenty; she’s going to want kids … Spike thought to himself. He closed his eyes already knowing that this new relationship was doomed. Might as well go ahead and talk about it. It was going to come up anyway. She must have been thinking the same thing when she tilted her head up and looked at him.

“Spike?”

“Buffy …”

“If I am pregnant, am I going to have to get an abortion?”

Oh God, no! His mind screamed out, though the words didn’t leave his lips.

Spike sat up, bringing her up with him, “We have to talk …”

Buffy sat up and moved to the other side of the couch, sitting Indian style facing him.

“Okay.”

“You’re young …I’m, well …not. You want different things and …”

“What?”

“Buffy let me finish.”

“Uh, how do you know what I want? You’ve never asked!”

This already wasn’t going well, and he’d only said that one part.

“Buffy, do you want kids?”

“Well, yea.”

“Buffy, I don’t. I don’t want kids, I’ve had my one and that’s it.”

“I see.”

“No, let me …”

“Explain? I think you did enough of that.”

“No, I bloody well have not!” he snapped making Buffy jump.

Buffy just looked at him, tears forming in her eyes at being yelled at as if she was a …child.

“Look,” he said turning to face her, “I’m not having anymore kids just so they can be taken away from me. Plus, I need to focus on working. I’m running out of money and time for that, and I can’t also worry about having a job and a kid.”

“Oh, please that is so … not the first part, but that second excuse you gave me is a load of bull. People have jobs and kids all the time, you sound like a fucking woman.” Buffy glared at him and wiped her eyes, so they wouldn’t spill over her cheeks.

“Gee, thanks.” Spike said as he looked away from her.

“Yea, well …” She shrugged then looked up at him. “Are you saying that… this, between me and you … its not going anywhere, is it?”

“I’m sorry …”

“No, I am.” She said as she got up. “Sorry to think that I could … I’m so fucking stupid, why would I want to involve myself with you anyway, just like you said, I’m twenty years old. I … this is …” She sighed. “Just fuck it. A lesson is learned, no one is hurt, just … fuck it.”

Buffy left him sitting there and went to his room, throwing on her clothes. She grabbed the phone and called Faith. She was putting on her shoes when Spike walked in and leaned against the doorframe.

“You’re leaving?”

“Well, I’m not needed anymore; I think we did what I came here for. Oh hey Faith …” Buffy talked into the phone turning her back on him, “Yea, do you remember the house you dropped me off at? Yea? …Well, could you come and get me; I need to get out of here … Okay, thank you, I’ll be waiting outside.” She hung up and stood, going for her purse.

She grabbed it and stood thinking if she was forgetting anything else. She decided she wasn’t and headed for the door, but Spike blocked her path.

“Move.”

“No.”

“Spike, please …”

Spike sighed and twirled his finger around a strand of hair, pursed his lips together and looked at her.

“I’m sorry.”

“I think you already said that.” She felt like she was going to cry and decided instead to get angry. “It was all fun and all, but you’re right. I’m not good for you, and you’re not good for me. Maybe you should find someone more your age instead of running around with me. You know, someone more your …pace. Pretty soon, you won’t even be able to catch up with me, seeing as you’re old …er.”

Spike laughed.

Buffy frowned, “Whatever, Spike just fucking get out of my way.” She shoved him and walked past him, heading to the living room.

“Oh, now not only are you being a brat, you’re shoving me?”

“A brat?!”

“Yes, a fucking brat! You know what? Fuck it, not only do I not want to have a child, I don’t want to be with a child either, just go back home to your mother.”

Buffy slapped him. “Fuck you.”

“I think we already did that right, love? Made you scream my name …” He reminded her.

Buffy opened the door and turned to face him. “Don’t …don’t talk to me, don’t come near me … Just forget about this …” She laughed to ease the tears away, “Forget about last night and this morning. It meant nothing.” She coldly told him, “You mean nothing.”

Then she was gone.

Faith didn’t say anything when Buffy got in the car, but she saw Spike in the window, watching Buffy. Then he turned away as Faith pulled out of the driveway.

“What happened?”

“Bullshit, he’s a fucking jerk and I swear if I ever see him again …” Buffy trailed off as she looked out the window. “And don’t even say, I told you so, because I’m liable to beat your fucking ass.”

“Damn, well, I wasn’t going to say that … even though …” Buffy gave her a warning look, so Faith just shrugged.

“Its gonna be kind of hard never seeing him again. He comes into the diner every morning, B. You’re going to see him.”

Buffy closed her eyes and leaned back in the seat.

“Great.”

Tbc…