Spike watched as Buffy held out her hand for Matthew to shake, but Mattie wouldn’t budge. He was clinging to Spike’s side attempting to hide his face in his father’s thigh. Spike winked at Buffy and picked up the young boy.

“Aren’t you going to say hi?” Spike asked his son.

Mattie shook his head no.

Buffy took in a deep breath, “It’s okay. You don’t have to say hi. I’ll just say hi to you, and pretend you said hi to me.”

Mattie looked at her and smiled a little then turned his head toward his father, “I’m thirsty.”

Buffy held her tray to her chest and tilted her head, “Well, I know what your father wants to drink. What would you like?”

“Juice.”

Buffy smiled, “Juice it is.” She turned and went to her station to get their beverages.

Once Buffy got there she closed her eyes realizing this was a lot harder than she was letting on. Before, it was just she and Spike, but now there was a kid involved. He would always be there, no matter what else happened in their relationship. And he may never like her, or accept her. Then it’s bye-bye Buffy. She started thinking that maybe everyone else, well her mother and Faith – maybe they were right. She had no business getting involved in something like this. Buffy was shaken out of her thoughts when her brunette friend walked through the door. Buffy lifted a brow and looked at her watch.

“Yeah, I know I’m late. Big whoop. It’s my day off.” Faith told her as she passed Buffy going through the double doors.

“Hi to you too,” Buffy said to no one in particular. She let out a breath and began making her way to the table.

Spike nodded to her when he saw Buffy approaching. She placed Matthews’s juice in front of him, and gave Spike his coffee.

“Anything else?” Buffy asked.

“Can I have chicken fingers and french fries?” Matthew continued staring at the menu.

“Sure. Of course,” Buffy said and glanced at Spike. “What about you?”

“Turkey club is fine with me. What time do you get off?” Spike asked.

“Oh, well I’m not sure seeing as people called in today. I’m scheduled to leave at five, so that means I’ll be out of here if I’m lucky at five-twenty.” Buffy shrugged. “Why?”

“I was going to ask …” Spike started.

“Hey, who’s the cutie?” Faith came up behind Buffy, looking over at Matthew.

“My son. His name is Matthew.” Spike told her.

Buffy introduced Faith to Matthew, but he was too shy to say anything. Faith called him a cutie again before she returned to work. Buffy walked away also, going to put their order in.

Spike and Buffy hadn’t had a chance to talk, so he never got the time to ask her to come over for dinner that night. He had taken Mattie home after they had lunch at the diner, spending the rest of the afternoon playing board games. Spike thought it couldn’t get any better than this. They were watching TV when the phone rang. Spike got up and went into the kitchen to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Hey, it’s me.” Buffy said, “I just got home.”

“Oh, that’s great. I was going to ask you to come over for dinner. You know, so you and Mattie could get used to each other.” Spike said while looking through the fridge.

“Don’t you think it’s too early? I mean, he’s been through a lot. I … don’t you think he’ll be pressured?” Buffy asked. She did think it was too early, but she was also scared. She was trying anything to put this off.

“I think right now is as good as time as any Buffy. If you’re going to be in my life, he has to get to know you, like you have to get to know him. So what will it be?” Spike didn’t think anything of it. He was sure that Matthew knew that he and Winifred were divorced. Spike had yet to tell him though that Buffy was his girlfriend, or that she would be staying at the house.

Buffy quietly spoke, “Spike, I’m scared. What if he doesn’t like me? What if he hates me? I mean, this is big. Huge. Big, huge and gigantic. What if … what if I’m not ready for this?”

“What are you saying?”

“Nothing, I … I’ll call a cab. I’ll be there soon, okay?” Buffy decided she was going to go through with this. She loved him and she would do anything to keep him in her life. Well, almost anything.

“Buffy, don’t come here unless you want to. I mean it. I’m asking you to do this because I do want you in my life. I wouldn’t just invite you over here to meet my son if I didn’t want you in my life.” He whispered into the phone.

“Are you done?” Buffy was already getting dressed. She sat on her bed, putting her shoes on.

“Yes.”

“Good, I’ll be over there soon …” Buffy started to say.

“We’ll come get you.” Spike finished.

“Oh, okay then. I’ll wait outside. I’d rather get to know Matthew first before my mother has a chance to. If you come up and knock then she’ll tell me to invite you for dinner. So not ready for that yet.” Buffy went into the bathroom and started putting on her makeup.

“Uh … Right then, I’ll be there in a bit.” Spike told her then hung up.

Buffy put the phone down and stared at herself in the mirror.

“What am I doing?” She asked herself. Buffy shrugged, applied her lipgloss then grabbed her purse going downstairs.

Spike had told Matthew that they were going to get his friend from the diner, and that she would be coming over to eat dinner with them. Mattie told him ‘okay’ not really showing any interest. Aside from playing board and video games, Matthew really didn’t talk much. Spike guessed he was still getting used to what was going on. Maybe Spike was rushing this meeting with Buffy. Maybe he should have waited a little longer. Too late for that, seeing as he pulled up in her driveway and she was walking towards his car.

Spike put the car in park, got out and went to the other side opening the door. Matthew got out and climbed in the backseat putting his safety belt on. Spike gave a shy smile and Buffy got in the car. Spike closed the door, took a deep breath and got back in the driver’s seat. On the way back to Spike’s house Matthew noticed them stealing glances at each other. Matthew just turned his head and looked out the window.

Once they got back to the house, Matthew sat on the couch and turned on the TV. Buffy followed Spike into the kitchen, hopping on the counter to watch him get dinner started.

Spike got out potatoes and started washing them. Buffy opened up the drawer getting out his potato peeler and handing it to him. Spike said a mere ‘thanks’ and got on the task. Buffy just sat there watching him, scared to death to go out into the living room. She decided to wait until dinner, when she knew that Spike would be there for her. Her insides were all mushy and she shook her head at the thought of being intimidated by a seven year old.

Buffy set the table while Spike put the food onto it. He went into the living room and told Mattie that dinner was ready. Man and child returned to the dining room and took their seats. Buffy was already sitting and waiting.

Spike had no idea what to say. He came to the realization that he really didn’t know his son at all. Made it kind of hard for conversation, so he just opted with the first thing that came into his head.

“So, Matthew, Do you like Sunnydale?” Spike asked with a bite of his chicken.

Matthew looked up from his plate at his father and shrugged. “I guess.”

Buffy continued to eat quietly.

Spike continued, “Tomorrow, I’m going to get you enrolled in school. First thing. You could probably even start in the morning.”

“Fine.” Was all he got as a response.

Spike glanced at Buffy, lifted his brow and went back to his food. This was a lot harder than he thought.

Later that night after Matthew was asleep, Buffy and Spike sat on the back porch, talking. After dinner, Matthew had watched a bit of TV then took a bath. Spike had talked to him a bit more then Mattie went to bed.

“So, I guess you have to stay the night, love. He’s in bed so I can’t leave.” Spike grinned at her. He had wanted her to stay anyway. He missed her terribly.

“I’ll call a cab. It’s no biggie.” Buffy said flatly.

“Okay, how about, I want you to stay and I’ll take you to work in the morning.” Spike tried.

“I don’t have my uniform.”

“I’ll take you by your house.”

Buffy sighed, “Do you think that’s a good idea? I mean really?”

“Buffy, I think he knows you’re my girlfriend. It’s okay.”

She didn’t say anything.

“I could just take you home before I take him to school, and then drop you off at work.” Spike said then lit up a cigarette. “It’ll work, just stay with me tonight?”

“I told my mom everything, she knows about us, Winifred, and your son.” Buffy kicked off her shoes and put her feet in Spike’s lap.

“What’d she say?”

“That I should get out of this relationship.”

“And, what did you tell her?”

“Well, obviously no,” she pauses,“Spike, what do you want me to be? Just your girlfriend? A mother? What?”

Spike started playing with her toes and took a drag of his cigarette, “Let’s just work on the girlfriend bit, that’ll work.”

“Spike, stop … that tickles and what do you mean by that’ll work?”

Spike continued despite her telling him to stop, “I mean you’re my girlfriend and right now I’m not asking you to be a mother or a babysitter or whatever else besides my girlfriend, okay?”

“Fine.”

“Now are you staying here or what?” Spike crushed out his cigarette in the ashtray, pushed her feet off of him and stood up.

“I guess.”

“You guess? Well sound enthusiastic why don’t you? Come on …” He picked her up and carried her inside making sure to lock up.

“Spike, you could put me down you know,” She laughed. As the last light went out he made his way to the bedroom. He dropped her on the bed, “There, now you’re down.” He winked and pulled off his shirt. She got up and took off her pants then got back on the bed. Buffy rolled on her stomach away from him and lay her head on the pillow. Spike shut his door and came back taking a seat beside her on the bed. He gently rubbed her back making her moan.

“Rub my shoulders for me.”

“Well, sit up then and I will.” Spike said and moved to sit against the headboard. Buffy sat up and crawled to him. He spread his legs apart and she sat between them, leaning back against him. Spike leaned forward and kissed her neck, then placed his hands on her shoulders and began kneading them.

“Crap now I’m falling asleep …” Buffy leaned her head back against his chest and he stopped his movements. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her in place.

“If I asked you to move in what would you say?” Spike whispered against her hair.

“I’d say give it time, it’s still too early.” She sighed and closed her eyes.

“Okay, are you really going to sleep?”

“Hmm?”

“Guess that would be a yes.” Spike nudged her.

She whined then moved to the other side of the bed. Spike lay down beside her after turning off the light, wrapping an arm around her. He placed his hand on her tummy, his fingers dipping below the waistband of her panties as if keeping her in place.

“Good night Buffy.”

“Mmm hmm,” Then all he heard was soft snoring.

Spike smiled and then also fell asleep.

TBC